The Scar You Left Behind

Amgst are superior

Hey doll!

Hope you are doing well! I really enjoyed my match up with Sanzu! (Even thought up of a self indulgent one shot about it for myself (not posting it)! Thank you for such an amazing match up and idea for that to be possible!)

I've seen from your post that you want some requests so I thought I would send you one!

If I could please request a Hanma X reader angst? Maybe with how Kisaki disliked that Hanma was becoming less available to help with his plans, and he thinks you're the reason for that. And so you have to be taken care of? Preferably reader death but you can decide ultimately what happens. After all, this is your writing and you need to be comfortable.

Don't feel like you have to push yourself to accept this request. I understand how this is not everyone's cup of tea and not everyone likes writing angst to this level.

If this makes you uncomfortable or you don't want to write it, please feel free to just ignore this. I just feel like Hanma angst 😅

Please take care of yourself and remember you are loved! ❤️ Thank you for even reading this ask! ❤️

A/N: Waa thank you very much for your kindness! this is my first time for angst so I'm pretty nervous for this one.(y'all if you're an angst writer maybe you could give me tips on how to do better)

TW: mentions of death, murder(?)

A nuisance. That's what you were to kisaki. A nuisance to his plans. you were always taking up hanma's time. And oh how he despised you for that he wanted you dead, and he will make sure that he has you dead. unbeknowist to you the male has already started planning for your own death.

At a summer morning hanma recieved a call from you and before the phone could make it known he already picked it up.

"Hello?" he asked

"Hanma! hello! it is I your most beloved lover!" you exclaimed. a chuckle was heard from your phone making you smile. 'I managed to make him laugh!' you thought

"Ah! right anyways I was thinking if you wanted to go on a date with me. you see I found this new restaurantand thought we could go check it out together and make it a date."

He laughed glad you were still as loving as you were before

"Sure" he answered

"Really? yay! then see you at my home 1pm bye!" and with that you hang up.

already heading towards your apartment, he heard kisaki's voice now normally he wouldn't interfere wanting it to be a surprise but when he heard him saying your name curiosity took over him. peeking over he saw kisaki and a man he doesn't know talking.

"As I said you'll strike y/n when they're alone got that?" he said

"Loud and clear boss" he answered while snickering

He was surprised to say the least. y/n was going to be killed. and what's worst was that they were bound to be killed by the person who made his life bearable to live in. walking towards you home he was troubled. who would he choose to betray? kisaki, who made his life a circus or y/n whom he fell in love with. either way he knew whatever choice he made it would result in a great amount of loss. arriving to your apartment he ringed the doorbell which immediately got a response. kicking your door open you smiling when you saw your boyfriend.

"Let's go!" you said and hooked you arm with his

snapped out of his thought, he looked at you and smiled before nodding

"So, where is this new restaurant you're saying? he asked

"it's just over there" you said pointing to the left

it was a walking distance from your apartment. arriving the restaurant you were greeted by the sound of bells signaling your entrance.

"Welcome" the waitress said

taking both of your orders, she smiled before leaving you two alone. and once again hanma was lost in thought and you being his lover, knew it was unusual. after all hanma was never quiet. worried you called him

"Hanma?"

he looked up to you to see your worried. quickly erasing the thought, he smiled and went back to his usual self which in a sense, comforted you. smiling, you told him about the latest gossips in your school while he listened with a smile

'if you learned your fate, would you be smiling like you are now' he wondered

leaving the restaurant after gladly eating the meal, you held his hand as he walked you home.

"Y/n" he called

you looked at him with a smile, wondering what he was gonna say.

"no. nevermind" he said unable to tell you

"I see.." you responded

Arriving your apartment, the both of you said your goodbyes to each other. that night you slept peacefully however hanma couldn't. daybreak arrived and he finally made up his mind. picking up his phone,, he called you hoping you'd pick it up.

"hello?" you asked

"ah y/n, can we meet up at a park?" he said trying his best not to let out a sob

"Hm? sure! what time?" you asked

Ah, how innocent he thought

"Now would be preferable" he answered

"Now? ok!" you answered already getting out

Arriving the park, you saw him sitting on a bench. smiling you approached him only to frown when you saw his bloodshot eyes. worried, you cupped his face and asked

"what's wrong?" you asked worry laced in your tone

"Y/n, you know I love you, right?" he asked

"Yes?" you answered confused as to why the sudden question

"You love me too, right y/n?" he asked another peculiar question

"Uh yes?" you answered

As if your answer was a trigger, a knife was plunged in your chest. your eyes widened as you cough out blood. it hurts you thought. but what hurted you more was because the one that stabbed you, was hanma. you looked at him with a questioning expression but gave him a smile before you finally passed out.

"I love you y/n. and if you were bound to die anyways, I'd prefer it'd be me that would kill you" he said before pulling the knife out.

his eyes was lifeless. kneeling down, he touched your body. it was cold, there was no pulse and the bleeding wouldn't stop. he was sure you were dead now. He was smiling, why was he smiling? he wanted to scream, to cry yet why can't I do it?

I loved y/n I really do but maybe we met at the wrong life time. maybe in another life we could be happy we could have children, maybe we could do all the things you want to. but that's just in another life.

I swear if this story does not end in diluc x (name)/thoma x (name)

CHAPTER TEN || COWBOY LIKE ME

SYPNOSIS (of chapter). in which today is a day for a beautiful wedding, with secrets and fears hidden underneath the naked eye.

SYPNOSIS (of series). breaking up with your first love was heartbreaking, but not as heartbreaking as getting invited to his wedding after years of not seeing him. that is, until things seem to be easier when you encounter a certain guest, who could end up being more than just a blooming friend to you.

CHARACTERS. kamisato ayato and diluc ragnvindr (w/ gn!reader)

CONTENT. angst/fluff/comfort(?), modern au, slight physical violence (slap), mentions of family problems, hints of murder, and lots of crying and anxiousness

PENPALS. @scaraslover @saving-for-xiao @dawgimsohot @kazu-topia @chiruru @aqualesha @renamichii @mrkamisato @shenhesl0ver @serami00 @serenareiss @hiqhkey @emperatris-rinaka @bystander36 @irisxiel @ladycoleigh @034ven @dear-dairiess @owozi8 @hadesaedes @chiro-chiro-kun @hersscherofyatta @mariusvonhangme @yuzuricebun @hoshikistarlette @solaaresque @crowbird @lordbugs @flowersforayato @headintheclouddd @estelwrld @giyusimpsassemble @irethepotatosblog @moonlightaangel @alice0blog @shotosbrainrot @sniffoat @chihawari @mxsomn @kuni-kuzushii @jiminscarmex @mitsukii14 @nejibot @ylimeprive @sachispet @loreleis-world @sn-owo @starforecasts @someonetookmynamelmao @ceylestia @koshiisu @ymikkos @reallysporadicarcade @elychee @rion-s @denkineptune @franini @sophisticatedleslie @thedivinepriestress @smashsubs @httpmitsuya @bl6o6dy @cottonkendi (please visit this post if you'd like to be tagged!)

WORD COUNT. 6.2k words

LINKS. EVERMORE MASTERLIST \ MAIN MASTERLIST \ EVERMORE SURVEY (come visit if you’d like to ask questions that i’ll answer by the time this series ends !)

POST-SCRIPT. 6 more chapters before evermore reaches its end !! i'm very excited to work on the next chapters as they're the ones i'm excited to write <33 id also like to shoutout to that one anon whose birthday is today, this is my gift to you, anon <33 !!

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make sure to read the full thing before looking at reblogs and replies to prevent yourself from getting spoiled !!

The day of the wedding has finally come.

It’s strange, you admit. After you and Ayato talked it out together properly yesterday, the lingering thoughts about the past was.. Quiet for the first time. It’s a good thing of course, but it’s just so new to you.

Zhongli could tell something good happened to you from just the way you’re acting today.

“Good morning to you, ( Name ).” He greeted you from his seat as he poured hot tea on his cup. “I take it that you slept well?”

You hummed happily in response, sitting down across the man with a cup of your drink. “I did. Remember when I went to visit the couple because of the wedding gift?” 

Zhongli nodded in response, causing you to add, “Ayato and I talked it out. We both settled the situation and decided that it’s fair that we go our separate ways. I’m glad we properly made up, if it weren’t for you persuading me to go up there, I would’ve not been able to talk to Ayato at all for the next few days.” 

“That’s good, I’m happy you finally made up with Mr. Kamisato.” Zhongli comments with a proud smile. It was definitely difficult to convince you to come visit the wedding couple to give them their gifts because of the fact you’re afraid of bothering them and not wanting to see Ayato, so he was glad to hear it went well for you just like he hoped it would be. “Why don’t we go to a place to celebrate before the wedding? I was meaning to visit a place that my friend’s been insisting on visiting and I think it’d be great if I could tag you along with Venti.” 

Seeing how you have nothing else to do for the rest of the day before the wedding, you don’t see why you shouldn’t refuse his offer – and besides, it’s been a few days since you’ve spent time with your dear friend. “I’d love to go!” 

–

You learned that Zhongli’s dear friend certainly knows where alcohol is. 

Unlike before when you three got lost around the city thanks to Venti, your journey to Angel’s Share was nothing but a breeze. The young man was delighted to tell you everything about the place as you’re on your way there. 

“It’s definitely a cool place! Not only do they sell the finest wines Mondstadt has to offer, they also sell lots of delicious foods and nonalcoholic beverages, you’ll love it!” Venit said enthusiastically. “I recommend you trying out Dandelion Wine or their Misty Garden – Zhongli is a fan of that one.” 

You look at Zhongli in surprise. “You went there before?” 

He nodded with a smile. “Yes I have. Though, it was perhaps a few years since I last visited.” He clarified. 

“We’re here!” Venti spoke, causing you to stop your tracks and look at the location that’s on your left, only for your eyes to widen at the sight of the name of the place. Angel’s Share…? Isn’t that where…?

