Fiddauthor Is Literally So Crazy. Especially With The Context Of It Being The 70s And 80s Too It Just

If I won the lottery I wouldn’t tell anyone, but there would be signs…

decoded a stan twins “fun” fact from book of bill below the cut. SPOILERZ

if you assign the bros secret code to a thru z in order (see figure 1):

then you can decode what ford writes in the journal when he’s thinking about calling stanley (see figure 2, already decoded)

this is devastating right? this is bad and evil and makes you want to curl up and weep? because he misses his brother so dearly and it’s really tragic that they’ve been so angry with each other for so long? Well it gets worse

there’s a bit in the end where stanley cussed out bill. i recognized the code and Chat i wanted this word to be fuck so badly you had no idea. i would’ve been happy with a bullshit. but INSTEAD it’s SAD AND DISMAL.

assuming that ! is y (since it’s not legible from the photo) it says LOVE YA BRO. SHUT THE FUCK UP.

this hurts right? this too is bad? because now you’ve let The Implications sink in. because The Implications are that over decades and decades of hating each other and missing each other and Being Complicated both stanley and stanford REMEMBERED the secret code they made together at 12.

and then you go, duh! stanley got his memory wiped. stanford must have RETAUGHT HIM THE BROS SECRET CODE. WHICH IS ALMOST SADDER AND SWEETER.

DUDE. DUDEEEEEE

they are so brothers. this made me really abnormal. if u can’t tell

Sleep walk animatic

youtube link (don't tag as ship)

nuh uh

You look like the kind of person who licks their finger then use’s it to pick up crumbs off the table and eat them

I have Bluetooth headphones and some times I’ll hide them somewhere in the room and turn the volume up all the way and play never gonna give you up then wait to see if my sister can find them

part two to this but can be read alone

when their relationship first shifted from begrudging to friendly to something else, wade had expected to have to fight for it. he thought it was going to be claws and teeth and knives and guns and goading the wolverine until he finally gave in and admitted his feelings.

he was very wrong. so wrong, in fact, that he was blindsided when logan was the one to make the first move.

they spent all of their time together to the point that they eventually just quit pretending to want to sleep apart. wade abandoned his spot in the bedroom with althea to join logan on the cramped sofa bed. it started innocently enough - they would stay up late watching a movie, and wade would just stay in the living room instead of going to bed. this happened a couple of nights a week (they really spent that much time together) for approximately two weeks before wade just started climbing into the sofa bed at night without pretense. he always made sure to keep to his side, scared to push what he thought was a delicate balance too far and lose it altogether.

wade was almost too cautious of their peculiar relationship. as much as he wanted to jump the wolverine's bones or cuddle up to his chest in the night, he was too afraid of driving the other man away. wade knew he was annoying; of course, he knew that. it was kind of his whole schtick. most people could barely stand him, and he knew that logan's tolerance levels were even lower still. at least, that's what he got from their time in the void.

sure, logan had been much calmer and kinder since he had agreed to stay with wade and al (and mary, possibly the most important household member). and yeah, maybe he smiled fondly when wade ran his mouth incessantly instead of plunging his claws through the merc's throat. and, okay, sometimes wade catches logan looking at him with the softest look in his eyes.

but still. the mercenary wasn't willing to sacrifice the friendship he had with the only person in the world that he would never have to say goodbye to. as long as he didn't fuck this up, that is.

so, you can imagine his surprise when the two had settled into bed one night (after a marathon of real housewives because, for whatever reason, logan was obsessed with the trash tv) and he felt a heavy arm wrap around him.

he had been laying on his side, facing away from logan, with mary curled up by his legs. wade was a fitful sleeper and knew it wouldn't be long before his shifting legs and flailing arms sent the dog to find a more comfortable arrangement, but he loved that she still chose to snuggle up against him while she could. that was normal, though. what wasn't normal was the face pressed into the nape of his neck, or the arm circling his waist, or the hand resting on his chest. wade felt frozen, sure that him moving or speaking would send whatever this was off kilter and result in him sleeping in al's room again.

(side note: when had it become al's room? he lived here too, dammit, and even if he didn't sleep in the room anymore it's still his as much as it is hers.)

(it was al's room.)

thank god he didn't have to sit in his fear for long before logan spoke, his voice rumbling against wade, warm breath fanning over his neck.

"this is okay, right?" that brought wade right back to life. the thought of logan questioning this was enough to kick him into gear. he placed his hand over logan's on his own chest and shifted backwards into the other man's warmth.

