J Hope - Blog Posts
J-Hope ‘Daydream’ MV icons for Twitter + header
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As someone that is really passionate about mental health it has been so infuriating today to see the way that some ARMY have reacted to the video.
These men have given their absolute everything in the past 9 years. I cannot even imagine how hard it must have been and what kind of pressure they have been under.
You can see how hard it was for them to do what was right for them and take some time off and apart. To admit that and pursue that. And the way they said it in the video in such a mature and calm and thoughtful way. They cried and reassured us and each other that BTS will be back and that they are thankful for everything. To then have "fans" screaming how unfair it is/omg are they disbanding/why would they do this/they are a group I don't want solo projects.
Like before they are BTS, these idols you fantasize about and praise and obssess over- first and foremost they are human beings. Humans who have sacrificed so much and finally are putting themselves first.
Also for God's saks: if you actually watched the video and listened you would know that they are NOT disbanding, they are taking a break, focusing on solo projects. (READ their words and listen to what they are saying instead of making assumptions).
Yes, I cried and was sad but I am also so immensly happy and proud!!! I hope they rest and I hope they have fun and I hope they do what THEY want without worrying about the world. And when and if they come back (although they promised and they keep their promises!!) we will welcome them with open arms.
So I beg some of you to get a life and then realize if you actually love them you would be happy for them.
Another reminder: learn from their example. Focus on yourself. Take care and rest when you need to. It is okay to do that. I love you. 💜💜💜
bts incorrect quotesbangtanyoongihoseoktaehyungjungkookvjiminj-hopesugarmincorrect quotesincorrect kpop quotesincorrect bts quotesot7btsnamjinseokjinnamjoon
bts incorrect quotesbangtanyoongihoseoktaehyungjungkookvjiminj-hopesugarmincorrect quotesincorrect kpop quotesincorrect bts quotesot7btsnamjinseokjinnamjoonNamjoon: *falls down the stairs*
Jin: *catches him* I think you just
Jin:
Jin:
Jin: fell for me
Namjoon: put me down
Jack In The Box, album by J-Hope
Notes: It’s time to express some of my thoughts regarding every member’s solo albums and singles. I’ve been putting it off for months. Let’s do it without further delay, starting with the first member to have released his solo album.
1. Intro: 9/10
“It flapped its delicate wings as it danced around Pandora, lightly brushing against her shoulder.”
Basically it’s the story of Pandora in Greek Mythology and the origin of hope in the mortal world. If you haven’t heard it yet, this post is a sign for you to look it up (also check out Ted Ed’s video ‘The myth of Pandora’s box’ for more details). The narration of the story (J-Hope’s intro) is smooth and short. It sounds pleasing to the ears. And it is definitely a unique idea for his album’s intro. I believe what Hoseok’s been trying to tell is that what he is to the Armys is what hope is to all the people on earth.
2. Pandora’s Box: 10/10
“J to the Hope, Jung to the Huimang, Jack in the box”
Only Hoseok can make a fine connection between a myth, a toy and his whole personality and also make total sense. It’s probably my first time listening to a song that is a retelling of a myth. And Hoseok did an amazing job here. The lyrics made my jaw drop, like literally. I said it once and I’ll say it a hundred times, BTS is one of the few artists who knows what poetry truly is. And this song is one of the many living proofs.
3. More: 8.5/10
“My work makes me breathe. So I want more”
The first released song with the music video shook me a great deal like it did to many Armys I’m sure. The sunshine of the group in such a grim-emo kinda look was absolutely out of the blue. Nevertheless, this vibe suits him right. Comparing their passion for making art with an awful addiction is a thing BTS did in their early works too. I can see that theme portrayed from Hoseok’s perspective so well.
4. Stop: 6.5/10
“The only belief that rules over me, ‘There are no bad people in the world’”
The struggle of freeing yourself of the innate nature of being judgmental is portrayed in this masterpiece. Shoutout to Hoseok for speaking about the truth of today's world and people’s values and ethics while still keeping an open mind, making sure not to judge anyone harshly. The lyrics definitely deserve praise. But personally I think it is not a song that I can listen to more than once.