“Come, come! I want to introduce you to someone before we go sit somewhere.” He spoke, dragging you and Zhongli towards the entrance.

As the three of you enter Angel’s Share, Venti takes you both to the bar area nearby, and your eyes widen at the sight of a certain familiar man who’s serving drinks for the servers to snatch away and serve it to the customers. 

It was only when you’re now face to face with him when the bartender realizes your presence.

“...”

“...”

“...Mr. – I mean, Diluc.” You spoke. 

“...( Name )...” Diluc greeted you back, surprised as well. “I didn’t know you’d be visiting here today, I thought the wedding was today?” 

“Ah, the wedding will start in a few hours, so we decided to visit here before getting ready.” You respond. “...Will you be there too?” 

He nodded. “Mr. Kamisato was delighted that everyone was pleased with the drinks I’ve served, so he and his fiancée were happy to invite me to the wedding and reception.” 

Your eyes brighten, now looking forward to the wedding more than ever. “That’s good! I’ll see you there then!” 

“I’ll see you there as well,” Diluc then looks at where Zhongli and Venti are. “It’s nice to see you again, Mr. Zhongli…. Venti.” 

“Took you long enough to realize we exist!” Venti spoke with a laugh. “We’ll be going to our table now, we better expect to see your finest wine on the table!”

“Only if you pay up.” Diluc narrows his eyes. “Might I remind you about your bill from last night?” 

The younger man pretends to not hear any word the bartender was saying, giggling as he takes your arm and walks to the nearest empty table with Zhongli following.

As the three of you shared a conversation while waiting for your orders to be served, you couldn’t help but steal some glances towards Diluc nearby, who you’d sometimes caught glancing at your direction too before you quickly looked away in embarrassment. 

You’d be lying if you said you’re not looking forward to talking to him during the reception. Could you blame yourself? There was still so much to talk about with the man, who certainly knows more than what meets the eye, but unfortunately your long conversation had to be stopped due to the venue being over already. 

Your small glances towards each other did not go unnoticed by a certain nosy young man. 

“So,” Venti suddenly spoke with a smug look on his face. “Care to tell us the juicy details between you and Mr. Diluc over there?” 

Your mouth opens in surprise, your glances towards the bartender finally stop. “E-Excuse me?” 

“Oh, I meant that I was wondering if you could tell us about you and that guy over there. I honestly didn’t expect you two to become friends because of the shop back then! I can’t help but feel curious since that man rarely makes friends.” Venti clarifies quickly with a giggle. 

You hesitantly look down at the table, fingers tapping in deep thought. “Well… I could say the both of us kept seeing each other by accident a few times after that. We got to know each other during the joint bachelor party so I guess we’re considered friends now.” You explained shyly.

“No way! Diluc tells you about himself?!” Venti exclaims. “What has this world turned into?!”

You couldn’t help but laugh at his exaggeration. “I wouldn’t exactly say that. We don’t tell each other our personal lives, just our preferences and such.” 

“Tell us more! I’m dying to know if it’s actually true that he despises alcohol–”

“Here are your orders!” The waiter interrupted the conversation, serving all of your meals from the tray as you thank the waiter internally for saving yourself from revealing too much. “Enjoy your meals.” 

“Thank you, good sir!” Venti cheerfully replied, watching the waiter walk away before looking at you. “Now, what did we talk about again?”

Before you could speak, Zhongli beat you to it. “We were talking about where to go next when we’re able to hang out again next time.” Thank you Zhongli! 

Thankfully, Venti fell for it. “Ah, really…? Oh well, I was thinking about you guys visiting my place next time so I could introduce you to Dvalin – He’s a cute bird of mine, ehe!”

By the time you finished your meal while continuing your conversation with Venti and Zhongli, the three of you agreed to call it a day given that you and Zhongli only have two hours to get ready before the wedding, much to Venti’s disappointment, wanting to talk more with you two. 

“Aww it’s a shame that we have to end this way, we still have so much to talk about!” The young man pouted, watching as the two of you started packing your things once you settled your bill. “I hope we get to meet up again once you two are done with that wedding fiasco.” 

You nodded in agreement. “I hope so too, we’ll see what we can do. See you next time, Venti!” 

As you and Zhongli walk away towards the exit of the establishment, you slowly find yourself gazing towards where Diluc is, who notices you’re leaving. Once your eyes contacted each other, you gave the bartender an acknowledged nod with a smile, causing Diluc to nod back. 

And then you left the establishment, smiling to yourself at the thought of coming back to that pleasant place.

—

“Welcome, welcome! Feel free to explore the venue for a bit while waiting for the wedding ceremony to start.” One of the staff greeted you as you and Zhongli stepped foot into the wedding venue, wearing your finest outfits that won’t outshine the wedding couple as it should be.

People weren’t lying when they said Goth Grand Hotel has the largest venue in all of Mondstadt, and whoever arranged the place did an amazing job making a huge empty room into a place that’s perfect for a wedding, with some intricate designs and fabrics draped on the ceilings as well as music playing in the background that originates from Inazuma, and flower arrangements with some colors around the room that symbolizes Mondstadt. The whole wedding is entirely filled with Inazuma and Mondstadt combined in a good way. 

“I’m impressed with this place.” Zhongli comments with a hum, the two of you walking around the area. “Goth Grand Hotel has outdone themselves with the venue for sure.” 

You smile in amusement at the sight of Zhongli’s way of being in awe. The way his eyes sparkle as he looks around his surroundings with his eyes is enough for you to know just how impressed he is. 

“I agree. It feels like you’re not in a hotel anymore.” You replied, entering the aisle. You find yourself letting out a sad sigh when you haven’t seen a familiar red-haired man around. You were looking forward to having a quick chat with him before the ceremony starts, but talking to your other friends will just have to do. 

Your slumped look didn’t go unnoticed by Zhongli, who can’t help but glance at you in curiosity. 

Are they thinking about that red-haired man perhaps? He thought to himself in amusement. It seems Venti wasn’t the only one who noticed your quick glances and interactions with your new friend.

It took perhaps thirty minutes chatting with your other friends who managed to arrive early before you and Zhongli decided to come to your seats as soon as it was announced the wedding would come shortly. 

A few seconds turned to minutes, you thought there was nothing wrong as far as you know. A few minutes turned to thirty minutes, and you thought there’s just a minor inconvenience as the music begins. Thirty minutes turned into an hour, and you knew something was wrong with Chisato, not when Ayato was already standing in his position waiting for the bride to come. 

The bride never came. 

Today is going to be a lovely day, Chisato thought with a small smile. 

After so many years of anticipation and dread, the day of the wedding has finally arrived. The woman was prepared for this moment ever since her father deemed it so, and she can guarantee that she’ll try her best for the occasion.

The woman starts the day off with breakfast served in her suite by the hotel staff. She can tell her father’s the one who ordered them to serve it given that her breakfast today is her favorite Inazuma dishes, something that she hasn’t eaten for the past week. 

It’s a shame that she can’t spend such breakfast with her soon-to-be-husband, who’s now in another suite in order for the couple to not see each other before the wedding, but nevertheless, it was fine since she’ll see him later on and eat dinner with him at the reception. Now that she thinks about it, it’s quite silent and lonely here..

Perhaps listening to her favorite songs won’t hurt a bit while eating breakfast.

She instantly grabs her phone nearby and plays her playlist before grabbing her schedule as she dines in on her breakfast.

First, she has a lot of free time for the next two hours – which she’ll use to take a stroll through the garden, have some spa, check with her wedding planner and Thoma regarding the preparations of the wedding, then afterwards she can proceed to the bridal room and start getting ready for the wedding at last. 

Simple and lovely, just the way she likes it. She can’t think of anything that can make this day go wrong,

By the time she finishes her breakfast, she washes the dishes off by the kitchen sink and goes to her room to change her attire. 

As the woman strolls around the garden happily, she admires the flowers and plants displayed. The place is truly one of the things she likes about the Grand Goth Hotel, and the pictures certainly didn’t give enough justice for how ethereal the garden looked. 

She leans towards one of Mondstadt’s special flowers – windwheel asters are what they called – and looks at one of them in fascination. They really do spin!

Chisato could recall talking to Thoma about Mondstadt before the trip. The man was surely fond of his hometown from how he has so many things to talk about the lands, and one of those things are particularly windwheel asters. 

Next to the plentiful flowers are cecilias, the one she personally chose for her bouquet besides her favorite ones that have been sent straight from Inazuma, and just as Thoma said, they’re as lovely as “true love”, a quote he recited as a reference of a certain song written by Mondstadt’s most famous idol, Barbara.

Everywhere Chisato goes, her surroundings are filled with various flowers hailed from Mondstadt and even from certain neighboring lands. 

It would be lovely if she could have a garden as similar as this for her new home that she and Ayato will stay in after the wedding, then maybe she can have a safe haven to come to whenever she wants to clear her mind. 

If she’s lucky enough, maybe said safe haven would be enough to clear some of her guilt off for not working hard enough to stop her wedding for you and Ayato.

It still hurts, knowing that it took her this long to realize that she was right about this wedding being a mistake from the start. Not only is she getting married to someone who loves someone else and had the audacity to act so loving to him with the person he loves around, but was also totally clueless that her fiance was suffering from something she could’ve tried her best to prevent. 

She knew what it was like to lose someone she loves dearly – though her experience was much different unlike Ayato’s, whereas his someone is still alive – and it made everything worse for her knowing that she’s the reason that he’s going through it. 

That’s why she feels like the best thing she can do for you, Ayato, and herself is to keep everything under wraps. Which leads her to be… more conscious about herself and those around her. 

The feeling as if everyone’s eyes are on Chisato began to dawn on the woman, causing her posture to stiffen. Everyone would be disappointed, especially those who never understood the sacrifices of arranged marriages, they’d call her a snake for stealing someone’s man and feel sad for Ayato’s tragic love life, or call Ayato a shameless man for inviting the person he still loves to the wedding and they’d pity Chisato. 

