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Wild.

Satoru: is the strongest sorcerer but can’t hurt Suguru no matter what he’s become

Suguru: knows he’s Satoru’s only weakness but doesn’t use that against Satoru, never raises a hand against him even when he’s dying

Satoru: so guilt ridden for killing Suguru because it’s the last thing he ever wanted to do so he doesn’t dispose of his body the way he should have, causes Kenjaku to overtake Suguru’s body

Kenjaku: inherits Suguru’s memories and understands the depth of the bond between Suguru and Satoru, becoming aware that Suguru is the only weakness Satoru has, launches the Shibuya Prison Realm sealing plan

Satoru: kills thousands of transfigured humans in almost 300 seconds, kills Hanami with minimal effort, uses a Domain Expansion in attempt to exorcize the curses he’s fighting

Kenjaku: uses Suguru’s voice and face to call out to Satoru

Satoru: stops dead in his tracks, the fight leaves his body, happiness fills him for the split second he thinks Suguru is alive in front of him

Kenjaku: successfully traps him and renders him incapable of using his technique

Satoru: realizes that the man in front of him is not really Suguru because Suguru would never have actually hurt him and that’s why his soul knows it isn’t him despite his Six Eyes telling him it’s his cursed energy, calls out to Suguru and tells him to wake up

Suguru: is dead and yet at the sound of Satoru’s voice tries his damnedest to kill Kenjaku with the control he has over his arm

Kenjaku: is amused because no one has ever tried to fight back from beyond the grave before, concludes that the soul is part of the body, and the body is part of the soul

So much language involving souls and their significance. Satoru’s soul recognized the absence of Suguru’s, yet somehow believed he was still there enough to call out to him, and Suguru’s soul answered in spite of all logic.

I really hope things work out differently in the manga so that we can get a fitting culmination to the way things were built up here, Suguru couldn’t have just come back for a split second for nothing. I’m holding out hope.

I think that you have to see them as cause and effect. Yes, the writers forgot about her, so she ends up ignoring her kids. If a character kills someone, then they are still a killer. Because that's how they were written. An author's writing, or, in Thalassa's case, lack of writing, chooses the character's personality. As you said, characters are not autonomous people, therefore they are direct copies of how they are written. Thalassa hid the truth from her kids. It might have been bad writing, but it was still how it worked out in canon. At least that's how I see it! If I'm mistaken, though, please correct me. I only have my personal opinions on this as a basis, and I am always open to new ideas.

Going through the Apollo Justice Trilogy has made me such a Thalassa Gramarye apologist. Especially after seeing how she’s portrayed in fanfics.

It feels like so many people write her off as a negligent parent who’s hiding the truth from her kids on purpose. Guys, she was literally written out of the series by new writers who didn’t want to deal with the backstory AA4 set up. Characters are not autonomous people, they don’t get to choose what to do. Why blame the character instead of the writers who forgot about her in favour of their own ideas for a new game?

on fanfic & emotional continuity

Writing and reading fanfic is a masterclass in characterisation. 

Consider: in order to successfully write two different “versions” of the same character - let alone ten, or fifty, or a hundred - you have to make an informed judgement about their core personality traits, distinguishing between the results of nature and nurture, and decide how best to replicate those conditions in a new narrative context. The character you produce has to be recognisably congruent with the canonical version, yet distinct enough to fit within a different - perhaps wildly so - story. And you physically can’t accomplish this if the character in question is poorly understood, or viewed as a stereotype, or one-dimensional. Yes, you can still produce the fic, but chances are, if your interest in or knowledge of the character(s) is that shallow, you’re not going to bother in the first place. 

Because ficwriters care about nuance, and they especially care about continuity - not just literal continuity, in the sense of corroborating established facts, but the far more important (and yet more frequently neglected) emotional continuity. Too often in film and TV canons in particular, emotional continuity is mistakenly viewed as a synonym for static characterisation, and therefore held anathema: if the character(s) don’t change, then where’s the story? But emotional continuity isn’t anti-change; it’s pro-context. It means showing how the character gets from Point A to Point B as an actual journey, not just dumping them in a new location and yelling Because Reasons! while moving on to the next development. Emotional continuity requires a close reading, not just of the letter of the canon, but its spirit - the beats between the dialogue; the implications never overtly stated, but which must logically occur off-screen. As such, emotional continuity is often the first casualty of canonical forward momentum: when each new TV season demands the creation of a new challenge for the protagonists, regardless of where and how we left them last, then dealing with the consequences of what’s already happened is automatically put on the backburner.

Fanfic does not do this. 

Fanfic embraces the gaps in the narrative, the gracenotes in characterisation that the original story glosses, forgets or simply doesn’t find time for. That’s not all it does, of course, but in the context of learning how to write characters, it’s vital, because it teaches ficwriters - and fic readers - the difference between rich and cardboard characters. A rich character is one whose original incarnation is detailed enough that, in order to put them in fanfic, the writer has to consider which elements of their personality are integral to their existence, which clash irreparably with the new setting, and which can be modified to fit, to say nothing of how this adapted version works with other similarly adapted characters. A cardboard character, by contrast, boasts so few original or distinct attributes that the ficwriter has to invent them almost out of whole cloth. Note, please, that attributes are not necessarily synonymous with details in this context: we might know a character’s favourite song and their number of siblings, but if this information gives us no actual insight into them as a person, then it’s only window-dressing. By the same token, we might know very few concrete facts about a character, but still have an incredibly well-developed sense of their personhood on the basis of their actions. 

The fact that ficwriters en masse - or even the same ficwriter in different AUs - can produce multiple contradictory yet still fundamentally believable incarnations of the same person is a testament to their understanding of characterisation, emotional continuity and narrative. 

I love how Hazbin Hotel consistently portrays Alastor’s biggest strength as not his raw power, but his mind. In Ork terms: Hez not Brutal an’ Cunnin’, but Cunnin’ an’ Brutal.

In stayed gone, Alastor doesn’t cause the power outage. Instead, he makes Vox so frustrated he does it himself.

In Husk’s flashback, it’s shown that Alastor didn’t beat him into submission- but forced him into a contract via a deal and a game.

In Scrambled Eggs, he doesn’t discount Frank (the egg boi) and uses him to covertly spy on them instead of using his possibly identifiable shadow magic.

And later he leverages the knowledge gained from Frank to get a deal with Charlie and possibly snap those strings of his.

Sure, he’s absurdly powerful as an overlord- but we’ve met characters far stronger than him. That’s not what makes him a threat. He’s a threat because he’s a cunning manipulator who’s startlingly good at reading people and using their wants and insecurities to his advantage.

Because of Good Omens brain rot, I’ve been doing a Ninth/Tenth Doctor rewatch. And I was reminded of something I started to notice when I did my first ever rewatch.

The jokey attitude Rose has in the face of danger is a trait she shares with the Doctor, but it’s not something she picks up from him.

In Aliens of London/ World War III, Harriet chides her for making jokingly says something to the effect of how the Slitheen’s compression field works as a kind of weight loss program. This is the first time it’s ever been called out, but it’s not actually the first time she’s done it.

In the first episode, while the Doctor is explaining the living plastic she makes a wry comment about all of the breast implants coming to life. She’s only known the Doctor for a few hours at this point. It goes completely unremarked on, but it’s there.

She does it in the Empty Child when Jack catches her in his transmat beam. Her voice is literally shaking in this one, both from physical exertion and terror.

The thing is, I think it’s a coping mechanism. I think Rose has learned to bury her fear behind snarky remarks and jokes, one she probably picked up to deal with her life on the estates, to deal with being belittled, to deal with her abusive ex.

The first time I really came to this conclusion was while watching Tooth and Claw for the second time.

During the episode, Ten and Rose have this little bet running to see if she can get Queen Victoria to say her “we are not amused” line. Every time Rose does it, she is giggling.

Until she says it after the werewolf (this is a really strange episode even for DW…) attacks.

After taking a second to be relieved at being alive, her face kind of drops, her eyes widen and glaze over a little bit. The line “I bet you’re not amused” is rushed out of her mouth and significantly quieter than she was a minute ago. The delivery is uncharacteristically monotone until the little emphasis she puts on the end.

She does this weird almost-smile like she’s going to laugh even though she is patently not smiling. She does this small little head shake, her arms are tense.

It’s a really unsettling moment, and it was this performance by Billie Piper is what made me start thinking about this.

Queen Victoria yells at her, and Rose immediately apologizes, won’t even make eye contact with anyone. She curls in and turns away a bit.

This moment always bothered me and it took me a few watches to really articulate why.

Rose is scared.

I didn’t see it immediately because Rose displays fear in so many ways.

When she fears someone she cares about is going to leave her, (usually it’s the Doctor), Rose will lash out. This happens in Father’s Day, School Reunion, and Girl in the Fireplace. (The last one is so justified. She’s way more compassionate than I would’ve been at the end of that episode). She also does this Fear Her (when Nina Sosanya’s character continually refuses to watch her possessed daughter)

Other times, she’s able to turn her fear into action. She does this in her very first episode, the series 1 finale, the Cyberman two-parter, the Satan Pit two-parter, and earlier in Tooth and Claw.

Sometimes, she runs. In Christmas Invasion, she is facing a world-ending threat without the Doctor for the first time. She can’t do the heart of the Tardis trick again without ripping a hole in the universe.

Many times she’ll turn to the Doctor or her mother (who does her best but doesn’t always say the right thing)

But sometimes she makes a snarky comment or tells a joke to convince herself and maybe others that it will be okay.

She uses jokes for this specific reason to cheer up the Doctor in the Satan Pit.

Because Rose is compassionate. To Raffalo, to Gwenyth, to the Empty Child, to Jack. To Cassandra and Flora and Elton. She even tries to comfort Reinette, who is condescending towards her and who the Doctor repeatedly abandons her for because she regrets antagonizing Sarah Jane last episode. (I mean Sarah Jane was kind of mean too despite being a grown woman and Rose only being in her early twenties).

It’s the final confirmation the Doctor needs to realize she’s possessed on New Earth.

She will allow the Doctor to sacrifice her without question to save people and shows compassion to a Dalek both before she knows what it is and after it proves to be capable of changing.

She will drop everything for her mother despite whatever disagreements they have, will bend the universe to keep her father from dying alone.

She will literally sacrifice herself and stare into raw time to save the Doctor.

A lot of people think that Rose’s character in s2 is not as interesting. While that’s true, I think it’s more to do with the lack of interactions between her and Ten that aren’t about their romance. Nine and Rose have interactions that challenge each other’s morality. (Dalek, End of the World, Fathers Day, Unquiet Dead). On the rare occasions that Ten and Rose clash, it’s over jealousy brought on by Rose’s fear of being forgotten and Ten’s fear of committing, or feels like it’s in the shadow of his behavior with Reinette. Ironically, it’s their debate in Fear Her (a not great episode) that is one of the more interesting exchange of views that they have.

