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hii! can i request some headcanons about reader / mc comes out to the brothers as nonbinary? i'm really confused with my whole gender identity and it's really frustrating but your works keeps me grounded.

ʕ ̳• · • ̳ʔ

/ づ♡ =͟͟͞͞♡

coming out to the brothers as nonbinary

includes: the brothers x/& nonbinary!mc (no pronouns specified)

wc: .7k | rated g | m.list

warnings: implications of transphobia (NOT from the brothers), threats of violence (NOT towards you)

a/n: thank you for requesting and i’m glad my blog is a safe space! i myself am a cis female so please correct me if anything i wrote blatantly harms or misrepresents the trans/nonbinary community. homophobes and transphobes dni. my inbox is open to chat or request!

pls reblog :))

➳ lucifer nods, tapping his chin. “thank you for telling me. i’m glad you feel comfortable enough to confide in me. i’ll do my best to use your preferred pronouns from now on.” you’re still a little nervous, and he notices. taking your hand, he squeezes it softly. “hey. i’m sure everyone else will have the same thoughts on the subject as i do. if you don’t want to tell them and keep this between us that’s fine too. and if you don’t know yet, that's perfectly fine too. i’ll be here for whatever you decide whenever you decide.”

➳ mammon accepts it pretty easily. “nonbinary, huh? that’s cool. if i mess up and misgender you punch me or something. i’ll try my best though, so i hope it doesn’t happen.” nudging you in the side, mammon grins. “am i the first one you told? oh that’s awesome! i knew i was your first man!” even with all of his celebration he doesn’t miss the way your shoulders untense, the way you let out the breath you were holding in. for once, mammon chooses to be tactful and doesn’t mention it, simply carrying on with his bragging.

➳ levi literally could care less. not like that though, ok? he’s just online quite a bit so he has more experience in LGBTQ+ spaces than his brothers do, meaning he’s pretty used to people coming out or questioning their gender or sexual identity. “that’s really cool! that’s for telling me! this is just like a show i watched called ‘my favorite person came out to me and i still love and support them wholeheartedly’!” he tells someone in his headset to hold on a moment, he’s busy, shooting you a grin while he does so. “what pronouns do you want me to use, again?”

➳ satan has heard of this nonbinary thing, of course, but hasn’t really had any actual experience with someone who identified as it. he wants to be as respectful and accepting as he can be and resolves to do some in-depth research the moment he gets a chance. “thank you for telling me, mc. i’ll do my best to use the right pronouns and refer to you as you wish to be referred to, so please, do not hesitate to correct me if i get it wrong.” looking over at you, he has an idea. “do you have any websites or anything i can look at? i want to be the best ally i can.”

➳ asmo just rolls over to face you, tracing a finger down your cheek. “that’s cool! thanks for telling me.” at your confused expression (you had expected more of a reaction), he laughs, flapping a hand in the air. “what, you think you’re the first person to come out to me? i’ve had countless people i’m close to over the years experiment with their identities. gender is such a fluid thing, and it changes so much with each new decade. i’m glad to see people becoming more accepting than they have been in the last few centuries, though.”

➳ beel is serious about the situation, cutely so. “thank you for telling me. i’ll do me best to support you and use the right pronouns.” pulling you into a warm hug, he holds you for a moment, soothing all of your frayed nerves. you lea into his touch, grateful for it. “and,” he whispers lowly in your ear, “if anyone gives you a hard time over it let me know. i’ll take care of it. and them.” a moment passes, silently, and then he’s pulling away from you, smiling like he hadn’t just threatened to do… something to people who wouldn't respect you.

➳ belphie admits he’s a little out of touch on current human matters like this. cheeks red, he has you explain in greater detail, nodding when he finally gets it. “oh that’s fine. thanks for trusting me enough to tell me. i’ll do some looking into it and educate myself. and i’ll definitely try my best to use the right pronouns and stuff from now on.” for once he’s fully alert, normal sleepiness abnormally gone from his expression. “correct me if i get wrong though, okay? and this doesn’t really change anything between us, so don’t worry about it.”

© leviathans-watching - all rights reserved. please do not repost, copy, or claim as your own

dating headcannons | mitsuya

warnings: hella fluff, cussing, kissing, one manga spoiler, mention of marriage and promise rings.

anon said: “hi hi! i love the way u write tokyorev chars 😭 exactly how i imagine them!! can i request dating mitsuya headcanons 😮‍💨 i love him”

— he absolutely loves to stare at you; he just finds you so fucking attractive.

— huge simp, will always tell you when he thinks you look nice, which is literally all the time.

— “babe, you look good today.” with a lil’ soft smile on his face.

— has massive urges to kiss you damn near every second of every day, has to restrain himself from kissing you in front of other people because he is afraid he’ll make you uncomfortable.

— he always waits for you to get out of class so he can give you a ride home.

— every time you walk out of your last class of the day, there he is. his head leaning against the doorframe as he smiles gently, his eyes racking up and down your body to get his daily dose of you.

— he is genuinely in love. the softest kind of love known to man, too.

— please hurry up though, he isn’t sure how much longer he can hold back to urge to kiss you.

— will grab you by the wrist and drag you to his bike, the second you guys get off at your destination, he will hop off and plant a kiss on your lips.

— a kiss from you will make his day.

— sometimes he can’t help himself, he is rather clingy.

