Latest Posts by unrecommendedforyou - Page 8

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Video of Tama

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That universal feeling of terror when you skip a step accidentally 

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oh my god [sound on]

can you please tag ur death note spoilers i just saw a photoset of light yagami with the death note dont tell me hes kira

Gorillas are magnificent, majestic creatures full of grace and beauty… except when it rains. 

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Creative & DIY

Someone get this man a skateboard

Sorry, it was just me socializing

hm. I sense cringe was done

"Choose not a life of imitation"

Oh man, i want these to fr be my last words

your last words before you die are the 3rd line of the last song you listened to. what are we saying ladies?

This is the way you’re supposed to do pranks!

A bird explaining to a hedgehog crossing so it doesn’t die.

this is superior humor

Hate when ppl call fidgety stuff a "nervous habit" I'm bouncing my leg cause I'm bored not cause I'm a scared little bitch

Damn it. I just wish once you would say something stupid so I could ignore it.

7 million people in the earth. 0 messages in my Inbox

A school of fish following a duck

Astronaut readjusts to life back on Earth

> Don’t give him a baby for a while.

damn people still have beef over tumblr, i am only here to look at pictures of the video game 

Unmute !

We abducted humans.

To be fair, we abducted members of every new race. Abduct a small percentage of the population, expose them to some galactic prisoners, and we get a good idea of what germs, diseases, and viruses will make the jump between races. Do this over the course of a [roughly equivalent to a century], and you get a good idea of what there is, how quickly it mutates, etc. You also have the time to develop vaccines for any races that might be affected by the new race (including itself- we’re not heartless).

But we underestimated humans.

It was [roughly equivalent to four decades] into our testing of humanity. We picked up a human from his transport and placed him in a containment cell. He had some nutrients with him, and we picked that up too: less we had to feed him later.

But we underestimated the resourcefulness of humans.

Something went wrong- we think it was a door malfunction- and he escaped the cell. He disabled the guards easily (we suspect they were less alert than they should have been) and took their weapons. We locked all hatches, hoping to seal him in the laboratory wing. Unfortunately, he hacked the shipboard computer, gaining control of all systems. He made his way to the bridge, where he took the captain hostage. We offered him riches, technologies beyond human understanding.

But we underestimated the stubbornness of humans.

He was paid us no mind as he wrestled with the controls, as if on some quest. He punched numbers and figures into the console, and mumbled something about ‘being lit on fire’ by a superior. He set the ship down on the other side of the city from where he was picked up and opened the doors. We braced ourselves for a military confrontation, but it seemed like we were outside another human’s abode. He jumped out, carrying the nutrients with him.

We underestimated Domino’s 30-minute or free guarantee.

Humans are weird

An alien’s observations on a human subject:

~ Subject mentions the fact that they are lactose intolerant every time they consume something with dairy in it.

~ Subject’s bones often make crunching noises. Subject assures me that this is somewhat normal.

~ Subject likes to put pictures together, one small irregularly shaped piece at a time, even though the picture is right in front of them.

~ Subject eats frozen food, even though this causes mild distress to their eating orifice.

~ Subject’s sleep schedule changes weekly. They do not understand this either.

~ Subject holds onto obsolete technology, despite not having the required device to even operate this technology.

~ Subject will trip over the same object periodically. They make no attempt to move said object.