I wouldn’t completely agree that Rose loses her compassion in the second season. I think some of her more toxic pre-existing traits are just brought to the surface. And her protectiveness does become selfish.

But series 2 dumps a lot on Rose’s shoulders.

Ten’s weird hot and cold demeanor is probably emotionally taxing too. She has a lot of inferiority issues, probably because of how she’s been treated by her mother and others in her life. She frequently reiterates that she doesn’t matter. You can see how much it means to her when Nine earnestly admits she saved his life in response to her nervous teasing and posturing. And you can see how crushed she is when he calls her stupid in a moment of anger in Father’s day. (An event that is partially his fault because he didn’t explain the rules to Rose until afterwards) He immediately apologizes. (He does have that weird flirtation with Lynda but that is dropped just as abruptly as it starts).

The Tenth Doctor has this deeply frustrating set of episodes in series two where he is utterly awful to watch, and it’s after this that the relationship becomes the shallow, unhealthy, codependent one people remember. (I will expand on this in another post)

But it’s not even necessarily because of the Doctor that it’s hard for her. She says in Parting of the Ways that it wasn’t even the adventures she loved, it was him showing her a better way of life.

The adventures, the death, those are what wear her down the same way they wear down Ten.

She is, at one point, told by literal Satan that she is going to die imminently.

No matter how cheerful an episode begins, the loss always brings something melancholic out of Rose, but also someone desperate to hold onto the person she loves and carve out some sort of hope for a future. Impossible Planet does this really well with the little exchange about getting a mortgage. You can tell both of them find the idea appealing, or would if the Tardis was on call for the occasional weekend trip and weekly visit to Jackie. Because Ten likes Jackie, likes having a family.

Because deep down what these two want is each other and to rest. Not stop, they never could do that entirely. That’s why, I think TenToo works well in Empire of the Wolf (I don’t think it’s handled well in the actual show). Because they are still having new adventures with their daughter, just smaller ones.

So while Rose does have her flaws (selfishness, jealousy, a coping mechanism that is not always in the best taste). But she’s 19, she’s human. She’s allowed to and -as a character in a piece of media- should have flaws. I think they are what make a fundamentally brave and compassionate character feel like a real person. They make her more compelling.

(I want to do a later meta on Mickey, because Rose could’ve handled that better, but I also have issues with early Mickey. And it ties into some other stuff…so later meta.)

I was thinking about Midge and Lenny while working on a new chapter of “Very Blue Lives” (it’s on ao3, please go read and review. I need validation like Lenny and Midge need each other).

Anyways, I was thinking about Midge and Lenny in Miami and why Midge turned Lenny down.

Sure the bs Vegas train wreck just happened, and Carol kind of freaked her out, but those answers are boring.

First of all, he’s weirdly reluctant to talk about her career. In Miami, whether she knows it or not, Lenny’s avoidance to discuss her career is part of the reason she walks away. Flash forward to the blue room, he’s making it clear that he listens to her and promises to take her seriously, and that’s when she decides “yes, okay. Let’s see what’s between us.”

She needs him to take her seriously as a comic, and once she realizes that he does, she’s willing to be vulnerable with him as a woman.

And that’s a great step for Midge, who isn’t taken seriously personally or professionally, especially by people she loves.

Look I know we’re not getting shit with the episode count now a days but obsessed with flashbacks to the people the ghosts loved in life. Like let them haunt the narrative PLEASE

Janet whose father spirals, always thinking of how he could have saved her if he forced her to stop. Getting worse and worse, doubling down on his beliefs even as he crumbles. Her brother, forced into the role she dreamed of. Knowing that every step he takes leaves her bloody footprints behind him. How she feels so forgettable but her shadow has been at every one of her family’s shoulder for decades. Her father dying at the hand of incompetence and feeling her fingers dig into his flesh knowing she would have been great. That his faith in a twisted falsity won’t forgive him. The eyes in the fire burn their skin and scorch their pride.

Rhonda who so clearly left love behind. Her best friend seeing her in every blur in her peripheral. How the lyrics turn acidic in her mouth, how she hears a snort and “seriously, cherry pop?” every time but her voice is so, so hoarse. How the gravel in her own burns like hands on her own skin. Rhonda who stuck her classmates to the core. It had to be her fault, had to be, or else it could be them. Or it could be theirs. Rhonda who is swept away but holds an iron grip on their shoulders. Who watches over every failure with the surety that she would have been better. Her parents, crushed under the loss of the only good thing they ever did. Marjorie’s voice lingers and generations feel her fingers over their throat; a lost mystery that drags them forward.

Wally being the fragility of their own lives. Untouchable and above it all, dying in an instant with a broken neck and the promises he was made. The future they were so sure he had, the way he could have made it. But no one knew him. Every story is empty, every memory wrong, he’s forgotten even with a thousand retellings and a blaring stadium named after him. His mother standing in the moment he had. Lost in a split second loop even as decades move past her. How he moves on before they do, haunting because of what they lost in him and no one remembering what he lost for himself. A life lived and mourned for others.

Charley who was swept under the rug. Who no one wants to think of. Who makes them consider their cruelty, they humanity. Who died surrounded by people, knowing they coaxed him into death with kicks and laughs. How an accidental death with no murderer is still a trial of human cruelty. Emilio, aching for years at his own naivety, trying to be better, to make it better for the next Charley. Except Charley is always there (actually this time) and he still can’t hold on. Moving on and feeling every breath stolen from someone else’s lungs. How one boy meant nothing and said so much about people who never saw him. His parents, asked the question of would they rather a dead or gay son but knowing there was never a choice cause they were one and the same and maybe that’s their fault. Emilio holding his husband, seeing baby Charlie on the monitor, knowing a part of him will never not be 17.

Idk if any of this made sense but just give me the people left behind, let them have an impact. I’m losing my mind

Thinking about a Kiri desperate for answers who begs Ewya to see her, to talk to her, to just give her a chance. About her slipping into the water and connecting to the tree of souls when she knows she can’t. About her crying into warm sand as she racks her brain for memories she can’t quite reach and not knowing if they’re even hers.

About a Kiri meeting an aunt she never met, who brushes the hair from her face and whispers about before all this. About a school yard and a her mother as little as Tuk. She dreams of glimpses of red hair and a teacher, not a mother yet. She can’t imagine a life as peaceful as that could really be real.

A Kiri who opens her eyes and is immediately on the floor, a narrow eyed man pulls her up and holds her shoulder tight as if he didn’t shove her to the dirt the moment before. Tsutey is barely there before he is gone but she feels strong as stone. She wants to ask what he was going to say but the ground under her feet is growing growing growing until the earth reclaims her as it did him.

Her grandfather is found when she tries to bond to a tree with a shimmer in its bark. Is not a soul tree but she thinks there’s something there. He whispers about failures. About passing his burden to his youngest daughter’s oldest son. How he almost ended a cycle. How he didn’t.

She never thought about the people in bridgehead that were like Norm, Max, Trudy, Grace - they couldn’t be people in the stories or else the fires were too hot. But she breathes in the air of one of Norms meal kits and the metal floor beneath her feet is littered with candy wrappers and paper. There’s laughter, clinking of vials, a song humming through a tinny radio, and humanity feels a little too real. Her skin suddenly feels thin, her bones weaker. Her body is too big and too awkward but there’s a haze she hopes they felt all the way til the end. She never forgets how warm the sun through a window felt on such fragile skin.

Spider is so small and so stubborn and she can’t protect him. She’s screaming into the soil, begging for her mother to tell her what to do, and then the smoke fills her lungs. She gasps, breathing in fumes and choking on the poison when his eyes meet hers. Paz Socorro has his eyes, his curls in darker little ringlets. She cries, sobbing just like Kiri. She tried to get home, she tried not to leave him. She didn’t mean to start the pattern. She was only 23, she’d never done this before. Her plane burns and all she can taste are ashes but she feels her strength in her bones, trembling as they are, and she marches home like she doesn’t remember what fire tastes like.

The answers never come plain and sometimes Kiri doesn’t think she’s one person. She thinks she’s a collection. All the souls lost on pandora, gathered and loved with her ancestors or buried beneath the dirt she walks over. She tries though, again and again and again because the heartbeat thunders so loud that she swears it’s thousands of them, begging her to find them. She loves them as much as she hates them. She clings to her mother, the large and the small, and speaks with the only voice that doesn’t shake. Thinking about Kiri who calls it a blessing because a curse is ungrateful and she can’t call them something so cruel. She was never a little girl in the same way there’s always one reaching for her hand in the quiet seconds between minutes. Thinking about how Kiri can never just be Kiri but the way it’s integral to her that she can’t ever just be the one girl she was born as. How she’s not even sure which one that is.

I saw a post discussing Spiders hair earlier and I can’t get it out of my mind. For anyone who doesn’t know, I study theater design and I can’t get over how good of a design choice it would have been to have Spiders head shaved by the RDA.

Spiders dreads are a combatted topic 24/7, but think of it from a narrative stand point. He has dreads to resemble Jake, his hero and desired father figure, but his dreads are choppy and awkward. Jake’s are maintained and well cared for with a regular length and size in comparison to Spiders which are a multitude of lengths, more matted than styled, and just overall poorly done. However, Spider clings to them thinking it makes him more like the na’vi and pass him better as one of the people. He thinks it claims him to a family.

His hair is something of his identity but also a self-proclaimed attachment to Jake that more accurately shows how separate he is from them - his hair is uncared for and shows he’s a child without anyone to help him with it. It moreso shows him as the “stray” he’s fighting not to be.

With that emotional connection in mind, consider the RDA shaving his head. They’re all forced submission and conformity, thinking he looks too savage and too wild by having dreaded hair or stripes on his skin. They shave it and leave it choppy and uneven. It’s embarrassing and a humiliation tactic where he’s left feeling stripped of part of his identity and forced closer to humanity while also having it poorly done as a reminder that no one cared for him enough to do it well.

Consider Quaritch stepping in, all bravado and false fatherly love, sitting him down on their first night out and gently shaving his hair down. Imagine him shaving it into the same crop he wore in his life until it’s even and clean. It’s the first time his hair has been done and cared for properly since his early childhood when Norm still did it for him.

Except this time it’s Quaritch claiming him - bringing out the family resemblance through his hair, marking him as his own in the way Spider always begged someone would, but also marking him distinctly as human. As loved only by those he hates. Imagine the emotional manipulation of his hair being done for the first time by Quaritch after he watched Neytiri and Jake care for their own children’s his whole life.