5. = (Equal Sign): 7/10
“Same, the breaths we breathe. Same, the dreams we dream of”
Yes! Sing it, J-hope. Who’s going to give us hope at times of despair if it isn’t you? The change is indeed soon to begin. We’re all in this together. Let’s make a better world without prejudice and hate. BTS, as well as us, the Armys; we believe in ‘Love’.
6. Music Box: Reflection: 10/10
This one is actually brilliant. At first I played it on repeat many times a day. I even set it as my alarm ringtone and it is still there. I know, we shouldn’t be doing that because it makes us hate the music afterwards. But I still couldn’t grow to dislike it. This music has a whole aesthetic to it that makes me imagine myself in a music video everytime I play it.
7. What If...: 8.5/10
“What if I have nothing?”
This one shows what Hoseok has been trying to portray through the whole album pretty directly. You can see him questioning his own personality. Is he really all sunshine and rainbows inside out? I mean, is that even possible for a human? You can hear his passion pouring out in the voice. Chef’s kiss to the bravery of finally speaking out; louder for the people on the back.
8. Safety Zone: 8/10
“In my 20’s, I’m living an endless life”
It hurts when you look up a song and you find the lyrics so sad. The life of an idol is never really easy. People need to keep in mind that these idols are humans too. Give them some break for God’s sake. They talk about their struggles through their songs and yet we fail to see it. I really hope Hoseok finds peace and happiness that he deserves.
9. Future: 6.5/10
“Walking in the future, a step of hope”
The fact that Hoseok worries about his future too shows how much he is like us. After all, at the end of the day, we’re all human. Let’s keep our courage and step forward.
10. Arson: 10/10
“Do I put out the fire or burn even brighter?”
Just think about the poetic effect of the last line of the last song. Even though I liked most of the songs from this album, Arson takes the trophy. The music, the lyrics, the mv, everything is just fine as fine can be. J-Hope never disappoints us with his unique ideas. I’m in love…
Notes: The album is a masterpiece and it deserves all the attention it got and more. Apart from the fact that the music and the beats are all kinda dope, we need to focus on its lyricism too. This album feels like a cry for help. We need to acknowledge Hoseok's struggle as an idol and try to sympathize. Let's try to become the best version of ourselves as fans and let our idols live a normal life while supporting them unconditionally.
Ghost Town
Fandom: BTS Pairing: Hoseok x Female Reader
“I’m not taking any of your shit. Come down at once.”
Hobi could be really stubborn at times. I wondered what he wanted from me now. Didn’t I tell him how upset I was today?
“Ta da!” Hobi exclaimed with joy showing off the new bicycle he had bought.
“You want me to go with you at this hour?” I asked in the most annoyed voice possible.
Hobi didn’t seem to mind at all. He nodded his head with utmost energy and with the brightest of smiles on his lip.
“It’s 3 o’clock!” I shook my watch on the wrist in front of him.
“So, what? It’s not everyday I make a request. Now, c’mon!”
I had to take out my own bicycle and took off with him. It felt like as if I was running away from my home. Running away with my lover to a strange place. No! I actually felt like the opposite. I was running away from the strange world to my home.
“Let’s speed up, shall we?” Hobi called from ahead of me.
“Yeah!” I shouted back, now enjoying every minute of it.
Then we were peddling faster and faster. Around the familiar city with the familiar houses and street lights. But with no people around it, it felt like a complete new place to me. It felt like we were roaming around a thousand years old town, home to only the dead spirits.
“Hobi!” I shouted through the strong wind, as I felt my mood lifting, “Thank you very much!”
In reply he just said, “Oh, shut up!” and sped up even faster ahead of me.
My Masterlist
Red Hope! - Part 7 (Final)
Specially requested by @lelewright1234. Hope you enjoy!
Note: This work is totally fictional and has nothing to do with BTS on real life. I mean no hate toward any person in particular. This plotline was requested. Though I personally hate bullies, I still believe there is hope for everyone.