Either way, the result would be too dire should anyone find out about this. 

It scares her, knowing there’s nothing she could do if this spreads like wildfire. She was just following her father’s orders, he didn’t know any better. She thought Ayato was alright with it too since he accepted it–

With a shaky breath, Chisato decides to go back inside from the garden that she no longer enjoys, her thoughts flooding with what-ifs and overwhelming guilt as she tries to reassure herself that the feeling of being watched by everyone is nothing but in her head. It’s okay, they’re not looking at me. They’re just going about their day, no one knows.

She feels sick when she makes eye-contact with a few passerbys while heading inside, not helping her reassurances at all.

She hopes a long spa session with her friends can make her feel better. 

If it weren’t for her dear friends, she would’ve canceled her spa appointment and stayed in her suite for the next hour until she visits her wedding planner and Thoma. 

“This is truly divine, Chisato.” Hanachirusato, one of the bridesmaids, commented. “Both the Kamisato family and your family are truly generous – not only did you provide free trips to Mondstadt for everyone, you also gave us a free spa treatment!” 

Chisato shyly laughed. “You’re too kind, Hana… It’s the least I can do for you guys since you’ve been here for me since college.” 

“You being our friend is enough. If anything, us treating you out to shopping and eating in Good Hunter yesterday isn’t enough to show us our gratitude.” Sakuya chimes. “By the way, I’ve checked the flowers that you’ll be carrying, and thankfully they’re all well.” 

“That’s good to hear, I was worried about that last night before I went to sleep. But yesterday was enough for me, I’ve had lots of fun thanks to you guys.” The bride replies quietly.

“Are you excited for the wedding later?” Aoi asks curiously.

“Of course, I am.” Chisato responded. “I’m just nervous… But I believe that everything will go well thanks to Ayato’s best man and Asagiri.”

“Aww, you’re too sweet, Chisato! And no worries, the wedding is almost done with the venue, we just need a few more roundchecks with Thoma and check on the guests before the wedding starts – I also made sure your photographer arrived early to take pictures before the reception.” Asagiri said. 

“I already feel relieved from just hearing that, thank you again Asagiri.” 

“By the way, speaking of guests… Consider me curious, but who was that person you were talking to during the bachelor party, Chisato?” Fushizome asks curiously.

Chisato was taken back by surprise. “Which person?”

“You know, the one who you were talking to when you walked back to the party from the bathroom! From what I remember, they have ( Hair Color ) and a cute outfit.” 

The woman’s breath hitches. 

They now know you. 

She couldn’t help but feel scared, what if they realized you’re Ayato’s ex? What would they do if they found out about your situation? Or worse, what if they think Chisato forced Ayato to marry her knowing about you–?!

“Ma’am, try to relax.” Chisato’s thoughts were cut off by the hushed tone of her masseuse, causing the bride to blink a few times and wake up in reality.

“Chisato..? Are you okay?” One of the bridesmaids asked in concern.

“..” Chisato lets out a deep breath before smiling once again. “Ah, I’m alright, sorry. I was dozing off..” 

“Again..? Are you thinking about the wedding?” 

“Yeah,” The bride lets out a fake laugh. “I’m alright, don’t worry about me. I was just recalling everything I needed to do for the wedding.”

The women look at each other with a flash of concern for Chisato before giving in to her reassurance. “..If you insist, Chisato.” 

By then, everything was a blur. 

The discussion between Thoma and the wedding planner in her suite went as smoothly as Chisato hoped, it was only until they left the room when the woman encountered a surprise visitor.

“Father? What brings you here?” The bride exclaims in surprise, not expecting to see her father visiting her. 

“Well I’ve come to visit my sweet little girl before she goes to the wedding! Is it wrong of me to visit you?” 

Chisato shakes her head, opening the door wide for him to enter. “O-Of course not, father. Please come in.” 

As Shinsuke enters the room, the woman instantly rushes over to the kitchen after closing the door shut, preparing her father’s favorite tea. 

He then decides to speak. “I’m quite proud of you, sweetheart. I hope you and Ayato will have a prosperous marriage as I hoped it would be. Carrying both the Hiiragi and Kamisato titles is no easy feat, so I hope you’re ready for it all once the wedding is over.” 

“I’m more than ready, father.” She responded, walking over towards her father with the tea set. It was fortunate the man didn’t notice the way her hands started shaking. “You’ve prepared me for it.” 

Prepared, that’s what Shinsuke thought he was. Prepared for anything, prepared for dangers to come, prepared for dealing with someone who threatens his status, prepared for removing evidence, prepared for everything, everywhere.

Prepared for all except having a daughter. 

Even though her father didn’t say anything, Chisato knew he despised the fact that he only has a daughter who will inherit everything in the Hiiragi business instead of a son. She appreciated his efforts in hiding it to not hurt her feelings – a sign that he at least cares about her – but it hurts to see the way his jaws sometimes clench at the sight of her. 

Perhaps one of the reasons why she didn’t exactly protest against the marriage back then was because of the fact it could make her father proud of her for once. 

Even if she won medals in school, knew every single thing she needed to know to handle a business,  became top 1 in her classes, won many achievements, and a truly breadwinner that’s worth being proud of by parents overall, the bride knew it wasn’t enough for her father. Not when he wanted a boy instead of a girl as his child and for his wife to come back from the dead after dying from childbirth. 

It was only when she learned that he has other ways in dealing with people who oppose him that she lost all the admiration she had for her father and didn’t bother to try and get his attention, who’s nothing but a corrupted prick. All that’s left are fear and misery. 

“Of course, I didn’t raise you well for nothing, dear.” Shinsuke responded with a laugh, bringing up the cup to his lips before taking a sip. “That’s why I better expect nothing to go wrong with the wedding and between you and Ayato.” 

Chisato feels her heart sinking, slowly realizing that the elder man has another reason for visiting here. “Nothing’s going on that should concern you, father. So you don’t have to–”

“Don’t bother lying to me, Chisato.” 

…

What?

Chisato felt her heart drop. Does he know about the bachelor party? Did he realize who you are? What will he do to you and Ayato if he does–!

The woman tries to contain her smile, keeping her act together. “Father, what do you mean? I’m telling you the tru–”

“Do you happen to know ( Name ) ( Last Name )?” 

Chisato felt her breath hitch, trying not to look shocked. “..Wh..What about them… Father?” She breathed out, trying not to panic. How did he find out about you? Did he manage to catch you with Ayato? Or was there someone who managed to tell him about your relationship with him–?!

“I’m disappointed in you, Hiiragi Chisato.” She tenses up from the way he brought up her full name. “What did I tell you about not showing vulnerability for this wedding?! What if that vile person makes rumors about how you’re miserable in this marriage?!” 

Oh thank Celestia..

“I.. I’m sorry, father. I just couldn’t help it, I was crying out of excitement that I’m getting married to th-the man I love and I didn’t notice ( Name ) until it was too late – b-but I can reassure you father, they certainly won’t do such a thing! I promise! Please don’t do anything to them!” She begged, hoping her acting was enough to convince her foolish father. 

“I won’t risk it.” Shinsuke hissed. “It’s best if we kick them out now before they try to ruin this damned wedding by spreading rumors!” 

Chisato shook her head in dismay. “Please don’t, father! I know them well enough, they haven’t spoken about this to anyone–”

“HOW DARE YOU QUESTION ME!?” Chisato shrieks when she feels her father slap her face, causing her to instantly back away in fear. “Have you forgotten who raised you? Who fed you? Who gave you all of this,” He gestures around the suite, “and who helped you get to where you are now?! You’re getting married to one of the most powerful and richest men in Inazuma and it's all thanks to me!” 

The woman hyperventilates in panic, shocked from her father’s sudden violence. Never did he lay a hand on her violently for all her life – was it because she kept protesting instead of staying silent and playing along? 

Realizing his actions, Shinsuke lets out a huff. “I will go get ready for the wedding. If I ever hear a word from everyone about you and Ayato negatively, I will do whatever I want with that disgraceful friend of yours.” 

She watched in fear as he walked away towards the exit, her hand still on top of where he slapped her face.

By the time he left, she broke down in tears. 

“I’m sorry ( Name )..” She whispered. “I don’t know if I’ve done enough..” Just like how she doesn’t know if she’s done enough for her and her ex lover, Kamaji. 

– 

Chisato felt suffocated with her wedding dress. 

“You look absolutely gorgeous, Chisato!” Nana cooed as she and the other ladies stared at Chisato’s stunning figure in awe, not noticing the way the woman looked miserable. “If Kamisato didn’t fall in love with you before, he’ll surely fall in love with you now!” 

Just as Chisato wished, she’s wearing a wedding dress that those such as Mondstadt would wear on their weddings instead of a traditional wedding dress that Inazuma women would wear. The wedding dress was slim, enough to hug her figures in a comfortable way, with designs that her stylist made by hand herself that resembles her homeland, Inazuma. There was also a petal train by the end of her dress, with designs of sakura petals instead of the ordinary flower petals. 

She would’ve felt emotional on how gorgeous she truly looked, if it weren’t for the fact that her mind is elsewhere. 

“...Thanks, ladies.” She whispered, a strain smile appeared on her face. “I couldn’t have done this all without you guys, thanks again for being my bridesmaids and maid of honor.” 

“It’s no problem, Chisato. We’re truly happy for you, I wish you a happy marriage with Kamisato Ayato.” Asagiri responds, fixing Chisato’s dress a little bit before gesturing to one of the stylists in the room to put the veil on the bride. 

The bride shuffles a bit, adjusting the dress that’s suffocating her so much– or was it just her imagination? 

Hanachirusato lets out a dreamy sigh. “Ah, I can’t wait for you to come out of the entrance and walk through the aisle, you’d certainly look ethereal, people would admire you, adore you, and even envy you–”

Chisato couldn’t help but deafen Hanachirusato’s words, her palms begin to sweat as she tries not to give in to the urge to get rid of her dress from how suffocating it is. 