Imagine him in the reef, blood on his hands and knowing Quaritch is alive, with no braids in his hair, no dreads, and nothing to tie him back to who he was. Kiri trying to thread her fingers into nothing, Spider shivering with nothing on his neck, and then laying there with his hair beginning to grow and again no one to braid it.

The angst it could be. Hair care can be such an intimate thing, especially in native cultures. They missed such a great opportunity to explore a visual cue of everything Spider went through without having to make it gory or too intense. But not only that, it could have shown his arc after with his hair showing where he ends - preferably braided and neat, shells and beads woven in, and him visually showing the change of course his life takes

reginald lied to klaus about his death in 3x07. in 3x06, when klaus comes to visit him, it’s a day; it’s still a day when reginald electrocutes him to death:

it’s night, when allison comes to the academy with harlan’s body in the trunk (and there’s also klaus’ body somewhere in the academy):

and it seems only the NEXT DAY reginald takes klaus out for training. in 3x07, reginald tells klaus he remained dead for 22 minutes. so, klaus probably thinks it’s still the day when he told reginald about the white buffalo suite; the last thing he remembers is being electrocuted. reginald also adds that klaus was totally vulnerable, and he could’ve taken any of his organs. klaus is shocked, because why good ol’ reggie would do that, right?

the training starts at 1:15 p.m., reginald writes it down. logically, klaus’ 22-minute-long death should be listed as 001, but:

it’s 004. 22 minutes - lower body (something something), and LACERATION? before that, 003 - failure (?). 

between klaus’ FIRST electrocution and the bus-ball training, reginald had killed him not one, but four (FOUR!) times. and, most likely he did indeed try to cut him/cut out his organs (?) to check on how/if his dead body can heal itself. spoiler alert: klaus CAN HEAL HIMSELF even when he’s dead. later, we can see it in 3x09 when he comes back to life when the wound on his stomach has ALREADY healed. (so no one could steal his falling out guts, right? reginald knew. old bitch fucking knew). 

so, i think reginald kept electrocuting klaus all night between 3x06-3x07 (with the method reginald chose, it could probably mess up klaus’ memories? he literally doesn’t remember shit except for being electrocuted one last time?) until he made sure that: a) klaus comes back fairly quick now (attempt 003 says 26 minutes, not bad, not bad!) and b) his body heals from any injuries so haha getting crashed with a car is not a big deal.   

klaus has this habit of searching for answers and purpose in the same place he lost them. his autonomy was stolen from him as a child, and he lives with that loss every day. it’s quite common for people with that experience to live with dissociative symptoms, and i actually think klaus is a realistic portrayal of that. while it’s never outright said that it’s dissociation he deals with, i think a lot of survivors could probably see it in him. he’s always seemed to feel a disconnect with himself, with his own body (for example – and this is a small one – when he told ben “you’re not getting in this body,” rather than my body). his identity is something transient, something that shifts drastically sometimes depending on the situation he’s in, which is a common experience in people with dissociative symptoms – we’re like “chameleons.” 

he forgets key things regarding his trauma: that, or his brain will twist the events to make them more palatable to himself. he didn’t remember being killed as a child, even though it happened multiple times. and despite not remembering anything, he still has visceral reactions when it comes to being confined. he may not consciously remember every event, but his body does, and so he reacts accordingly, as if the threat of being killed again were a present one. because the body remembers the loss of control, it remembers the autonomy that was once stolen. then there’s “bus ball.” obviously, it was an objectively shitty, terrifying thing, being once again murdered, multiple times by your own father and abuser – and as an experiment, no less. despite that, the events were portrayed as something that was for the most part fun, almost. and when he vaguely recounted said events later on, he referred to it as “bus ball.” like it really was nothing more than a game. that’s another common dissociative symptom, and a common trauma symptom: being so disconnected on a certain level from your own trauma that you’re able to talk about it like it’s nothing. that you’re able to remember a skewed version of it so that you don’t have to internalize any of the real terror.

touch is another one. klaus is a very tactile person. he communicates well through touch. but he often doesn’t like being touched, unless it’s from someone he knows, loves and trusts.

he startles easily, too. will jump back at sudden movements or words, gets frightened by loud noises and will cover his ears.

his need for connection is relevant here, too. he has a hard time being alone with himself, and so he finds people to cling to, or finds people that will cling to him, just to stave off those feelings and to ground himself, almost. sometimes it spirals out of control, like with the cult. but his constant need for connection stems from feeling disconnected.

one of his passing comments to luther in s1 (”I remember my first time… oh no. i don’t”) hits hard, too. it’s not uncommon for trauma victims to experience hypersexuality as a result of this loss of autonomy. and then, to not even remember some of these encounters (obviously, the drugs/alcohol likely play a role in this not remembering. but hey, what’s addiction often a symptom of? oh yeah. trauma.)

this disconnect he feels from his own body is also why he was able to have certain encounters even with people he didn’t like. keechie comes to mind. he didn’t like keechie, that was made clear. but it sounds like he still had no problem having sex with him, despite this. it’s common, when you have dissociative symptoms, to feel this sort of disconnect. you don’t always care what happens to a body that doesn’t feel like yours, hell, you can enjoy it, sometimes – even if you don’t like the person you’re doing it with.

it’s why he gets off on torture, too. klaus being a masochist was clearly portrayed in episode four, but then was referenced again two other times. (”if i see a boner, i’m out” when he was being tied up, and, “i’m going to beat you, and not the way you like it.”) when you grow up tortured and become accustomed to it it’s easy for the brain to say “hey, this is unbearable so actually we like this thing now. that’ll make it bearable!” i mean, obviously it’s a little more complicated than that, but that’s the gist of the situation. 

you often find comfort – or even pleasure – in familiarity, even when familiarity isn’t safe. we see that in klaus.

and that leads me back to my main point: klaus searches for answers, he searches for purpose in the same places he lost them. if he can give up his body to anyone who will take it, then maybe he can take back autonomy, is what he might think. if he can have a say in his own destruction, whether it’s addiction or reckless behavior, then maybe he can take back control. 

but that’s never truly how it plays out. a trauma survivor will never find what they’re looking for this way. i believe that klaus is starting to realize this, even if he does run into setbacks, and even though he will continue to run into setbacks. if he wants to find control, and if he wants to find purpose, he will have to reroute that energy into a path of recovery rather than destruction. it’s a hard hill to climb, but we know he can do it.

i could say more about this, but i think this says enough, for now.

Why Chrom Fire Emblem is The Husband of All Time: An Essay

SO. There was a screenshot going around of a reddit thread asking about how Chrom has managed to maintain such lasting popularity as a Fire Emblem husband even 6 years after Awakening came out. Given how beloved he still is another 5+ years later, I could not resist taking the opportunity to talk about just what I think makes him so great and endears him to players.

Character Introduction:

Let’s start out the same way Awakening does—with Chrom’s in-game introduction. This is one of the immediate ways Chrom sets himself apart. The game boots up and before anything else happens, Chrom is there expressing his unshakable faith in the player character. You take down the Bad Guy™ together, he turns and gives you this wide, puppy-ish smile and then you push him out of the way to take the hit from an oncoming spell in his stead. Right away you know this is someone your player character cares about deeply—and clearly that care is returned, because he’s immediately running over to make sure Robin’s alright.

Of course, as we all know, things go south very quickly after that. But as the cinematic plays out, and you proceed to watch yourself stab him in the chest, the *first* thing he does, the very first words out of his mouth are: “this is not your fault”. Chrom has just been completely blind-sided and arguably betrayed by his best friend, possibly his spouse, and his immediate instinct is to absolve Robin of guilt. He is literally more concerned about Robin blaming themselves for what happened than about his own imminent death. That alone tells you so, SO much about the depth of their relationship. It tells you both how deeply Chrom cares and how well Chrom knows Robin too. And not only that, but his final request, the ONE and only thing he asks of Robin before dying is that they will promise him they will escape from this place. In his last moments, his single “selfish” wish is for Robin to assure him that they will do what they can to survive. Chrom’s final request is for Robin to give him the comfort and peace of mind he can only obtain through the assurance that even though he won’t get out of there himself, Robin will. He just wants to be able to die believing they’ll take care of themselves and be alright—and knows them well enough to realize that unless he makes them promise, they likely won’t.

AND THEN. And then!!!! You jump cut to Robin waking up in the field with all the sunshine and Chrom’s smiling down with the softest expression and his ridiculously blue eyes. He lifts Robin up by the hand and pulls them right up to his face (because he has no concept of personal space, apparently) and OUUuuggh.

Those scenes in direct sequence make me so insane. You get Chrom’s life ending with Robin immediately followed by Robin’s life starting anew with Chrom. Chrom’s unwavering faith in them and his eagerness to extend his hand and bridge the gap between them from the moment they meet until his last breath. The warmth and kindness and love that Chrom treats Robin with is communicated so effectively in the first few MINUTES of the game it honestly makes me feel unwell. Showing how profoundly Chrom cares for Robin immediately endears him to the player. And he only gives you more reasons to love him as the game goes on.

Personality:

There can be a tendency in some corners of fandom to simplify Chrom to just being either a generic prince charming type character or a lovable himbo. I’m not here to police how other people enjoy him, but I will say that those characterizations fail to get at some of the aspects of his personality I find most compelling.

Chrom is deceptively nuanced. While there are certainly ways in which he aligns very closely with the standard jrpg protagonist, I suspect that a lot of his enduring popularity is the result of the ways he deviates from it too. He is brave and loyal and cares deeply for his friends, yes. He has profound conviction in his ideals and strives to do the right thing, as is typical for that archetype…but what makes Chrom so lovable is his determination to keep trying to be good in spite of the ways it does not come easily to him.

We see this in the Valm arc, when he’s struggling to reconcile his own beliefs about justice with his sister’s ideals for peace. We hear echoes of it when he talks about the horrors the Ylissean people endured at his father’s hand and how despite that, he has never been able to understand how Emmeryn forgave them for the cruelty they once directed her way. He has so much admiration for his older sister’s ideals despite the fact that peace is not his first instinct. 

When Emmeryn first sacrifices herself, Chrom is consumed with grief and rage, and it takes some time for him to understand why she made the decision she did. “Peace above all else” is just not how he’s programmed to operate…yet he wants it to be. If you count the drama CDs as canon, then that serves as another excellent example as well—where the message of his sister’s sacrifice is so lost on him that his first instinct is to respond to it with violence and prejudice and hatred directed at the very people she sought to reach out to. For a moment there, we see him veer from the person he wants to be towards what we as the player can only assume is the person his father left him afraid that he would become.

And yet he finds his way back. He stumbles, he lashes out, but his love for his friends and fear of losing more of those he holds dear is able to help him course correct.