Fandom: BTS Pairing: OT7 × OC (Leah) Warning: Bullies, clingy behavior, heartbreak etc. Genre: Angst and Fluff Summary: Now that Leah knows the truth, will she end their new found friendship or forgive them for the good times sake?
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 (Complete)
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I confessed to my mother about getting back most of my past memories. Some of them were still blurry. But I was remembering everything eventually. I told mother I wanted to take a break from school for the day. I was still not prepared to face Jungkook or any of them.
After the school was over, both Jin and Jungkook stopped by my house. My mother told them how overwhelmed I felt as my memories came back and that I didn’t want to meet anyone just then.
I had been getting calls after calls from the boys. Some of them even texted me, asking if what my mother said were true. I neither picked up the calls nor replied to them. I had decided it was better to avoid them. I didn’t need any fake friends in my life. Nina was enough.
But I knew, deep inside, I was hurting. It pained me to even think about not talking to the boys anymore. All I knew for the past few months were the boys. They had been in everything I was doing. Without them, I wouldn’t even be able to recover as fast as I did.
I stayed in my room the whole day and cried. I felt like I was broken into pieces and I would never be able to put them together. Every beautiful experience I had with the boys felt like a lie.
Since Taehyung kept calling me non-stop, I thought it would be better to let them know how I felt about them now.
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Taehyung: Finally you’ve answered. What happened, Leah? Are you okay?
Leah: I’ll get straight to the point, Taehyung. It’s true that I’ve got my memories back.
*A pause*
Taehyung: So, you remember everything?
Leah: Everything.
Taehyung: Are you mad at us?
Leah: What do you think, Taehyung? Should I?
Taehyung: Listen, Leah. We’re all really sorry for everything, okay?
Leah: Stop it! I don’t need your apologies. I just want you to convey the message to the rest of the boys. I don’t want you guys near me anymore. Our so called friendship ends here.
*************************************************
The next day in school, I sat with Nina avoiding Jungkook. But he came to sit behind us and started to say how sorry he was for his past actions and that he deeply regretted them now and other stuffs like that.
I said, “You have apologized and I took it. But I still don’t want to talk to you anymore.”
Jungkook still followed me to the cafeteria at lunch break. I was really annoyed at the way he was acting. “Could you please stop following me?” I almost shouted at his face.
“Please, Leah…”Jungkook tried to say something more when I turned to go. Then, he grabbed my hand.
I looked him dead in the eyes and said boldly, “This is the last time I’m going to tell you this, leave me alone.”
Instead of letting go of my hand, Jungkook took a step toward me. That was when I slapped him, really hard on his face. As soon as I did, I regretted it. Some of the students were staring at us by then.
“Leah,” Jungkook’s voice trembled as he looked at me in disbelieve, “You hate me so much, don’t you?”
*************************************************
Jimin had texted me to meet him even if it was the last time I did. I was very upset about the whole school affair. To ease my unsettling brain, I thought it would be better to talk it out.
As I waited for Jimin in the nearby park, I kept replaying in my mind how Jungkook had looked at me after I had hit him. I knew I would never forget that look.
I saw Jimin approaching me from a distance. He brought flowers for me again. He came to me and smiled. Even with the smile on his face, he still looked sad. It was hard to be mad at Jimin. I took the purple flowers from his hand.
“I know how you’re feeling, Leah.” he said and it sounded like he really did.
I started to cry, “Why did you have to be so cruel to me?”
“We’re really sorry, Leah.” Jimin’s voice broke as he struggled to say the right words. “We were stupid. Trust me, if only we knew just how much you would mean to us, we would have never done that.”
“You said you care for me!”
“And we do.” Jimin stepped forward and hugged me. There was a feeling of comfort in his arms. I buried my face on his chest as he gently stroked my hair. “Just trust us this one time and we wouldn’t let you down.”
I nodded. There was no way I could stay away from them. They had become a part of me. As much as I hated to admit it, I knew I loved them.
*************************************************
The boys had arranged a special dinner for me. The reason was obviously to apologize to me officially. I called Nina to ask if she was coming. She said that the dinner was meant for me and she’d better not intrude.