“What would Ayato think when he sees his beautiful bride?” Aoi asks aloud in curiosity. 

The bridesmaid’s question only made her feel even more suffocated. He’ll only wish that ( Name )’s the one who’s marrying him instead of me.. 

She slowly remembers what Shinsuke told her about you. 

The bride lets out a shaky breath. 

“I apologize, I need to go to the bathroom alone.” The bride spoke before walking towards the bathroom without letting anyone talk. 

Seeing how there’s nothing wrong with it, the bridesmaids decided to continue with their finishing touches on their outfits while waiting for Chisato.

It felt a little strange to hear nothing from Chisato in the bathroom. As far as anyone knows, this hotel was loud enough for at least the sounds of the water to be heard, signaling that there’s someone in there, so hearing nothing is strange. But since it was simply none of their concern yet, everyone decided to continue their day. 

It wasn’t until a long time had passed when the bridesmaids realized there was something wrong. 

“Chisato, are you alright?” Fushizome asks as she knocks on the bathroom door. “What happened? Do you need our hel–” 

“I’m sorry, I don’t think I want to continue the wedding.” The bride spoke as she continued to kneel down against the wall in the bathroom, crying softly in fear for her future and in fear for what her father will do to you and Ayato. “This.. All of this is wrong.” 

Everyone’s eyes widened from her sudden decision. “What do you mean? You didn’t do anything wrong, Chisato, you’re just nervous–”

“No, no. You don’t understand!” Chisato spoke hysterically, not caring about the fact that her makeup is now getting ruined from her tears. “Please just.. Just leave me alone!” 

“But Chisato, how can we leave you alone? We’re worried for you!” It’s for your own good, Chisato thought, breath shaking. If my father can go after anyone like ( Name ), my newest friend, then he can go after you guys too. “I can’t… I can’t talk about it…” 

“Please Chisato, let us in!” 

“Just leave me alone!” Just leave me alone, so father won’t hurt anyone I care, so he won’t hurt anyone’s lives like what he did Ayato and ( Name ) and others who were affected by him–

“Chisato?”

Her thoughts stopped when she heard his voice. 

“...” She slowly looks up at the door. “...Ayato?” 

“Yes, it’s me.” Ayato confirms, knocking on the bathroom door softly. “Care to let me in?” 

Chisato hesitates, thinking deeply for a while before standing up from the cold floor and placing her hand on the doorknob. 

With a deep breath, the bride opens the door slightly, enough for Ayato to see her and for the other people in the room to not see her. 

“...Come.” 

As soon as the groom steps foot to the bathroom, Chisato immediately closes the door, her shoulders slumped. 

The two of them stayed silent. It’s a habit between the two of them to stay silent with one another sometimes, especially at parties whereas they’d retreat to a secluded place and enjoy the peacefulness with no words exchanged. 

This time, they retreat to a secluded place for a different reason. 

 “I’m.. sorry.” She apologized softly, interrupting the silence. “I.. I know what happened between you and ( Name ). I feel ashamed that I didn’t even try hard enough–”

“You did more than enough.” Ayato interrupts. “I appreciate all your efforts you’ve done for me.. and I’m guessing for ( Name ) as well since it looks as if you two have met already.” He chuckles softly at the sight of pink in Chisato’s cheeks as confirmation of his assumption. “...If anything, it should be me who should apologize.” 

Chisato’s eyes widened, and before she could protest, Ayato quickly explained. “I apologize for not telling you anything about my situation with ( Name ) back then. I thought it was better to be quiet about it, knowing you couldn’t do anything to stop this marriage since… your father is a man who can’t be convinced.”

The bride looks away from his gaze. Although it’s true that she still couldn’t do anything about the marriage, she feels as if she still had a part in this marriage in the first place and feels guilty about it despite not being the one to suggest it to her father.

“I wanted to tell you before the wedding.” Ayato adds, smiling in sadness. “But I didn’t want to hurt your feelings and.. I was afraid that you would react badly, I don’t want to risk anything.” 

“I understand,” Chisato spoke. “I… I just feel so sorry that you have to break up with your lover for this.” 

“You don’t have to. ( Name ) and I have come to accept our fate.” He then looks at the door behind Chisato. “The one who was behind all of this is your father.” 

“I know,” she whispered. “I… I don’t know what I can do to make him pay for everything. I’m scared that if I stand up against him, he’ll…”

“Hurt everyone you love?” He finishes her sentence. 

“...”

“You’re not the only one who knows his dirty methods.” Ayato says softly, his heart aching at the thought of the Kaedehara family and Kamaji, who have fallen by the hands of the corrupted CEO. “That’s why it’s best that you and I are on the same side in this marriage. We can somehow… Somehow find a way to stop your father and bring him to jail together, even if it’ll take years to get that opportunity.” 

She feels speechless from his bold proposal. “..I’m scared.” She admits, feeling chills down her spine from the memory of Shinsuke slapping her. “I just don’t know what to do if he hurts one of my friends – or even you.” 

“He won’t. We just need to be careful and have each other.” Ayato reassures her. “If you stop this marriage now, he won’t hold back anymore and hurt everyone.”

Chisato clenches her teeth at the thought. As much as she doesn’t want to admit it, the groom is right about what Shinsuke would do. “...Alright…” 

He then places a hand on her shoulder, something that’d make her shudder in fear if this was done by her father. 

But said hand isn’t her father’s, but her soon-to-be-husband’s. 

“I feel sad that I can’t love you as much as you do with me,” Ayato confesses, “I’m still not ready to fall in love, but.. But all of this doesn’t change the fact that I see you as someone I trust.”

She slowly places her hand on his. “I.. I trust you too. I want to be here for you.” 

The two of them stay silent, until Ayato decides it’s time for them to get out of the bathroom for Chisato to get ready once again. “Let’s go back and get you ready for the wedding. We can talk more about this when we’re out of here.” 

The woman nodded with a smile that’s no longer strained, and she no longer finds herself being suffocated by her dress that she loved when she first wore it. 

–

As you await for the wedding couple to come back, you couldn’t help but be curious about what’s going on behind the scenes as everyone continues chatting away. 

You flinched when you felt someone sitting down next to you, causing you to look to your right and see the man you were looking for the entire time. 

“You… You actually came.” You spoke up in pleasant surprise. 

“I’m not late, aren’t I?” Diluc asks. 

You shook your head in response, smiling. “The wedding hasn’t started yet due to some inconveniences, so you’re just right in time.” 

“That’s good.” 

As if on cue, the music started playing once more, causing everyone to instantly look behind to where the wedding couple will walk down the aisle. 

You can’t find yourself paying attention to the scene, not when you find Diluc so attractive with his outfit and hairdo. Instead of having a low ponytail with his usual polo outfit that he wears in the hotel or his usual outfit when serving drinks, he had his hair on a high ponytail instead with a neat tuxedo.

Is it just you or is the room getting hot?

When you realized you’re not hiding the fact that you’re checking the Diluc Ragnvindr out so shamelessly in a wedding ceremony, you quickly looked away and watch the ceremony in embarrassment. 

As soon as Chisato walked out of the doors, everyone stood up, all in awe at the sight of the bride at her most beautiful self. With the lights and colors around the aisle, she truly looked as if she’s glowing like a shining star in an empty night sky. 

You watched in awe as well, watching her walk towards where Ayato is, whose smile is as genuine as his love once was with you. 

You could only hope his future with Chisato is just as genuine.

By the time the bride stands next to the groom, everyone sat back down and watched the couple exchange their vows and promises. 

You never thought you’d feel so happy and relieved on their wedding day instead of dread and sorrow like you always felt about Ayato. But now that you have come to an end with Ayato and Chisato, you can happily say you’re free from the clutches of being stuck in the past after years of longing and wondering. 

“Are you alright?” Diluc suddenly asks softly towards you. 

You look back at the red-haired man in surprise, before relaxing with a smile. 

“I’ve never been better.” 

“You may now kiss the bride.” The priest announces, causing the wedding couple to lean in and kiss to seal their marriage. 

As everyone, including you, clap for the wedding couple, you fail to notice a certain man whose been eyeing your direction menacingly. 

But someone did notice.

PREVIOUS || NEXT

Anw anon, i reread the first draf pf part 2 i did and it doesn't fit to my liking so i'll try to redo it (i swear if i got burnout again)

when is ‘the street performer i met today’2 coming up? :)

no pressure!

AGSHAHHA NONNIE SO SORRY I FROGOT, bro this past week i've been busy asf. But dw i'll try to finish it asap 😞👍

BRSOOH HOW ARE YOU SO GOOD AT WRITINGNGGNNGNGNNGGN WAHHH NOT FAIRRRRR #sobbing and crying anywasy how have u been

ME GOOD AT WRITINF?! NO, SINCE WHEN WERE I GOOD IN WRITING ☹ but bro you did good at writing too so no crying here, no crying allowed 😊

(Anw yes im doing good, currently having my after exam holiday 😍, kind of worried abt my grade too sadly...)

A LIFETIME IN REPEAT / kamisato ayato ( genshin impact ) ( WHAT WILL SURVIVE OF US IS LOVE ) a/n: reincarnation au. quote by philip larkin. title from eden - circles. for @yelans spring serenades event w/ the theme being rebirth. thank you for arranging this !!

i. under the cherry blossoms lies love eternal, wistful and tranquil in existence. under the cherry blossoms there is the blooming of flowers in spring reborn, the sun brilliant in her ways as she blesses the earth with warmth once more.

under the cherry blossoms is a promise of tomorrow in the way ayato holds you, bodies pressed closely together, his hands resting on your hips. you sway together, side to side, in temporary respite ; the quickening and slowing of time blurs -- and it doesn't make sense, but it does : the way you could find sanctuary in his arms forever, the way it’s over in the blink of an eye and you find yourselves missing each other all the more.

