Wei Wuxian Wanted To Save Everyone But Lan Wangji Wanted To Save /him/

exactly

When you love the most natural thing in the world is to want to be together, but you must understand this does not always imply a physical proximity. Life is busy, time is limited, obligations seemingly multiplying and never-ending, and yet that doesn't stop the desire to be with the one your heart longs for. So we find ways, our soul searches them out, and then we find them in the rain and in every wistful cloud, in the beauty of flowers and in the music of the wind. We color them into the songs we listen to, into the magic of the stars. We hear them whisper in our souls the truth of our hearts. You kiss them with your thoughts and caress them with every smile. You hold their hand when you reminisce of the memories you have created with your lives, with your time, so entwined. And so we satisfy the need that beats in us, and we learn to love the essence of their soul, in the distance, in the silence, and never are they truly far away from us.

e.v.e.

i've decided im gonna try and lose the ability to love things good night

Nothing that happens is ever forgotten, even if you can’t remember it. Spirited Away 千と千尋の神隠し (2001) dir. Hayao Miyazaki

Please remember that almost everyone around you is traumatized. I didn’t understand this when I was younger. I wondered why people acted so strangely and irrationally. Maybe all children wonder this. The author Robert Anton Wilson said (paraphrasing), “We have never seen a completely sane adult human.” No one makes it out of this life alive. It’s not their fault. Mercy, kindness, forgiving — these are what makes one human. They are other names for love. People break in the strangest of ways.

healthy relationships with people? we don’t know her

thank you @jiang-yanlii and @miannmian the inspiration. y'all truly are my muses /p <3

so. wangxian yuuri!!! on ice au?

so Wei Ying is an up and coming ice skater from China who idolises the beloved prodigy skater of China, Lan Wangji. he first fell in love with ice skating when he was watching a recording of Lan Zhan's juniors performance with his best friend Nie Huaisang.

he immediately started consuming everything ice skating and Huaisang helps him as he too shares a love of the ice. he even gets himself a bunny when he sees a cute little bunny when he sees that Wangji got a bunny named Bichen. he names his beloved bunny Suibian.

he gets ballet training from his beloved godmother Baoshan Sanren who encourages him to ice skate competitively because she sees his passion when very few others do. so he decides to compete after a lot of deliberation. Madam Yu isn't happy about this but considering that everyone else supports him, she decides to shut up for once (I'll tone down the abusive tendencies for my own sanity).

as the years go by, he definitely becomes a pretty big name in the skating world. while he does have an outgoing personality and image, he still has a hard time performing thanks to episodes and often gets low technical scores. he goes to Detroit at eighteen to pursue better training opportunities. (it was Baoshan Sanren who had to tell Wuxian in somewhat harsh but loving words that he should go and pursue better opportunities outside of Yunmeng.)

so he trains with our coach OC and Wen Qing and Wen Ning, his roommates who let him stay at their place. after seeing Wuxian underperform way too many times, his coach talks to him and encourages him to get therapy which ends up helping him with PTSD and anxiety a lot.

fast forward to the Sochi Grand Prix Final. Wei Ying is incredibly excited because it's his day. he's finally made it to the Grand Prix and it might be the day he beats his idol and catch his attention. he's performed pretty well at his short program so he has a good chance of winning even if the famous Lan Zhan is competing. then comes the phone call. when his jiejie calls him with the news of Suibian's death, he finds himself unable to concentrate and on the verge of an anxiety attack. his coach has to calm him down and despite of his coach telling him to withdraw since he's not in a condition to perform well, he insists repeatedly on skating anyway. of course, he crashes and burns.

a few months later, he comes back to his hometown after five years with the intention of retirement. Madam Yu was right, I just wasted all of that money and time when I could have been here for my family, he thinks. his godmother Baoshan Sanren is there to pick him up and deliver him to the Jiangs safely at the train station and he gets quite a mouthful for not informing everyone about his plans. his jiejie and didi are both supportive in their own different ways and he gets to meet Jiang Cheng and Huaisang's adopted triplets for the first time. he firstly talks to Suibian and mostly mopes around and helps around the house whenever he can. when he finally gets the courage to get back on the ice, he performs his favourite routine of Lan Zhan for Huaisang. unknown to them, the kids had recorded the whole thing and put it on the internet and it spreads on to every social media possible (actually knowing Huaisang, he probably put his kids up to it.)

at first, Wei Ying freaks out and avoids social media for days. but then, one day after coming back from the rink he sees a very familiar rabbit in the hutch he'd built for Suibian. when Yanli confirms his suspicions by talking about the nice gentleman from your posters who just arrived, he freaks out and runs to the hot springs area. he barges in on Lan Zhan bathing and there's an awkward second, before Wangji says through gritted teeth, "Get. Out."

and that's all I have for now :))

finally pushed away everyone in my life now i can go back to isolation

My brother cracked my rib one morning and gave me half of his orange in the evening.

I remember being younger and sometimes wishing to be a single child, to have all the attention and gifts and time but when he was away from home for the first time, I remember crying and stroking his side of the sofa as if blurting out my first wish- for him to be home, without thinking twice, without a shadow of doubt. Even the genie cried. Growing up with a sibling is like being the only people on a stranded boat, constantly figuring out how you can live with them and questioning how you could ever live without them.

One evening, in a fit of anger, I told him how I never wanted him to be my brother and he yelled that he didn't ask for it either. The air smelled like kerosene and my chest was filled with arsenic. I was raging and threw his favorite toy aeroplane down the window, 7 stories of guilt and shame. He cried all night and I wanted to cut off my right hand, the hand that hurt my baby brother. I didn't know if he was ever going to forgive me or even talk to me. The next morning at breakfast, he didn't look at me or say a word, I felt like my chest was about to explode and guilt clouded my vision. But then, I felt a hand quietly holding half of an orange my way.

The only people on a stranded boat. How do you live with them? How could you ever live without them?

-Ritika Jyala, excerpt from The world is a sphere of ice and our hands are made of fire

Edit: I added a visualizer for this on my YouTube channel. Check it out here

wangxian’s reunions (episodes 11, 20, 28, 32, 2)