xxsadist0nexx

Latest Posts by xxsadist0nexx

nobody fucking cares about me and i don't know what i'm holding on for

tw sh

Sorry I haven’t been active in a while🖤

I wish it was that easy💔

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BLOCK DONT REPORT PLEASE

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Tw SH

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Some from last night and this morning. I have so much anger and sadness when he ignores me, blocks me, or puts me on dnd. I’ve went to his house when he does that but I’m trying to save myself. I don’t know where to put my suicidal/homicidal feelings. I’m prescribed my panic attack pills but it knocks me out so I can’t take it in the day. This has been the most beneficial since I started yet again. I’m hoping one day it’s deep enough

TW s3lf harm

One month clean... I have first therapy today and i'm stressed out

now we got problems

I’m so tired of having to do this to myself. I feel so much emotional pain only physical pain can help.

Tw

Tw sh

Fake bl00d

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Tw

I say it

Just some sh stuff because I find it aesthetic:))

TW: BLOOD AND SH

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Do you ever feel hollow and empty? Like the soul has been sucked out of you and there’s nothing left?

That’s how I’ve been feeling today, I just wanna be done. Part of me wants to fight and try to do good things for the world and make a change. But I’m just tired, I just wanna take a really long nap because I’m exhausted. I never get a break, and I feel like I’m on autopilot all the time.

I love my scars, they are part of me and my story, they are proof that I survived although it was not easy. I still have demons within me, but I hope there will come a time when I will be happy and free from it all. I'm not ashamed of my scars, I don't hide them, neither should you all either because everyone has a story they've struggled with, but it's proof that we're still here after that all. It is not others business and fuck their looks or comments.

TW SH

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TW: BLOOD.

The only thing that makes me feel alive.

#selfh4rm #cvts #s3lfh@rm #styrotwt #styrocvts #bl@des looking 4 mutuals:)

I don't know how my brain work tbh, it's like "oh today wasn't that bad, I actually feel happy. Let's cut my wrist and see how deep I can go 😁"

jean rhys, good morning, midnight

[text: ‘What happened to you, what happened’ he says. ‘Something bad must have happened to make you like this.’ / ‘One thing? It wasn’t one thing. It took years. It was a slow process.’]

“There are nights I cry so hard that my body aches and I shake and I have to put my head in the pillow so no one hears me. There are also nights I’m happy that you’re happy and I think everything happens for a reason. And there are also nights where I feel nothing at all. But there is never a night that you don’t cross my mind.”

That feeling in your stomach when you realize it’s really over. Your heart just sinks in all the memories, the late-night calls, and all the promises you guys made but you know what’s the worst part? Is that you don’t know if you can do it again.

BPD is exposing yourself to triggering content knowing how it will make you feel, then wallowing when the feelings come and swallow you whole. Self-sabotage, my peeps. Self-sabotage.

sorry for seeing the divine in the monstrous. not my fault.