woodsywander

Latest Posts by woodsywander

Op this is the first thing that has made me actually laugh out loud in at least a month

idk if i told the full story on here but i signed up for a research study where they were testing a new opioid, and it was supposed to be up to 5 injections increasing the dose to see what people could tolerate

i got the first dose and almost immediately fainted. they had to call in a whole medical team and it was a huge fucking deal

i was kicked out of the study and got a phone call later where they were supposed to tell me what the drug was, so i could avoid it in the future. they told me it was saline water. a placebo. i fainted from the placebo effect.

anyway, it's been a few months and i just got an email from the same department asking me to be a research participant in a new study: testing the effects of open-label placebo.

open label placebo is when the subjects and the researchers all know it's a placebo. they're testing the power of my mind. my power to imagine anything.

i like to think that they chose me for this specifically based on their past experience with me. "get the guy who fainted like a little bitch boy from saline water." anyway i just submitted all my info and i'm looking forward to getting started.

This is exactly how I handle all my stress and it works really well. Thanks for the advice

just remember, tense your shoulders, grit your teeth, take rapid shallow breaths and say to yourself ”oh shit, oh fuck, this is all my fault”

defying the odds with mama

I mean, it does burn calories but not enough to combat my stress-eating

So glad I don't live in Utah anymore, but I'm proud of SLC for fighting back (love Erin Mendenhall).

:-)

Throwback to that time I cursed ye

My rommates are my besties so I get to have this 🥰

they should invent a wormhole in my bedroom where i could walk through it and my best friend is on the other side and we can hang out

at a tribal finance conference listening to a quileute tribal council member talk about how companies have bought every house in forks, wa because it’s a tourist destination so they can’t hire people to work for the tribe

anyway fuck stephenie meyer for profiting so intensely off of racist stereotypes of quilteutes and all native people while never contributing a dime to help them solve the problems she caused!

if you have the ability, you can donate to their move to higher ground fund here: https://mthg.org

Oh my gods i forgot that part

Today's high schoolers romanticizing 2016 as if there weren't the clown incidents

-Anaïs Nin, 1939

"Your car's extended warranty is --"

My car is older than me dude

I love scam calls that are easily verifiably false. “Your mortgage is about to default.” Cool 👍 I don’t have one of those

Ok so my homework is done, and I have earned my degree. Why am I crying now.

Summer is the worst. I hate being sweaty and nauseous for an entire season

Whose idea was finals week? Their name needs to go on my gravestone. Why is this all happening in the same week??

Yes, it does :)

My coworker came into my office this week and opened my blinds because I "look like a vampire" and then left.

hey man is it cool if i bring my pet airpod. no worries if not

Rebog

what i've been up to the past 20 minutes

The Locked Tomb Series Official Reading Order:

- The Iliad

- The Bible

- The Apocryphal Book of Judith

- Dante's Inferno and Paradise Lost

- Don Quixote

- Annabelle Lee by Edgar Allan Poe

- Revolutionary Girl Utena

- Homestuck

- Umineko

- Gideon the Ninth

- The Mysterious Study of Doctor Sex

- Lolita

- Harrow the Ninth

- Harrow the Ninth Again

- The Barbie Movie

- As Yet Unsent

- Nona the Ninth