Kh Saix - Blog Posts

"the answer's no"

Saix... Oh, Saix. He is an absolute asshole!

Lazy Afternoons

(click for better quality!)

Here's a little teaser WIP of my piece for @eternalbondzine!!!

This is after the first layer of pastel chalk. There will be at least one more and then a final detail layer in chalk and pencils (and maybe markers)! I'm a little in love and very excited to finish this piece!! <3

AKUSAIMONTH 2015: BERSERK

Day 20: SET C - “Blank Stare”

Did you know? Apparently Nobodies come back into being the way they remember themselves. I think you probably do, after all the teardrops are gone from your cheeks.

So, apparently the truest vision I have of me is bleeding. I’d laugh about the irony, if it didn’t hurt so much. I keep thinking about how fast the wound scarred over last time. No such luck now, I think it’s getting infected … again. Weird, to be back in a human body, only to realize how frail it really is.

But I don’t think I have to tell you that. Still sleeping, no sign of waking up. Only because you saved me. Again.

I… well.

I know you don’t want to hear this, but … I really wish you didn’t do it. Save me. You should have just left me in the darkness. You made so many friends, and they miss you. And I … just don’t deserve to be here in your place. They’re friendly to me of course, saying any friend of yours is a friend of theirs and saying it doesn’t matter what I …Even Roxas and Xion. I can see her face now, you know.

I … I’m so sorry. And I can’t even get myself to say it. I can’t open my mouth whenever any of them are around.

I’m glad they gave us a place to stay here in the castle. With strangers living where our parents’ houses used to be, I really wouldn’t have any other idea of where to go. But it hurts to be here, in Radiant Garden. I can barely stand to look outside a window. It’s all so full of memories.

Of you. Of us.

I miss you, so much.

It hurts.

I wish I could have at least talked to you, even if just for a little bit. It’s been so long. And even longer since we talked as friends.

I know I’ve said it a hundred times, but I’m so sorry. For everything I did. I don’t know if you can hear me and I don’t know if you’d even want to listen to my side of the story. It’s not an excuse, I know that. I’m not even sure why I told you at all. I … it just hurts so much.

They tried to bully me into joining them for some ice cream again. But I can’t leave you alone. I can’t. This is the only thing I can do for you. Staying by your side, making sure you’re not alone.

Remembering.

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[chapter overview]

Reblogs: Yes, thank you! <3

Reposts on other websites: No!

AKUSAIMONTH 2015: BERSERK Day 19: SET C - “Crush My Heart”

The first thing I felt was a stinging pain carved in my face.

I touched my cheek with a shaking hand and so the second thing I felt was wet and sticky and warm and it suddenly made me taste iron on my lips.

The third thing I felt was breathing. My own, deep but burning in my chest, and that of another, calm, below me. Another. Another person.

I tried to wipe away the blood from my eyes and moved to lift myself up. It was hard, my whole body felt heavy, but I managed to prop myself up on one arm. And there you were.

Breathing, motionless. I stared at your face. Alive, but unmoving. I tried to say your name, but nothing came out, my lips wet with blood but dry anyway and my throat numb. I didn’t know how long I hovered over you, but it was the realization that I was dripping blood onto your face that finally made me sit back.

I didn’t know why I was bleeding again. I didn’t know why I was lying on the floor or why you were there (asleep? unconscious?). But I realized I did know where I was. My breath started to hitch and I felt my stomach clench as I recognized the room where we had lost our hearts. Where you tried to save me, where I gave in anyway, my heart taken from me and my face carved.

Why were we here?

Did this mean… that it was … over?

Was I... back…? Was I …

Was I me again?

Sometimes as a Nobody I had tried to imagine how it would feel when my heart would be returned. I thought I’d feel relief or maybe even happiness. But in reality all I felt was pain and grief and a horror I couldn’t even place but that gripped me so tightly it blocked out everything else. When tears finally came I didn’t stop them. They burned in the cuts on my cheeks, but I barely felt it. I sat next to your unmoving body and I wept for the first time in years, until finally someone came rushing into the room, screaming your name and taking both of us away.

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Reblogs: Yes, thank you! <3 Reposts on other websites: No!

AKUSAIMONTH 2015: BERSERK Day 14: SET C - “To Be Left”

It was no surprise when you left. When you betrayed me.

Everything I once believed in went away with you. All my schemes, all my plans.

The very last part of me that had still, foolishly, believed

was finally dead.

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Midnight Dream.

(I still love Isa’s space hair.)

Part 2/4

(I decided to upload them individually, since it will probably be a few more weeks before I finish the other two drawings in the set.)

Radiant Garden

[I finally got around to edit some photos of my Isa cosplay!] [Photos taken by @miramaare at the Rosengarten in Mannheim, Germany]

Oops, akusaimonth is already over and I only finished one picture out of the four picture set for the first prompt.

I made myself a little reference sheet for Isa’s new clothes! I’m pretty sure they get warped a little by the animation, so some of the details are probably a bit off, but I did my best anyway.

I decided to share it, because maybe it’s a little helpful to others too?

Tumblr crops the pictures by the way, so it’s better to click them.

In Time I Awakened To A New Purpose

(Can you believe KH3 releases in less than a week? I can’t.)

So, last night I dreamt I was playing KH3. 

Lea and Isa (still norted) were there, having a frustrated and angry argument, which wasn’t surprising at all uNTIL IT TURNED INTO A FRUSTRATED AND ANGRY MAKE-OUT SESSION. 

I was so shook, I stopped, turned off the game and texted my girlfriend this one sentence I never expected to type:

“I can’t believe AkuSai is canon now.”

Let me face my fears.

(Isa’s new hair colour looks like space and I love it.)

AKUSAIMONTH | 2018 Day 7: FREE DAY

I want you for a lifetime So if you’re gonna think twice, baby I don’t wanna know, baby I don’t wanna know

[Day 1] [Day 2] [Day 3] [Day 7]

AKUSAIMONTH | 2018 Day 3: You’re too hot when you’re mad.

(I’m spending summer at @kittendough’s place, something like this was bound to happen.)

[Day 1] [Day 2] [Day 3]

AKUSAIMONTH | 2018 Day 2: After Missions

It was painful, but least they had each other.

[Day 1] [Day 2]

Akusaimonth Day 1: Dawn & Dusk

Artist: Skia (σκιά)

“This is the first AkuSai work I have ever done. I attempted to illustrate the course of their friendship by the metaphor of the sun’s course.”

This is my younger brother’s work! He doesn’t have a tumblr, so I’m uploading it for him!

AKUSAIMONTH | 2018 Day 1: Dawn & Dusk

“But you'll never be alone, I'll be with you from dusk till dawn.“

(click it.)

[Day 1] [Day 2]