Silly, Bots Are.

What Leandros *really* reported him to the inquisition for.

Knew a dude that got demoted from captain because he slept with one of his subordinates and she got pregnant

This is why Titus got demoted. Not because of that chaos shit, but because he decided to lose his virginity 😈😈

honestly good for whichever serf or guardsman that'd be able to get their hands on Titus. Or whoever would got Titus' hands on them

id say something unholy but imma hold that back

Ironic that this would please the Emperor more than worshiping him would.

My character, Sister Catherine, of the order of the Valorous Heart. Or simply Cate to those who know her.

She needs an origin story.

A crisis of faith. She prays for guidance to Him on Earth. Surely he would not abandon one of His faithful in their hour of need?

She knelt in the chapel of the blessed Emperor. It was a place of calm and contemplation. Sisters came here to pray. But she was here now out of desperation. She needed Him to answer her, now more than at any time in her life.

"Holy Emperor, hear my prayer. I need your guidance. I have doubt. This has plagued me for months, years even. Please, help me. Guide me. Show me the path forward."

Her head was bowed, her hands clasped tightly together, praying, and hoping for a miracle. Something to relieve her of the doubt and the anguish she felt because of it. But she was only met with the silence of the empty chapel.

"You're not going to answer me, are you?" She said out loud.

She opened her tear stained eyes and looked up at the altar.

"You're not here, are you? You're on Terra, sitting on your golden throne."

She stared at the stained glass depiction of the Emperor. Magnificent in his golden armour, surrounded by the faithful, a halo of light above his head.

"You are not a god."

She half expected to be struck down there and then. Some bolt of unimaginable power incinerating her on the spot.

"The books my family died for, they were right. You are not a god. Written in your own hand, that is what my grandmother said. The inquisition killed them, burnt at the stake as heretics.."

She was only a child, but she remembered the fires. Her mother and grandmother were consumed by the flames. The inquisitor forced her to watch. A lesson, he had said.

"It is a lie. I have lived this lie my whole life. In the schola progenium, in my order. I have prayed to you, sang praises in your name. And I have killed, all in your name. How much blood must stain my hands because of you."

She cleansed her hands each day as instructed by scripture. Clean, pristine even. If she could see the blood, she imagined it would be of the deepest, darkest, red.

"And I am damned. For what can I do? If I confess my lack of faith, they will force me to be repentia, beating myself bloody until I see the light once again. Or worse. Locked in a machine and driven insane."

She had seen the penitent engines in battle. Wild, savage things. Their pilots lost to madness.

"If I run, the inquisition will hunt me. They will likely send my own sisters after me. There is no mercy for the heretic. Isn't that what you teach?"

She knew the tortures an inquisitor could inflict first hand. Both physical and mental. She would not let that be her fate.

"Must I die for you then? Is that my only choice? Or turn to the foulness of the warp. Must that be my salvation? What vile corruption would I have to endure."

She thought about the chaos tainted cultists she had fought in the past. Barely recognisable as even human anymore. Chanting dirges to their dark gods.

"No. I would rather turn my bolt gun on myself. If you are not a god, then neither are they. The creatures of the warp will not have me. I deny them. As I deny you."

The blasphemy she spoke. She would have killed someone outright if they had spoken like this to her. Now she speaks it herself. In his own chapel, no less.

"We go to war soon. Another crusade in your name. Do you know why? Do you even care?"

In the battles ahead, how many were going to die? How many deaths would she be responsible for? All for a lie. Maybe being condemned to a penitent engine would be a blessing. They at least did not struggle with faith.

"I still have my sisters. I depend on them, as they depend on me. They will be my faith from now on, my shield. I will fight for them."

She stood. She would have to lie to her sisters and convince them her faith is strong and beyond question. What choice did she have?

The Emperor is not a god.

A simple statement, yet so powerful it could condemn an entire world. What could it do to one sister of battle?

Wait, you're telling me that plate mail, which people were relying on to keep themselves alive, is well-designed? Inconceivable!

You know, I can kind of see the fire prism one.

And now I want to see someone draw shipgirl-like versions of each of those tanks.

(I would but I suck at drawing)

what warhammer tank do you think is the most fuckable looking?

Objectively, the Caladius Grav-Tank is pretty and curvy and fancy, but the Hekaton Land Fortress, if that counts, is four Cs thicc at the back, which you simply can't ignore. The Fire Prism brings that "femboy packing a monster can" energy which is quite popular nowadays, and so worth consideration. The Baneblade line is obviously appealing at a surface level, but the poor ballistic skill speaks to a quantity-over-quality situation that would leave even the neediest Magos disappointed.

Hello Kitty marines always go incredibly hard. The colors are very striking, and the soulless dark eyes go very well with warhammer.

"yoU'rE PAiNtInG tHEm WroNG"

Get fucked, loser.

So... appearantly when Bile falls asleep, he dreams of his fucking surgery thingy deattaching itself from him and conducting its own experiments. This is a genuine canon thing.

(I swear this man is only 50% mad scientist, the rest is just him being a silly tired gandpa)

"It came to me in a dream" is more compelling credentials for a source than having asked ChatGPT.

Lung cancer is all ing your lungs, and it will still kill the rest of you.

"it's all in your head" correct! unfortunately I am also in there

I've been thinking a lot about how many marines a Space Marine chapter actually has.

There's a lot of guys that aren't included in the "1000 marine" limit. Each company has a command squad and standard bearers/ancients, and then there's the specialist branches of the Apothecarion, Armory, Librarius, and Recclusiam, and then the Honor Guard, a bunch of officers, and all sorts of other things.

Each chapter probably has between a couple hundred and a few hundred marines in addition to the ten companies, ten squads per company, ten marines per squad.

Worship the Emperor, of course.

My retweet challenge from Twitter.