Australopithecunt - The Biggest Haw To Ever Yee

I have this reoccurring nightmare where I order an extra cheesy pizza and I end up with THAT one instead. You know the one. Worst dream I've ever had, I hate-order ten pizzas every time I have it.

Actually, amab non binary people are super cool and hot and they can do whatever the fuck they want.

Behold, one tiny alien baby kitten.

Working in a university is wild because in the same shift I can go from grading student papers to literally transcribing journal entries about a man's sexual experiences from the 1700s (literally its just bad, fuck that guy).

The next line of happy meal toys will be based on the unibomber

Jotaro: What do you have?

Atom Heart Father: A KNIFE

Jotaro: NO!

literally my favorite type of tweet

a vampire stands on the front porch of a farmhouse and says “i cannot come in unless i am invited”. the vampires friend, a cowboy, says “cmon, you know youre always welcome here, partner.” the vampire begins crying.

here are some threads on twitter who are willing to help if you are in need of resources or are asking for some in DC right now

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