Now More Than Ever We Need To Make Tumblr Unmarketable, Do NOT Invite The Government Into This Space.

"just write the story you want to read!" they said. well, guess what, now i have 14 unfinished drafts because apparently, i want to read 14 different stories at once.

Honestly, you don't need dating advice save for "just be yourself". If a guy isn't seduced by your extensive lecture about coealacanths, or a girl isn't impressed by you gaming the McDonald's systems to finesse yourself 30 free chicken nuggets, you're on a date with the wrong person. Not a bad person, but one that isn't the right match for you, and the way you want to live.

First dates are for showing someone "hey this is the kind of life I like to be living", them doing the same, until you find someone who clicks and you both think "fuck yeah I want to live like this." Whether that's sitting in a café judging joggers, or casually committing small crime for shits and giggles.

One of my favourite parts about autistic people is how you can use other peoples' reflections of them like an echolocation bullshit detector. Like they personally do not need to do shit for this to work, they just passively emit their own autistic vibe that bounces off every surface around them, and you can assess another person's level of self-awareness by how they reflect it back.

"Autistic people do not understand social hierarchy" nope, they understand you're supposed to be an authority here, but they won't politely pretend to respect you if they think you're incompetent.

"Autistic people do not understand humour" nope, they just don't politely pretend to laugh to humour you, and you are simply not funny.

"Autistic people are rude" nope, they just don't think it's polite to lie to you, and don't care about trying to tell you what they think you want to hear instead of telling you what they think.

"Autistic people sometimes have emotional meltdowns for absolutely no reason" nope, you're just insufferable to be around and the person with the lowest tolerance of your shit is simply the canary in the coal mine who breaks first.

It's actually funny how humans decided "fuck living in caves with all these creepy crawlies", got out of caves, built houses that have all the nice parts of a cave without any of the yucky parts, and then all the little bugs and spiders and other creepy crawly creatures that used to also live in caves thought "sweet, new and improved caves" and moved right back in with us.