“relax, love.”

ayato whispers the words softly into your ear and laughs when you tense in response. your cheeks heat up, but you tell yourself it’s from the weather and leave it at that. you’ve never gotten used to his endearing terms and you’re sure he plays it to his advantage.

“i don’t slow dance-- and when were you so romantic, anyway?”

“i’ve always been a romantic at heart,” comes the matter-of-fact answer, though you sense underlying amusement in it, “now, relax. you can always lean on me.”

your lips part with the intention of a ( hopefully ) composed reply, but his smile is all too gentle, so the words fade into oblivion. instead, there is a feeling of happiness that dwells deep within the heart. you let out a sigh of defeat, pretend you didn’t hear him chuckle, wrap your arms around his neck, and lean your head against his chest.

“the flowers are beautiful this season.” you half-heartedly murmur, face still ablaze as you seek distraction elsewhere. ayato knows this, kisses you on the head in quiet comfort. you feel him smile against your skin and you do not think you will ever get tired of the sensation.

“yes, they are.” he says, and somewhere in the tidal waves of the soul, there is a bittersweetness that invokes itself in the thought of a future known. “they are beautiful.”

( under the cherry blossoms is serenity and devotion and everything birthed from love. under the cherry blossoms there are lovers who will grow old and gray together, hand in hand.

under the cherry blossoms, in yet another spring, will lie love eternal after days long passed. in the roots of tomorrow, it will be found again. always again. )

ii. the colors blur, window to window, view by view. the subway hums, floods itself with life as passengers travel to and from, and here you are, gaze distant, vacant. waiting. you live this life now and it’s all you know. it feels weird, empty-- but you think that’s kinda how it goes nowadays : learn what it means to be an adult, or rather, function as one, have a crisis, think you’re taking all the wrong twists & turns, and learn to fake it like everyone else.

it is exhausting. you are exhausted.

you sigh, discontentment transparent on your visage. the subway buzzes again, but all the sounds twist into background noise, automatically blocked out from your senses. you fail to notice the stranger that appears before you until he gets a little too close for comfort-- and that’s when you’re suddenly all too aware of how crowded it is. you try to step back, take maybe half a step, really, and that hardly does much, but he senses your discomfort and offers a wry, apologetic smile.

you know that smile, is your immediate thought, but you don’t get to reflect on it too much before someone shoves him into you. he wraps an arm around you, staggers for a moment before finding stability, and here you are, one hand on his shoulder and the other desperately hanging onto the overhead handle.

“i deeply apologize.” are the first words you hear, and there is something about his voice that soothes the anxiety that brews in your chest. “are you hurt?”

your breath hitches in your throat. your eyes sting suddenly and your vision goes unclear, and that stupid, stupid, lump in your throat is too noticeable and bothersome. this is ridiculous and dramatic, you joke to yourself, and you want to find rationale, reason-- something -- to explain this whirlwind of emotions that sweeps you off your feet.

you nod because that’s all you really can do; you want to say sorry when you see concern adorn his features, but he smiles, he smiles and you’ve seen it before, somehow, and you think you are crying now.

“‘m okay.” you whisper. “i’m okay. thank you.”

“you’re welcome.”

the subway hums again. longing fills your heart. you want to know why.

the stranger clears his throat, lets go of you, and you stand before each other in silence.

“my name is ayato.” he tells you. he offers you a handkerchief. “i believe we’ve met before.”

tears trail down your face. it is three in the afternoon. you are on the subway with a stranger. you do not remember something you should.

“i don’t remember you.”

ayato’s smile almost falters, but he is used to masking such emotions, so he maintains it ever so perfectly, hoping that you will not feel guilt for something that is not in your control.

( you don’t remember him. that’s okay, he thinks. he will wait for you until the end of time. it’s okay, even if it hurts. )

iii. with an aching heart made of uncertainty, you fall asleep to peaceful dreams that night. it takes place in a regal estate, splendid and grand in its decor. you wonder how you find yourself in such a setting. it’s busy-- chaotic and calm at the same time, moving constantly at a steady pace as voices and faces flood the halls. you recognize these voices, hear yourself among them.

the faces are blurred. all of them.

this is where you belong. these are days you’ve experienced before ; nostalgia lines itself in the hollows of your ribs, wraps its knowing around your lungs. you have lived and breathed this life.

you can’t remember.

you wake up. the ache grows deeper, burrows itself in fragile heartstrings. you fall back asleep, vision engulfed in pink hues of cherry blossoms and ayato’s name lingering on your tongue.

iv. you don’t remember anything, not really. you know you dreamt of something strange and significant and it bothers you, horribly so-- but these things will come in time, you suppose. so you move on with your day, hope you can find solace in falling back to your daily routine.

you enter the cafe, inhaling deeply when the aroma of coffee overloads your senses. there’s comfort to be found in the little things, you remind yourself, ordering your regular drink. it’s not long before you’ve settled into the corner of the cafe, set up your laptop and stationary. your focus goes into your work for an hour or two-- maybe longer-- until you see a familiar face before you again.

“what a coincidence.” ayato muses, curiosity in purple eyes. “i did not expect to see you here.”

you stare at each other in silence for a moment-- you, more so out of shock, ayato, truthfully, in amusement at such a reaction to his presence.

“you must have missed me, finding me already.” comes your response, a forced lightheartedness in your voice meant to disperse the tension in your body.

“i did, in fact. may i sit with you?”

you almost want to think he’s joking with you, but the way he looks at you is too tender, too knowing, and somehow, it breaks your heart.

( ayato spends hours with you at that cafe. it feels like home, feels right. feels like something is missing and it shouldn’t be. )

v. you don’t ask ayato what he meant back then, where he recognized you or how he recognized you. you didn’t ask when you first met on the subway, didn’t ask at the coffee shop, didn’t ask during any single encounter you’ve had in these past few months.

you are frightened of the unknown, and perhaps you are a coward for that.

( because you want to know, but there’s something in the nagging feeling you carry that makes you want to run away from all of this. but you don’t because you know you shouldn’t. because in all the time you have spent with him since that fated meeting, maybe there is a place in your heart for him that grows larger and larger and maybe that scares you. )

you walk along the quiet streets, side by side with ayato. the storm has long passed, puddles of water reflecting gloomy skies. it is nearing the end of fall but the weather does not let up, always unpredictable in its path.

“i enjoy the rain when i am aware of its incoming presence.” ayato mumbles, gaze cast upwards at the clouds.

“you don’t like getting caught up in it and getting your beautiful hair ruined?”

“i don’t.” he laughs at your teasing tone. “you find my hair beautiful?”

“i do.”

“how generous of you.” he hums, and there’s an extra little skip in his step now. “i find you beautiful, as well.”

your face gets hot. how embarrassing.

“so romantic.” you mumble, clearing your throat. you can’t help but feel familiarity in such exchanges. “what’s your favorite season, anyway?”

ayato’s gait comes to a standstill. you pause, watch as a sorrowful and hopeful smile rests on the curve of his lips. he glances up at the sky once more before he looks at you, his hand brushing against the back of yours.

“i have always been fond of spring.”

“why’s that?”

you don’t move your hand away. he notices this, remains cautious, gentle, and laces his fingers with yours. it’s warm, comforting.

“it reminds me of someone i love.”

you freeze, see the way ayato looks at you-- like there’s something more, like he has known you in a life past-- and you want to speak, but nothing can register or come to mind.

the rain pours again, but neither of you move.

“you told me that we’ve met before.” your voice quivers. “so why don’t i remember you? i know you. i dreamt about you once, i think. i don’t know. why don’t i know? where have we met? what do you know?”

panic arises with each word spoken. you’re crying again, just like you did the first time you met. you feel like an idiot, your chest tightening with anxiety. ayato squeezes your hand. it would be so easy to tell you everything, to bring the memories back all at once. but such things take time, he kindly reminds himself, so he will wait until it all comes back.

“you’re not going to tell me.” you whisper. he shakes his head, places an umbrella over your heads. “then tell me this: the person you love-- is it me? and did i love you once, before?”

ayato smiles, just as he always does, and the tears run rampant.

( you both know the answer already. you know this, don’t you? )

vi. you dream again that night. it’s a different dream, but almost the same-- the hustle and bustle surrounds you, overwhelms you. you’re not entirely familiar with this environment yet. you only know some of the voices-- a bright, cheerful one that always seems to bring a smile to your face. a soothing one that always brings reassurance. you hear a bark and playful laughter, and in your heart there is relief.

you’ve done this before.

“daydreaming again?”

you recognize that voice. you are quick to turn on your heel, though reluctance fills the corners of your mind. you are afraid the faces will be hidden again, obscure just like last time, but they are not.

ayato stands before you, almost entirely the same with exception of attire. maybe you are daydreaming-- this is a dream, after all, and the boundaries between what is real and what is not are too chaotic to distinguish. but that doesn’t stop you from hoping, from thinking this could be what you were trying to remember after all. in the realization of such, you cry again. you cry again and again because you hope that this is it, that it’s not just a dream, that you’ve finally come to understand ayato’s words and what that emptiness meant.

“what is it? what’s wrong?” ayato asks, dabbing the tears away with a handkerchief. you know that one, recall it from the subway.

“nothing’s wrong.” you laugh in disbelief, shake your head as his thumb grazes over your cheek. “i’m okay. we’re okay.”

( you wake up the next morning. you remember it all. )

vii. it is spring now. you have not seen him in a long while-- perhaps out of avoidance or a clash in schedules, neither of you are sure. you weren’t ready to tell him once you awoke from that dream, more so because you couldn’t comprehend it all-- thoma, ayaka, ayato--

you spent a lifetime with him before. you were married to him and you loved him. you danced under the cherry blossoms on the first day of spring and you told him you didn’t slow dance, that you weren’t good at it, but he didn’t care, as long as he could hold you close.

you sit on the park bench with him now, quiet. children play in the distance, their laughter filling the silence that rests heavily in the air. your hands wring nervously in your lap, words unspoken lodged in your throat. you want to tell him, but you don’t know how. you want to tell him that you know, and you’re almost sure he knows this, too.