— he tries to come off as cool and nonchalant, but he might subconsciously wrap his arms around your waist when in the middle of a conversation.

— next thing he knows, his chin is hooked over your shoulder and his face nuzzled in your neck.

— would apologize afterwards, praying you say it’s okay so that he won’t have to feel guilty for doing it again. and yes, he will do it again.

— he is so used to taking care of others that sometimes he wishes there was someone to take care of him.

— he won’t ask for much, but the two of you develop a weekly tradition in which you sit down on the couch and lean back so that he can lay in your arms and place his head on your chest. he likes it when you give him gentle praise, he needs to hear that he is doing good.

— the first time you told him so while he laid in your arms, he got really quiet and then teared up a bit. you laughed at him and wiped his tears and he was just so in love, clutching your hand to his cheek and rubbing his thumb over the back of your hand. he would smile to play it off, but he definitely needs this.

— don’t keep him waiting. he isn’t the type to complain but it does bother him when he can’t get to you whenever he wants.

— you likely have a pair of matching earrings, whether they are clip-on or actually piercings.

— he is super into matching accessories and couple outfits.

— please don’t say no to him on this, he really wants to wear a couple’s outfit with you.

— may or may not bribe you with food.

— you know he can cook now 👀 he will use that to his advantage.

— be prepared to be teased by his little sisters. they may laugh and joke about you and mitsuya, but they genuinely like you and think you’re good for their big bro.

— don’t let them catch you treating him badly though, they probably inherited dem hands too 👊💥

— mitsuya likes music, he probably has a custom mixtape that the two of you listen to whenever you’re together

— might eventually give you a promise ring if he can afford, definitely wants to marry you

— doesn’t care if you can’t cook or clean, he already promised to do it all, but he would appreciate if you helped every now and then

— tries to keep you away from the gang for your own safety but fails because mikey is a nosey son of a bitch.

— if mitsuya likes you, the rest of toman will too.

— you and hakkai probably besties low-key.

— you and hakkai probably gush about mitsuya behind his back ...right in front of his face. he just sits there like, “😐, can I get my significant other back? you’re wasting our time together.”

— probably prevents hakkai from coming over whenever you’re around solely to keep him from stealing you away tbh.

— sometimes mitsuya listens to you talk about your future together and he just sits there and smiles in awe, stars in his eyes when he thinks about how in love he is with you

— so in love that he embarrasses himself. sometimes he thinks about his feelings for you and just cringes, like “damn, I’m down HORRENDOUS.”

— will fight for you, don’t even have to ask.

— when you two go shopping, he may purposefully tell you that he thinks something that looks decent on you looks bad solely to get you to wear something he likes more instead.

— he’s a softie though, eventually breaks and tells you that he lied and that you look great in everything.

— better yet, he probably wouldn’t even let you buy anything. he might take a liking to making clothing for you.

— he’d be so fucking smug if he saw you wearing one of his designs.

— ⚠️manga spoiler⚠️ and when he becomes a designer, best believe you will be his one and only muse and his most favoured model.

— when y’all get married and yes, WHEN because it will happen. mitsuya will design your wedding outfit, don’t try to talk him out of it.

## GETTING HANMA’S TATTOOS AFTER HE DIED

tw: angst, death, mentions of needles, smoking

you remember talking about getting matching tattoos with hanma at least once, your lover joking that if you wanted ones on the back of your hands like his he’d have to knock you out while they did it in your sleep but there you were, in the tattoo parlor alone and gritting your teeth while the needle dug into the skin of your hand.

what hurt more than the pain of getting the tattoo was daydreaming about how he would react to seeing you like this, a wide cocky grin while your free hand held his to brace the pain. he’d make fun of you to distract himself from how hard you were holding him while you curse at him, yell even, not caring that you were in a public place. hanma was a piece of shit, but he was your piece of shit and god did you miss him.

sometimes you think getting the tattoos were a bad idea ‘cause with every passing day, your hands would look more and more like his. you’d hold a cigarette in between your fingers even though you didn’t smoke, trying to remember what he looked like smoking right next to you and waving the cigarette around as he talked.

there was always a whiff of tobacco whenever he’d touch your face, so you’d crush it in between your fingertips to get the smell to stick. his hands were rough like sandpaper too, so you’d scratch them, rub them up against a rough surface to dry them out.

now you realize getting the tattoos were a bad idea. you came to that conclusion when you’d look in the mirror and touch your face, crossing one hand over the other so your left palm touched the right side of your face and vice versa. with the smell of tobacco, the roughness, and the tattoos to complete it all, it almost felt like he was holding you.

you’d do it often, your left hand cupping your right cheek and stroking it with your thumb.

but no matter how many times you closed your eyes, how hard you imagined it, how many cigarettes you’ve smoked, hanma wasn’t coming back.

Important notice.

I know some of ya'll would think why I never write here, its just idk man I lost my fair share of interest in writing, beside this fucking blog of mine is literally memory rummage of my 2021-2022 self and idk I just feel weirded out when I looked back at it.

And beside I'm sorry but I'll be archiving this blog and yes I'll be moving blog, to where? Idk not telling hehe, if you see this just think of it as a silly grave for xevrq.

And yes I'll still be reblogging shit on here, have a nice day.

Credits to ANEHONI on pixiv

You know. I just got really sad and got a angst idea looking at this.

Warning: commandant's death, blood, Idk how sad it will be but sad. Thats all I can tell you.

