My Favorite Personal Dragon Headcanon Is That Like Birds They Also Can't See Glass, But It Just Isn't

Started working nightshifts sorting mail awhile ago, and i accidentally got into warhammer because i ran out of normal audiobooks to listen to while sorting packages, so heres some memes about some old robot skeletons going through a divorce i made for my partner in no particular order

Hayasaka is above this nonsense and is silently judging them all from outside the room

My friend got pregnant at 17. Deeply religious family (she would be kivked out if they found out), one night stand, she just could NOT have the baby. Thing is we live in a country where abortion is illegal. Our only option was to illegally buy some pills online and hope they worked and we didnt go to jail

But these are hecking expensive and we needed to rush

So i set up a twitter/fb/insta/furaffinity/etc account and advertised my furry art EVERYWHERE. Im not that good but i said id draw basically anything no matter how weird (not cub art or anything illegal). I got a lot of weird coms (vore, scat, inflation and some i dont even understand) and for two weeks i did nothing but draw weird shit all day. My hand hurt so bad, but i got the money.

We spent a week afraid we'd been scammed and afraid we'd get caught, then a weekend afraid my friend might die once we did the procedure in my house. But it worked

I never told her how i got the money and i never will. Id rather die than tell her i funded her illegal abortion by drawing the wolf from robin hood swallowing robin through his belly button. Im pretty sure she thinks i was a prostitute for those two weeks and id rather her think that

To this day i gift her condoms on her bd as a joke bc im never doing that again

.

AU where Plagg spells out who Ladybug is in pieces of Camembert for Adrien because of a deal he made with Adrien. Adrien enters a lifetime supply of cheese contest on Plagg’s behalf, and wins. Tikki is too impressed that Plagg spelled out Marinette’s full name without opposable thumbs to be mad.

“In King Lear (III:vii) there is a man who is such a minor character that Shakespeare has not given him even a name: he is merely “First Servant.” All the characters around him—Regan, Cornwall, and Edmund—have fine long-term plans. They think they know how the story is going to end, and they are quite wrong. The servant has no such delusions. He has no notion how the play is going to go. But he understands the present scene. He sees an abomination (the blinding of old Gloucester) taking place. He will not stand it. His sword is out and pointed at his master’s breast in a moment: then Regan stabs him dead from behind. That is his whole part: eight lines all told. But if it were real life and not a play, that is the part it would be best to have acted. The doctrine of the Second Coming teaches us that we do not and cannot know when the world drama will end. The curtain may be rung down at any moment: say, before you have finished reading this paragraph. This seems to some people intolerably frustrating. So many things would be interrupted. Perhaps you were going to get married next month, perhaps you were going to get a raise next week: you may be on the verge of a great scientific discovery; you may be maturing great social and political reforms. Surely no good and wise God would be so very unreasonable as to cut all this short? Not now of all moments! But we think thus because we keep on assuming that we know the play. We do not know the play. We do not even know whether we are in Act I or Act V. We do not know who are the major and who the minor characters. The Author knows. The audience, if there is an audience (if angels and archangels and all the company of heaven fill the pit and stalls) may have an inkling. But we, never seeing the play from the outside, never meeting any characters except the tiny minority who are ‘on’ in the same scenes as ourselves, wholly ignorant of the future and very imperfectly informed about the past, cannot tell at what moment the end ought to come. That it will come when it ought, we may be sure; but we waste our time in guessing when that will be. That it has a meaning we may be sure, but we cannot see it. When it is over m, we may be told. We are led to expect that the Author will have something to say to each of us on the part that each of us has played. The playing it well is what matters infinitely. The doctrine of the Second Coming, then is not to be rejected because it conflicts with our favorite modern mythology. It is, for that very reason, to be the more valued and made more frequently the subject of meditation. It is the medicine our condition especially needs.”

from ‘The World’s Last Night and Other Essays’

Picnic

Nino: I FIGURED OUT HOW HAWKMOTH DOES IT! He uses BOLTS!

Gabriel: (literally audibly)

Phrases I bet were said on the Wayne Manor without context.

Duke *looking at Dick while he puts his coffee on the breakfast table*: So you're telling me that superman was your stepdad?

Dick: He was NOT my stepdad.

Duke: HE TOOK YOU AND BRUCE TO BOWILING!

Dick: He was being nice!

Duke: MY BROTHER IN GOTHAM THAT'S A DATE-

Alfred: Master Tim ..... Wheres your spleen?

Jason (To duke): Oh yeah shit you haven't died-and-brought-back yet- So...

Tim: Now if you beat me- It's a hate crime.

Duke (to Jason): See? this is why you died without ever having felt the touch of a woman.

Damian (to Tim): I couldn't care less if your friends are coming over for diner, Alfred the cat it's not leaving this table.

Steph (To Bruce): You just mad because I me and Tim used to make out on the Batcave

Bruce (to Tim): You what?

Damian: ... No I don't care if it's homophobic Iwill break his hand if he touches my Utena collection again.

Jason (to dick): whY IS THIS MF ALWAYS HERE?! DON'T YOU HAVE A JOB-

Tim (to Damian): Have you ever had this days where you feel like nothing

Damian (to Tim): "hAveE yOu eVeR hAd ThEsE. dAyS-" Go find someone who gives a shit.

Bruce (To 29 year old Dick): I will not ask again get out of this chandelier right now-

Bruce (To 10 year old Dick): No I cannot refund you that's not gow it works-

15 Year old Dick (To Bruce): HE'S NOT MY BROTHER ... (To Wally on his phone) Yeah I can't go today I have to watch my stupid brother.

Jason Todd (To a very very scared Bernard): Have you ever killed someone?

Perhaps they ought not to have eaten the dragon. There had been people objecting to it at the time. Surely such meat was poisonous. Perhaps it was even an affront, an insult to some intangible order of nature they ought to honour.

But the city was starving, the siege had gone on too long, and the king's troops were still a week's march away. The scorched earth would be fertile again in time, but right now it was barren. Right now there were mouths to feed. So they changed their crossbows for butcher knives and got to work.

None of the royal commanders asked any questions that could not be answered. After all, their aid had come shamefully late. The dragon's horned skull made a noble gift, a fitting tribute from a triumphant city to its humbled king. Who would have thought to question them?

And none of the townsfolk spoke up, when the first golden-eyed babes were born. Children who grew up barefoot and fearless, clambering over the city's patched and rebuilt roofs like they had no notion of falling, with a strange glitter to their skin when the sunlight hit it just so. No one breathed a word about dragons.

Because soon enough there were deft, young hands taking loaves straight out of the oven, heedlessly lifting iron from the forge, plunging into boiling laundry water. And some of them more wondrous still, wild, warm-skinned youths, with inexplicable knowledge and peculiar remedies.

A blessing, their families said proudly. A blessing after so much hardship. Which it was, in its way. This city would never fear dragon fire again.

Obsessed with this. It’s so true