“have you been well? it’s been awhile.”

he starts off slowly, treads carefully on thin ice.

“i’ve been...thinking. i dreamt about you again.”

“oh?”

“i cried a lot in the dream.”

“you do that often in reality, too.”

you laugh for the first time that day, feeling your body relax against the bench. your hand rests at your side now, brushes against ayato’s. wanting. waiting. hoping.

the cherry blossoms are in bloom now, the wind casting the petals along the sky. they fall gently, gracefully, and it reminds you both of that day.

they’re beautiful, aren’t they?” ayato asks, taking note of the closed distance between you two. he swallows hard, curious as to why he hesitates now- because maybe you truly do remember now, and maybe this is the moment he’s been waiting for all this time-- the reunion of two lovers. his hand finds yours. you do not pull away.

“they always have been.” you smile faintly, intertwining your fingers. you ignore the way your voice trembles and you hope he does, too. you inhale deeply, close your eyes. “can i lean on you, ayato?”

you know. you have to, he thinks, and he cannot help the surprise that appears in purple hues. you look at him, countenance riddled with apprehension, and there’s that familiar curl of the lips you have seen many times before. he nods in confirmation, so you rest your head on his shoulder.

pink petals fall onto your laps-- delicate, loved, and seen.

“i remember you.” you whisper. the wind almost drowns out the words, but his grip on your hand tightens. “i remember our life back then-- being married, spending time in the garden when it was the beginning of spring. i-- i took so long ayato. i took so long to remember you.”

in your voice there is regret, but in his eyes there is understanding. you want to apologize, but you know he would tell you there is no need for such things.

“i knew you would, in time. i would have waited for you, nonetheless.”

ah. you’re going to start crying again. you laugh when he pulls out that handkerchief again, but when the tears come, he kisses them away ever so gently before murmuring words of comfort. his arms wrap around you, hold reassuring and filled with ardor.

“i missed you.” you whisper against his lips, and how lovely it is to feel him smile against them once more. “i love you.”

“i love you, too.” he tells you, once, twice, a million times-- as many as he needs to until it is known. “i will love and find you in every lifetime, my love.”

( under the cherry blossoms is rebirth and reinvigoration of life. under the cherry blossoms, there is love lost and love found.

under the cherry blossoms, there is you and the one you love, reunited at last. )

Ya'all better support this bitchass if not im gonna combust <333

YOU BEING DRUNK FEAT: childe, zhongli, diluc

CHILDE

childe had just gotten back from a longgg work trip

and what'd know! he brought back some expensive ass wine, and you thought you'd treat yourself to some

well one glass turned into two, then four, and here you are seven glasses in and you weren't doing so good

ontop of that wine, you had also been enjoying a few shots of firewater that childe brought back from his visit home

so the surprise on childe's face when he walks in and finds you draped over the coffee table with the whole bottle of wine in hand, he can connect the dots

probably laugh at you

when you're slurring your words, he'll mock you and do the cheek-pulling thing "i have the groceries!" childe had just gotten home after his late-night trip to the grocery store in order to pick up a few things for tomorrow's breakfast. "oh!" he stood in the kitchen noticing the empty firewater container and the wine bottle in your hand, and he couldn't hold it in anymore and just fucking starts giggling and cackling. "what have you gotten into dear y.n!" he drops off the brown bag he was carrying in his hand to come to your aid, but instead of words you let out lazy mumbles and sniffles. "ill get a cold rag, stay here" just as he was getting up, he heard the start of more sniffling that turned into you bawling your eyes out. "do--on't leaVe" your voice was cracking and you were sniffling in between words, but he still understood you. in fact, he thought it was quite cute when you were drunk and just let your mouth have no filter(in private ofc). "im here y.n, im here" you simply just laid in his arms drooling on him as you passed out by his legs. childe may or may not have taken a few pictures with his camera, he'll show you in the morning. he soon moved you to your bed, where you awoke the next morning with the worst headache and hangover sickness. you could only recall half of what happened last night, but you knew once childe heard you stirring awake, he'd come and tease you about it, and you were right. "i never knew you were so clingy!" he said as you both sat at the table, you eating cereal with messy hair and dark under eyes. "you know you should get drunk more often!" you weren't in the mood for his teasing and laughing so early in the morning, so you simply just shot him a glare and he smiled as he talked about his work trip and just how happy he was to be home.

ZHONGLI

he'd honestly probably lecture you the morning after

he just wants to keep you safe (maybe idk)

but, he knows just how to take care of you, and makes sure that the hangover the next morning won't be that bad

still kind of annoyed at you though

but it was ventis birthday today, and wherever venti was, alcohol was

so you and zhongli showed up to celebrate of course!

and no surprise, you got drunk, so now zhongli has to drag you back home and take care of you. he noticed how you started acting loose as the night went on. being flushed, clumsy and touchy, a little too much for his tastes. so now, he just needed to get you home. "y.n, i think it's time we need to go." you were talking with kaeya, venti, and childe about memories from the past years, so not wanting to leave you tried to bargain with him "just 10 more minutes, kay?" cocktail in hand, you gave him a smile...yea you were drunk. "y.n, let's go you can call them in the morning." you let out an annoyed groan, not wanting to leave yet. "mr. zhongli! here, you can go home and ill drive y.n home in an hour! they'll be back twelve sharp sir!" it's not that zhongli didn't trust you, there was just a dangerous aspect seeing how 3/4 of the people here were already drunk out of there minds. and all the people who'd be willing to take you home were drunk. "thanks for the offer ajax, but i think y.n needs to head home. they have work in the morning." did you? nope. but zhongli thought as long as you're drunk, you'd believe him. and what'd you know! he was right. "well, i can call in sick rightttt" you were now leaning on zhongli, arms wrapped around his broad shoulders, trying to persuade him into letting one of your friends drive you home. "and plus! it's venti's birthday, one day wouldn't hurt liii" the nickname caught him by surprise, but he wasn't letting you off that easy. "i hope you know i'm not above dragging you out of here y.n." you frowned and turned to venti, giving him the cocktail you'd been holding. "bye guys..." you frowned intensely hoping zhongli would see that and let you stay, nope. you guys got in the car and you just started fuck bawling your eyes out. "AUHUHUHUH *sniff* UHUHAHU" you were throwing a whole fit in the passenger set of your boyfriend's car "YOU'RE SO MEANN AUHUHAHA" kicking and screaming just like a child, it was funny to zhongli causing him to smirk a bit. the fit kept on until you guys were halfway home, and when zhongli pulled into the driveway, you were fast asleep (or passed out) on your own lap. folded over. he wonder how you could sleep like that. but regardless he carried you into the bed and took off your shoes, and clothes, and placed you into your pajamas. then just tucked you in. he enjoyed moments where he could find the time to just take care of you, even if it meant having to lecture you in the morning about throwing fits and getting drunk on a tuesday night, but that could wait. instead, he got a rag and cooled down your flushed face, then left a glass of water for you to drink. "fuck...." you woke up, hair in an absolute mess, nose stuffy, and fucking thirsty. and zhongli heard you as you stirred awake and came to your aid. "this is what happens when you get drunk." he opened the bottle of nausea medicine on his bedside table and gave you one. you were very lucky to have him. "you know, getting drunk can lead to multiple brain....." he started to lecture you, it'd become his habit.

DILUC

he's had to deal with multiple drunk clients, so naturally, he's veryy good at it

but still gets kind of annoyed with you for doing it, like bro wtf?

and you did it, right in front of him too. in his own tavern. in public

well lets just say you and kaeya got into a drinking game, diluc knew you had some self-control, but that self-control gets washed away with kaeya.

and he was right

you guys are about to pass you, burping and nauseated but still pushing the limits.

diluc didn't even take a good look at you until now.

your face is basically tomato red and laughing along with kaeya

he blames the whole thing on kaeya "one more round pleaseeeee" you say, laughing right afterward with kaeya. diluc turns to face you, and let's just say he's not the happiest. "..kaeya leave." kaeya laughs it off, then grabs your arm to continue your drinking game somewhere else. well, that was until diluc intervened. grabbing your other arm "y.n, you're staying here until i'm done. i'll talk with you later." you turned to kaeya for help with the now very angry diluc. and kaeya was no help, just waving you off as he left in search of a new tavern to push the limits. "eat these." he pushed crackers your way and kept on dealing with knights and what-not around the tavern. you were surprised venti wasn't there that night. if so then you'd be able to have a free way of stealing wine from behind the counter. you started on the crackers thinking of a way to get more beer or wine from diluc without him noticing. but, why not just ask him! he loves you after all! "dilllucccc" you said, head laying in your arms "yes y.n?" he wasn't facing you due to him serving another customer, but he still heard you nonetheless "one more *hic* wine please!" waving your hand side to side lazily so he would pay attention "y.n, you've had enough already. you're turning into that green bastard poet." he waved you off, cleaning glasses while taking orders. "bUT-" and here the waterworks go, yea... "you said-!" "y.n.... here, have some water." he handed you a cup which you just stared in the water with your tears mixing in with the water. "ill close the tavern early and we can get home, ok?" "ok!" and back to your perky self, bipolar much?

this shit rough af, but im to lazy to fix it soo👍👍 pocket lent if u guess what my old blog was💖

SEASONS OF BLOSSOM. [0.1]

love can start anywhere, even if yours started out fake.

genshintoon event hosted by @stellumi. img creds: "seasons of blossom" on webtoon.

part 1 (here!) — part 2 [wip]

pairing: xiao + gn!reader // word count: 4.4k // au: fake dating + high school // warnings: fluff, some swearing, reader's height not specified, very slight chilumi but not really (i just needed a character that was shorter than xiao that might like childe, also it's onesided)

author's note: as a writer who only writes fluff, i could not resist a fake dating au with xiao, especially if it's inspired by seasons of blossom. thanks to vera for letting me join this collab! you don't have to really read the webtoon series beforehand to read this, but it is recommended to better understand it! (if you do so, you can just glance at episode 2 + 3 to get a general idea ^^) this work is inspired off of "seasons of blossom" with many events changed, but otherwise i hope you all enjoy!

you like childe just a tiny bit, but you didn't think it was obvious or shown in your expressions at all. while he is seen as a friend of you and lumine, everyone in your class seems to nag at you and talk about how cute of a couple you two would be.

