Tidbitch - Just Chillin

harry dubois if he was a young witch trying to solve the disappearance of her neighbors cat in a small village in the alps

the feminine urge to run away from home with nothing but a razor blade and vodka, and cut yourself in the middle of the woods until you bleed out, surrounded by the beauty of nature and some very confused rabbits.

If u want to write a story about a character that’s just you but hotter with a dark twisted backstory and magical powers and a pet falcon or something, I think u should just go ahead and do that. Who’s gonna stop you? The government?? Fuck the police.

The Human Fucker Community on Monster Tumblr: Christmas Special

🦇EVIL-Empoaroar👑 Follow

Update on my human hero step-son via seducing both parents: we had a nice bonding moment over a mutual hatred of bicyclists who think traffic laws don't apply to them and the like. Got him porn and a license to kill for Christmas. I think I'm getting the hang of this human dad thing.

(64,234 Notes)

Hooman-hugger🤗 Follow

Out of the way orc lover, I'm getting me some hussy.

Hooman-hugger🤗 Follow

Just learned that hussy is an actual word so it's not clear I was just doing the 'part of word + ussy' joke with humans. Wait maybe I can still save this.

Hooman-hugger🤗 Follow

Out of the way orc lover, I'm getting me some humussy.

(343,244 Notes)

Or-gir👹 Follow

Hey guys, what are human rights? The human I just snatched was saying something about how what I was doing was against it.

🦇EVIL-Empoaroar👑 Follow

They're not important, don't worry about it.

Or-gir👹 Follow

Got it, thanks.

🐉Dragevening Follow

Human rights are important. It's not right to just grab up humans and force them to love you.

Wish the human fucker community (tired of this name tbh) had more basic respect for human autonomy and interest in actual consensual relationships. They're not pets or cheap sex toys. The most rewarding parts of my human romances have been the quiet tender moments together just talking. But some of y'all don't seem to want any of that.

🐺 HereWolf Follow

Why would you say something so controversial yet so true?

🧛Vampy-Vevito Follow

But like if you hypnotize the human to be okay with it then it's not really a problem because now they're consenting to it.

🐺 HereWolf Follow

Most self aware vampire.

(982,344 Notes)

Bog-bitch🧙‍♀️Follow

Hey guys I know it's Christmas time but I got a great idea for a horror story.

Bog-bitch🧙‍♀️Follow

What if there was a sexy human you asked out, but they turned you down because they're in a h4h relationship and not into monsters. And their partner was bland as hell.

🐻 Beard-Toucher Follow

I'd scream and cry and never love or leave my home again. Either that or take out the collar.

(809 Notes)

🧝Elfeven Follow

Anti elf bigotry always gets so much more frustrating this time of year with the unfunny jokes about the toys and the north pole, but my human SO and their family hasn't done any of that and I'm really grateful for it.

(20 Notes)

Experience the original trilogy: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

i think i loved you, but i guess i'll never really know

joan tierney / death cab for cutie / sylvie baumgartel / the crane wives / @araekni / khalid hosseini / lev st valentine / wendy cope / richard siken (reordered)

Make the most of the next two months

Get all your vaccines

Travel while we have a functioning DOT

Read and buy books on feminism, anti-racism, pro-lgbt

Attend drag shows

Don't skip any of your classes

Read and buy history books

Find your out-of-state networks

Learn to carry cash

Get birth control solutions

Support the Biden/Harris administration

Postpone large purchases and save money

Be careful of what you say online, like un-ambiguous attacks against the incoming administration, especially in spaces that contain your full name or personal information

Feel free to add on.

i read CS Lewis’ A Grief Observed one time years ago and i’m still not recovered from it