I was having mixed feelings toward the dinner. I kept worrying whether I had made the right decision or not. I felt like I really didn’t have any choice. I loved the boys too much to break off the friendship that was so precious to me.
Even if I could now remember everything, most part of my life I had felt empty. These past few months I had spent with the boys were the most exciting part of my life. No matter how terrible they had been to me before the accident, they had been double nice to me afterwards.
I had put on my best dress to go to the dinner party. When my mother saw me, she literally gasped and said that I looked so pretty. Before I got out of the house, she told me that she was glad that I had finally found the friends I deserved and that she had never seen me so happy before.
Jin came to pick me up since I still didn’t have the driving license. He was awestricken when he saw me. “Leah,” he said, “you look beautiful.” Then immediately he added, “even though that’s nothing compared to me.” I punched him in the arm and got in to the car.
Once I got down from the car, I ran straight to Jungkook and hugged him. "I'm really sorry, Kookie. I didn't mean to hurt you." I said after releasing him from my arms.
Jungkook shook his head and said, "No, Leah. It should be me apologizing to you instead. I AM SORRY!"
"Can we please skip this part?" Yoongi poked his head in between us and gave me his huge gummy smile, melting me right at the spot.
As soon as the other boys saw me they started to shower me with compliments. None of them could deny the fact that I looked beautiful in that dress. I was blushing really hard and told them to stop it.
After some times of talking and fooling around just like the old times, I almost forgot about all the worries I had earlier. Hoseok stood up and declared, "It is now time for the special performance that we've arranged for our precious friend, Leah."
The boys arranged their position to sit facing me. Namjoon said, "This is the song I wrote just for you when you were in the coma."
Then, they started to sing, one by one. It was so beautiful. The music was really soothing. It calmed me right away. And what could I say about the lyrics. It was so heart-warming.
They had admitted their fault of not being good friends to me. They had failed to realize my worth. They had regretted their actions once I was gone. There was nothing in this world that they could ask for other than my forgiveness and the promise of our friendship.
They said those words in the most poetic way and it made me tear up. Once the song was over I hugged them all, one by one. I said that I was so lucky to have them in my life, that I had already forgiven them and that I wished to continue our friendship till death.
We sat at the dinner table and made a toast to our friendship. We ate and drank till our stomachs could no longer take it anymore.
Then, the disco lights were turned on and we danced to the loud music. It was the best night I had spent in my entire life.
Being exhausted, I went to sit beside Jin, who had already given up dancing at that point. We laughed at the other boys doing stupid dance moves.
I rested my head on Jin’s shoulder. "See," Jin said, "I promised, we'd make it up to you, didn't I?"
*************************************************
< Previous
My Masterlist
Red Hope! - Part 6
Specially requested by @lelewright1234. Hope you enjoy!
Note: This work is totally fictional and has nothing to do with BTS on real life. I mean no hate toward any person in particular. This plotline was requested. Though I personally hate bullies, I still believe there is hope for everyone.
Fandom: BTS Pairing: OT7 × OC (Leah) Warning: Bullies, OC suffering from amnesia, racist comments etc. Genre: Fluff and Angst Summary: Leah’s having her best moments with the boys. But would their relationship stay the same once the whispers and rumors start?
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 (Complete)
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It had been some months. I was getting used to the new life without my old memories. I still had some flashbacks. But most of them were confusing and I couldn’t make any sense out of them. So, avoiding them were better. So far, everything seemed to be okay.
I was showered with love and affection from my family. My step father would bring me chocolates, ice creams and other snacks every day when he returned from the office. My mother would often ask me what I wished for dinner.
But the boys were a little too extra. They had been pampering me with flowers, gifts and attention. It was cute but embarrassing at the same time. I would put a few words on their behaviors.
Jungkook would not let me sit with Nina in the class. He would always save a seat for me beside him and Nina had to sit behind us. He would follow us everywhere from the cafeteria to the playground. Slowly Nina started to like him too and now we were kind of a golden trio of our class.
