When He Says He Doesn’t Feel Comfortable With Allowances...

Dating a broke man is stupid, marrying a broke man is even dumber and having children with a broke man is child abuse.

Source: Pinterest.

Goodbye Tumblr

I wanted to give a 10 page letter but fuck that let’s keep it short and sweet. 

As of today, @strategicho, SbCaribbeanBeauty and @beneficeduvagin will be laid to rest. In my heart, I think this is a perfect time to say bye. Ever since last week,  I had this feeling and I’m ready. Thank you to the people who let me be myself without censorship and embraced me. I went from a curious mind, novice, sugar baby, confident failer, spoiled girlfriend, to a woman who is with a man who sponsors me/gets on my last damn blood vessel nerve and I created a business behind his back and now he wants me to return to being a basic beech again. 

I was offered an opportunity and yeah…THE SUITCASE MUST BE SECURED. 

I didn’t expect this to be emotional but it is. I will genuinely miss you, even the beeches who hate my guts here…I will miss you too.  I’ve intentionally removed myself from my comfort zone and I’m seeing a side of me I always thought I could be but never thought I was worthy of being. My word of advice is to always put yourself as a priority. The situations you have with men/women, make sure you always have something to look forward to when it’s over. Don’t ever take directions from someone who doesn’t know the address to your destination. (me being fake deep) 

If you see anyone who writes in behalf of me or claims to be me issa damn lie. (packs large bag) Meh leaving and meh fah never come back! Poopa Geezus! Kiss mehhh rasssssssss (starts catching the spirit in the bathroom)

 mi hav to leave mon. M'ap kite ou cherie. I LOVE YOU GREEN CARD. Menzami map dispose nan LIRR. Wooooooooy Jezu!

(Vitamin C song starts playing)  As we go on We remember All the times we Had together And as our lives change Come whatever We will still be Hoes forever  

Honestly

I love to be a whore. I love to be society’s slut and have be around me who hate me, But secretly envy me. I used to be one of those girls that be like “She such a hoe.” Or “Look At what she’s wearing.” While secretly being jealous of her confidence. Now that I’m much older I look back and wish I could of befriended that person. They defied society standereds of a women and didn’t give a fuck.

So many of you don’t actually hustle. But spend all damn day complaining.

Like a lot of you don’t take the time to step out of your boundaries, step out of your comfort zone. So many of you don’t do things because you think it’ll harm your self worth or that its below you. Its affect your money, honey.

When you’re an escort at $400 an hour, but you haven’t gotten any calls But you won’t create a quick second persona and charge  200$ because its below you to accept that little.

Or you’re online reblogging sugar baby self help posts and wondering why dudes on SA are so cheap. While you have bills to pay and rent to make, you can’t take a few headless nudes and sell em on kik? Or accept that splenda daddy, use him to tide you over until you get your whale?

I dislike online sex work. I’m not good at it and its boring/awkward for me. But I did it for a couple weeks, paid my all bills and got a new wardrobe. I toured SF at a high rate and had only a few chomps. I brought out my old lower rate persona and advertised, made all my money back and more. 

If you’re capable of charging a higher rate, it doesn’t make you bad if you accept less than it. Stop tying this work to your self worth. It doesn’t make you pathetic if you need to sell your snapchat. I’ve got friends who make bank off their snapchat and manyvids, I wish I could do what they do.

Simply said your lateral whorephobia is affecting your coins. Stop sitting around waiting for someone to book you at your high price, while your bills pile up and you can’t eat. Make your fucking money and stop worrying about what others might think. I still respect you whether you’re 800/hr or 150/hr. 

What I respect is that you’re making an effort to get your money and not sitting around waiting for it to come to you.

What Makes Her Classy?

When it came to refining my image, I knew instantly what persona I wanted to portray: The Classy Lady. I wanted potential clients to take one look at my photos and know automatically that the purchase of my companionship would not be cheap. 

