Tf2 Demoman - Blog Posts
They both friends.
My boys😭
I just thought about it, so why no?
idk if youve done it yet but i would actually lose my mind if you did an analysis for demo
Aye aye captain 🫡 Time to overdramatize again!
Let's address Demo's wounds
(Demo's backstory was changed through the years but I'm sticking to the older version because I find it more grounded)
Demoman's story is easily one of the most tragic of all the mercs. Imagine you have been abandoned from birth, your parents simply rejected you for what you are. But luckily you have been adopted by some good people who replaced your parents and made you a relatively happy child.
And then you accidentally kill them. You're 6 years old. How does that feel?
I can't even imagine how a child's brain can't comprehend the idea of being a murderer. It was an accident, of course, they were blown up by a big explosion he created (genius kid found out how to do that, huh?) but still. His parents were dead and he knew it was his own fault. He learned he was dangerous as he is.
How was it like pondering about it in the orphanage?.. "I didn't want this! I want to go back and fix it, I'm so sorry", something like that. But he couldn't go back in time, so being covered in such an avalanche of guilt, he learned he needs to repress himself.
Demo have always had an explosive temper (no pun intended), it was his true nature, pure emotion: if he's happy, it's 100%; if he's angry, it's a full blown storm. If he loves, he loves with all of his heart, and he has a big one.
Living on the impulse, all or nothing, that crucial accident revealed that letting his true nature go will only end up as destruction in the end. Irreparable damage.
We don't know what exactly was happening to him during his orphanage years, but if I'm to guess, repressing everything about him: his interests, his character, his whole nature, was a thing to choose. He thought that he had to become still and quiet as to not to repeat that kind of tragedy ever again. He probably didn't have people to be friends with either, either because people rejected him for his past, or he avoided them himself due to his internalized shame, at least that's a guess.
But everything repressed returns to the surface sooner or later. As a child, living for so long under overwhelming guilt, grief, hate, pain and sadness, under the skies that are almost never sunny in a all-year-long damp and coldness of the Ullapool. Incomprehensibly grey. It was depriving.
He was always fascinated with explosions. He didn't touch it for a long time, but maybe something like seeing fireworks again one day made something inside him tremble... And to remember.
Explosions. Launch... Acceleration... Release. And every time the release happens, his soul fills with excitement, the body feels lighter and shivers go up the spine. Release happens inside his head too, for the explosions make his worries and pain go away for a moment.
He couldn't find another way to release his bottled up emotions, so gradually he returned to make explosives again.
It was something like an addiction. Similar to pyromania, except no one bothered to research this one. At the moment of explosion he could let his anger out, he could scream, he could run around freely, he could sense heat in his chest; he could be himself. As he once was.
Everything was cold. But the explosions were hot.
He thought it was under control, just a little bit of KABOOM after school, but he craved more and more every time, more vivid, more violent...
That's how he lost his eye. (...Was it a subconscious act of selfharm?)
The missing eye was a forever reminder of how deviated he actually was. He learned that he couldn't repress or change what he truly is - a monster. A Black Scottish Cyclops, wether it were his peers who called him like that or he himself, out of misery. There was indeed something seriously wrong with him.
It seemed like the only thing he was capable of is destruction. Destruction is the only environment he's comfortable with. Peace was always so anxious and depriving, and breaking things felt calming, so he figured it must be right.
And then his birth mother came and took him back, "now that's he's a worthy DeGroot". It was unexpected but... Pleasant. So he wasn't THAT worthless after all, huh? Turns out, it was really familial, the destruction thing. At least he found out that there was a reason behind all of this.
His new mom was, saying honestly, pretty cruel with words. She was not at all gentle, she was very strict, demanding and straight up abusive. It was never enough for her no matter what Demo did. She didn't want results from his work, she's just always wanted to mess with his brain.
And for whatever reason... This setup felt right for him. To be thrown around like that, to be humiliated harshly, it felt fitting, it wasn't causing anxiety or anything. He has to be a scapegoat, he had to forget about being a child and to start working as an adult, at the same time somehow replacing a father he still didn't have, but it felt good enough. Confusing relationships felt good enough.
Destruction was his habitat, and his heart could no longer accept anything else.
Cruelty wasn't warm though, just familiar, just an environment to not to go insane. But he craved warmness so badly... Yet every time he would get close to someone and receive a little gentleness and care, it would feel sickening. It felt unnatural, it reminded him of his lost parents and of everything that's wrong about him.
The only warmness his body could accept was alcohol, making him bubbly and comfortable and relaxed. He almost felt normal, happy even. Alcohol heat made him melt, and he felt so fulfilled as if he was in paradise, back to the womb.
Yet after the effect wears off, he feels lonely as ever. Quickly, existing without alcohol becomes pain. Existing at all. He became an addict.
Not that everyone he met rejected him, rather, he subconsciously reached out to those who would be cruel to him. Again, gentleness hurts wether he knows it or not. He's only good in destruction.
Lonely and clingy, ready to overshare, overall mess yet carrying a big baggage of love that has no one to give it to. Maybe because he can't give it to himself in the first place. There's so many issues unresolved because he can't handle them alone, yet there's no one to help since he was already trapped in a closed circuit of self sabotage.