I love that tug-of-war in him. I love that we get glimpses of the darker paths he could have gone down and that there are tangible consequences for his mistakes. Early in the game, we see Chrom lose control of his temper and how Gangrel and Aversa are able to take advantage of that to officially declare war on Ylisse. Chrom later tells Gangrel that were he alone, he can imagine losing himself in that need for vengeance but reiterates that it’s love that is able to keep him from succumbing to that.

And it’s not only that he’s able to stop himself from being horrible—his losses are the catalyst for him coming into his own as a leader. He’s able to pick himself up and hold himself together to see their troops through the rest of the war. And he manages that despite the fact that in the course of mere days, he lost both his home and his most important person and has been freshly saddled with the duty of ruling an entire country. That’s…a lot. And really goes a long way in demonstrating Chrom’s incredible strength of character and conviction. We get some wonderful moments of vulnerability where he confesses to being riddled with doubts about his own capabilities and worthiness, but in spite of that, he is still determined to try to be the person that Ylisse needs him to be.

All of this leads me right into another wonderful aspect of Chrom’s personality, which is that he is just…so driven by emotion. He feels DEEPLY, and while the narrative definitely uses that as a way to hurt him and force him to grow at times, something that really stands out to me about Chrom is how the story isn’t here to send a message that it’s wrong for him to be that way. Chrom’s big feelings are one of his greatest strengths in addition to his greatest weakness—they’re what saves his life and ultimately Robin’s too, if you go the sacrifice ending route.

And ya know what? I honestly think that’s such a breath of fresh air. I love how much he does NOT embody the emotional disconnectedness that you see pushed a lot of times with stereotypical masculinity. I love that he is the hero, and he's gallant, and very traditionally "manly" in a lot of senses…AND that he's also very emotional and guided by his heart. If you’re playing with f!Robin then you wind up with a really refreshing inversion of gender stereotypes from that: in which Chrom is the emotional decision maker and Robin is the more calculating and logic driven of the two.

Beyond his big heart, I can’t talk about what’s so charming about Chrom’s personality without touching on the ways he embodies a certain level of gap moe as well. Chrom is so stern and serious, as well as quite charismatic when he’s speaking from a place of passion. But on the flip side of that, we get to see him as an absolute bumbling mess when he’s out of his element. He’s easily embarrassed / flustered, self-conscious about his appearance, and often socially awkward where romance is involved. While these traits may seem of minor importance compared to the whole rant above, I think they’re really important for humanizing and rounding him out.

There are lots of other nuances to his characterization that go a long way in fleshing him out too. Despite being a prince, Chrom is blunt and completely unmindful of formalities. That, along with his impulsivity, definitely gets him into trouble sometimes. He’s melodramatic and blisteringly sincere. He’s a little bit clumsy and doesn’t know his own strength. He has a dry sense of humor and can be surprisingly funny. He’s optimistic and trusting—not due to naivete or stupidity but because he has decided that giving people chances and believing the best of them is an important value to him and one that is worth embodying in how he lives his life. 

Lucina’s presence in the story and his immediate and complete acceptance of her is an extremely effective way of demonstrating what an incredible father he is too. Honestly, he just has really wonderful relationships and deep admiration for a lot of the women in his life and that absolutely earns him points in my book (and I suspect in many others’ as well). When you look at all of that together, I don’t think it’s hard to understand why he’s so beloved.

Design:

Slightly less serious note here, but I think it warrants discussion regardless because character design absolutely contributes to player’s feelings about and interpretation of a game’s cast members.

And Chrom is…well, he’s eye candy, honestly. He’s got the nice, exposed arm, the messy blue hair, the completely nonsensical outfit he somehow manages to look handsome in anyway (his questionable sense of fashion is a charm point, okay?). Add in the square jaw and the surprisingly long eyelashes and he’s just. He’s very pretty. Idk what to tell you. Bonus points for the summer scramble cg where he has the most inexplicably flat butt of all time. And I really do believe that some of the oddities of Chrom’s design lend memorability to him and go a long way in setting him apart from other lords in the series with similar design concepts. The insistent asymmetry across many of his outfits, the fact he’s showing a little skin, idk it just WORKS. Chrom is hot, I don’t make the rules.

Relationship with Robin / the Player Character:

Last but not least, I want to talk about Chrom’s relationship with Robin.

I touched on some of this in his character introduction already, but Chrom is just…the biggest Robin stan. If Robin has only one fan then that is Chrom. If Robin has no fans it’s because Chrom is bleeding out on the floor with lightning in his gut. 

He just has such deep respect and admiration for them. He values Robin’s opinion and insight and thinks so highly of them and their ideas, often serving as an enabler in many cases (setting the boats on fire, the volcano, etc.). Chrom’s faith in Robin is SO unshakable that when his daughter tells him that Robin is going to be magically controlled and forced to murder him, his response is, “That won’t happen because Robin and I love each other so much that everything will somehow be okay. No, I will not elaborate.” And ya know what? He was RIGHT. Their bond DOES wind up being so strong that it’s able to change fate. The narrative is quite literally validating his slightly ridiculous insistence that him and Robin just care about each other The Most of Anyone Ever. He is Robin’s biggest advocate from the moment they meet when he defends them from Frederick’s suspicions all the way to the game’s close when he either assures Robin that their life was worth preserving or, as in the case of the sacrifice ending, that he will spend the rest of his own life searching for them until they return.

Honestly the fact that Chrom was willing to potentially risk dooming the whole world to the fell dragon’s awakening 1,000 years down the line just so he doesn’t have to lose his comfort tactician is WILD. For the game’s hero to literally say “we don’t have to defeat this evil for good, the people of the future can figure it out” JUST so he can keep Robin is absolutely unhinged behavior and I love it. I think it’s incredibly humanizing that he’s a little bit selfish about the people who are most important to him…that despite his willingness to sacrifice himself or run headfirst into danger, he draws the line at losing Robin because he’s already lost his most important person once and he’s not going to let it happen again. Chrom and Robin absolutely come across as a little codependent and a lot obsessed with each other and personally I wouldn’t have it any other way.

And then there’s his love confession to Robin. GOd...

I think that’s the most flustered Chrom appears in any content in the entire game…and it’s because he treasures their friendship so deeply that he is petrified about messing it up or saying the wrong thing. I love that he goes into their S support dead set on NOT telling Robin what is going on but the second he realizes that Robin is under the impression he doesn’t care about them or like spending time with them anymore he is so horrified and desperate to correct that line of thinking that he blurts out the full love confession on the spot.

He’s SO earnest throughout the whole thing, but then at the end he hits you with the whole “this is the best day of my life”, and the “You are the wind at my back and the sword at my side. Together, my love, we shall build a peaceful world, just you and me” (thank you Matt Mercer for your services), and the cg image of him staring right at Robin with what are basically heart eyes and. I just. There were no survivors.

That’s not even their only proposal / love confession scene either! The fact that the game gives us an entirely separate alternate proposal that’s more serious in tone is the icing on the cake. How many ships out there can say that they get not one but TWO canon proposals that are both that good? Truly no one is doing it like chrobin.

Closing Remarks:

Chrom is a well written and nuanced character who struggles and grows over the course of the story while always remaining true to himself and his ideals. His intense and unending trust, admiration, and love of Robin endears him to the player from the moment the game begins all the way to its conclusion. He is kind and good while still being fundamentally flawed (and it doesn’t hurt that he’s very handsome to boot). Bearing all that in mind, while the message of Awakening may be that nothing is inevitable, Chrom’s conceit and execution were always going to lead to MANY of those who play the game coming to love him and pick him as Robin’s husband…and there may be no greater evidence of that then the fact I’m out here writing all of this eleven years after the game’s release.

no one asked, but here is my big speech about shinra/izaya friendship

i wanna start with their school selves

i saw a lot of people saying that izaya was normal at school and shinra just made him "bad", but in my view it's not the thing. like, in shool izaya already wasn't "normal", he just tried his best to pretend to be an ordinary student. he didn't make any close relationship, isolating himself from strong connections with people (just like he's doing it now), but still had to be in the society because of his interest in humas

vol 9, ch 4

and this interest was already unhealthy, for example, he liked seeing people hurting each other

vol 9, ch 4

shinra wasn't really different from his current self. he was obsessed with celty and she was the reason he made friends with izaya and he didn't really care about others or anything that surrounds him in general. he stayed in his comfort zone (love to celty) and was alright

as i said, shinra invited izaya to his biology club because celty told him to socialize

then, izaya became interested. because shinra's lifestyle was different and opposite of izaya's, especially because their different opinion on humans: izaya loved them, shinra didn't care but he loved celty who is not human, so izaya was genuinely interested in his personality

vol 9, ch 4

then shinra was the only person who was a mystery to izaya, he couldn't predict shinra's actions and reactions and he was annoyed and facsinated about that at the same time

epitome of eighteen stories, ep 15 (translation by xcaneolupusx)

speaking about shinra, he could understand izaya's nature perfectly

vol 13, ch 11

so, izaya became interested in shinra and finally accepted his invitation to the biology club. everything starts here

izaya started feeling real attachment to shinra. now he was not just an interesting person, he was a friend. izaya felt free with him because they both were weird and shinra accepted izaya with all his strange hobbies and interests. their communication was full of mutual acceptance and they both were happy with it. but izaya's genuine attachment is really strong, as long as shinra preferred keeping distance with everyone except celty. not because he didn't like something about izaya nor he didn't care, it was just comfortable for him like that

the key thing: shinra being stabbed by nakura. i can talk about different aspects of this moment

for shinra it's just another proof of his crazy love for celty — he protected izaya mostly because he thought celty would praise him for such a heroic actions

vol 9, epilogue

for izaya it was a complex thing. at first, he was shocked by being protected for the first time. at second, he felt jealous and that's what i find a really important thing. he felt jealous because shinra wasn't alone even if he's so uninterested in others. he had someone who he loved, he had someone to love him, he had important connections, basically he had things izaya didn't

vol 9, epilogue

but despite everything, he still was a friend to izaya, so izaya wanted revenge. so, to my mind, this whole situation not made him who he is now, just gave him the reason to stop trying to conform and show his true self

eventually he promised to make nakura pay for this. shinra just agreed and gave izaya free reign. and izaya really kept his promise. 12 years passed and nakura is still suffering

izaya calls that nakura moment the turning point of his life and the thing that influenced his current self the most

vol 9, epilogue

i see this part as the starting point for everything happening in the plot, because this was the moment when izaya finally decided what to do

when shinra and izaya finish school, they see each other more rarely. because it's not necessary to meet every day and they both have things to do. shinra happily lives with celty, again, staying in his comfort zone and izaya, who doesn't have any life and friends, is alone with his love for humans and crazy ideas. and still he thinks about shinra as a friend

vol 9, ch 2

and shinra calls him a friend too

but shinra has priorities and celty is the most important of them, so when izaya calls him from the hospital, he just hangs up

shinra lives in his love and keeps distance with everyone else as always and izaya suffers with his attachment alone, because he can't and doesn't want to get rid of it. but he understands that he's the only one to blame in his state (because he chose such a life for himself) so he isn't angry at shinra. maybe just a bit

there is another important moment, when izaya thinks about shinra being mad at him, feels something like guilt and beats the telephone pole

vol 9, epilogue

friendship with shinra is the closest relationship izaya has, but again, i can't blame shinra for his uncaring attitude. he treasures izaya and still accepts him and izaya's problems are not something shinra can solve

their relationship can't be seen through the prism of normal friendship because they both are extraordinary people with their own standards

hope and sacrifice.

