Bruce: Why Do I Feel Like I Live In A Zoo? *gestures Vaguely At His Children Shenaniganing Around Him*

Alrighty! Credit where credit is due; This is @linkeduniverse 's art with a link to the original piece, and this whole thing was originally @triforce-of-mischief 's idea, listing which items belonged to which Link, etc etc. SO! if u like this, a good chunk of the inspiration came from her, so show them some love loll

I also made a spreadsheet- https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1MDGRXQAUfzvoCEysxkM7cV831yj9QvbTyyiS9DX_mCc/

I'm gonna go celebrate NewYear's now jfkldsjfklsds

edit! thank you @crystal-dragon-of-dreams for the extra assistance!! You're the best, ty for all the suggestions! (you're looking at version 2 of this image! here's a link to the old image :D

forever and always insane about the fact that haunting means "heimsuchen" in german which literally translates to "homeseeking". a haunting is a search for a home you can never return to

“NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP!”

Legend freezes, halfway through dressing. Ravio has a nasty habit of breaking into song around him. Normally, that wouldn’t be a problem; satin bowerbird courtship relies more heavily on song. 

“NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOWN!”

It’s just…why does it have to be this song? Where the merchant heard it is a mystery, but now he sings it at every opportunity. 

“NEVER GONNA RUN AROUND—“

“Ravio, I’m busy!”

“AND DESERT YOU!” A pause. Then, in a lower volume, “I thought you liked my singing?”

“Not when I’m trying to get ready! Not while taking a bath! Not when writing a letter! Or any of the other hundred times you’ve decided to annoy me.” Legend is at the end of his feathers on patience. His flockmate seems to take a sadistic interest in the same Hylia-damned song. Over. And over. And over. 

“NEVER GONNA SAY GOODBYE!”

Legend screams into his feathers. 

Ravio continues down the hall, still belting out the song. 

Read it on A03 here! Adding the art I made as well here.

I love Danny as a cryptid energy. Like at first he's just vibing over gotham like a big jellyfish full of stars essentially filter feeding on the corrupted ectoplasm. The bat fam are completely at a loss of what to do. He's not hurting anyone and he's kinda pretty. They just have a giant translucent space whale chilling in the sky. Red hood the first to make contact standing on a roof waving to him.

"Um hey can we like talk?" He shouts at the blob.

Danny comes down and sheds his massive form, turning into a king with too many of just everything, and then just a teenager?

He tilts his head looking at hood, eyes containing multitudes look odd on a kid wearing a galaxy print hoody and jeans (are those jeggings?). He shakes his head and when he opens his eyes again they are normal human blue.

"Yeah," he says, "you look like you might need some help."

"Um," says Hood, "Do you want a cookie? I'm not sure what a good sacrifice is but Zatanna says things valuable to the caster are usually more powerful. And like these are the best. My grandpa makes them."

"Sure," says the kid taking a bite of one, "Man these are good. So I suppose you want to know what's going on with your ecto situation?"

"Ecto?"

"Yeah like the green stuff?"

"The pits? Pit rage?"

"Pits? Is that what the puddles were? The guys around there were not happy when I ate those."

"You ate the Lazarus pits?"

"Yeah kinda tasted like the blue cotton candy? Ecto with lots of negative emotions and magic tend to taste kinda like blue raspberry."

"That's... A lot to process. Are you going to eat the pits...ecto in me?"

"I can but it's what's holding you together. So that would kill you and send your soul to eternal rest."

"Sounds bad."

"It's not but that's not your only option. Obviously I can leave you as you are. I'm guessing you get outbursts where the negative emotions take over?"

"Pit rage yeah"

"So there's that. Or I can replace the bad ecto with good that would make you a Half like me. Half human - Half Ghost. Pros include some superpowers, at minimum flight, invisibility and intangibility, eternal life, and access to the infinite realms. Cons include an awkward adjustment phase, difficulty controlling your emotions, and you would be locked out of your eternity of choice. Once you're a ghost you're a ghost forever."

"That's a lot to consider."

"Yeppers"

"Can I take a bit to consider?"

"Absolutely. My name is Danny Phantom. If you yell that out I should be able to hear you from anywhere in the multiverse. I'm going to be here for a couple of years your time anyway cleaning up your ecto sphere. Looks like the entire universe's bad ecto all coagulates over this city so I'll just be floating around. Feel free to tell whatever authority you want that they can ask to talk to me. I won't stop and none of you can make me but I can explain what I'm doing and it's good for the universe as a whole."

"Okay, um thanks. Do you want another cookie for the road?"

"Sure! Have a good one dude!"

"Erm... You too?"

Jason had a lot to think about.

Wade cannot handle all that

Rich pregnant socialite: So we went to this clinic and let them manipulate our genes so we're 100% sure our child won't have any disease, he will have my hair and his father eyes and so much things we did for him! And you Bruce ?

Brucie: Found em in the trash. Except Tim, he found me in the trash.

Hitman vibes

Because Danny is half dead, he has some serious doom and gloom vibes without trying.

He smiles and wishes you a good day? Holy shit this kid just said this is my last day holy fuck.

Give you hot chocolate? Is this kid implying that this is the last warmth I'll ever feel?

It boils down to this; Danny had Hitman Vibes.

This is both hilarious and concerning, especially when people try to contract him to perform assassinations. He has gotten so many people arrested with that shit.

Guys. Guys. Calculating tips. Just. Look at your bill. And move the decimal point one step left. That’s ten percent. Double that number. Now it’s twenty percent.

$100.00 bill? $10.000. Ten dollars. Double it. Twenty dollars. That’s a 20% tip.

$67.50? Now it’s $6.750. $6.75? Might as well be $7. Double it. Roughly $14. You’re not going to miss the change.

Please. I failed math three times