"you see... i like childe too," the girl across the table from you shyly says, and your mind blanks out—who was she again? she sat behind you in class, right? you weren't sure why you were sitting with her and her friends, just being waved over to their table as you and lumine had decided to go to burger king together for your lunch break.

you can hear lumine from beside you letting out a frustrated huff as the girl continues. "i don't really stand a chance of dating him, so just being friends with him would be nice!" your back visibly stiffens when her eyes move to look closely at you. "... but since you're close friends with childe, i wanted to ask you for help. would you be okay with that?"

"oh..." you awkwardly start with a chuckle. "we're just friends, so it really isn't my place to do, uhm... that. i'm not sure if i would be any help anyways."

"of course! you would be super helpful," the girl obliviously cheers and you're not sure if she even noticed your hesitance. "since i'm not really asking for much, can you introduce—"

"no," lumine coldly interrupts, and you sweatdrop at her sudden straightforwardness. she slams her phone down onto the table and all the girls across jolt in surprise. "we're not in elementary school, so why are you asking my friend for help to talk to someone?"

"w-what? why are you being like that lumine?" the girl stammers out while shaking her head. "[name] should be fine with it, so why—"

"because i like him too."

what? everyone around the table turns to lumine in surprise, especially you. she crosses her arms and holds her head up high, continuing with a deadpan look on her face. "i like childe too. so, no."

you can't help it—you yelp out in shock. "wait what?! you like childe? since when?"

"not for long." lumine simply says. "i don't think everyone heard you yet. should i get you a megaphone?"

you mumble out a little oops and a sorry, covering your mouth with your hands. you had no idea that lumine liked childe too—was she joking or just lying for fun?

"w-wow!" the girl's voice from across the table makes you turn to her. "you guys are best friends liking the same guy... what are you two going to do? what if [name] dates childe, lumine?"

your mind races—no one truly knows that you like childe a bit too, it hasn't been confirmed at all. and even if he did return the feelings (which unbeknownst to you, he did), could you do that to lumine and date him in front of her? your heart solemnly skips a bit in your chest, thinking what were these girls doing butting into other people's businesses anyway?

"i think there's a misunderstanding here," you start to speak up, and it's their turn to turn to you instead. "i... don't like childe."

"what?" you can see in your peripheral vision that lumine raises her eyebrow in confusion.

seeing that the other girls are confused too, you continue with the lying. "childe is my friend, yes—but i don't like him romantically like that."

"wait, really?" your classmate leans forward in her chair in absolute bewilderment. her hands palm down onto the table to hold herself up. "then who do you like, if not childe??"

ah, shit. you force a smile as your brain tries to list the people that have nothing at all to do with you. can you really lie your way out of this?

yes, you will, you make yourself think. do it for lumine.

without anymore stalling, you laugh out an awkward chuckle while scratching the back of your head. "i, uh... x-xiao! i like xiao!— you know, the guy who sits at the back of the class?"

while lumine abruptly sits up and yells at you a shocked, "no way in hell!" you can only sheepishly grin and hope that everyone will just believe you and forget about it in a week's time.

little did you know, the very guy that you mentioned is sitting at the table right behind yours— grimacing as his friend beside him (who was listening in on your conversation) spits out their drink at the sound of xiao's name.

you don't know what you have gotten yourself into.

(press "keep reading" to continue!)

"i still don't believe that you like xiao," lumine straightforwardly states. the two of you are standing at the staircase by your classroom, backs to the wall with her standing beside you. "really? the short guy who bumped into us last week?"

you can't help but giddily laugh, remembering what had happened. "well to be fair, i bumped into him first." it was true, you remember the day like it was just this morning.

both you and lumine walk out of the room at the start of your new semester, full of new classes, new teachers, and especially new classmates and students. she links her arm comfortably with yours as you two walk into the hallway. "holy crap, everything is so confusing. how are you and childe so settled in already?"

you can't help but giggle at her words. you open your mouth to respond when you suddenly feel your shoulder hit someone, and you turn to see a raven green-haired boy's head down to look at a game on a phone. one of his friends yelps out, "noo! i died!"

"sorry! are you okay?" you worriedly ask even as lumine still drags you along. you hold out your other hand to tap on the male's shoulder and he turns to you with a blank look. "hello?" ...what was his name again? "sorry for bumping into you—"

"it's fine, it's not my account anyway," the male calmly responds as his friend cries out something about losing a legendary item. your eyebrows only raise higher in concern.

"oh.. really? i'm still sorry, i didn't see you—"

"oh, forget it already!" lumine sighs out, exasperated as she keeps pulling you along. "you don't have to apologize so many times! and it's not your fault you couldn't see him, he's tiny as fuck!"

"l-lumine?!" you call out in surprise as you walk with her down the hallway. "how could you say that?" she only ignores you, continuing ranting about how rude they were for standing in the middle of the hallway. you turn around to look at the male and his friends while hoping that they weren't too offended.

you watch as the green-haired male only stares at you walk away, his friends hovered around him (and also above him, they're taller) while they hold out their hands with concerned looks, probably telling him not to think about what lumine said. you feel a bit bad, even debating going back to apologize for your friend's words when you see his mouth start to open to say something.

"hey," he calls out, and you can see lumine's head turn from beside you. the look of shock completely cascades over your face when he continues to say, "girl who's tinier than the guy who's tiny as fuck. you should grow yourself some common courtesy, it looks like you really need it."

"i still have no idea why you held me back from socking a punch to his face, that little idiot!" lumine's scoff brings you back to reality. you watch as she sips from a box of strawberry milk while her eyebrows narrow. "and by the way, i was lying about liking childe yesterday. i just wanted to say what that girl would say... you get what i mean, right?" she sighs out when you shake your head with a confused look. "you can drop the act, i know you like childe."

well, you confidently think. unfortunately for her, i'm not thinking about backing down anytime soon. "it's nothing like that, lumi. i was being honest, i really do like xiao."

"arghh!! don't say it again, you weirdo!" she cries out, and you giggle. "what's so good about him anyway?! i honestly don't get your type at all."

"he's cute," you speak truthfully— and technically, you were not lying. "his hairstyle suits him, and the way some of his hair strands wave around his face look really pretty." you do a quick motion with your hands to demonstrate and lumine raises her judging eyebrows at you. "and he always has this attractive red eyeliner on that matches his eyes perfectly, and—oh! and his lean figure fits his motorcycle jacket so satisfyingly to me. it's like he's those guys who are hot, pretty, and cute at the same time, don't you think?"

"no! stop rambling dummy!!" lumine visibly reddens, and you were sure that the last description you mentioned reminded her of her crush. you laughed as she spoke, "he's rude and brash! and super short!"

"hmm, kind of reminds me of someone," you funnily teased as the bell rang, and lumine whacked you lightly on the shoulder. "we should head back to class, that was the bell."

"you're such a fucking weirdo," lumine grumbled as you two walked down the stairs to your class floor. you could only keep giggling in return at her words, holding out your hand to take her milk box to throw away.

yet again, out of your notice and vision there he was; xiao at the top of the stairs, leaning against the wall as he looked down at his phone. his friends freaked out and fumbled from beside him, staring at him with a perplexed look.

"what are you going to do, xiao?" one of them, chongyun, asked. a blush was on his face just hearing you talk adoringly about xiao. "our classmate likes you!"

"what do you mean?" xiao simply replies with the phone still in his hands. "i'm gonna defeat this boss, that's what. that was just the warning bell."

"that's not what yunyun means!" hu tao, xiao's other friend, cries out. "remember when i spat out my drink at burger king at our classmates talking about you and childe?"

"yeah, very clearly," he sourly says. he remembers that they weren't really talking about him though—he was only mentioned when you brought up your crush on him.

hu tao ignores his words while ranting on. "that person already said that they liked you! twice! do you not care, oh-mighty nonchalant god?"

xiao only responds with a, "they have a name you know." he turns his head towards chongyun, motioning towards the phone in his hands. "you're on low health, yun."

the blue-haired male completely forgets about the conversation beforehand as he yelps out, "wait-wait-wait, drink a healing potion! that one! quickly!"

hu tao groans. "you two are so clueless!"

hu tao might be half right... but it seems that nobody notices the tips of xiao's ears blazing red, him standing between his friends looking over his shoulder at the phone. your words are still ingrained into his mind as he has to repeatedly take in your words and realize what you had said over and over again... do you actually like him?

ever since april and spring had started, new students were assigned the duty to clean the classroom once the school day was over so the old students from winter didn't have to do it anymore. unfortunately for lumine, your name was called along with the other names, meaning that you couldn't hang out as much after school anymore. you also felt a nudge on your shoulder from the girl (from burger king) who sat behind you, giving you a thumbs-up and a whispered "good luck!" when xiao's name was called as well. you two were stuck on mop duty while childe and zhongli did dusting and amber and yoimiya were on broom duty.

"we should probably come later next time since we have to mop after the brooms," you spoke awkwardly, gripping the handle of your mop to your chest as you stood beside xiao in the back of the classroom. everyone else seemed to lively clean the room together as you two were quiet, xiao on his phone while you guys waited for everyone else to finish together.

the only thing he said in return was a "yeah." and it was silent once again after that.

then came midterms— meaning the students didn't have to clean after the day was over until midterms were over. you quickly gazed at the questions of your paper as the teacher called out instructions, your hand reaching for your pencil bag until you realized you didn't have the right pen the teacher mentioned beforehand. you calmly scooted to the side of your chair and tapped on lumine's shoulder, who sat diagonally to the left and front of you, and she turned and raised her eyebrow at you.