I need to expand on this more on here because I'm going insane thinking about this.

the main themes in the rise movie center around hope and sacrifice. hope, being a ninjas greatest weapon and what leo ultimately uses to get the team motivated, and sacrifice which leo actively uses. these two concepts are interchangeable and are used to develop this unhealthy view of being a hero.

leo being the prime example of this.

leo is notorious for being a martyr in the movie not because he wants to be self sacrificial and thinks he deserves it (although a small part of him might think that) but because thats what he's been taught and grown up to think. of taking responsibility. of allowing to take hold of the "burden" of caring for his team, for his brothers. he must sacrifice a part of himself in order to be a worthy leader. no more immature pizza stacking competitions, no, leo must sacrifice that part in order to mold into being a leader. he must sacrifice his childhood.

its no surprise leo wants nothing to do with this idea, its no surprise he's constantly rebelling against this notion and not taking it seriously because as much as we have seen leo act dumb and immature, we know that he is smarter than he acts. he knows that being a leader is sacrificing the part of freedom he loves so much. the part that can joke around with his brothers and can allow himself to easily fight off bad guys without worrying because thats not his job. he's just leo.

thats raphs job.

raph has sacrificed this part of himself. his identity is surrounded by being the oldest, being the responsible one, having the "raph chasm", being the leader. raph was born as the eldest son to take the responsibility and with little to no help from splinter (because lets be honest raphs relationship with his brothers is also very parental), raph has had to create this idea of what being a leader is not only to himself but for his brothers. he has created the mold of being a leader from shows, from experiences, from being the oldest. he must sacrifice a part of himself, a part of his freedom, a part of his childhood, in order for his brothers to be safe.

and now his younger brother is being pushed into this with little to no warning.

(now I could go on and on about how the season 2 finale was the catalyst for raph and leos bond and brotherhood to slowly unravel BUT thats another thread.)

the rejection of the leader position from leos perspective makes so much sense. leo is still a kid. this responsibility isn't for him, he's not equipped to make these decisions. thats for raph. thats for the oldest.

which makes why raph is so upset with leo in the beginning of the movie so much more real. all he's known is this great weight of carrying the burden and guilt of his brothers and the actions that could cause them to get hurt, he has taken the fall, taken the blame, and has done so without faltering (kind of). although leo is the "faceman", all of the brothers show some sort of mask to hide behind in an unhealthy way. donnie hides behind his science and his title of being the "smart one", mikey hides behind the fact that he is the youngest and his many dr. personas. leo and raph both hide behind some form of bravado that masks the fear they have for their brothers and their safety. raph uses his anger while leo uses his laid back attitude. both are hiding their fear. their both scared.

this is where hope and sacrifice begin to blur.

casey jr. introduces us to the idea of hope because he essentially is the human personified version of hope. he is future leos last hope. he is what is left of an entire civilization that has now been destroyed. but what is hope without sacrifice. casey jr. has witnessed both future mikey and future leo sacrifice themselves for the greater good. for hope. since this is all casey jr. has ever known, especially with how he grew up (another major theme but ill talk about that another time) the idea of sacrifice is hand in hand with hope. with winning. with being a hero.

so when leo comes back after raph sacrifices himself so leo can escape, casey jr. is more thrilled than anything that they have the key. because they "won", because raph sacrificed himself, because hope is nothing without sacrifice.

and this is again another reason why leo begins to put the two together and create his own warped idea of being a leader.

being a hero.

learning about his future self, of how much casey jr. idolizes him and calls him "the greatest ninja the worlds ever seen", of how he was a leader and led the entire revolution. of how he saved the world by sacrificing himself. its only until raph does the same does the gears begin to turn.

being a leader is about sacrifice.

and so getting thrown into the prison dimension is the responsible thing to do. its the right thing. its the sacrifice that someone like leo believes is what a leader would do because yeah leos the leader now and leaders do whatever they can to make sure their team is safe.

that their brothers are safe.

the words "its not about me" play into this mindset and although by the end it helps leo learn that he needs to put more trust in his brothers and allow the burden of being a leader to fall on more than his shoulders, "its not about you" is exactly the mindset that raph had in the beginning of the movie. and because of this, raph and leo both are stuck in this cycle of responsibility and freedom. of having to navigate between wanting to sacrifice their future of being heroes in order to just live like normal people for a few minutes or sacrifice their own individuality to bare the weight of the world on their shoulders. and with their situation of being literal mutated turtles created only to become super soldiers, they automatically are deemed special and were brought into this world in hopes of fighting against humanity.

A ninjas greatest weapon is hope after all.

Although already quite amazing, Kaiser Impact Magnus is still imperfect. Kaiser can also only do it with a static ball and not a moving one. And even with the static one, Loki was able to easily shut it down.

Kaiser has a lot to go.

And I’m racking my head trying to figure out how he can get stronger when his aim (love) and means (malice/restriction) do not align. Love is supposed to be freeing, and malice can never yield love.

He knows this.

He knows that love = freedom.

He knows this, and yet

...he rejects it.

By yearning for love while forging ahead with malice, he dooms himself to never actually reach love. And he does this on purpose, all for the sake of creating a restrictive environment where he, allegedly, is stronger.

Does it have to be like this?

Is there really no other way for him to grow while allowing love into his life?

...And is Kaiser actually stronger without love? Is restriction truly the answer?

Much to think about.

But seriously, why do we get grown people who believe in the WILDEST conspiracy theories about world control (From Antivaxxers, to Flat Earthers, to microships to evil electromagnetic waves the damn Atlantis and Reptiloids), but the ONE TIME we actually get some dystopian type shit for mass propaganda and controll... they just dont do anything. Like i swear (again), you`d think this would be such a FERTILE ground for the conspiracy fanatics to throw a fit and mass hysteria and DO SOMETHING GOOD FOR ONCE. But nope... they are in fact the ones believing those ai videos and pictures like they are real and reposting them as proof of giants and aliens. If someone started spreading some bullshit like: "The devil is infultrating childrens minds through ai and its evil secret hidden messages boOooOo to put evil spirits in their pineal gland and close their third eye" i would pray for their health honestly... ...Not because i`d think they are insane or anything (they probably are though), but because i`d hope they keep doing whatever they are doing lol...

I find it a bit funny that i was drawn to cara bacause of the online glaze feature...only to realize that it has a cooldown and literally isn`t available while i`m awake during the day.

I said screw it and decided to post stuff anyway without glazing it. Ai is not worth my sleep scedule lol

No shade to the creator of Cara though. The fact they teamed up with glaze and made the feature available in the first place is so cool (even if i can`t use it). Hope to get webglaze at some point but from what i understand it is invite based.

The choice of wording used here is something that I find very fascinating. I mean, it would’ve been enough if Monoma simply taunted Izuku by saying that Katsuki isn’t as great as he thinks / a bad hero, by calling their relationship delusional, or by criticizing Katsuki’s abrasive behaviour. Izuku could’ve gotten angry enough to create an opening for OFA to explode from just that alone and we all would’ve bought it.

But that isn’t what happened here. Horikoshi specifically had Monoma mock the fact that Katsuki continues to smile / laugh (depending on the translation) despite causing the end of All Might. That’s the truly messed up thing about all of this. This isn’t just normal playground teasing or jealousy. He’s implying that someone like Katsuki doesn’t deserve to be happy. It isn’t the damaging of Katsuki’s pride, his honour, their rivalry bond, or their shared dream that is presented as being Izuku’s weak spot, but the idea of someone threatening Katsuki’s happiness as a person. Someone mocking the emotional turmoil and resulting strength that Katsuki gained after moving forward.

I think that says a lot about how Izuku thinks of Katsuki. He isn’t just some beacon of victory for Izuku to admire and idealize in his head or a fellow hero to put a lot of expectation on for the sake of chasing after. For Monoma to decide to poke this nerve in particular and for Horikoshi to decide to have this be what triggers him into losing control, the message really seems to be that Izuku just wants Kacchan to be happy no matter what he’s doing in life. Counting by the severity of the situation, he feels this way the strongest out of all other feelings he may have concerning Katsuki.

And that’s just the sweetest thing.

Now a part of me does feel pity and grief for the Nowhere King/Elk/General, but on the other hand I see the Mysterious Woman kill him and I’m like;

This lady didn’t ask for this. She was only ever kind to the Elktaur and his components, but then had to deal with the fallout of them fighting over her without much, if any, regards to what the Woman wanted. A part of me is sad for the Elk, but a part of me notes that it’s kind of possessive how he mostly throws a pity party for himself and doesn’t seem to care that his beloved is happy. And the General... Well? He speaks for himself.

The Mysterious Woman saw two worlds get ravaged, countless people died, because these two men couldn’t agree over her. And she no doubt blamed herself, shouldered the burden for their immaturity, hence why her final song evokes the ‘poison’ they’d fed her. She had little to no agency in this mess, yet was the centerpiece of it as a trophy the Nowhere King and General were fighting over; Civilizations were ravaged by the Nowhere King, while the General let people die so he could be with the Woman when she clearly didn’t want to prioritize their relationship over lives.

So to see the Mysterious Woman acknowledge her pain so she can absolve herself of that unfair guilt placed upon her... Realize it’s not her fault, the Elktaur and his halves made their decision? Genuinely cathartic. The Mysterious Woman can finally be free of the burden of their possessive love that killed and destroyed, and not treat this tragedy as her responsibility, but simply a problem to be dealt with. She would’ve loved him regardless, it really is just HIS fault.

From a meta standpoint, I have to wonder if this is Megan Nicole Dong’s discussion of how women are treated in media. How in stories like these, the women’s feelings and agency in these back and forth conflict between their potential lovers is often overlooked, swept aside, because the pain and angst of the men is more important. What about the woman, what does she think and feel and want?

Not to mention the sexist tendency of writers and web fandom to put the onus on the woman for the man’s mistakes- To act like she’s responsible for him/them, she’s supposed to take care of and do everything in her power to make him okay, to ‘fix’ him. It’s her fault for not taking care of this grown man and her fault that the man caused this damage, and not... The man’s fault for choosing to do all this because she doesn’t owe him anything. If anything he owes HER, we see how the Mysterious Woman went out of her way to be kind to this dude and give him recognition!