After school I had dance classes at evening where I would meet Hoseok and Jimin regularly. They would come to watch me perform whenever they were free. As I was always late to leave they would wait for me after their practices were over and walk me to my house every day.
Jin would frequently send me special foods that he cooked with his master-chef quality. I would sometimes go over to their house with Nina for dinner. He would also teach me how to cook different items. But cooking with Jin mostly ended up with both of us being frustrated; him, for not being able to teach me and me, for being too clumsy to do it.
Namjoon would lend me his favorite books. We would often sit together and read. Those times we wouldn’t really talk much, but being around him was somehow comforting.
Whenever I was looking forward to having some fun, I would always go to Taehyung. On the contrary, whenever I was feeling down and didn’t want anyone being too loud, Yoongi would be my comfort zone.
Somehow, the boys had grown on me by the time. Now I felt like I wouldn’t be able to be apart from them at any cost. I knew, I would gladly sacrifice myself to save them again just like I did before.
*************************************************
I was aware about the fact that some of the students didn’t like me and they talked behind my back. Nina had suggested me to avoid them and so I did.
But one thing didn’t go unnoticed. Almost everyone would call me and the Bangtan Boys ‘Snow White and the seven dwarfs’. I knew they were probably teasing me because the boys were giving me a lot of attention than needed. But one day I heard a group discussing the matter. “Think about the irony,” one of them said, “a black girl being the Snow White.” Then they started to giggle.
I wouldn’t say that I didn’t care at all because I actually did. By the end of the day, I would sometimes cry myself to sleep thinking about how mean they were toward me.
I told Yoongi about the matter. He remained silent for some time. At last, he said, “They don’t really know you. Don’t let them put you down.”
There was something which was confusing me. And that was the fact that whenever Jungkook tried to defend me they would say stuff like, “Since when are you taking her side?” Jungkook would go red in the face and won’t say anything else.
Jin always gave me a ride home from school since he was in charge of taking Jungkook back home. So, Jungkook and I would always wait for him to arrive. On such an occasion, one day, one boy from our class approached us and started to cut jokes about how I was such a drama queen and that I was just pretending to have an amnesia to get special treatment from the boys. When Jin came to rescue us, the boy asked him, “Are you guys worshipping her as a superhero now?”
That made Jin really angry and he started to scream at the boy. He warned him not to do the same mistake again. Otherwise he would have to say goodbye to his dear legs. That scared the boy off.
I was trying to put the pieces together. Everything seemed to point to the fact that the Bangtan Boys used to be one of them. They had also made fun of me before the accident. But it was hard for me to imagine that. These boys were too kind to me. How could I believe that they were also capable of such cruelty?
I decided I would ask Nina. I had to know the truth. THE WHOLE TRUTH...
*************************************************
I sat motionless on my bed, tears rolling down my cheeks. I couldn’t believe what I had learned from Nina earlier today.
I practically begged Nina to tell me exactly what kind of relationship I was in with the boys before my accident. She told me that the truth might hurt me. But I was determined to know it anyway. And so she told me everything.
I was being bullied by the entire school. When Nina joined, it was reduced a little though not wholly. By the time, people got bored as I kept avoiding them. But the Bangtan Boys had been especially mean toward me and their teasing never stopped until the accident. They had been regretting their acts since then.
Nina told me, “I personally hated them too. But I think they have really changed a lot. That’s why I kept the truth away from you thinking they might deserve a chance.”
I didn’t say anything further to Nina about the matter. I came back home. I couldn’t sleep as I kept thinking about the boys all night. Then, it suddenly clicked. All the memories seemed to be poured down to my brain all at once.
I sat up on my bed, my eyes closed. The last thing I remembered was the scene of the accident.
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< Previous || Next >
My Masterlist
Hobi, You Slay...
I can’t describe how much I’m touched by J-hope’s performance at the Lollapalooza. I don’t know why, but I have been too emotional lately. I never wanted to see anyone perform live, SO BAD, in my entire life. I had, long ago, accepted the fact that there is no chance of a concert in my country of the people I truly love and admire. But seeing J-Hope performing his best songs, in front of so many Armys, made me really sad. Even though I may never have a chance to see him perform live, I still wish him luck. J-Hope really deserves all the praises and love he is getting and MORE. Hobi, Borahae...
