Jinx: If You Ever Meet Someone Who Calls Gatorade By The Actual Name Of The Flavor And Not The Color

Just overheard two teenaged boys at the front door of their friend’s house. One was on the phone and gently said, “Oh, did you just wake up?” And the other one yelled “OPEN UP, FUCKNUGGET!” while slamming his hand on the door. I gotta say I love the friendship dynamic

Viktor you deserved so much better from everyone around you 😭

i love it when characters are unfair, actually. i love it when they’re uncouth and cranky and hypocritical, i love it when they have cognitive dissonances, i love it when they make good and bad choices for the wrong reasons. i love when they’re short to anger and hard to understand. i love it when they’ve destroyed themselves for nothing but can’t even see either part of it yet. i love it when they’re messy and selfish and bad at communicating. i love it when they get convinced of their own ego and stuck in a feedback loop regarding their own warped paranoia. i love it when characters actively make their lives unknowingly harder for themselves. i love it when characters don’t know they’re in a story. i love it when characters are like real people

Slow. Clap. http://ift.tt/1euhu0D

It is simply not fulfilling to enjoy media in the height of its popularity. You need to show up so late to the party that everybody else is gone and the hosts are asleep so you can rummage through their trash for chip dip and stale hors d’oeurves to eat alone in the dark like a dirty little raccoon secret

FOUND family??? you think i just found them like this??? babes this is FORGED family. Me & the bros were scrap metal in a junkyard (very valuable, very sharp, very dangerous, uncared for) and we GOT IN THE FUCKING FIRE TOGETHER. WE did this. we said I AM NOT LEAVING YOU and melted into each other for better or for worse (it’s for better) and we are A FUNCTIONAL UNIT now. DO NOT SEPARATE. BATTERIES FUCKING INCLUDED. FOUND family my ass, we built this non-nuclear family unit from the ground up, don’t devalue this!!! it was is and will be a labour of love!!!

when I was 14 I worked in a grocery store and one day I got to bag Stephen King’s groceries and of course, being the little horror fiction nerd I am I was completely starstruck

I think he thought I was gonna ask for an autograph because I was not even lowkey staring I was full on moon-faced and bouncing and he kept looking over at me hesitantly like aw jeez kid fuck off

anyways I finally managed to squeak out that I was a huge fan and asked for advice on writing, “how do I write as well as you do?” in my horrible thick German accent and broken ass English and he gave me the best writing advice I have ever received

“shit kid, stop worrying about how other people do it and just write your story”

14 years later my wife and I nearly hit him with our car because he was jaywalking

You’re a summoner—but all you can summon are slimes. No dragons, no elementals. Just slimes. So you studied. Trained. Experimented. Now your slimes dissolve armor, mimic voices, carry potions, even explode on command. Adventurers laugh—until they realize: you can handle anything with slimes.

What they don’t say is how the storm doesn’t knock on the door. It gets into your shoes, climbs into your lungs, you try to smile but your face doesn’t know how, you try to speak but your throat is filled with water and people keep telling you it’ll pass but what they mean is: "they hope you survive it"

they mean: "please stay long enough to see the sun again" and you nod because it’s easier than saying “I’m already gone.”

But you keep walking or crawling, or dragging yourself by your own breath. You make it through a minute and another and a thousand more. You don’t even notice the moment the storm starts to pass. You just look up one day and the sky is…not clear, but softer.

You laugh and it doesn’t feel like lying.

You cry and it feels like release, not drowning.

And no, you don’t remember how you survived. You don’t remember each battle you had with your own mind or the nights you wanted to disappear.

but you’re still here and that means something, even if your voice trembles, even if you don’t know what comes next.

You stayed.

You stayed.

You stayed.

While putting your favorite condiment on a sandwich, you accidentally make a magical occult symbol and summon a demon.