He will keep acting like a party beast, always crazily emotional and overdone upbeat, a simple drunken man who will not be taken seriously that way. Maybe that's what he wanted, to not be seen as deep by anyone for not be reminded of his misery once again.
Seems like we bought that too.
...
The enemy Soldier might be an exception though. The man he really treasures his friendship with turned out to be an enemy; repeating the rule again: it's only acceptable when dangerous. Soldier deeply cares for Demo, however he's not gentle or pitying, he's as destructive and explosive as Demo is, and these two are a very rare perfect combination of destructing each other in the act of love. Both broken beyond repair, soul on soul, forever to be misunderstood by the outsiders. This is something about this relationship that looks like a golden lining.
They will not fix each other, but they sure are going to have a good time!
Last post's timelapse
//Somehow this work made me SO tired, even though the last session lasted only about 3 hours I suddenly felt so weak I immediately dozed off (even though I had enough sleep hours before that and it was definitely too early to go to bed). And then I napped for 7 hours, still feeling like my blood have been sucked off as I'm writing it. Yeah low-key feels like I'm dying right now.
Maybe this piece is cursed. Be careful.
"I'm only valuable when..." of TF2 mercs
Personal mental stereotypes they follow, yet will never admit aloud. An analysis:
(Headcanons but I tried to be as compliant as possible)
Scout: I'm only valuable when people see me as cool and tell me that I'm cool... 'Cuz that means, it must be true...
(Constantly comparing himself to everyone, barely knows his true self, struggles to be alone)
Pyro: I'm only valuable when I have friends to care about! If there's none... It's so cold and lonely...
(Fear of abandonment? Fear of betrayal. Urges for revenge)
Soldier: I'm only valuable when my community needs me! I am all about loyalty and faith!
(Strongly identifies with the place or beliefs he belongs to, constantly feels threatened.)
Demo: I'm only valuable when people find me fun to be around. As soon as it gets sad, everyone leaves.
(Numbing his emotional pain in substances because he has no idea how to handle it, especially since these emotions push people away time and time again. Feelings of helplessness.)
Heavy: I am only valuable when I can protect people. Although I understand, when people are able to stand for themselves, it feels like my purpose is gone...
(Being protective is his identity. If he's not a big human shield for the people he cares about, who is he?)
Engineer: I'm only valuable when my ideas become reality. While I'm still alive, my mission in life is to make as many creations as I can.
(His work is more important than his personhood. He's the Engineer first, Connagher last)
Medic: I'm only valuable when people need very specific solutions to very specific situations. Let's say, some of these situations were also a work of mine.
(Too genius of a mind struggles to fit into the "normal" flow of things. Extending what's possible.)
Sniper: I'm only valuable when I'm useful. When my help is irreplaceable. Otherwise, why am I even here?
(Struggles with "fitting in" and finding a community/genuine connections. Doesn't believe there's anything to him besides his work)
Spy: I'm only valuable when people can look up on me, when they admire me and want to be like me. Or, otherwise, when they hate me and believe that I'm the only cause of their suffering. It's never too much when it comes to praise.
(Extremely fragile ego)
I hope you guys have a happy Valentine's day
I FUCKING SPELT VALENTINE WRONG😭
this is the greatest day of my fuckinng life I LOVE JURASSIC PARK OH M YGOD
TF2 x JP
Team Fortress 2 x Jurassic Park movie AU (Pt.1/ Pt.2)
Somebody stole Sniper's glasses.
since Demo canonically has at least 3 jobs, then being a chief engineer doesn't sound very far-fetched in another universe, eh, eh? Ray Arnold smokes constantly which sounds too much like a Spy thing. Had hard time choosing btwn Medic and Engi to be John Hammond - god complex and such.
ong…… ong… ong…… ong…….
Ignore how detailess the ears are I was to tired to do them😣💖 (still balling my eyes out after rewatching emesis blu😭)
Demo man right after this scene 🥺💖
greatest thing to ever grace my page
Stock Weapons pt 2!! + extras! (Soilder, Spy, Medic, Pyro, Heavy, Merasmus) I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT GUNS!!!!!!
pt 1 pt 2 pt 3 pt 4
hi guys. this one js for @rumplebouttostealurskin
but also mostly for me. look at them. i love them!
boots and bombs drawing #198283939229 the first one ive put on tumblr tho!
here's how post time-skip hopscotch can win
HEAR ME THE FUCK OUT
thoughts on ur team’s Demoman?
Tho he’s drunk most of the time and has no sense of boundaries what so ever,, I have a small soft spot for him. He can be very sweet at times, comforting too.
He also has a fat ass. 10/10
Hey spy! quick question of uhh… no importance. But if I were to lay a trap for demoman, what would be the best thing to use?
I though about scrumpy but I don’t know which brand.
DO NOT USE JUST SCRUMPY.
You HAVE to use red wine, vinegar, and scrumpy to have it work, he will know if it’s just scrumpy.
Also when you captured him, bring him to my smoking room I need to brush and re-braid his hair.
Yay
I have a lot of progress on what's supposed to be the banner for the tf2 ask blog. Asks are currently closed. But we will be ready soon!
Happy Mid-Autumn Festival everyone!!
More swordvan ig
Also i am still taking requests, if yer interested check my pinned post.
Some swordvan and bomb voyage scene