Red Hope! - Part 5
Specially requested by @lelewright1234. Hope you enjoy!
Note: This work is totally fictional and has nothing to do with BTS on real life. I mean no hate toward any person in particular. This plotline was requested. Though I personally hate bullies, I still believe there is hope for everyone.
Fandom: BTS Pairing: OT7 × OC (Leah) Warning: Bullies, allergy attack, OC suffering from amnesia, flashbacks etc. Genre: Fluff and Angst Summary: The boys plan to meet Leah one at a time for her to get to know them better...
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 (Complete)
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The doctor had suggested me to stay in the hospital for three more days and to take rest for the whole week even when I go home. The seven boys had made a schedule to meet me one at a time throughout the week. That sounded alright to me since I wanted to know them individually and talking in a group did not allow much opportunities.
*************************************************
Day 1: Hoseok knew the steps too…
I was lying on my hospital bed. Hoseok had been sitting next to me on a chair while humming a song that sounded familiar to me. “What is this song?” I asked.
“Tightrope by Michelle Williams” he replied, “do you remember it? It was your favorite song to do ballet on.”
“It rings a bell.” I said.
He smiled at me and said, “I can’t wait to see you do ballet again.” I smiled back. I couldn’t wait to do it too. I wanted to know the feeling of dancing again.
“Oh, don’t make that face.” Hoseok pouted.
“What face?”
“That Smile-through-the-pain face. It hurts right here.” He put his hands on the left side of his chest to indicate his heart. The cute faces he was making were enough to melt my heart away and I laughed. This time it was genuine.
“Get up.” He said, “I don’t think anyone’s coming to check on you now.”
I did as he asked me to. He turned on the song I knew so well on his phone and came toward me. He took my hands in his. Then, we started to move along the music. We danced and danced. I closed my eyes to feel every beat. Hoseok didn’t need to lead me. I already knew every step of it.
The song ended. I opened my eyes and stared into his, breathing heavily. We were standing too close to hear each other’s heart beating, fast but rhythmic.
*************************************************
Day 2: Jungkook spilled the truth...
Jungkook was complaining an awful lot about how he had missed half of the day because his hyungs had made him go to the school.
“It’s okay.” I said, “We still have enough time.”
“We have time, though,” he said in an annoyed voice, “but not enough.”
I had been pondering over the fact that Jungkook had stopped going to the school since I was in a coma. That sounded like we were very close. Hesitantly I finally asked him about it.
Jungkook’s face turned red as he shook his head slowly.
“No?” I asked, “Then why would you stop going to the school?”
“Don’t you know about the accident?” he asked in a serious voice.
What could the accident had to do with it? I was told that I was hit by a car and ended up being in a coma. But nobody gave me any details about it.
“What about it?” I asked.
“It was supposed to be us.” He said, his voice sad, “me and the boys.”
“Supposed to be?” I was confused.
Jungkook explained how they had been drunk that night. If it weren’t for them, I wouldn’t have ended up the way I did. Jungkook’s eyes were filling up with tears.
“Come on, Jungkookie!” I tried to cheer him up, “I must have cared for you enough to have save you like that.”
“Yes, you did.” A tear fell from his eye, “Only we didn’t do the same.”
*************************************************
Day 3: Namjoon defended the boys...
I woke up hearing a rather loud conversation in the hospital corridor. It sounded like Nina was arguing with someone. I went closer to the door and I could hear what the other parties were saying.
“I can allow some of you,” Nina was saying, “But never Jin and Yoongi. I bet they’re still planning to prank her the way they always did.”
“Nina!” It was one of the boys, but I couldn’t recognize the voice, “We’ve talked about this. I promise you, nothing’s going to happen to her. We’ve learned our lessons.”
“I don’t trust you.” Nina snapped back, “You guys are capable of anything.”