It's honestly the only thing I can think of right now

You get dispatched with the gray ravens to a mission. And it's harder then you expected it to be.

Or rather. You just underestimated the corrupted. You were completely surrounded and lost liv and lucia on the way in

You and lee were slowly losing time and room to escape. All escape routes being blocked off by the corrupted. It's like they knew what to do.

While you didnt worry much about lucia and lick since they had already transferred their MIND back to HQ what concerned you more was Lee. If he started the process now he would surely be interrupted and by how the corrupted has been moving right now his inver device would be destroyed in an instant

You being you. Wanted a simple thing. For Lee's MIND to make it out safely.

The two of you tried to keep your distance from the corrupted which was successful but be as successful for so long

"Lee. Start your MIND transfer process."

"What?"

"Start your MIND transfer process."

"Why."

"Start it. Now. Do it while we have time. If they get any closer I'll deal with them. Just trust me and start it."

Lee knew what was happening. The corrupted closing in, blocking out all passageways, the commandant ordering him to transfer his MIND to HQ?

Commandant was planning on staying behind while lee was safe

"I cant do that. My job is to keep the commandant safe while the mission is completed or failed. I cant leave you behind."

"Does it look like a situation we can argue in? Lee. Just shut the fuck up and please do as I say. Just right now. Please."

Lee looked at you in shock. It was the first time you had ever talked to him in such a way. But he understood why

Under such a pressure of losing someone and danger slowly closing in. You can only hope for the best and wish that some things would work. And the something is for Lee's MIND transfer to be successful

"I'm sorry commandant..."

He truly was. He promised himself that he would protect you. But here he was. Fleeing all by himself while the commandant bleeds out fighting to keep him save.

"I swear. I swear I will come back for you. The moment it gets transferred. I'll. I'll come back for you commandant."

You looked back with a smile. "I'll be waiting then. Dont take too long."

He narrowed his eyes. He wanted to tell not to say such things. But he couldnt. The transfer was complete and now there was only the shell of a frame left behind. You were now there alone without help. The chances of you being shredded to pieces were high. No. You most likely were by the time he got to you.

But.

Who is this that hes thinking of right now?

What?

What was he even thinking about. He should be focused on getting back to work and polish his weapons and get ready.

"Lee. Theres no time to polish weapons and repair parts, we have to go back down and retrieve what we can and continue our mission there."

"Mission...?"

"Lucia I think the reboot process for Lee ended up in him losing parts of his memory."

"I dont think that matters at the moment. If it's a mission we need to carry it out and take care of it. Let's not waste time and get to it."

"Lee? Do you know where the commandant and you were last at?"

Lee looked at lucia in confusion. He didnt understand. The last time he had seen commandant was in the previous mission. But after that... was nothing. He couldnt remember anything. At all. The reboot process really wiped out his memory from the current mission. How awful.

"No I do not. But if the commandant is missing we should hurry and find them."

"Let's go."

Upon arriving at the scene they came across the battered and empty frames of lucia and liv. Many corrupted lay broken and defeated. The more deeper they entered the more corrupted they found. Just what had happened here...?

Clearing out all corrupted they came across they finally reached the last room they have yet to search. Lee stared. Why did this room feel familiar? Was he here before? While he was still a human...?

When they cautiously opened the door, the three of them were hit with the strong smell of blood. Human blood.

What laid in the corner was their commandant. And a broken down frame of lee. Surrounding them was the many dead frames of the corrupted. Each and everyone of them with a bullet through the head.

"What... took you all so long... I thought I was going to die... taking down all of these one at a time... you better carry... me out of here..." you let out a bitter laugh with a sigh as you closed your eyes

Lee felt proud that commandant had defended themself very well but that didn't last long as liv inspected the commandant's injured body.

Well. There was no point in doing so. The large pool of blood should explain almost everything. You had just finished bleeding out. Just how he thought you would.

He knew you would bleed out if he left you here, yet.. and order was an order... he couldnt disobey. But... would it have hurt to disobey that one time? It's all flooding in. The mission. The task. The objective. Lucia and liv.

Then commandant. He had left them to die. Here. If he had disobeyed maybe. Maybe it would have been him and not commandant.

Approaching the now lifeless body he lifted up the body by its shoulders. Pulling it into a tight hug. One that the body would not be able to return. This was the last one he would give you.

Pulling away from the body. He picked up the body and carried it out.

Know what lee was doing lucia and liv searched the room for retrivals

Soon lucia and liv exited the site to see lee has finished burying you. He didnt want to take you back to HQ. He couldnt pinpoint exactly why... but he didnt.... he couldnt.

He ruined the promise he had with you. Broke it. He promised to himself that he would protect you and look at what happened. Now you just lay under the ground. Cold. And lifeless.

All because he obeyed the orders from a commandant. If he had ignored the commandant title and stayed with you, then maybe he would have been able to stall time for you. It could have been him and not you...

I have a fat fucking feeling I fucked this over but like. I really wanted to write this out because holy shit this has been with me for the longest time. Sorry if this was scuffed as shit I really just want to put this out here and like just wanted to see what kind of end I would come down to.

