Bartylus Is Not Bartylus If They Don't Have An Unhealthy Obsession With Each Other

platonic bartylus is them making out in the slytherin common room when everyone is asleep, regulus helping barty put his tie on just for barty to mess it up again for the aesthetic, studying in the library and barty trapping regulus’ foot between his, taking every single elective together, being unbearably in love with each other, sneaking sweets in their robes to eat when they can’t sleep at night and they crawl into bed together whispering so they don’t wake the others

you know, i totally get that people want to stick to regulus being tough and cruel because we have softened him too much, and i agree at the most part, but i also feel like regulus is so sensitive. he was a caring, loving child, the complete opposite of who he became. so within that, if you find a way in, he becomes just as sickenley loving. he cannot bare anything casual. he loves with his whole being. consumes. engulfs. he sleeps with stuffed animals. he needs barty to hold his hand when he panics in class. he is, in the words of mistki, a tall child.

stay with me

Barty was moping.

Again, he knows- him and Regulus had gotten into an argument again, and he knew he’d lost, but he liked the thrill of arguing- and he’d said some things he really shouldn’t have… but maybe Regulus would see how sorry he was by the way he was being so mope-y. Yeah, maybe- he was curled up in his four-poster, moodily skimming through his potions book- how does that not scream “I’m sorry please come back and love me so I don’t think you hate me”?

Regulus, on the other hand, was- rather haughtily, in Barty’s opinion- ignoring Barty, and playing wizard’s chess with Evan on the other side of the room. Barty gave a dramatic sigh… still nothing. Damn it. He was being so obvious about it, why wouldn’t Reg just forgive him already?

Barty had basically already apologized, with how much of a show he was giving about it- but clearly, Regulus wanted a real one. Damn him, making Barty do all the work.

“Castle to E5,” Regulus had been saying, just as Barty flopped down onto the ground behind him, shoving himself up against the Black’s back, his cheek smushed against in the back of his sweater. Barty’s sweater.

“I’m sorry.” He finally mumbled, rather pitifully.

Barty couldn’t see it, but he could definitely sense the smirk he just knew was plastered on Regulus’ face right about now.

“Sorry, Crouch, what was that? Couldn’t quite hear you.”

“I said, I’m Sorry.”

“For?”

Barty just huffed, going quiet for a moment. His fingers lightly traced Regulus’ spine through his clothes, from his neck to his tailbone, and back up.

“I’m sorry Regulus for saying you’re a teacher’s-pet…”

Barty finally muttered, poking the middle of Regulus’ back, just to punctuate.

Regulus was surely grinning by now, he loved it when-

“Even if you really are.”

Barty really shouldn’t have tacked that last bit on, as he quickly found himself flattened on the ground, because Regulus had decided to forcibly lean back, right on top of him.

“Bitch.”

“Twat.”

“…love you.”

“Love you too, Barty.”

Evan took that moment to finally butt in, cooing,

“Aww, you guys are so swee-“

It was safe to say that Evan didn’t get to finish his sentence, and there was ‘magically’ one pawn now across the room.

Bad: "If you were stuck on a deserted island with Pili, and you were starving, do you think you would eat him?"

Pangi: "Wow- I- No, I don't think I would eat Pili, I don't think I could."

Bad: "So, you won't eat him, that means you don't consider Pili a real friend."

...

Pangi: "Are you trying to normalize cannibalism, Badboyhalo?"

Bad: "Cannibalism?"

...

Pangi: "You- you know I'm a human, right? I'm flesh and bone."

Pili from out of nowhere who's been silent this entire time: "So you're a furry!"

Remus: When you die, you don’t know you’re dead. It’s only difficult for everyone else

Remus, turning to James and Sirius: It’s the same when you’re bloody stupid

regulus and barty who have the same piercings but on opposite sides of each other.. that’s it. they just want to look like one whole

platonic or romantic those two are soulmates and no will take them away from me

“You know how to ball, I know Aristotle”

But it’s Regulus, who’s the best quidditch player in Slytherin and Barty, who reads muggle philosophy when he’s bored

Everytime I see something about Bartylus, Prongsfoot, Moonwater, ect. And the comments are ‘aww so best friends so platonic 🥰’ I start gnawing at the bars of my enclosure

quick reference for my character on Ovis Origins !! A mc modded server by @/galatovis (twitter)