But I also didn’t want just any client either. Just because he has the money doesn’t mean we would be a great match. For example, I’m not great with young guys or partiers. So I wanted guys of that type to take a look at my pictures and know that we most likely wouldn’t be a good match as well. I’m most compatible with romantics and laidback, professional types. 

I knew my persona. I knew my ideal client. But there was a problem:

I wasn’t quite sure how to depict this in my photos.

I need my photos to do most of the “talking” for me (because we know men don’t always read your blog, site, ad, etc. but they always look at the pictures). 

So I begin browsing various providers’ sites that I felt emulated the persona that I wanted to portray. And were most likely getting the type of clientele that I’m aiming for.

Once I gathered enough pictures, I asked myself, what is it about her pictures/album/gallery that makes her fit this persona? 

Or to put it bluntly: how the hell do I look high-end in my pictures?!* 

Here’s what I noticed: 

She picks one asset at a time to show off (if she’s showing off her breasts, every other asset is covered up)

The lingerie always matches. And there’s usually stockings and/or a garter belt added as well.

Professional/Quality photos. Even the “candid” photos are clear with lots of lighting. 

Adding “feminine” touches to the pictures like flowers.

Having name brand/designer items in the photos. The red bottoms are shown off (literally). The Chanel bag is in her hand. The Agent Provocateur box is on display. I noticed that this is never “over done”. There’s usually only one noticeable luxury item in the picture and it’s never the focal point. 

Makeup is always kept neutral/natural. The boldest I’ve seen is a red lip.

Hair is styled simply and always looks “touchable”. It’s usually lightly curled.

The surroundings are neat and clean.

No explicit posing (no “spread leg” shots).

Nude pictures are done more “artistically”. Less Playboy. More Italian Vogue. 

Business attire. This is one that I hadn’t really noticed but it’s everywhere. Dresses are knee length or longer. The clothing is “work/office appropriate”.  

Plenty of clothed photos. In some cases, I’ve noticed some providers would almost have as many clothed pictures as lingerie or nudes photos. Almost. 

Few casual pictures. Obviously if you’re going for “girl next door”, this wouldn’t apply. However, I’ve noticed that there will be one, maybe two pictures of her dressed “casually”, i.e. jeans and a t-shirt. The majority of the clothed pictures will be taken in skirts, dresses, business attire, etc.

Robes. This was another one I hadn’t really noticed at first but almost every provider’s site that I visited there was at least one picture of her in a robe. And it was usually long, flowy and “feminine” (light colors, lace, etc).

Simple jewelry. Or no jewelry at all. 

If anyone else is using this persona (or plans to), feel free to add to the list!

*Yes, I’m aware that there’s more than one way to look “high-end” and that not every provider wants to portray this image. There are multiple personas that a provider may embody such as Playboy/bombshell, girl next door, bad girl, etc. However, because this is the persona I’ve chosen, this is the “look” that I’m focusing on.

Hi How are you? I was wondering have ever heard or worked in Monaco before? I heard a lot women go there around grand prix or Cannes?

A lot of women go to both the Cannes Film Festival and the Monaco Grand Prix. It can literally be the biggest payday of the year for an escort, can set a sugarbaby up with a whale (or two) and for girls that just want to live the jetset life, it can give them a mile long list of contacts. As long as you go in with a solid game plan, I highly recommend going to both events if you’re into this type of lifestyle. 

And although you didn’t ask, I have to talk more about this because I love the French Riviera so much. So in no particular order here are my suggestions, tips, opinions, etc:

The “route” works like this: Cannes for the Film Festival (it comes first, around the middle of May) then Monaco for the Grand Prix (it happens at the end of May) and then you can leave and go home but in my opinion while you’re in the area you may as well make a visit to St Tropez lol. If you really have your heart set on staying in Cannes or Monaco, book your accommodations as far in advance as you can. Both the Festival de Cannes and the Formula One are really good at posting next year’s dates super early (usually not to long after that year’s event has taken place) so be on the lookout and book early. Book your hotel first, then your airfare. Hotels can get ungodly expensive right before the events. 