So the Woman mourns the Elktaur, the love they could’ve had... But ultimately, she finally absolves herself and recognizes that this is his fault. She’s not beholden to him, she doesn’t owe him love. And while she wishes he hadn’t been like this... In the end, HE was, and she and so many others had to deal with the fallout of it. And the Mysterious Woman blamed herself, because if only she’d done more or been kinder...!

So yeah, I think this whole arc was a bit of a meta commentary on sexism and how women are tossed around as trophies to be won with no agency, while simultaneously given the onus of being responsible for the feelings and thus actions of the men who yearn for them. This backstory is possibly a discussion on how these messages in media can harm and damage women watching them, who feel like it’s up to them to ‘fix’ toxic people, because who else will?

And then that applies to just about any toxic and possessive relationship... Like there’s something rather victim-blaming and gaslighting when the Nowhere King tells the Woman that he forgives her, as if she caused this! Maybe it was in reference to sealing him away, but she only did that because HE tried to kill everyone; “I did this for you,” he claims. But did she ask for it? Is it her fault that he chose to do this when she never asked, and is it her fault for choosing to reject it, when such humble gifts are meant to be unconditional and prepared for rejection?

It almost implies as if it’s the Woman’s fault for making things more difficult and bloody than they need to be, by not accepting this ‘gift’, and rendering the Nowhere King’s efforts and sacrifices ‘meaningless’. As if this violence only became senseless because the Woman didn’t justify it by accepting the gift. As if these deaths that could’ve been a necessary loss by accomplishing something were instead wasted by her, because the Woman didn’t want to go through with it and take the final step.

All in all, she did the right thing. The Mysterious Woman practiced some self-care by smashing Elktaur’s head in, taking a moment to mourn and pity but also take out some much-deserved anger; I’d argue it’s a very progressive, feminist storyline and victory for her! And honestly, I look forward to her friendship with the Beartaur, of all people- Yeah they sass one another but they’re actually relatively honest and open with each other. There’s more communication with these two over their issues than there’s ever been between the Woman and Elktaur, and I think about that a lot.

It’s funny, because I was wondering what their relationship was like, if the Beartaur moved into the Woman’s cave and she had to sneak back in to make additions to the mural, but no! It’s a totally open and relatively mutual arrangement between these two, and I love that weird yet human dynamic where these two bicker as roommates in Season 2.

Weird take incoming, but the Beartaur is already proving himself to be a better romantic candidate than the Elktaur, and if the Mysterious Woman ever makes room for romance in her heart again, he’s arguably the best and maybe only option she has! And yet the Beartaur would never act entitled to her love, all he asks is for the Mysterious Woman to be a cleaner roommate which is... A totally fair demand let’s be real. This might be just HIS cave and he lets her live there in exchange for lore.

And it’s kind of ironic but really fitting that this shlubby nerd of a dude who is a borderline basement dweller is like. A better companion to the Mysterious Woman, romantically or platonically. Simply because he never acts entitled to her love and just talks and communicates with her on the same level, while the Elktaur doesn’t.

Yeah the Beartaur is willing to glue live people but it’s because he knows what he wants and isn’t indecisive about it. He’s not a Nice Guy like Elktaur who is swimming in self-doubt, dude chooses to glue people because they make the best figurines, what about it? It’s not like this is because of some self-loathing or personal pity party, he is who he is, and that self-acceptance and communication is kind of why ‘jerks’ like him are preferred by women. The Beartaur owns who he is and will actually talk to the Mysterious Woman, and complain not over love he’s owed but just hygiene.

TL;DR There’s something very feminist, both in a meta and in-universe standpoint, about the Mysterious Woman reclaiming her agency and absolving herself to kill the Elktaur, and finally be rid of his possessive and destructive love that she blamed herself for. She’s finally free now, to live and breathe and love -herself and others- without guilt. And while it’s so tragic and unfair that it’s up to her to finish this and kill the Elktaur, even if it’s not her fault, at least the Woman finally got over if.

(And ftr I don’t hate Elktaur or his components. Well except maybe the General. I’m very emo over him/them too.)

It’s so messed up realizing the Elktaur is just as much the General as he is the Nowhere King; And that the General is just as much the Elktaur as the Nowhere King is. So when he’s singing that last lullaby before his death, keep in mind that’s also the General who is crying and accepting his fate, arguably, as much as it is the Nowhere King. And so I guess it’s easier to pity the Nowhere King and JUST him, while hating the General… But the Elktaur truly is both and thus the most mixed.

He suffered, but only because he himself was willing to inflict that suffering upon another, specifically himself; A poetically literal form of self hatred and cruelty. Karmic but also very much not. The Nowhere King’s tragedy came as a result of the Elktaur’s willingness to be cruel to another to get what he wants, and I am haunted over that. It’s easy to divorce the General from the Elktaur, but I really think one shouldn’t; And likewise, it probably isn’t a matter of the Elktaur being split into different halves, but ones purely identical in all but body.

The General did not take more conceit while the Nowhere King took more self-loathing, they were both equal and identical ratios of the Elktaur’s traits, the difference really is circumstance. And that’s gonna keep me awake at night, because it essentially is two AU versions of a character at war with one another; Like if there were two timelines where the Elktaur turned into just a human, or just an elk- And then they met!

Continuar lendo

I LOVED your meta-analysis of Tony in endgame! Can you do the homecoming edition with tony's facial expressions and feelings? thank you! x

Hi!

Of course, I’m sorry I took so long.

Well, Homecoming is my favorite irondad movie. Yes, it’s an irondad movie for me. We get to see the paternal side of Tony. It’s not a surprise for me or anyone that Tony can get paternal, you can tell he loves kids and gets along better with them than with most adults. He’s a natural on this.

Let’s start with the fact that Tony had a long emotional journey in Civil War, from getting nostalgic with clearing traumatic memories of his parents with technology, Charlie Spencer, his guilt over Ultron, the Accords, fighting with the Avengers to finding out the truth about said parents and getting betrayed in the process.

All of this.

And the first thing he decided to do after all of this?

Make sure Peter gets home.

Now, the most important thing you should notice about Tony in here is his posture. Look how relaxed and happy he looks, look at the way he’s sitting. After recently getting betrayed by a close friend, this is how he behaves around Peter. This is enough for me to believe that he blindly trusts Peter and that scares him. Since the moment he met him this is the thing that impressed me the most about their relationship. How easy things come for Tony when it comes to Peter. Trust is the main one.

Of course, it’s not all unicorns because this is Tony Stark. He probably noticed how quickly he was to trust Peter and how he behaves around him so he uses his typical mechanisms of defense to fight this.

One of my friends pointed out for me that on many occasions Tony tries to avoid eye contact with Peter.

Typical mechanism. Avoid eye contact, put on his glasses, mask on.

And that is not the only effort he made to put a distance between him and Peter, he uses the ‘’hands-off’’ mentor attitude and puts Happy like a wall between them. Look at his hand gestures, he’s trying to make this something casual. It’s his way of putting up a wall.

Also, this is not how we open the door for someone else, ok?

There were other ways to open the door for the kid.

And as soon as Peter is out of the car:

After a while of not getting in contact with the kid, Peter; the danger magnet he is, gets himself in trouble and we discover that Tony receives alerts every time the suit’s emergency parachute is activated or when it exceeds a certain altitude. We also discover Tony has a tracker on Peter’s suit and it’s not afraid to admit he put everything necessary in the suit. 

At first, he doesn’t appear to be shaken up by the fact that Peter almost died a few minutes ago but this is because he’s trying to remain calm. In the Homecoming Novelization, they give us the reason why Tony is in that place:

“So where are you?” I asked, looking around suspiciously. I half expected to see a drone in the sky spying on me.“India,” came the response. “I thought I’d hit up a Hindu temple. Center myself. That sort of thing.” Wow, I thought. I guess when you have Stark money, you can do stuff like that. “Thank God this place has Wi-Fi or you would have drowned.”

He’s trying to center himself. After saying ‘’Please, forget about the flying vulture guy’’ and trying to make Peter understand he needs to stay on the ground for his own safety and Peter failing to understand this, this is his dad reaction:

The angry-anxiety outburst. This man was having an anxiety attack throughout this scene. After not succeeding in getting a guarantee that Peter is going to be out of harm’s way, he goes into fight-or-flight mode and releases this little explosion. When you’re on your way to an anxiety episode that is very close to turning into a panic attack your body starts interpreting your anxiousness as a signal that you’ll need to stand your ground or escape from what you believe is a danger. What it’s most interesting to me in this is his reaction after the outburst. He’s not only confused as to why is he so angry or so fatherly invested in this kid, but he’s also experiencing his mind going “blank” as the fear and worry take over.

Almost like he’s asking himself ‘’Why am I acting like this?’’ ‘’What the hell was that?’’

And then saying: ‘’Sorry, teenager’’. Dad af.

And then we fully get to see what he’s trying to stay calm from. THIS. Anxiety can trigger this reaction. I believe what Tony is experiencing here is some sort of mechanism of physiological tremor caused by anxiety. This is how awesome RDJ’s performance is. He understands his character so much he can make these little decisions and add more depth into the character.

After this, he tells Peter it’s not too early to start thinking about college, since he went when he was 15 so for Tony, it’s never too early and he knows Peter is a genius kid. He understands Peter and he even acknowledged this when he said this: ‘’Listen, I know school sucks. I know you want to save the world. But… you’re not ready yet.’’ 

Then he calls Peter to tell him the FBI was about to ambush Toomes and his people but he also took the opportunity to congratulate Peter for his job on Washington. I love the sheepishly way he’s doing it, like this is new territory for him. 

But Peter at the moment is not appreciating the compliments because he has other things in mind. This is the moment you realize both of them are on different grounds. What many people don’t realize is that Peter is not only seeking approval, he’s trying to find a way to ensure his stay in Tony’s life. Notice how he asks Happy what’s going to happen to him when he realizes Tony sold the tower (He can feel Tony slipping further away from him) or when he tells Ned that he’s never going to come back to school since Tony is moving the Avengers upstate and blindly believes that If he brings Toomes to justice Tony is going to offer a place for him (He takes drastic measures). 

Meanwhile Tony is trying hard to be there for him but still at arm’s length. He gets a little offended when Peter doesn’t appreciate that effort and brush that off like it’s nothing. You know the thing that actually warms my heart? When he remembers the little stuff about Peter’s life. While Peter is trying to win his place in Tony’s life, Tony already has Peter in his heart, whether he knows about this or not.