To summarize what happened, the gray ravens left for a mission that they had underestimated. This ended up in the entire time having to transfer their MIND to HQ to keep it safe while their inver device were still intact. All three were successful but you ended up dying through exhaustion and just bleeding out. Lee had internally promised to himself that he would protect you and at that moment had made another promise that he would come back for you. Which he failed both. You died and he came back too late. In that temporary moment of leaving HQ and back to the mission his MIND reboot had caused him to lose the entire memory of the mission. He forgot everything. What happened. And especially you. After getting a little memory jog of the mission site and you the brief moment of memory loss went by and he regained the memories. They arent pleasant at all. Not at all. If he would he would just not remember it. In the end he let's you rest but not in the HQ. In Earth. At the end he regrets making promises and just obeying the commandant's orders. He wishes that he didnt see you as a commandant at that moment and sae you as someone to save.

I'm sorry again for the fact that this was scuffed. I'm not the best at writing and I tend to just throw out whatever just comes to mind and this is probably going to be one of the best examples of it. Anyways. Have a good day/night.

Happy Birthday, Diluc!

Thank you for your gift, it's beautifully packaged. That's very kind of you.

Things are pretty quiet at the Guild today. I'm not sure if it happens to be an idle day or if they set aside the day for me.

Well, let's go then. It happens to be the fresh fruit season and there is a beverage recipe I would like to try. Please do me the honor and join me for a drink. What you think always matters to me.

SEASONS OF BLOSSOM. [0.1]

love can start anywhere, even if yours started out fake.

genshintoon event hosted by @stellumi. img creds: "seasons of blossom" on webtoon.

part 1 (here!) — part 2 [wip]

pairing: xiao + gn!reader // word count: 4.4k // au: fake dating + high school // warnings: fluff, some swearing, reader's height not specified, very slight chilumi but not really (i just needed a character that was shorter than xiao that might like childe, also it's onesided)

author's note: as a writer who only writes fluff, i could not resist a fake dating au with xiao, especially if it's inspired by seasons of blossom. thanks to vera for letting me join this collab! you don't have to really read the webtoon series beforehand to read this, but it is recommended to better understand it! (if you do so, you can just glance at episode 2 + 3 to get a general idea ^^) this work is inspired off of "seasons of blossom" with many events changed, but otherwise i hope you all enjoy!

you like childe just a tiny bit, but you didn't think it was obvious or shown in your expressions at all. while he is seen as a friend of you and lumine, everyone in your class seems to nag at you and talk about how cute of a couple you two would be.

"you see... i like childe too," the girl across the table from you shyly says, and your mind blanks out—who was she again? she sat behind you in class, right? you weren't sure why you were sitting with her and her friends, just being waved over to their table as you and lumine had decided to go to burger king together for your lunch break.

you can hear lumine from beside you letting out a frustrated huff as the girl continues. "i don't really stand a chance of dating him, so just being friends with him would be nice!" your back visibly stiffens when her eyes move to look closely at you. "... but since you're close friends with childe, i wanted to ask you for help. would you be okay with that?"

"oh..." you awkwardly start with a chuckle. "we're just friends, so it really isn't my place to do, uhm... that. i'm not sure if i would be any help anyways."

"of course! you would be super helpful," the girl obliviously cheers and you're not sure if she even noticed your hesitance. "since i'm not really asking for much, can you introduce—"

"no," lumine coldly interrupts, and you sweatdrop at her sudden straightforwardness. she slams her phone down onto the table and all the girls across jolt in surprise. "we're not in elementary school, so why are you asking my friend for help to talk to someone?"

"w-what? why are you being like that lumine?" the girl stammers out while shaking her head. "[name] should be fine with it, so why—"

"because i like him too."

what? everyone around the table turns to lumine in surprise, especially you. she crosses her arms and holds her head up high, continuing with a deadpan look on her face. "i like childe too. so, no."

you can't help it—you yelp out in shock. "wait what?! you like childe? since when?"

"not for long." lumine simply says. "i don't think everyone heard you yet. should i get you a megaphone?"

you mumble out a little oops and a sorry, covering your mouth with your hands. you had no idea that lumine liked childe too—was she joking or just lying for fun?

"w-wow!" the girl's voice from across the table makes you turn to her. "you guys are best friends liking the same guy... what are you two going to do? what if [name] dates childe, lumine?"

your mind races—no one truly knows that you like childe a bit too, it hasn't been confirmed at all. and even if he did return the feelings (which unbeknownst to you, he did), could you do that to lumine and date him in front of her? your heart solemnly skips a bit in your chest, thinking what were these girls doing butting into other people's businesses anyway?

"i think there's a misunderstanding here," you start to speak up, and it's their turn to turn to you instead. "i... don't like childe."

"what?" you can see in your peripheral vision that lumine raises her eyebrow in confusion.

seeing that the other girls are confused too, you continue with the lying. "childe is my friend, yes—but i don't like him romantically like that."

"wait, really?" your classmate leans forward in her chair in absolute bewilderment. her hands palm down onto the table to hold herself up. "then who do you like, if not childe??"

ah, shit. you force a smile as your brain tries to list the people that have nothing at all to do with you. can you really lie your way out of this?

yes, you will, you make yourself think. do it for lumine.

without anymore stalling, you laugh out an awkward chuckle while scratching the back of your head. "i, uh... x-xiao! i like xiao!— you know, the guy who sits at the back of the class?"

while lumine abruptly sits up and yells at you a shocked, "no way in hell!" you can only sheepishly grin and hope that everyone will just believe you and forget about it in a week's time.

little did you know, the very guy that you mentioned is sitting at the table right behind yours— grimacing as his friend beside him (who was listening in on your conversation) spits out their drink at the sound of xiao's name.

you don't know what you have gotten yourself into.