"oh shit, i don't have an extra scantron pen," lumine silently cursed after you told her your problem. she pondered for a while with a finger tapping her chin. "if you want, i can ask the teacher for you—"

"no-no, it's okay," you quickly whispered with a smile. "i'll just ask around, thank you lumi."

she sent you a worried look and a good luck thumbs-up as you leaned back into your chair. swallowing your nerves, you turned around and asked the girl behind you, "hey, do you have an extra scantron pen?"

she shook her head with a sad look, "sorry, i only brought one. maybe ask kyun?"

well crap, you didn't know who that was. you just simply nod your head and whisper a small thank-you before turning back around with a sigh. even if the teacher would scold you in front of everyone, you would just have to ask her if you could borrow one. it didn't seem like there was another way out of this situation.

however, right as you are about to raise your hand, you see a subtle hand out of the corner of your eye place a pen (the exact pen you needed) at the side of your desk. your eyes can't help but widen in shock— everyone you asked didn't seem to have an extra pen, so how did someone else notice that you needed one?

"xiao!" the teacher calls out, and you turn to look up at him with surprise and a little guilt for getting him into any possible trouble. "what are you doing standing up? we are about to start a test."

"i accidentally dropped something," he calmly replies, holding up his other hand with a pen in it. "i need it for the test."

everyone's eyes seem to fly to xiao's figure, and you freeze up as you definitely feel the eyes of lumine and the girl behind you on you. the teacher sighs as she says something along the lines of ask next time, and motions for xiao to sit back down. when he glances at you as he turns around, your heart literally skips a bit before sending him a thankful look before he walks back to his seat.

lumine's eyes feel like they take a while to leave your face, and for the rest of your test, the only thing you can think about is xiao's sunset eyes gazing into yours— even if it was just for half a second. you couldn't even tell if your warm face would ever cool down until you were done answering all of the questions on your papers.

however, lumine's eyes weren't the only ones on you. hu tao stared at the back of your head in awe, absolute surprised at what had just happened.

xiao, the introvert. xiao, the tsundere. xiao, the quiet, scarily good gamer. xiao, the one hu tao knows very well that doesn't like to interact with people at all, just voluntarily stood up and gave you one of his extra pens. well to be honest— his only pen. xiao had turned around in his seat and ordered hu tao to give him one of her extras, because she "always brings a shit-ton of writing utensils". hu tao could only watch in astonishment when he stood up and put his pen onto your desk, and not only that, but also flat-out lied to the teacher with an excuse.

if hu tao said that she wasn't shocked a little bit, then she would be straight-up lying to everyone's faces.

"it's been a while since we had to clean," you start to say, mopping one side of the classroom with xiao mopping the other side. the fact that it was just the two of you inside with unbearable silence was killing you, and although it would be awkward, starting small talk sounded a bit better than two high schoolers silently mopping together. "how did you do on your midterms?"

"alright," is all he says, and you chuckle nervously in response while continuing with the mopping. you keep your eyes focused on the ground, finally realizing why lumine didn't believe your lie of having a crush on xiao—he's complete opposites with childe. while childe is chaotic and full of life, energy, and fun, xiao is quiet and keeps his hobbies to himself. he doesn't seem to speak up much unless asked to, and he seems to keep an expressionless look on his face. and you told lumine that you were crushing on this guy? whoever believed you probably had their eyes on their ass.

you look up when the front of your mop hits against another one, and meet the eyes of xiao in the process. you guys had finished mopping the room, finally meeting at the same side, but it's like you can't stop laughing to make up for the silence when you're with xiao— a brand new giggle bubbles out of you instinctively.

"we met," you point out the obvious, tapping his mop lightly with yours and then pulling it back to your side with a little aftermath of embarrassment. your head suddenly perks up at remembering something to say, and you let out an ahem before speaking again. "oh and, uh... thank you for lending me your pen last time. it was a lot of help."

speaking of which; you had yet to return his pen back to him. you're about to turn around to go to your backpack when xiao suddenly speaks up too, saying your name.

you don't even have a real crush on him— so why does your figure still, stiffening up at the sound of his voice casually saying your name?

"yeah?" you question. is he going to say you're welcome, or something nonchalant like it was nothing? you look at him expectantly while waiting for his answer.

and then out of nowhere: "i thought you liked me."

you completely freeze up as your heart feels like it comes to a complete stop, the mop handle falling out of the palms of your hand as your mouth opens with no words coming out. the male in front of you bends down and expertly catches the mop before it can fall and hit your leg, your figure still in a shocked state.

how did he know? did lumine tell him? there's no way she would— you know that she doesn't want to believe your lie, wanting you to admit your original crush already. besides, even if you really did have a crush on him, your best friend wouldn't be a snitch. xiao just watches as the your startled look turns to one of utter confusion, your fingertips touching when he places the mop back into your hands.

"...huh? w-what are you talking about?" you slowly start to speak, yet another nervous chuckle falling out of your lips. was he really just that good at reading you like a book? not only did he notice that you needed a pen from the back of the classroom, but he found out that you fake-liked him. how did he do it?

you're about to stammer out an excuse when he plainly says, "you yelled it out at burger king a few weeks ago. like this—

"ah! h-haha, uhm!!" you stammer to interrupt him, holding out your other hand to stop him from reenacting what you said before and humiliating you further. "i didn't know you were, er, there..."

oh shit. truly, you ask yourself what have you gotten yourself into? oh goodness— out of all the people you could've chose, why did your brain land on xiao? did it have to be xiao? and why did he have to be at burger king the same time and day as you? where would this even get you?

well... an offer for a fake dating relationship, that's what.

and it brings you unfortunately to now, the two of you as the center of attention the next day in the back of the classroom, because xiao had just carelessly and emotionlessly announced to everyone that you had started dating, on this very day. you didn't know he would— all you did was whisper in his ear, asking him a question about the relationship you two would fake that you talked about yesterday.

the only thing you can do is try to keep a calm smile on your face (and absolutely fail while doing it), spine stiffening up as xiao reaches for your hand and casually holds it in his. even as lumine slams open the door and curses out a "no fucking way!" he still holds your hand up, almost like he's rubbing it in her face in a you were wrong way.

the first thing xiao thinks when he holds your hand is that it's warm—almost like you.

your personality is warm, your aura is warm, even the way you speak is warm. you seem to be nice to everyone even if they were annoying, like the people who kept asking what answers you got after the midterms. you throw people's lunch trays away for them when they ask and you once even told him that you could mop the classroom by yourself, which he declined.

he hates it. he doesn't like how kind you are, and how much of a pushover you seem. you let people walk all over you and don't do a single thing about it. it makes his mind go mad.

... but it kind of makes him feel like someone should be there by your side, to protect you. to play the bad guy and tell people to get lost when they try to order you around.

"sorry if i offended you," you had said the previous day after he had put away the mops, his back to the window and you seated in front of him on a chair. you had just explained the whole situation; about lumine and childe, about the crushes, and why you lied. even the way you fidgeted with your fingers in your lap made him want to look away in disgust, but it was you, your voice, and your hands. it was at least a bit bearable. but xiao could already tell from the way you avoided his gaze that you were thinking about a lot of other things— what to say, what to do, and what you shouldn't do.

"what did you want to achieve by lying?" xiao straightforwardly asked as you finally—and awkwardly—looked up to meet his stare. "you don't care if childe dates someone else? are you really going to back down for your friend?"

"um, it's not like that," you nervously say, then quickly add, "backing down, i mean. but either way, i don't plan on dating someone my best friend has feelings for anyway."

xiao ponders for a moment with a hand in his pocket, keeping his eyes on you until you eventually look away to the side. "does your friend believes your lie?"

you chuckle in response. "ah, definitely not." the male notices that you always seem to be laughing whenever your blonde friend is around or mentioned—you guys must be close. you continue to talk while taking your jacket off, "i'm trying to convince her, but she definitely thinks that i still like childe. i just wish we could get it over with."

he thinks, staring at you pull one of your arms out of your sleeves. for someone who seems like a stubborn pushover, your lying was pretty good—when you were rambling about his looks at the staircase, he almost believed you himself. the tips of ears even turn red at the thought of thinking about it again, but he reminds himself that you were just acting. anyway, what would even be the ideal way to get out of this situation? it didn't seem like just insisting to your friend that you had a crush would continue to work.

"want me to help you?"

"huh?" you look up confused from shrugging off your jacket, then put on a little smile. "oh, this? it's okay, i'm done taking it off anyways."

"what?" xiao raises his eyebrow, and something in him almost wants to scoff from amusement as you awkwardly stiffen up from realization. "why would i help you take off your jacket?"

"t-then what did you mean??"

"you don't care what childe thinks, so it's just lucy that's the problem now, right?" xiao simply asks as he steadily leans off of the wall. taking one of his hands out of his pocket, he runs it through his hair to push aside the hair strands in his eyes, staring at you while waiting for your reply.

"her name is lumine," you slowly speak with your eyes meeting his. "a-and i guess?"

"then it's simple." he steps forward and you stop breathing for a moment— his face is only inches away from yours. you can see every speck of golden red in his amber eyes from here, and count all of his raven-green hair strands from his black hair strands. his scent is sweet— something varying between caramel and honey, but you can't put your finger on it.

well, it's not like you have time to anyway. not when you freeze up at his words; "just go out with me."

"w-what?" you jolt in your chair, abruptly scooting back and looking up at him with a start. "what are you talking about?"

this time xiao finally smiles in amusement. actually, not even a smile— it's practically a small, amused smirk.

"lumine will believe you if we're dating."

end of part one.

ending author's note: now i could be mean and just leave it off here, and although i really want to, i'm not evil 🙏 see ya guys in the next one after i write it!

Don’t trust people who aren’t out of breath by walking up the stairs in their school

Oh look at me and my homework 😍. I have so many shit pending rn wtf

🌻 a sunflower for everyone who is not feeling well today