Buddie - Blog Posts
If this is what they do. If this is what they do i might just forgive them.
Bobby's dead, and Eddie's only back because of it, and Buck's been living in his house, and they've both been so lonely, and they know they can lean on each other, and a loss like this is something they've never faced before they don't know how to face it.
And the funeral is beautiful, Athena and the kids keep it together better than the 118 ever could, and there's fucking Tommy, and Gerrard, and all the reasons Bobby's life was made hell before he died and it's too much.
Eddie keeps himself together until they get home and Buck finally allows himself to break. They don't know what to do, there's nothing they can do but comfort each other. The hug doesn't feel close enough, doesn't let them feel alive enough, and Buck's always one to be impulsive when his emotions are too much.
And Eddie asks what he can do, a parallel to when Eddie's life was crumbling around him. He rests their foreheads together, whispers as he still clings to Buck, I'm here. What can I do? and Buck kisses him.
It's not how it's supposed to happen, but nothing about their lives or their relationship has ever been the way it was supposed to. Bobby brought them together over a grenade and it's finally traveled enough distance to go boom. They neither one care if they survive the blast.
And then Buck's phone rings, it's the only thing that separates them. He doesn't want to answer it, doesn't want to let go of Eddie for anything, but it's Maddie, he has to answer it, freaks out that it may be Chim, or the kids, or-
"Bobby's alive."
And they neither one talk about it, neither one acknowledge it, how can they sort out their own feelings when they're running to the hospital to piece back together the family they thought would never be whole again?
i have no idea if they plan to keep bobby dead or if they will bring him back but i know this. eddie will not be going back to el paso after the funeral. sure he’ll go back to sell the house of smth but he’s going to move back. not because of buddie (though that will be a huge win) but because eddie doesnt want to miss anything else. eddie created a life and a family for himself in la. his son spent half his life there and his second dad is there too. eddie will not move back to el paso because bobby dying will remind him of that life he built and him not being there for bobby’s death will remind him that he doesnt want to miss his family anymore
“Can I ask you a question?” Buck blurts out as Eddie pours creamer into their coffee. It’s the algae creamer that Buck uses. Eddie picked it up when he was out grocery shopping last. Even though he was shopping for his house and not Buck’s. Even though he doesn’t use it. Eddie buys a different one for his. Some fancy caramel macchiato type stuff that he splurges on because Frank told him to treat himself and Eddie apparently can only do that with coffee creamer.
“Go for it.” Eddie hums in reply, clicking the tops shut and carrying the creamer bottles to the fridge. He’s wearing old sweats with a hole in the thigh. Bare toes peek out from the bottom. His shirt is old and loose, dipping at the collar. There’s an unknown stain on the chest. He’s got day old stubble growing on his jaw and his hair is sleep ruffled and soft. He looks beautiful.
“Wanna get married?”
Eddie fumbles the bottles, the fridge door open, and his head snaps over to Buck, mouth parted in surprise and eyes wide. He says nothing.
“Look, h-hear me out,” Buck steps forward, rubber spatula gripped tightly in both hands. The eggs he’d been about to cook for them for breakfast remain forgotten beside the stove. “We…we love each other. We basically live together. I’m pretty sure I’ve been helping you raise your son?” Buck releases a slightly manic laugh. “Eddie, I’ve never felt so comfortable or at home with someone. I’ve never known another home like I know yours. I’ve seen you at your absolute worst and your absolute best. The same applies for you with me. And…and we still love each other. We keep coming back to each other. And I…I do. You know? L-love you. As a best friend. As a work partner. As…as my person.”
Eddie is still staring. Mouth open. Eyes wide. Creamer bottles in hand.
“I have loved you since probably the moment I met you. And it’s only grown and blossomed into…” Buck gestures wildly around the room, “This! Eddie. We’re already married. Why don’t we make it official?”
Buck feels like he’s run a marathon when he finishes. His chest rises and falls rapidly. His heart is going crazy in his chest.
Eddie slowly turns, puts the creamers away, and shuts the door. Buck watches. Waits.
And then Eddie is walking towards him and Buck can’t read his expression. He always has known what Eddie is thinking. It’s one of the many things Buck loves about the man.
But right now? When Buck has bared it all out in front of them? He has no idea what Eddie is thinking.
“You…” Eddie trails off, shaking his head. “Buck.”
“I—“
“Am I allowed to at least take you on a single date before you propose?” Eddie cuts him off. And a beautiful smile is lighting up his face. It’s soft and sweet and all Buck’s.
“I…y-yeah. Of c-course.”
“Good.” Eddie sways forward, hand resting on Buck’s hip, and he brushes his mouth across Buck’s. A first kiss. Their first kiss. But it feels like one they’re exchanged thousands of times. “But for the record…yes. I’ll marry you.”
Buck grins back, looping his arms around Eddie’s neck and pulling him back in for another kiss. This one longer and deeper.
Eddie snorts when they pull apart, just enough to look at each other. “Proposing to me and we aren’t even together.”
“We’ve always been a little together.”
“Okay. That may be true.” Eddie grins, “Can you make breakfast now? I’m hungry.”
does everyone remember that one scene where there's an argument about good cop/bad cop parenting and buck and eddie are just sort of standing off to the side. and when someone is like "can't you just both be the good cop" to the parents who were arguing, buck and eddie are (in unison) like Noooo and everyone literally stops saving some guy's life to turn and stare at them. and they don't appear to realize they've said anything strange. okay. so i am rotating that in my mind and i am thinking about how easy it is to assume that buck would be the Good Cop parent in chris's life because it would be easier for him to be the fun dad especially at first when he doesn't have as much of an established role yet. and this is largely true (ie that time eddie has to give buck the You'd Better Back Me Up look when chris is grounded from playing video games or whatever; and btw the implications of that in the sense of like....... eddie expecting buck to back him up. and the idea of buck being empowered to Not back him up if he wanted to. and chris instinctively knowing this enough to do the "one parent said no so i'm going to ask the other parent" thing that kids do. anyway.) Anyway. i think it is largely true that buck is the fun dad but i also think he is sometimes the serious dad. like he is the one who half the time has the Big Talks with chris when something is going on in their family. and also he is definitely the one who made chris eat his vegetables when he was a kid. because eddie is much quicker to say okay :) let's order pizza. when he doesn't feel like cooking. and buck gives him a Look and eddie is like UGH fine. we'll order a salad with the pizza and chris you'll eat some of it. or else. and then proceed to not actually make him eat it. idk. they're a family. yay.
If so, I take it all back. The queerbaiting was better.
is this our price for getting buddie :(