(press "keep reading" to continue!)

"i still don't believe that you like xiao," lumine straightforwardly states. the two of you are standing at the staircase by your classroom, backs to the wall with her standing beside you. "really? the short guy who bumped into us last week?"

you can't help but giddily laugh, remembering what had happened. "well to be fair, i bumped into him first." it was true, you remember the day like it was just this morning.

both you and lumine walk out of the room at the start of your new semester, full of new classes, new teachers, and especially new classmates and students. she links her arm comfortably with yours as you two walk into the hallway. "holy crap, everything is so confusing. how are you and childe so settled in already?"

you can't help but giggle at her words. you open your mouth to respond when you suddenly feel your shoulder hit someone, and you turn to see a raven green-haired boy's head down to look at a game on a phone. one of his friends yelps out, "noo! i died!"

"sorry! are you okay?" you worriedly ask even as lumine still drags you along. you hold out your other hand to tap on the male's shoulder and he turns to you with a blank look. "hello?" ...what was his name again? "sorry for bumping into you—"

"it's fine, it's not my account anyway," the male calmly responds as his friend cries out something about losing a legendary item. your eyebrows only raise higher in concern.

"oh.. really? i'm still sorry, i didn't see you—"

"oh, forget it already!" lumine sighs out, exasperated as she keeps pulling you along. "you don't have to apologize so many times! and it's not your fault you couldn't see him, he's tiny as fuck!"

"l-lumine?!" you call out in surprise as you walk with her down the hallway. "how could you say that?" she only ignores you, continuing ranting about how rude they were for standing in the middle of the hallway. you turn around to look at the male and his friends while hoping that they weren't too offended.

you watch as the green-haired male only stares at you walk away, his friends hovered around him (and also above him, they're taller) while they hold out their hands with concerned looks, probably telling him not to think about what lumine said. you feel a bit bad, even debating going back to apologize for your friend's words when you see his mouth start to open to say something.

"hey," he calls out, and you can see lumine's head turn from beside you. the look of shock completely cascades over your face when he continues to say, "girl who's tinier than the guy who's tiny as fuck. you should grow yourself some common courtesy, it looks like you really need it."

"i still have no idea why you held me back from socking a punch to his face, that little idiot!" lumine's scoff brings you back to reality. you watch as she sips from a box of strawberry milk while her eyebrows narrow. "and by the way, i was lying about liking childe yesterday. i just wanted to say what that girl would say... you get what i mean, right?" she sighs out when you shake your head with a confused look. "you can drop the act, i know you like childe."

well, you confidently think. unfortunately for her, i'm not thinking about backing down anytime soon. "it's nothing like that, lumi. i was being honest, i really do like xiao."

"arghh!! don't say it again, you weirdo!" she cries out, and you giggle. "what's so good about him anyway?! i honestly don't get your type at all."

"he's cute," you speak truthfully— and technically, you were not lying. "his hairstyle suits him, and the way some of his hair strands wave around his face look really pretty." you do a quick motion with your hands to demonstrate and lumine raises her judging eyebrows at you. "and he always has this attractive red eyeliner on that matches his eyes perfectly, and—oh! and his lean figure fits his motorcycle jacket so satisfyingly to me. it's like he's those guys who are hot, pretty, and cute at the same time, don't you think?"

"no! stop rambling dummy!!" lumine visibly reddens, and you were sure that the last description you mentioned reminded her of her crush. you laughed as she spoke, "he's rude and brash! and super short!"

"hmm, kind of reminds me of someone," you funnily teased as the bell rang, and lumine whacked you lightly on the shoulder. "we should head back to class, that was the bell."

"you're such a fucking weirdo," lumine grumbled as you two walked down the stairs to your class floor. you could only keep giggling in return at her words, holding out your hand to take her milk box to throw away.

yet again, out of your notice and vision there he was; xiao at the top of the stairs, leaning against the wall as he looked down at his phone. his friends freaked out and fumbled from beside him, staring at him with a perplexed look.

"what are you going to do, xiao?" one of them, chongyun, asked. a blush was on his face just hearing you talk adoringly about xiao. "our classmate likes you!"

"what do you mean?" xiao simply replies with the phone still in his hands. "i'm gonna defeat this boss, that's what. that was just the warning bell."

"that's not what yunyun means!" hu tao, xiao's other friend, cries out. "remember when i spat out my drink at burger king at our classmates talking about you and childe?"

"yeah, very clearly," he sourly says. he remembers that they weren't really talking about him though—he was only mentioned when you brought up your crush on him.

hu tao ignores his words while ranting on. "that person already said that they liked you! twice! do you not care, oh-mighty nonchalant god?"

xiao only responds with a, "they have a name you know." he turns his head towards chongyun, motioning towards the phone in his hands. "you're on low health, yun."

the blue-haired male completely forgets about the conversation beforehand as he yelps out, "wait-wait-wait, drink a healing potion! that one! quickly!"

hu tao groans. "you two are so clueless!"

hu tao might be half right... but it seems that nobody notices the tips of xiao's ears blazing red, him standing between his friends looking over his shoulder at the phone. your words are still ingrained into his mind as he has to repeatedly take in your words and realize what you had said over and over again... do you actually like him?

ever since april and spring had started, new students were assigned the duty to clean the classroom once the school day was over so the old students from winter didn't have to do it anymore. unfortunately for lumine, your name was called along with the other names, meaning that you couldn't hang out as much after school anymore. you also felt a nudge on your shoulder from the girl (from burger king) who sat behind you, giving you a thumbs-up and a whispered "good luck!" when xiao's name was called as well. you two were stuck on mop duty while childe and zhongli did dusting and amber and yoimiya were on broom duty.

