I Feel Like An Awful Person.

I‘m a burden for everyone. I’m even a burden to myself.

I genuinely think it's too late for things to turn better for me. I feel like a lost cause

I'm back to the point where I cry myself to sleep at night because of how alone and worthless I feel.

I wish I had the courage to end it all.

It feels like no matter who I mirror, no matter how hard I try to please people, no matter how nice I try to be— no one fucking likes me enough to stay or just return my energy equally. It’s so exhausting but I keep trying and trying to get this love and attention but it’s not sticking.

feeling like a huge fucking burden lol

I feel like I need them more than they need me. Even if I am that one that ruined everything, I still need them. I crave them. It feels like they could care less. It's what I deserve.

I dont see my therapist again until school starts and I've just unlocked a new trauma. I can only talk to one person about it and I'm freaking out. I hate this. I hate life. I'm so uncomfortable and upset and disgusted by everything. I was just starting to like myself.

If you have me in your life, I’m really really sorry.