Sorrow - Blog Posts
(via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h-wTrCBABzM)
I don't think I'll fall in love again.
Not after seeing you like this.
The most painful thing that ever happened to me was you.
You exist,
but you're not mine.
And it drives me insane in ways that I never even dared to dream.
I can't unlove you.
And I can't unsee you.
I am stuck knowing that you're out there,
but that you'll never be mine.
The only thing I can do now is sleep,
hoping I'll see you in my dreams.
I'll gladly wait for night to come,
if you'll be mine atleast in the nightmares I have at dawn.
In that unnamed hour of existence,
between the moments of night and day,
maybe I can finally call you mine.
I look up to see his beautiful face.
His eyes are filled with fresh tears.
But there's a smile on his lips.
It seems so true and real.
Yet I know it's far from that.
When his voice cracks as he speaks,
a deep sadness washes over my being.
I can feel it spreading through me.
Touching every secret corner and creek.
I don't know what to do now.
Who do I take care of first, him or me?
I ask myself, as I hold his face with my shaking hands.
His tears are so warm as I wipe them away.
His smile fades and he falls onto me.
While he breaks in my arms quietly,
I let my tears fall finally.
There's only so much strength I have in me.
And I'll use every last bit to piece him back together.
Because I don't know how to be without him.
I don't know why I am, without him.
Without him, I stay a blue question mark.
With him, I'll be a warm full stop.
© Moonyloonywitch
Bitch don’t kill my vibe.
May 2025, Bologna
Kate Chopin, from The Awakening
She believes she knows my ache,
she thinks she understands my sorrow,
because once, she too was broken.
My pain is
a slow implosion,
a daily funeral
with no mourners,
a storm I must swallow
so she may walk beneath clear skies.
She remains with another,
while I cradle her chaos in the dark,
I try hold her world steady,
bleeding in silence,
so she never sees the stain.
Quietly tearing at the seams
just to keep her whole.
I laugh when I want to scream.
I smile so she can cry.
I disappear so she can shine.
And each day,
I wake inside a coffin
just to hold her hand.
This doesn't feel like love.
This is a man burning
so she may feel warm,
and never knowing
that the smoke
is me.
-Cyrus K.
From a “Vow Of Hate” by Lylah James.
Your mouth tastes of cigar and sorrow,
I like the way my name sounds on your lips.
But your smile will fade come morrow.
It is wintry and I am lonely,
Please come back.
Your mouth tastes of cigar and sorrow,
I like the way you hold me,
Even when I know it is all a ruse – a bleeding arrow.
For you still envisage her when you bed me.
Your mouth tastes of cigar and sorrow,
I like the way you touch me,
So coldly, like the dead wings of a sparrow,
And I have begun to crave your warmth.
Your mouth tastes of cigar and sorrow,
I do not like the way you left me without a second glance,
After your soft caress had been so thorough.
Please come back.
Maybe all that we want is already taken— no matter how much we cry, yearn, lament, we never seem to get what we seek.
After a battle.