"we should probably come later next time since we have to mop after the brooms," you spoke awkwardly, gripping the handle of your mop to your chest as you stood beside xiao in the back of the classroom. everyone else seemed to lively clean the room together as you two were quiet, xiao on his phone while you guys waited for everyone else to finish together.

the only thing he said in return was a "yeah." and it was silent once again after that.

then came midterms— meaning the students didn't have to clean after the day was over until midterms were over. you quickly gazed at the questions of your paper as the teacher called out instructions, your hand reaching for your pencil bag until you realized you didn't have the right pen the teacher mentioned beforehand. you calmly scooted to the side of your chair and tapped on lumine's shoulder, who sat diagonally to the left and front of you, and she turned and raised her eyebrow at you.

"oh shit, i don't have an extra scantron pen," lumine silently cursed after you told her your problem. she pondered for a while with a finger tapping her chin. "if you want, i can ask the teacher for you—"

"no-no, it's okay," you quickly whispered with a smile. "i'll just ask around, thank you lumi."

she sent you a worried look and a good luck thumbs-up as you leaned back into your chair. swallowing your nerves, you turned around and asked the girl behind you, "hey, do you have an extra scantron pen?"

she shook her head with a sad look, "sorry, i only brought one. maybe ask kyun?"

well crap, you didn't know who that was. you just simply nod your head and whisper a small thank-you before turning back around with a sigh. even if the teacher would scold you in front of everyone, you would just have to ask her if you could borrow one. it didn't seem like there was another way out of this situation.

however, right as you are about to raise your hand, you see a subtle hand out of the corner of your eye place a pen (the exact pen you needed) at the side of your desk. your eyes can't help but widen in shock— everyone you asked didn't seem to have an extra pen, so how did someone else notice that you needed one?

"xiao!" the teacher calls out, and you turn to look up at him with surprise and a little guilt for getting him into any possible trouble. "what are you doing standing up? we are about to start a test."

"i accidentally dropped something," he calmly replies, holding up his other hand with a pen in it. "i need it for the test."

everyone's eyes seem to fly to xiao's figure, and you freeze up as you definitely feel the eyes of lumine and the girl behind you on you. the teacher sighs as she says something along the lines of ask next time, and motions for xiao to sit back down. when he glances at you as he turns around, your heart literally skips a bit before sending him a thankful look before he walks back to his seat.

lumine's eyes feel like they take a while to leave your face, and for the rest of your test, the only thing you can think about is xiao's sunset eyes gazing into yours— even if it was just for half a second. you couldn't even tell if your warm face would ever cool down until you were done answering all of the questions on your papers.

however, lumine's eyes weren't the only ones on you. hu tao stared at the back of your head in awe, absolute surprised at what had just happened.

xiao, the introvert. xiao, the tsundere. xiao, the quiet, scarily good gamer. xiao, the one hu tao knows very well that doesn't like to interact with people at all, just voluntarily stood up and gave you one of his extra pens. well to be honest— his only pen. xiao had turned around in his seat and ordered hu tao to give him one of her extras, because she "always brings a shit-ton of writing utensils". hu tao could only watch in astonishment when he stood up and put his pen onto your desk, and not only that, but also flat-out lied to the teacher with an excuse.

if hu tao said that she wasn't shocked a little bit, then she would be straight-up lying to everyone's faces.

"it's been a while since we had to clean," you start to say, mopping one side of the classroom with xiao mopping the other side. the fact that it was just the two of you inside with unbearable silence was killing you, and although it would be awkward, starting small talk sounded a bit better than two high schoolers silently mopping together. "how did you do on your midterms?"

"alright," is all he says, and you chuckle nervously in response while continuing with the mopping. you keep your eyes focused on the ground, finally realizing why lumine didn't believe your lie of having a crush on xiao—he's complete opposites with childe. while childe is chaotic and full of life, energy, and fun, xiao is quiet and keeps his hobbies to himself. he doesn't seem to speak up much unless asked to, and he seems to keep an expressionless look on his face. and you told lumine that you were crushing on this guy? whoever believed you probably had their eyes on their ass.

you look up when the front of your mop hits against another one, and meet the eyes of xiao in the process. you guys had finished mopping the room, finally meeting at the same side, but it's like you can't stop laughing to make up for the silence when you're with xiao— a brand new giggle bubbles out of you instinctively.

"we met," you point out the obvious, tapping his mop lightly with yours and then pulling it back to your side with a little aftermath of embarrassment. your head suddenly perks up at remembering something to say, and you let out an ahem before speaking again. "oh and, uh... thank you for lending me your pen last time. it was a lot of help."

speaking of which; you had yet to return his pen back to him. you're about to turn around to go to your backpack when xiao suddenly speaks up too, saying your name.

you don't even have a real crush on him— so why does your figure still, stiffening up at the sound of his voice casually saying your name?