Now if you don’t care about staying in Cannes or Monaco (and honestly, you shouldn’t, especially if this is your first time) or if you’re on a budget, stay in either Nice or Antibes. Now, if it were me, I would stay in Antibes. Antibes is about a 10 minute train ride from Cannes and quite a few celebrities (and other affluent people) stay in Antibes instead of Cannes during the film festival. FYI: the hotel they usually stay at is Hotel du Cap at Eden Roc, and while it’s most likely booked solid by now if you’re really into celebrity spotting, you can always go for lunch or a spa treatment (just make a reservation). Hell you could probably go for breakfast, they start serving at 7:30 lmao. Wherever you choose to stay remember the hotel room should mainly be functioning as your storage/dressing room. Don’t spend too much time in the room or the hotel itself. Store your belongings. Change into your clothes. Sleep (but the “sleeping” part is up to you. Depending on who you meet and your game plan, you may not be sleeping in your hotel room at all lol).

If you’re staying outside of Cannes/Monaco do not take the bus. Let me repeat that, do not take the bus. Don’t do it to yourself, you’ll have a headache by the end of the day. It literally takes like 2 hours to get anywhere during this time of the year if you’re on the bus. Take the train, it only costs a few dollars more and if you’re in Antibes it will get you to Cannes in 10 mins, Nice to Cannes in about 25 mins. Now when it comes time to “work” in Monaco, you may want to stay in Nice because the transport time is shorter, about 15 mins I think. Antibes to Monaco can be anywhere from about 35 mins to 1 hour. Still not bad though.   

Know whether or not you’re going to approach this as a sugar baby or as an escort because you will get propositioned. This is of course what you want if you’re an escort, but not so much if you’re a sugar baby. So know “your role” before you go. Not only will it make things a lot easier but it will keep you from looking naive. 

Speaking of naive…know your rates/allowance in both euro and american dollars. 

Speaking of rates… if you’re an escort, know what you’re going to charge for half a day, a full day, overnights, weekend, etc. Most men when they go to events like this do not want to be with someone for just an hour or two. 

Look on point at all times. *takes a deep breath*  LOOK ON POINT AT ALL TIMES!!! Sis, when you step out of that hotel room or from that train, you better be slaying. There will be competition. Girls from all over the world flock to the film festival and the grand prix because of the amount of wealth that surrounds these kinds of events - the amount of money and luxury you see is almost surreal at times. 

It never hurts to have business cards (but only if you’re escorting and make sure they’re discreet).

If you don’t know anything at all about the film festival or the grand prix, read about it while you’re on the plane/train. It’s always a good idea to be informed. You don’t need to know everything but at least know some of the highlights of the festival and who won the grand prix last year.

I don’t know if this will be your first time attending either event/location but if it is, visit with reasonable expectations. There are some girls that visit these places and think that they’re going to end up on the arm of Leo while walking the red carpet by the next day….

Now, I will say that usually the ones that end up disappointed are the sugar babies/jet set girls because they put their focus on the wrong thing. Their focus should be on networking and making contacts so they can begin forming relationships with affluent men, potential whales and like minded ladies.  

Escorts and their expectations are a bit different. I personally don’t know anyone who didn’t make back their money plus some when they went (unless they had some insane expectations - which has happened) but that’s because the escort’s goal is usually “I need/want to make X amount of dollars by the end of this week”. A sugar’s goal should be “I want to meet potential sponsors and begin relationships with them”.

Some girls get caught up in the glitz and fanfare and lose sight of the bigger picture. 

And this post has already gotten so long and I’m not done. Stay tuned for part 2 lol. 

I hate men but love money

Rant:

As a sex worker I honestly just hate my body.

I’m thinking about getting a bbl and getting some ribs removed for the desired body I want. I feel like nobody in the sex worker world really talks about the eating disorders or the lack of self esteem that comes with being a hoe.

And if you wanna be honest. I didn’t really start hating my body until I become a sex worker. 🤷🏽‍♀️

My Guide to Escorting: Part 1

This is a comprehensive post about escorting! Under a readmore of course. Part 2 will include information about websites, how to cover your ass, pricing, payment, LLCs & DBAs, taxes, and how to up your game.