“Alright!” he sounded exhausted, “How about we talk about it later, this evening? Does that sound good?”
There was no reply from Nina. I could hear footsteps approaching my door. So, I quickly ran toward my bed, grabbed a book from the table and sat there pretending I was reading.
Namjoon opened the door and as soon as he met my eyes, his grim face broke into a smile. I smiled back at him, not knowing what to do otherwise.
“Are you done with that one?” he pointed at the book I was holding.
“Just a little bit left.” I lied, though I had already finished reading it yesterday.
“Here,” he handed me the book he bought with him, “I hope you’ll like this one.” It was ‘Me Before You’ by Jojo Moyes. I took the book and thanked him.
I didn’t want to talk to him. I was too confused about the conversation that I just overheard. Somehow, hearing Nina not being able to trust them made me question their behaviors. Why were these boys being so good to me?
To avoid Namjoon, I pretended to read my book. He seemed to have understood that I was not in a mood to talk. He patiently waited for me quietly. After an hour, when I was still not paying any attention to him, he rose up.
“I’ll get going, then. Enjoy the book while you’re still here. They’re gonna release you tomorrow. So, good luck!”
*************************************************
Day 4: Jin made a promise...
I felt really bad the whole day once Namjoon was gone. I felt bad for suspecting him. He was such a gentleman. There was no way, he would try to hurt me. I thought of taking a chance to meet the boys and get to know them by myself. I was not going to judge them just because of something I overheard.
The next day, I was released from the hospital. My mother, stepfather, Nina and Jin came to take me home. As expected, Nina was not comfortable about Jin being there. It was visible on her facial expression.
When we reached home, everyone was busy making me feel comfortable, asking me if I needed anything. I said I wanted to stay at my room if that was okay. My mother nodded.
Nina and Jin followed me to my room. It was evident that Nina was not going to let me be alone with Jin today. I did not make any complaints either.
When Jin failed to get any attention from the two of us, he announced, “Leah, do you remember that I am a great cook? Master chef actually. Just wait and see how I’m going to surprise you.” Saying that he went to the kitchen while Nina rolled her eyes.
Jin came back with two bowls of hot ramen. “Oops!” he said, “I forgot that Nina’s with us.” And then he started to giggle like an idiot which made me laugh too.
“Very funny!” Nina said in an annoyed voice. Then she bought a pair of chopstick for herself and shared the ramen with mine.
As I slurped the ramen I remembered something from the past. I had an allergic reaction from ramen in the school cafeteria. Someone had mixed MSG with my ramen.
“Was it you?” I asked Jin.
He was confused but seemed to have understood the graveness of the matter. “What is it, dear?” he asked.
“Did you ever prank me by putting MSG in my ramen?”
He was startled as if he didn’t expected me to remember that. Nina sighed but stayed silent, wanting him to explain it himself.
“I…” he hesitated, “Yeah. But I didn’t know you would have such a violent attack. It was meant to be a joke.”
“Thank you but I’m not eating that.” I pushed the bowl away from me, “Can you guys please leave? I’m tired.”
Nina nodded and walked out of my room. Jin sat there for a while, his expression unreadable. Then, he slowly walked to the door. He turned to me and said, “I’m sorry, Leah. I promise we will make it up to you.”
*************************************************
Day 5: Jimin had cuteness in his bag…
The doorbell rang. I knew it was one of the boys. I stayed in my room and heard my mother open the door. There was a few minutes of greeting. Then came a knock on my door.
“Come in” I said.
Jimin peaked his head first. “Hello!” he called with a smile. He had bought flowers again. This time it was orange tulips. He handed me those.
“Are you a florist?” I asked. In reply, Jimin just laughed.
I was still not over yesterday. I had a feeling that I had shared a somewhat bitter-sweet relationship with the boys. Nina had told me that the boys were trying their best to be better. I asked her what that meant. She just shrugged her shoulders and told me that she would let me figure it out eventually.
“Are you still mad?” Jimin asked pouting his lip. He looked too cute for me to remain mad at him.