"yeah?" you question. is he going to say you're welcome, or something nonchalant like it was nothing? you look at him expectantly while waiting for his answer.

and then out of nowhere: "i thought you liked me."

you completely freeze up as your heart feels like it comes to a complete stop, the mop handle falling out of the palms of your hand as your mouth opens with no words coming out. the male in front of you bends down and expertly catches the mop before it can fall and hit your leg, your figure still in a shocked state.

how did he know? did lumine tell him? there's no way she would— you know that she doesn't want to believe your lie, wanting you to admit your original crush already. besides, even if you really did have a crush on him, your best friend wouldn't be a snitch. xiao just watches as the your startled look turns to one of utter confusion, your fingertips touching when he places the mop back into your hands.

"...huh? w-what are you talking about?" you slowly start to speak, yet another nervous chuckle falling out of your lips. was he really just that good at reading you like a book? not only did he notice that you needed a pen from the back of the classroom, but he found out that you fake-liked him. how did he do it?

you're about to stammer out an excuse when he plainly says, "you yelled it out at burger king a few weeks ago. like this—

"ah! h-haha, uhm!!" you stammer to interrupt him, holding out your other hand to stop him from reenacting what you said before and humiliating you further. "i didn't know you were, er, there..."

oh shit. truly, you ask yourself what have you gotten yourself into? oh goodness— out of all the people you could've chose, why did your brain land on xiao? did it have to be xiao? and why did he have to be at burger king the same time and day as you? where would this even get you?

well... an offer for a fake dating relationship, that's what.

and it brings you unfortunately to now, the two of you as the center of attention the next day in the back of the classroom, because xiao had just carelessly and emotionlessly announced to everyone that you had started dating, on this very day. you didn't know he would— all you did was whisper in his ear, asking him a question about the relationship you two would fake that you talked about yesterday.

the only thing you can do is try to keep a calm smile on your face (and absolutely fail while doing it), spine stiffening up as xiao reaches for your hand and casually holds it in his. even as lumine slams open the door and curses out a "no fucking way!" he still holds your hand up, almost like he's rubbing it in her face in a you were wrong way.

the first thing xiao thinks when he holds your hand is that it's warm—almost like you.

your personality is warm, your aura is warm, even the way you speak is warm. you seem to be nice to everyone even if they were annoying, like the people who kept asking what answers you got after the midterms. you throw people's lunch trays away for them when they ask and you once even told him that you could mop the classroom by yourself, which he declined.

he hates it. he doesn't like how kind you are, and how much of a pushover you seem. you let people walk all over you and don't do a single thing about it. it makes his mind go mad.

... but it kind of makes him feel like someone should be there by your side, to protect you. to play the bad guy and tell people to get lost when they try to order you around.

"sorry if i offended you," you had said the previous day after he had put away the mops, his back to the window and you seated in front of him on a chair. you had just explained the whole situation; about lumine and childe, about the crushes, and why you lied. even the way you fidgeted with your fingers in your lap made him want to look away in disgust, but it was you, your voice, and your hands. it was at least a bit bearable. but xiao could already tell from the way you avoided his gaze that you were thinking about a lot of other things— what to say, what to do, and what you shouldn't do.

"what did you want to achieve by lying?" xiao straightforwardly asked as you finally—and awkwardly—looked up to meet his stare. "you don't care if childe dates someone else? are you really going to back down for your friend?"

"um, it's not like that," you nervously say, then quickly add, "backing down, i mean. but either way, i don't plan on dating someone my best friend has feelings for anyway."

xiao ponders for a moment with a hand in his pocket, keeping his eyes on you until you eventually look away to the side. "does your friend believes your lie?"

you chuckle in response. "ah, definitely not." the male notices that you always seem to be laughing whenever your blonde friend is around or mentioned—you guys must be close. you continue to talk while taking your jacket off, "i'm trying to convince her, but she definitely thinks that i still like childe. i just wish we could get it over with."

he thinks, staring at you pull one of your arms out of your sleeves. for someone who seems like a stubborn pushover, your lying was pretty good—when you were rambling about his looks at the staircase, he almost believed you himself. the tips of ears even turn red at the thought of thinking about it again, but he reminds himself that you were just acting. anyway, what would even be the ideal way to get out of this situation? it didn't seem like just insisting to your friend that you had a crush would continue to work.

"want me to help you?"

"huh?" you look up confused from shrugging off your jacket, then put on a little smile. "oh, this? it's okay, i'm done taking it off anyways."

"what?" xiao raises his eyebrow, and something in him almost wants to scoff from amusement as you awkwardly stiffen up from realization. "why would i help you take off your jacket?"

"t-then what did you mean??"

"you don't care what childe thinks, so it's just lucy that's the problem now, right?" xiao simply asks as he steadily leans off of the wall. taking one of his hands out of his pocket, he runs it through his hair to push aside the hair strands in his eyes, staring at you while waiting for your reply.

"her name is lumine," you slowly speak with your eyes meeting his. "a-and i guess?"

"then it's simple." he steps forward and you stop breathing for a moment— his face is only inches away from yours. you can see every speck of golden red in his amber eyes from here, and count all of his raven-green hair strands from his black hair strands. his scent is sweet— something varying between caramel and honey, but you can't put your finger on it.

well, it's not like you have time to anyway. not when you freeze up at his words; "just go out with me."

"w-what?" you jolt in your chair, abruptly scooting back and looking up at him with a start. "what are you talking about?"

this time xiao finally smiles in amusement. actually, not even a smile— it's practically a small, amused smirk.