"of course it is, peanut." his voice was barely louder than a whisper, perhaps still unwilling to break the moment. "it's perfect."

maybe it wasn't the frenzied fight-turned-makeout-session-turned-fuckfest that wade had imagined it would be, but maybe it was even better. and besides, this was only the beginning. they had forever to figure out the rest.

My friends judge me for staying up late but what do you expect me to do mfs it’s pomegranate season do you know how long that takes

I am Natalie from Gaza. I want to leave and escape the horrors of war here in Gaza. I ask you to help me urgently so that I can escape from the midst of the pain and wounds. Because I no longer have a place after our house was bombed by the Israeli army and we were displaced to the street and with great difficulty we lived in a small tent that is not suitable for living. I ask you to help urgently and to contact me privately so that I can give you my PayPal account to donate. Please help me, please 😢

(THE BOOK OF BILL SPOILERS!!)

Thinking about Bill’s appearance at the end of the book…

[ID: BIll when confronting the Axolotl. He is shown in white silhouette, hovering in space, hovering neutrally. Notably, he has a massive crack running through his body, splitting him into multiple pieces, some of which are coming apart. /end ID]

When confronting the Axolotl, Bill is broken. The Axolotl even notes this: "Shattered, broken, not yet dead."

(Which, side note, makes me think Bill might have been lying about having been "kicked out of Hell," if he didn't actually die in Stan's head.)

[ID: Three pictures of Bill in the Theraprism. The first one shows him holding his hand against the side of his head in a dazed expression, sitting in a chair in a white padded room between a wizard with a clock for a face and Saturn (taken directly from the painting Saturn Devouring His Son). The second is a camera recording of him wearing an orange jumpsuit and kneeling in a cell, surrounded by arts and crafts tools, holding a pair of scissors, and beaming his thoughts frantically into a book. The third shows a mugshot of him staring blankly into the camera, his own name written on coded text below him. In all three images, he has a glowing scar where the cracks were, and is in one piece. /end ID]

When he's shown in the Theraprism, we see a glowing, static-y scar where the cracks were. The scar crosses his entire body (and even crosses to the other side of his eye without affecting it!), but he's actually whole, keeping himself together.

But then...

[ID: Two pictures of Bill from the last pages of the book. In the first one he is facing forward and holding up one finger, his eye reddened, his entire form glitching, and his crack is notably worse than prior, cracking through his eye, multiple smaller pieces drifting away. In the second one he is staring blankly at the viewer, his arms hanging limply, his eye wide and blank, the crack worse than the previous image, with more pieces floating away. /end ID]

In the last few pages, we see the scar is gone and the cracks are back, and even more of him is breaking away, including parts of his eye. It's especially bad in the last image, with even more pieces of him breaking away.

Also noteworthy is that the static texture behind him seems to be the same as the blood sample the US government took from him in the 1940s. He's bleeding.

We know from context that these images are meant to be taken somewhat chronologically. After dying (or nearly dying), Bill seeks out the Axolotl, who sends him to the Theraprism. While there, he writes the journal that he's beaming to us. The staff at the Theraprism catch onto this, and allow him to write out the last few pages, meaning those last few pages are chronologically the last of Bill we see.

This means that, after the events of the show, Bill was shattered... and then, upon entering the Theraprism, started to heal, his body coming together and scars forming... but at some point afterward, he started breaking apart again.

I'd made a post previously about Bill's development, how he views himself as a monster after the Euclidian Disaster, and how he continues to act monstrous afterward (and winds up agonizingly lonely as a result). I didn't really touch on this in the post, but I feel like after inadvertently destroying his home dimension...

Bill never left the denial phase of grief.

I could be wrong on this, but I get the feeling that part of his reason for acting monstrous toward just about everybody is because he sees himself as a monster, because "this is just how I am" is easier to accept than "I really really screwed up."

Bringing this back to his shattering... It's interesting to me that after entering the Theraprism, his body is scarring, which means it is healing. But then, at the end, as he's signing off the book, he's shattered again, and looking even worse than he did when talking to the Axolotl. When talking this over with a friend, they pointed out something that struck me:

Bill does not want to heal.

Healing means having to actually think through what happened. It means having to confront his past, confront destroying his home dimension, confront the harm he caused to others, confront the fact that he did not have to be this way.

And he refuses to do that.

He refuses to heal.