Remember those conversations you have with your parents over the phone and they hear some weird background noise and they demand to know what’s going on? This is Tony in here. Also, the fact that he knew that Peter quit band six weeks ago. lol dad much?

Then the famous ferry confrontation. This is exactly the moment Tony lets Peter know in a very direct way he cares and a lot. Since the moment Peter accuses him of not caring, he doesn’t take his eyes off of Peter. 

He’s using anger as a way to let out the stress and worry he has over this kid. The little sniff, the way he continuously walks toward him, etc. He’s tired of being worried and explains to Peter that he’s the only one keeping faith in him because of how young he is and the more he explains, the more scared he gets. 

When things get to the point where he can’t stand it, ‘’it’s not working out’’ / = ‘’It’s not working out for me’’, he demands the suit back and dramatically says that this is something permanent. That this is a ‘’forever’’ decision. He believes that if he takes away the suit Peter is going to stop risking his life. And this decision probably hurts him more than it hurts Peter judging by the way he can’t even look at the kid when he asks for it. 

He heartbrokenly explains to Peter that if he dies then he feels that is going to be on him. He feels responsible for Peter and it’s heartbreaking because this is coming from him. This is not some misplaced way to fix things or a way to repair some old wounds. This is not his responsibility, he can easily go to this kid’s aunt and tell her what’s going on so she can deal with it but instead, he realizes he got emotionally attached to this kid and therefore no matter if he’s in the suit or not, Tony is going to feel responsible. Because he cares. Because he has a soft spot for him. Because he already has a place in his heart.

The way he grips his arm, another way to tell he’s on the verge of anxiety, again. And then he admits what’s been on his mind since meeting Peter: He wants him to be better than him. He already chose him. He wants him to be his better version. He recognizes Peter and him are similar in ways that scare him but he wants the flaws he sees in himself to disappear on Peter. He doesn’t want Peter to be like him. And he demonstrates this in the self-deprecating way he expresses it: 

Then Peter goes and still risks his life with or without the suit and Tony gets Happy to drive Peter to Avengers upstate. The first thing Tony does? Apologize to Peter for taking the suit and at the same time, he lets him know he did something wrong therefore he had it coming. Something he probably never got directly from his father; an apology and proof that he actually cared. 

He makes sure Peter knows he’s proud by fist-bumping his shoulder lol, side-hugging him and telling him he wants him on the team by showing him his new suit. 

Can we talk about this for a moment? Is this Tony’s version of putting the kid’s accomplishments on the fridge? He was going to show this to a lot of reporters and people when Peter ‘’announced’’ he was going to be an official member of the Avengers. Can we also acknowledge the fact that Tony keeps track of Peter so much that he knows bloggers write about spider-man and this time he’s bringing the big guns by picking up 50 real reporters to the case? D-A-D.

Then he gets rejected lol. Something he probably expected it. There’s no denying he felt rejected but not because Peter doesn’t want to be part of the Avengers, the part he feels rejected from is the ‘’mentoring’’ part. He did mention that with a little mentoring, Peter could be a real asset. He wants to be that mentor and now he’s ready to be more close to him.

He even takes the mask off.

But he still can’t keep eye contact with him, something he still does in Infinity War. Apparently, Peter’s big puppy eyes are lethal weapons for him. He can’t stand the admiration and gratitude coming from this kid’s gaze. He’s not used to this.

This is what I love the most about Homecoming. Proud!dad Tony. AT the end of the day, he’s proud that Peter chose to do the right thing and stay on the ground. He knows Peter is going to be the best out of all of them and this is the most gratifying accomplishment for him. 

Thank you for asking! I was going to make one from Peter’s POV, if you want it, please tell me! 

So since Endgame established that going back in time created alternate timelines/universes, here are the universes that they created (correct me if I missed one):

NOTE: Like Bruce said, they can’t change the past. Think of these points as alternate universes instead of the Avengers actually rewriting the timeline.

1) Alternate 2012: HYDRA thinks Captain America is on their side, Alternate Universe-Past-Cap thinks Bucky is alive based on MCU Cap telling him that, Tony is freaked out by his arc reactor randomly turning off, and Loki is free and running around with the Tesseract.

2) Alternate 2013: Frigga meets MCU Present Day Thor and Rocket steals the Aether from Jane Foster. Although the Reality Gem was returned, Frigga’s interactions with Thor might’ve changed her fate. Maybe she’s still alive in this timeline?

3) Alternate 2014: Thanos, Gamora, and Nebula of this universe disappeared from the timeline, so maybe Infinity War never happens. If it still happens, someone else takes Thanos’ place (Magus? Supreme Intelligence? Pick your favorite cosmic Marvel villain). The Guardians of the Galaxy never form. Black Widow is still around but there’s a version of her dead in this universe.

(Note: Gamora of the third universe is still around since she jumped to the MCU timeline / universe)

4) Alternate 1970: This is a long shot but maybe Tony Stark convinced Howard Stark to actually be a good dad, resulting in a timeline where Tony doesn’t grow up with an abusive dad. Also, Hank Pym loses a lot of his Pym Particles, which might affect his journeys as Ant-Man.

5) Alternate 1946: Steve marries Peggy and presumably stops HYDRA from growing inside SHIELD. Bucky is saved early as a result. Also, this does mean there are TWO Steve’s in this universe, MCU timeline Steve and still-stuck-in-ice-Steve. What happens to the frozen version of Steve, I don’t know. Maybe they thaw him out early? Imagine two Captain Americas teaming up with Peggy and Bucky to destroy HYDRA once and for all.

Can I just talk about the way Han and Leia act in the garbage compactor though?

They’ve only just met, they’ve only exchanged a few snarky remarks, everything’s been one moment of panic and danger after the next, she just got tortured and he’s in way over his head, but the moment those walls start closing, we see who they are and what their dynamic is going to be.

Leia’s first instinct is to take charge and try to find a solution. And Han doesn’t protest or argue, he just does what she says. Once it becomes clear that they can’t do anything, Han immediately switches to trying to get Leia out of danger. Captain I-Only-Care-About-Myself is desperately trying to help her climb up out of harm’s way, give her a little more time.

And the moment the danger is over? They hug. No snarky remarks, no innuendo, just “hey we’re alive isn’t that wonderful”. Both too relieved to remember the mask, for the moment. Neither of them have really come across as the hugging type and yet, here they are.

(gif credit)

The whole scene says a lot about them, individually and together, and I love it a lot.

Mike/Will Season 2, Episode 1: A Shot by Shot Analysis

Ok, here it is! The first installation of my shot-by-shot analysis series! 

Some things to know before reading: 

This series will go episode by episode and each post will discuss scenes that I think are relevant to understanding Mike and Will’s relationship. I’m publishing them as I write them, so I might miss things. If I do, I’ll be sure to include them later. 

This analysis focuses on what I think the Duffers’ intentions are as far as this pairing and what the Mike/Will scenes in season two could indicate about season three. It’s not always going to reflect that Byeler is endgame, because as much as I love Byeler (and I really do), I just don’t think it’s going to be canon, at least not in the way that we hope. Don’t despair, though. 

If you haven’t, read my Is Will Byers Gay? post first! It basically establishes my thoughts about Gay Will. Give it a reblog if you’re so inclined :) Note that I wrote it BEFORE I knew about the stranger things bible clipping which basically confirms it, which you can find here.

These are just my thoughts/opinions! Feel free to disagree, and please do! Just do so respectfully :) I wrote this because I love Stranger Things, something we ultimately all have in common. If you have negative/nasty opinions about this analysis or are offended by the suggestion that Will Byers is gay, I ask politely that you keep them to yourself. 

I couldn’t find gifs for everything I wanted :/ if someone knows a better way to do this, I’d appreciate the help!

Anyway, thanks so much for reading! I hope you enjoy! (Also: I’m tagging @packupyourthingses @leondrmccoys @we-dance-like-marionettes who (I think?) asked to be tagged, and @thebandersnatchoftheshire who expressed an interest in the post a while back.)

EPISODE 1: MAD MAX

Let’s start off with some general observations. 

In the first season, Will is missing, leaving his three best friends and Eleven to recover him. In the second season, Will is back, Eleven is gone, and Max has joined the party. Obviously, each of these changes makes a significant contribution to existing group dynamics. Mike, for example, changes significantly in the wake of Eleven’s departure, while Lucas and Dustin are overjoyed at Max’s arrival.

In season 1, storylines are segmented by age group. i.e., the kids, teenagers, and adults all embark on separate adventures that ultimately converge. As we would expect of a second installation, narratives in season two reflect character and story arcs established earlier. As a result, the groups are not so neatly divided. Ergo, Steve hangs with Dustin/Lucas/Max, Mike/Will end up with Joyce/Hopper, etc. 

Crucially, the core group of boys is divided into pairs. Mike and Will spend most of the season together, as do Dustin and Lucas. The use of these pairs, which are established almost immediately, is an unmistakeable narrative device all throughout the season.

1. Arcade

The arcade scene is the first in the season of all the boys together. They spend the first half of it together playing video games, arguing with Keith, etc, and the second half divided into pairs. This begins when Will is transplanted suddenly into the upside down and steps outside the arcade.

Lucas and Dustin, at that point, are preoccupied with divining MadMax’s true identity. Because of this, it’s Mike who comes out to check on Will, and likely the one who noticed he was missing in the first place. This is the first clue as to the extent of the closeness between the two. It’s deliberate: as we see here, and throughout the season, Will/Mike and Dustin/Lucas are partitioned, and their individual friendships are developed.

In the scene, Mike comes outside and finds Will. He then makes sure he’s okay, puts his arm around him, and guides him inside. This gesture, to me, reads as pretty innocuous physical affection (of course, you’re welcome to disagree). It was, however, a conscious stylistic choice, made by the duffers with the intention of communicating a number of things. In this scene, we begin to learn firstly that Mike and Will are close, and secondly, that Mike is protective of Will, concerned for his wellbeing, and (probably) an important source of emotional support. The arm gesture underscores Mike’s key character traits: his protectiveness, his characteristic warmth and compassion for others, and his ability to take charge when the situation calls for it and help those in need. 

Here’s why that matters: Mike’s behavior in this particular scene is especially interesting in the context of his recent character development. Eleven’s disappearance has clearly affected him profoundly, and in the first three episodes of the season, we learn just how much. Earlier in episode one we see him stealing from Nancy, and in a later scene with his parents, we learn that he’s acted out in a number of ways over the past year, all indicating that Mike’s moral compass, distinct and venerable in season 1, has weakened somewhat. Same goes for his trademark positivity and determination. This season he’s sullen, irritable, apathetic, and in [my paraphrasing of] Finn Wolfhard’s own words, “not as much of a leader.” 