"lumine will believe you if we're dating."

end of part one.

ending author's note: now i could be mean and just leave it off here, and although i really want to, i'm not evil 🙏 see ya guys in the next one after i write it!

childhood best friends to lovers with xiao

ingredients: you have been friends with xiao almost your whole life... but it's the little things that make you realize there's something more.

calories: xiao + gender neutral reader

serving size: modern/highschool au・fluff・hurt/comfort・headcanons・too lazy to do word count rn

how did you guys meet in the first place? it was quite simple, really. it was when you guys were both first graders and the both of your parents were friends! all in all, they brought you over to his place and somehow xiao ended up accidentally throwing a cupcake at your face.

you thought he hated you until he popped up on your doorstep the next day, a single cupcake in his hand. to this day you think it's a pretty funny story and tease xiao for it (he always flicks your forehead and says he wouldn't mind throwing a cupcake at you again)

growing up, everyone usually knew xiao as the quiet boy in class and didn't pay attention to him. you knew him as your best friend with the great spotify playlists and the king of having no sleep. and now you were both in the middle of high school, he still barely got any sleep despite your protests.

it was surprising on how xiao was the one waking you up each day for school, climbing the tree beside your house and knocking loudly on your window. you decided to just leave it unlocked most nights (although once, he woke you up by pouring water on you and you arrived to school with a towel on your head)

days would go by normally. hanging out with xiao, studying with xiao, even having a sleepover with xiao! so when did your heart start to flutter at the sight of him?

was it when he climbed through your window, not in the morning but in the middle of the night? it was when he nudged you awake, telling you about a nightmare he had and apologizing that he woke you up. but you both ended up playing games until sunrise, eventually passing out on the bed with your head on xiao's lap.

or was it when he suddenly stopped walking, delaying the time you would reach some random destination? xiao turned around without a word, bending down and tying your shoelaces for you because it had gotten untied. you definitely remembered him ruffling your hair, telling you to check before you leave the house next time.

or maybe it was when he won that volleyball game! his whole team was cheering but he only smiled when he met you in the school parking lot, a bright expression on your face and you insisting that it was time to celebrate.

but what about that time you were both randomly hanging out at a park playground? a shady guy was around the area and you definitely noticed xiao's hand reaching for yours, pulling you close and convincing you that the other side of the park was much more interesting.

you appreciated xiao. you cared about xiao. you wanted him to be happy. and of course you loved him! you didn't realize that you loved him in a romantic way until your heart dropped at a statement xiao said.

"high school love is a waste of time," xiao scowled, getting annoyed at the amount of people relentlessly pinning for him and suddenly calling him "the hottest in the grade." why were they wasting his time? and being so frustrating?

your heart crushed as you tried to calm him down, telling him to ignore them and that he was right.

was he?

so you kept your feelings to yourself. even when summer came around and it was a hot day, refusing xiao's offer to have his cold drink. you knew he already took a sip and didn't want to seem annoying but he seemed tired of your complaining, eventually shoving (gently!) the straw in your mouth.

the only thing you could think about was that you just shared an indirect kiss with xiao.

despite wanting to confess already, you knew xiao wouldn't waste time on such things and you didn't want to be unfair towards him. even as some girl kept insisting for xiao's number and you instinctively told her that you were his partner, shooing her off and getting a thank you from xiao.

if only it was real.

but it felt real. it felt incredibly real that one day you cried in the rain, the day being extremely overwhelming and you hating it. you let yourself believe that it was real as xiao dropped the umbrella he had in his hand, choosing to hold you in his arms instead and deal with a cold later. you still remember him rocking you back and forth, whispering sweet nothings in your ear and ignoring anyone who walked by.

and then the final straw happened.

this time, you were the one who crawled through his window late at night. the one who received the 3 AM text saying "i got another one." the one who held xiao in their arms as he broke down in front of you the first time, just so tired of his stupid nightmares that almost felt like reality.

you were upset, just as xiao was when he saw you break down before. most importantly, you felt like the both of you didn't deserve this. xiao didn't deserve getting such horrid nightmares while you didn't deserve him. was it even right for you to be his friend in the first place? were you even worth it? you felt like such a waste of time.

it was ironic of you telling xiao to ignore the voices in his head when you listened to yours. and he knew.

so he cradled your face in his hands, even as tears rolled down his face and made you cry too. you finally listened, not speaking a single word as xiao placed a gentle kiss on your forehead and pulled you closer.

"i love you. so so, much. don't ever forget that."

and you didn't. to this day as you peppered kisses all over xiao's face and he slow danced with you in his room. although you could hardly believe that he confessed first and he liked you as well, you were thankful.

here's to many more days with your beloved. cherish them, all the way to the end.

i think you can tell the message is to appreciate people when you can (unless they suck). ilysm and you are worth it, stay strong and hold on!! idc how cringe i sound right now you deserve beautiful, happy things.

ANYWAYS

tags: @noirkkat, @tiny-aroace, @ben6ett, @abyssheart, @starglitterz, @blisschi, @heavensbeloved, @mystic-helena, @kachuuha, @xmellows, @rim0na, @velionqs, @glazelilyy, @yanbub, @urujiako, @adeptusjade, @zaultar @seerie, @blossomiich, @xiaozuha

bold: i can’t tag you for some reason!

i just KNOW i'm gonna regret posting this tomorrow morning but i need something to post so i hope you enjoyed!!