Black And White Thinking - Blog Posts

you know how people talk about seeing in black and white and when things are more complicated or nuanced then they say its grey? yeah i kinda hate that. life is so much more than greyscale.

i like to think about life in rainbow thank you very much.

i dont believe that the scale of right and wrong, good and bad, is linear. people are SO complicated and the scope of what is possible is enormous.

when we talk about complex topics like politics, trauma, ethics, diversity and disability there are countless factors to consider. youre telling me that makes it grey??? 😭 nonono that makes it a unique blend of all the colours of the rainbow depending on the persons entire lifes worth of experiences.

this dont mean you can excuse your actions by saying its complicated, it can be complicated and still be wrong this is just about readjusting grey to colours

anyways when someone does something you disagree with, instead of trying to think in shades of grey, consider the endless amounts of possibilities there are to create a unique painting of colours representing this persons experiences.

think in colour peeps 🌈

I’m really tired of seeing people broken up into labels of absolutes.

People are not just “good” or “bad”.

People are not a list of labels. 

People are complex, situations are complex.

I know, that makes it a lot harder when you want to just write off everything someone’s ever done as bad – but that’s not how people actually are, and it would do everyone good to stop pretending they are.

I am tired of hearing about the fear people have in putting themselves out there. And it is a scary thing! Putting yourself out there means subjecting yourself to people who want a really good reason to tear you down, who will jump at the first chance to feel “good” by labeling someone else as “bad”.

I reject this. I reject the idea that there should be fear in speaking up and talking about experiences and trying to reach an understanding of a situation.

I’m unhappy to see people spitefully urging others to cut off ties with their friends under the guise of “well, that person’s just inherently bad, so if you talk to them you’re bad too.” That is fucked up. You definitely have the right to let the friend know you don’t want to hear about whoever troubles you, but you do not at all have the right to decide who their friends should be. This includes guilt trips.

Anyway, just try to be more aware of others. Everyone else is a person like you. They might not have the same experiences as you. They might not understand how their words are harmful, or how what they’re doing is wrong. They certainly won’t if you never tell them.

Most people are trying to be good, but they’re going to mess it up sometimes. Try to keep that in mind. Even when people do really fucked up shit, sometimes they are trying to do good. “The road to hell is paved with good intentions” and all that.

Nothing gets solved, no growth happens when you put people into a box from which you’ll never let them escape.

Yes, you absolutely must be careful about people who have tendencies and patterns that are harmful to you. Sometimes people try to overcome those patterns and they fail, and you have to distance yourself from them: that is the sad reality of life. Sometimes though, they can overcome it. But they certainly won’t if the first thing you do is write them off after a fuck up. 

Be sincere. Use your best judgment.