I. SETTING GOALS & EXAMINING WHY YOU WANT TO GET INTO IT

This should be your first step. What do you want to accomplish? Make sure that it isn’t out of desperation because you may put yourself in danger. If you are desperate, clear your mind. Escorting is fast money, but not all of it is good money. Please stay aware of that.

II. RESEARCH YOUR AREA

Is your area a place that you can market yourself in? Are there enough wealthy men looking to spend? If there are, you’re gold. While you’re at it, look up the legalities of escorting in your area. It’ll determine how you should operate. If you’re in the US, please educate yourself on the SESTA/FOSTA laws.

III. DECIDE HOW YOU WANT TO ESCORT/ADVERTISING

Do you want to be on a website (i.e. Eros), or freestyle? How would you go about either in your area? If you’re in a smaller city, freestyling in person may not be viable for you compared to someone in NYC. If you’re in a larger city, it may be easier for you to freestyle. More fish in the sea. It depends on your area and what you’re most comfortable with. If you will be advertising, will you use Twitter, Fetlife, Niteflirt, etc. as addons? If so, take extra precaution that your info can’t be tracked back. I don’t know much about Eros, so I’m not going to write a guide on how to use it. However, I will discuss freestyling.

Freestyling doesn’t always have to be in person. You can freestyle on Tinder, Hinge, OKC, Pure, Niteflirt, Fetlife, or anything that isn’t strictly for escorting. If you have a good bio and great pictures, you will be fine. Don’t mention money on the app, get his number and discuss money using your fake phone/fake number. If he doesn’t bite, goodbye. If he does, you have a client. Watch who you’re matching with for telltale signs of a cop though (i.e. they look poor as shit. Always pictures in public settings like public bathrooms). Set your location in areas that cops can’t afford, and make it specific to neighborhood if you can.

If you’re freestyling in person like at a bar, the way to avoid stings and to avoid lower end clients is to go to highly expensive areas on weekdays (when no specials are being run) to places that aren’t known for hoeing. Don’t dress indecently. Befriend the bartender, they know where the regular big spenders are and when they go. Tip them well and chat them up. However, you can freestyle at places beyond bars and restaurants. Bookshops, coffee shops, anywhere in affluent areas with men of quality. When it comes to speaking to a potential client, you don’t always have to allude to something sexual either. You can talk freely (with your persona on of course) with a few flirts here and there and give them your card with your site on it. Men who’re interested in you will look up your site and see what you’re about, and nothing was illegal about that exchange. How many clients you get based off of this is directly correlated to how much work you put into it.

You should also determine whether you’ll be doing incalls or outcalls.

IV. FIGURE OUT YOUR BRAND

How will you market yourself? This will be your genuine brand, the person your clients will see you as. Because of this, it should be something you can emulate easily. Are you a girl next door type? A vixen? An erudite? A mix of them? Whatever you choose, don’t stray from that lane. You should eat and breathe your persona whenever you are “on”. I recommend looking up the 13 Feminine Seduction Archetypes and seeing how you can play into yours. It’ll make snapping your persona “on” much easier. Also, you should pick a name based off of your brand. Ensure it’s not common, or taken by a popular escort. You should want your own shine.

Branding will not include all of your essence in its core. It is simply about the parts of you that your clients will most enjoy. To effectively brand, you have to envision your perfect client. What do they look like? What do they like to discuss? To eat? What are their likes and dislikes? What do they pride themselves on? After you’ve figured this out, do your research (again) on your area. Figure out how many of your perfect clients exist near you. Find everything they dislike and throw it out. Find everything they like and amp that up. For example, my perfect client I know would dislike any references to or about pop culture because they’re monied and ~cultured~. If my client hates pop culture, there is a good chance he will hate outfits that are not sophisticated and smart. So fast fashion and cheap-looking lingerie is out of the window. I know my perfect client would read Forbes, travel magazines, and investing magazines. The first and last items are business related. While he’ll want to discuss them (and while I have the range to discuss it), I am trying to be his getaway. So I will focus primarily on those travel magazines. Read those. What hot spots does your perfect client enjoy? Is it rustic, classic, or modern? What does he like to do in these hot spots?