“Jimin,” I said, “will you tell me something honestly?” Jimin sat beside me and said, “Ask away.”
“Why are you guys being so nice to me?”
“Because we care for you.” Jimin said. Before I could say anything further, he added, “I know, you might be having some doubts. But trust me, we really do.”
I felt like I could trust him. I pushed my suspicions away and said, “So tell me, what we are going to do?”
Jimin grinned, “Just wait and see what I have in my mind.”
It was true. There weren’t any fun games left that we didn’t play. Starting from painting old stuffs, we played video games, card games and board games, we even played a little hide and seek around the neighborhood. Finally at night, we watched a movie together.
Jimin really had a charm about him. It was hard not being happy around him. Unexpectedly the day went too good. Even my mother noticed that I was happy. And when I went to sleep at night, I was already missing Jimin.
*************************************************
Day 6: Taehyung made a valid point…
I waited for the next Bangtan boy to arrive. I really had fun with Jimin that I was regretting being rude with Namjoon and Jin. I told myself that these boys were probably very fun loving and made jokes without thinking about the consequences. I let Nina’s words assure me that they were trying their best to be better.
The sun had already sat when Taehyung showed up in my house. I was getting a little angry at that time.
“Why bother coming at all?” I asked him first thing once we met.
Taehyung said, “eeeh” to show me his teeth.
“What was that for?”
“I had a sudden toothache” he said, “had to see a dentist. It was really scary.” Then he started massaging his cheeks.
“Aww!” I said, “I’m so sorry, dear. Does it still hurt?” Taehyung pouted his lips and nodded.
“Since its already dark,” I continued, “wanna go sky gazing?”
“Yes! Let’s do that.”
We were lying down on our back in the backyard. There were not much stars to be seen. But staring at the empty sky was somewhat peaceful. I was thinking about how my life had turned out, how little I knew about myself and others. It was really overwhelming.
“I’m scared for the first time since I woke up.” I said to Taehyung.
Taehyung looked at me and asked, “Why are you scared of me?”
“I’m not scared of you, silly!” I chuckled, “I’m just scared about the fact that I’m all empty inside.”
“You’re not.” Taehyung’s voice suddenly sounded very serious, “You’re still the same you. It’s just the memories that’s gone.”
“But aren’t memories what make us who we are?” I asked, turning to face him.
“I don’t know. But hey! We can always make new memories.” Taehyung tried to cheer me up, “Why don’t you take it as a fresh start; a new chapter of your life?”
“A new chapter” I whispered, “at least I’m glad I have you guys.”
*************************************************
Day 7: Yoongi showed his humorous side…
“I can’t believe it’s raining at this time of the season.” Yoongi said. He was a little grumpy today. He had planned to surprise me by taking me to see the local basketball match. But due to bad weather and the fact that the match was to be played in the open, it was cancelled.
“It’s alright, Yoongi!” I put my hand on his shoulder, “take me there some other time. You should be happy that it’s raining or else Nina would have showed up.”
Yoongi gave a fake smile, “Oh yeah! Thank God that Nina is not here today.”
Since we couldn’t find anything interesting to do, we tried to solve an extremely hard puzzle, which exhausted us both. We couldn’t even find any interesting topic to talk about. We were getting bored at a point when Yoongi suggested to make a bucket list each for the next 10 years to come.
I said, “Tae told me last night that it was a new chapter of my life. Making a bucket list sound like a good place to start.”
“So without further ado, let’s get started.” Yoongi bought two pieces of papers and pens for us and we both started to write whatever came to our minds.
“Number one: Go see the Egyptian Pyramid.” I said aloud while writing.
“Number one for me would be going to the city, Barcelona” Yoongi wrote.
So we kept writing. What food we wanted to taste? What classics we wanted to read? How many pets we wanted to own? What our future home would be like? Etc. etc.
“Number 27” I said, “Experience a burning and passionate love.”
Yoongi paused to think his number 27. Then with a smirk, he said, “Help you experience a burning and passionate love.”
We both broke out into laughter. It was rather hilarious hearing a grumpy boy like Yoongi saying something so silly.
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