Welcome To My Crack Au Where Everything Was Fine And Nothing Bad Ever Happened To Anyone

So in English class we had to draw a scene from The Great Gatsby. After the drawings were done the teacher was showing them to the class, and one drawing was a pic of Gatsby reaching towards at the green light, but in the drawing Gatsby didn’t have hands. So my teacher starts saying something like how this picture has hidden meaning and portrays the helplessness Gatsby feels, and the kid next to me just casually says “I can’t draw hands.”

when I was 14 I worked in a grocery store and one day I got to bag Stephen King’s groceries and of course, being the little horror fiction nerd I am I was completely starstruck

I think he thought I was gonna ask for an autograph because I was not even lowkey staring I was full on moon-faced and bouncing and he kept looking over at me hesitantly like aw jeez kid fuck off

anyways I finally managed to squeak out that I was a huge fan and asked for advice on writing, “how do I write as well as you do?” in my horrible thick German accent and broken ass English and he gave me the best writing advice I have ever received

“shit kid, stop worrying about how other people do it and just write your story”

14 years later my wife and I nearly hit him with our car because he was jaywalking

Just a silly lighthearted page for today :>

coming back after 3yrs just as this site is shutting down to post jayviks and name drop my other socials - find me on twt @OmenBairn

your man doesn’t have the mental strength to caramelize onions 

you can pry starting sentences with 'and' or 'but' out of my cold, dead hands

she was never a jinx.

i feel like people forget that vander immediately recognized her as warwick even after all the years and how much they both had changed. she was silco's daughter, but his little girl, too.

someone get this poor man a chair for the love of god

Find yourself a man who proposes to you using a ring pop candy

God I love how Donna and Ten at the start of Unicorn and the Wasp are like “1920′s party! HELL YEAH” and then they spend 99% of the time just gossiping with each other instead of, like, interacting