Figure it out.

V. PICTURES

This is based off of what you are trying to market yourself as. However, you should choose different settings and poses that will appeal to your ideal client. If you are just starting and don’t have money for professional pictures, find a sub that can do your heaux pictures if you dominate them (real shit, there are men like this) or use well-taken selfies (NOT OF YOUR FACE & HAVE THEM TASTEFULLY DONE). Something I am valuing in my pictures is color theory. I am marketing myself as a getaway, so I noted which colors I saw most saturated in those travel magazines; which ones convey serenity and/or unadulterated passion. Reds, yellows, blues, whites/creams, pinks are my prime colors. I want to blend with the image of a getaway so that their minds associate me with luxurious peace. If you’re marketing yourself as the girl next door, your pictures will be vastly different from mine. However, you should always have uniform lingerie, some body makeup on, and some nice heels. It doesn’t have to be expensive as long as it’s good quality. Ensure that your clothed pictures get the same energy. PLEASE no spandex dresses or anything of the sort. The type of clients who’ll enjoy that will be low quality. If you’re not going with a hoetographer, learn how to blur your face out. Don’t pose in any reflections that would make blurring more tricky, and don’t pose in your apartment if you can help it. If so, do not give a big profile of the room out. If you know how to use Lightroom and Photoshop, all the better.

If you’re trying to be more high-end, do more clothing pictures than you do seductive/lingerie/naked pictures. Show the assets tastefully. Trust me. The more thought you put into your photos, the more your clients will pay.

VI. SAFETY

Do you have any friends that you can check in with while you’re with a client? If not, can you download apps that allow an app to check on you (i.e. Life360, bSafe, Kitestring) and call for help if you don’t check in on time? Do you have access to a taser, gun, knife, or pepper spray, and do you know how to use them? Have you taken a self defense class? Do you have a fake phone or fake number you can use? (Hoe emails can come later–use ProtonMail) If you’re doing an incall, have a trusted person with a key to your apartment just in case. Keep all personally identifiable information away from reach and locked up. Personally, I keep a separate apartment for incalls so that they don’t know where I live. If they do, they are one background check away from knowing your real first and last name. (I rented out this apartment through my LLC, so if they tried to backtrack into the apartment’s history, all they can find is my LLC name. That only links back to my DBA. My DBA can only be traced back to my name if they personally went to the county clerk’s office and illegally obtained it. You should work on being as anonymous as possible. I’ll talk about how to set one up later in the next post.)

If you’re doing an outcall, do a check of the entire place with weapon in hand to ensure that he is the only one in the room. Stay in large hotels with staff that’ll give a damn about you. Never go to his house, never do any drugs or get drunk. Have a “get out” plan and be able to formulate a quick one in your head. ALWAYS make sure you always get the money first and make sure it’s real. Have them give it to you in an envelope, book, or card inconspicuously. Never let them tie you up or put you in any position you can’t get out of. Bring your own condoms, they might poke holes in theirs or they might be expired. Check periodically to make sure the condom’s still on. If they’re trying to position you a certain way again and again, there may be a camera in the room. Make sure to check for one and ensure that both of your phones/laptops/whatever are off and far from reach.

VII. SCREENING

I felt that this deserves its own bulletpoint, although it does go hand in hand with safety. YOU MUST SCREEN. I don’t care if they’re a celebrity, you don’t know them. SCREEN. Ask for their first, middle, and last name, and their real number. You can ask for their home address, work address, anything or everything that will help you find info on them faster. Use Zabasearch, Stud or Dud, Whitepages, Google, Facebook, LinkedIn, PeopleFinders, LipstickAlley (if they’re a known hoe), Instagram, anything and everything that gives you their information. If you don’t have a good feeling about someone, TRUST IT. Don’t skimp on this step at all. If you find anything you don’t like, decline to see them.