And yet, Mike manages to be there for Will in that moment, to take note of his presence (or lack thereof), to guide him, to help heal him. It would appear that, in Mike’s moody “post-eleven period”, it is in his relationship with Will that he has remained his best self. 

The question is, WHY? In the first episode of Beyond Stranger Things, Finn Wolfhard remarks (and the Duffers agree) that in Eleven’s absence, Mike needs “someone to impress” and therefore “tries to impress Will”. I also agree with this interpretation. Romance aside, Mike and El’s relationship is (among other things) characterized by a deep mutual admiration. Will, who’s obviously vulnerable, is an opportunity for Mike to be important to someone again, to be needed. Because of this, Will in particular has assumed a new level of importance in Mike’s life post-eleven, because in a way, Will helps Mike cope with the trauma of his loss. And, of course, Mike is very important for Will, who needs someone compassionate, sweet and understanding to help him cope with his trauma. They’re bonded by shared horrifying experiences from season 1: Will going missing; Mike losing El. They are, for all intents and purposes, “crazy together”. 

I can’t say with certainty that their relationship has a new dimension/purpose/function in the wake of all that’s happened, because Will was missing for the entirety of last season and we saw basically nothing of their friendship, so it’s impossible to make a comparison. But, I predict that in the aftermath of season one, Mike and Will’s (already close) friendship matured and deepened, and it wouldn’t surprise me if the change in their friendship had an effect on Will and how he sees their relationship. 

What are the implications of this? It’s worth it to consider:

The effects of this close relationship on Will. How does he feel about his closeness with Mike, new or not? How does he feel about the reemergence of Eleven? I predict angst. Lots of it. 

The potential of a love triangle. There are a bunch of amazing posts about this, find some here and here. I’m not convinced we’ll get one, but it’s interesting to consider in the context of this analysis. Remember that Will and Eleven have never interacted (which I think is also deliberate). How will Mike balance his emotional responsibilities to both Will and Eleven? How will Will and Eleven adjust to each other, when each of them is emotionally significant to and in some form, emotionally reliant on, Mike Wheeler? (Not suggesting Eleven needs Mike, she obviously doesn’t need a man, but it would be silly to deny how much he means to her, and vice versa.) Consider also, that there are SO MANY parallels between Will and Eleven. SO MANY. There are a lot of posts already analyzing this, I’ll link one here.

That being said, I do think Mike and Will have always been close. There are hints to this even in season 1. Exhibits A and B.

2. Mr. Clarke’s room

The next shot we see of the boys is in Mr. Clarke’s classroom, just before Max is first introduced. They sit in two rows of two: Dustin and Lucas in front; Will and Mike in back. This, if just visually, emphasizes the “pairs” theory I discussed earlier. Dustin and Lucas look at and whisper to only each other. 

3. Will gets in Joyce’s car while Dustin, Lucas and Mike watch from a distance

The physical set up of this scene again is deliberate. Mike is in front, with Lucas and Dustin behind him. (If you think this is grasping at straws, try picturing the scene with Dustin up front - it changes the mood). All the boys are concerned; Mike especially so. The exchange is as follows: Lucas asks, “Do you guys think he’s okay?”, to which Mike says, “I don’t know, he’s quiet today”. Lucas responds, “He’s always quiet.”

Then, the camera zooms in on Mike’s particularly troubled expression. We, the audience, KNOW that all is not well. We KNOW Will had an episode the night before, which explains why “he’s quiet today”. Lucas dismisses Mike’s uncertainty, but WE know that Mike is right. This is supposed to tell us that out of the group, Mike is the most intuitive/perceptive when it comes to Will, and that Lucas and Dustin obviously care very deeply for Will, but don’t know him like Mike does.

4. Lucas and Dustin at the arcade.

In this scene, Lucas and Dustin are at the arcade, trying to figure out if Max is MadMax. Will isn’t there because he’s at Hawkins lab, but where is Mike? Mike is uninterested in Max from the beginning (and so is Will, for that matter, beyond wanting to figure out if she’s MadMax. I don’t think we ever see them interact directly). 

Mike is unessential to the scene, so there’s no real reason to have him there, but I thought it was interesting that they weren’t all hanging out. This scene demonstrates that Lucas and Dustin are a pair. They have shared jokes, a witty banter, and now a shared goal, which is to befriend Max. That goal bonds them and frames their eventual storyline of setting a trap for Dart.

5. Will drawing in his room

(Sorry guys - I couldn’t find a screencap of the line I wanted; if you find one where Will says Mom, Dustin, Lucas, Everyone” PLEASE let me know!)

When Will takes Jonathan to task for treating him like a baby, he implicates “Mom, Dustin, Lucas, everyone”. The only person he doesn’t mention is Mike, which is interesting, because so far, Mike is the only one of the friend group we’ve seen express concern for Will in any capacity. This is ABSOLUTELY on purpose. Again, it emphasizes their close relationship and alludes to a symbiosis: later in the exchange, Will says “It doesn’t help. It just makes me feel like more of a freak.” Perhaps he doesn’t feel alienated by Mike’s help because Mike has been through something similar, which makes him also a freak.

It’s worth it to mention that Will has no screen time alone with any of the other characters. I think it’s probably because the writers felt the only relationship of Will’s they needed to emphasize was with Mike. 

SO…

That’s it for episode 1! Let me know if there’s anything I missed! 

everybody always makes the marauders out to be super cool and suave but dude

they had codenames

they named their own friendship group

as far as i can tell only aBSOLUTE DORKLORDS DO THAT

how much do you wanna bet the entirety of hogwarts refused to call them ‘the marauders’ and they got all grumpy abt it

How Big is the Leviathan?

Anyone remember the Leviathan from Atlantis the Lost Empire? 

If ya don’t remember here’s the scene.

One thing I remember was the SIZE of the Leviathan. It was the biggest thing I’d seen on screen at the time. But I always wondered HOW big was it? I assumed it was like Kaiju sized. Most Kaiju are around 300 feet.

Yea the submarine in Atlantis is as big  as Godzila. That…kinda surprised me.

So…IF the Ship is around 380 feet how big is the Leviathan?

So…my calculations are probably off, but I just wanted to get a better sense of size of the Leviathan. And uh….It’s over 3,050 feet!

THAT THING IS MASSIVE!!

IF I’m wrong! Please Correct me! Cause I can’t imagine this is right!

A Study in Dean’s Oral Fixation

No one can convince me otherwise; Dean has a wonderful glorious oral fixation, and I have the proof my friends.

Now, there is quite a bit to cover here, so lets start with…

First of all, Dean is so fucking cute when he does this, it kills me slowly. Second of all, along with biting objects he also licks/bites his lips quite frequently.

He does it around Cas a lot (I just didn’t want to clog the post up with all of his heart eyes), which I’d assume is some kind of nervous tic, but he also just does it without any reason and I’m perfectly fine with that. It’s mostly an impulsive thing.

Next we have…

Dean literally eats all the time, and he always eats the same exact way. He always take really big bite and really fills his mouth with food. (which, I, myself having an oral fixation, can vouch for it feeling nice.) He also almost always makes that blissed out amazed face at every food he eats (although its cut out in some of these gifs). He’s that friend you have that’s way too excited about food and always moans just a little too passionately while eating pizza.

Next up we have…

We can all address the fact that Dean drinks a little more alcohol than he should, but God, have you ever looked at the way he drinks it? He always pushes the entire rim of the bottle into his mouth, almost never drinking from just the side unless it’s a glass and he’s forced to. He also presses his tongue to the bottle as well, which you can clearly see on the 5th gif down from here. Jesus, it is pornographic to watch the way his lips stretch around every bottle. That boy drinks with his lips and enjoys every second of it. Seriously, watch the way he lets his lips drag over the bottle and closes his eyes in almost all of these, you might need to grab a towel for your nether regions.

And then we have this last one…which may be the most important.

This one shows that Dean’s drinking is an impulse; he’s driven to do it without even thinking. I certainly believe that Dean has this impulse to satiate his oral fixation needs because Every. Damn. Time. he has got a drink in front of him he is opening his mouth wider than the fucking grand canyon. Anyway, next we have…

Sure, sure, sure, Dean’s probably done some cunnilingus with some chicks (and praise the lord for that mouth, I’m sure he’s made plenty of pretty girls scream with that silver tongue of his), but as a firm believer that Dean enjoys dick in his mouth I’d like to talk about dick in Dean’s mouth.

As I said before, I have an oral fixation, a very bad (good?) one at that. I’m also a sub (and honest to god, kill me if Dean isn’t because damn that needs its own post all together.) so enjoying things in my mouth is something that can be used to my advantage. Personally, I’m exclusively attracted to men but my oral fixation leads me to think about orally pleasuring women and enjoying it, so even if you (for some god awful reason) think that Dean Winchester is this straight as a beanpole guy, he, having an oral fixation, has probably thought about having a dick in his mouth.

If you really need any evidence of how much Dean would enjoy sucking cock just look at this photo for a while.

Seriously, you could photoshop a dick in there if you had skill. (pretty please can someone do it?)

Alright, alright, so lets get to the last one here…

I was a little skeptical about what the hell being sarcastic amd having that kind of no-verbal filter personality had to do with oral fixation, but Mr. Sex scientist Freud over here says so and I have that personality so it must be true.

I mean…Dean is the sarcasm king- oops I mean princess.

…So maybe he really does have a massive oral fixation. Because he does. Look ma, I did research! You see, I’m not crazy, I have proof!

Anyway, take it or leave it, but I have a strong headcanon that Dean has an oral fixation. This post is dedicated to @bottomsub-dean because oral fixation.

meta lately: hello :) we've made these handy little updates that'll make your life oh so hellishly more difficult for the next few months *force-feeds me confetti with a spoon*

My question is: what is Steve Rogers’s body count? … We don’t talk about that a lot because he’s an American Hero ™ and American Heroes don’t ever actually kill people even when they’re, you know, soldiers in the actual fucking Army.  The American Hero has to show mercy and give everybody a second chance and any time the Bad Guy dies, it has to be because he made a mistake that lead to his own death.  The hero can never actually just fucking murder him in our stories because that would be wrong and a true American would never do something like that.

So, like, has Steve Rogers ever shot a dude in the face?  Has he ever snapped anybody’s neck?  Has he ever been struggling for his own life and used his shield to take a life?

If you have either canon comics knowledge or just Opinions and Feelings, please feel free to share.  Because, like, dude was a soldier in WWII on the European Front fighting Nazis, kicking open doors with gun literally blazing, so he’s obviously killed people, but we never discuss this.  How does Steve reconcile killing?  Does he feel guilt?  Is he comfortable with his actions?  Has he killed people since he got pulled out of the ice?  How does he feel about taking human lives?  Does he talk to anybody about it?  Does he just internalize it and let it eat him up inside?