bees-are-mean

Latest Posts by bees-are-mean

I think a " No Robins" AU would be really cool, because while yes, there's no Batman without Robin, can you IMAGINE the cuteness?

By " no robin" I don't mean the boys (Dick and Jason, but later everyone else) stay home, completely unaware of their Goth rat father fighting crime. They absolutely know he's batman and they ABSOLUTELY want kicks in.

But Bruce won't just let his children dive head first in Gotham’s crime pool. So he does what he does best; Pretend.

" B! Are we there yet?"

" Almost. Finish your chocolate milk so Jason can finish his."

" He's always copying me!"

" No I'm not!"

" nO iM nOt, "

Jason kicking his little legs in the child seat? Adorable. "B!"

Bruce is simply blocking this out. He's been driving in circles for two hours and when they finally fall asleep, he takes care of business, gets the robbers tied up, and by the time the boys wake up, he's like,

" You caught them. Good job."

The GCPD has to be useful SOMEHOW, so Gordon and Martinez take them to help look for "evidence." Yes, the evidence happens to be at the park

Even the Rogues are on board? Selina doesn't mind playing hurt when Dick hits her with a "batarang" from the local toy store. She decides to take it over the top and play dead, going limp,

" You killed her!" Jason screeches, because they LIKE Selina,

Bruce, completely calm as Tim pokes a shaking Selina with a stick, " Robin. What have you done."

Naturally, Dick wails, but luckily, she miraculously "comes back to life" and tells them cats really do have 9 lives. " You owe me so many diamonds, baby"

Bruce shrugs, patting Dick on the back, " You owe me therapy money,"

" Tch. Rich prick."

Harley and Ivy "fight" the birds a lot, but it's just Harley complimenting and hyping up Dick's gymnastics while Ivy swings them around with vines like carnival rides,

When Harley's "arrested", she pulls Bruce aside and is like, " Hey, maybe look into ADHD and autism, pretty sure they all have it, "

" Impossible? That's genetic. I have neither."

" ...1) They're adopted. 2) I have some news for you."

Harvey WILL kill Bruce on sight if he ever tells ANYONE he helped Jason and Tim tie him up with jumping cords. It's already bad enough that video of him slipping on bubblegum bombs (deactivated) is viral

" Okay, now three loops and around, -- Jason, that's a cat bridge."

" I'm NOT Jason Mr. Dent!"

" Right, ROBIN, -- can you at least gag this motherf-- this jerk? Jesus, Oswald, what'd you eat, death?"

Oz, tied back to back with Harvey, with marker all over his face, " Your MOTHER. I'M tired, KID, When's your old man coming back?"

" Dad says that if you miss bed time, you explode. Are you gonna explode, Mr. Penguin?"

"... I'm concerned that you're excited about it."

no saint ever watched over me, not like you have.

redbubble prints | ig | twt

jesper fanboy moment

i love every part of six of crows and all the ships but it also defines found family and soulmates so well because every crow loves every other in such a specific and perfect way, the kind that reminds you this is a group of teenagers who are fighting the world but still have all this capacity for love.

you have kaz and inej’s best friends to lovers, their little window-sitting routine where they don’t need to talk to feel each other. you have nina and inej’s waffle dates and complaints about boys and faith in each other. you have wylan and nina’s little scheme with smeet, the way he’s impressed with her and the way she teases about bullying him. you have wylan and matthias, matthias wondering if he’ll have to intercede while kaz has his cane to wylan’s throat, wylan considering matthias the naive one of them. you have matthias and jesper, jesper being the flirt and matthias getting embarassed by him and thinking he’s hilarious, jesper thinking matthias has this heart full of honor. you have jesper and nina, both flirting ketterdam into submission, dealing with their at first ignorant boyfriends, sharing camaraderie. you have nina and kaz, the obnoxious completely platonic flirting and the grudging respect for each other’s skills, the two of them playing each other but still being in each other’s corner. you have kaz and wylan and the way kaz sees himself in wylan and wylan sees a figure to respect in kaz, kaz telling wylan to have no shame in who he is, falling on top of a table together. you have wylan and inej and their mutual bond dating two idiotic brothers, the oft underestimated ones of the group, finding peace in each other as people who want to be good. you have inej and jesper and their care for each other, their mutual crush on kaz and the sheer angst jesper feels when he realizes he may have hurt her. you have jesper and kaz who are like brothers but first and foremost best friends, two boys who just want the other to be better, who understand each other’s weaknesses better than themselves. you have kaz and matthias, the druskelle and the demjin, the teasing that comes from a grudging and then deserved sense of mutual respect. you have matthias and nina and falling in love after a shipwreck, protecting someone even in death, finding each other, dreaming of each other. you have matthias and inej and bonding over religious conviction, matthias thinking inej is too good for kaz and inej teasing that he isn’t enough for nina. you have jesper and wylan and a kiss that feels like a gunshot, the teasing and falling in with a love for each other’s skills, for the ability to understand each other so intimately, the spin of a makker’s wheel.

they love each other so much.

Based on their friendship dynamic and the fact that Kaz is always fully covered in at least 2 layers of clothing if not 3-4, Jesper would absolutely start making "he's naked " jokes anytime Kaz so much as rolls up his sleeves.

Kaz: *loosens his tie and undoes his collar after a long evening at the Van Eck manor*

Jesper: okay whore

this is why i love jesper.

Matthias really goes from this:

to THIS:

✨character development✨ (or the slow corruption of one Matthias Helvar)

Kaz Brekker is literally the biggest secret shipper of all the crows and no you can’t change my mind.

He’s literally just like “I’m gonna leave Matthias and Nina to bury this dead body together, hope that doesn’t bring up any feelings, wouldn’t want their animosity to get in the way of the mission, only reason I’m doing this of course”

And then in the ice court just “oh Matthias and Nina walking with Brum, I’ll just leave them alone to totally not hash out their feelings because I trust matthias and his stupid undying love for her, this is good for the mission, all about the mission”

And then “guess I better send Wylan off to visit his “dead” mother and Jesper should go with him totally so they don’t have to emotionally support each other, it’s because I need to keep Wylan motivated, the mission is too important”

And then “I better pay off Inej’s debts to Per Haskell because I need her for the mission only for the mission who said anything about feelings—”

This man is a romantic okay??? Buys his not-quite-girlfriend a ship and finds her long lost parents??? Assigns the couples as pairings during missions half the time???

But also he’ll gauge your eyes out if you ever say anything about it so shhhh

I have so many stories of them I haven’t fleshed out yet…

Harry Potter Headcanons that are *chef’s kiss* Beautiful to me

- POC Harry and Hermione  

- Harry and Ginny are both bi, but they still end up with each other. 

- While I don’t really ship Harry and Draco together, Draco had a crush on Harry and was scared and unsure about it. 

- Neville is trans, and when he visits his parents at St. Mungo’s to tell them, they manage to convey their support. 

- Lupin loved both Sirius and Tonks. If Sirius hadn’t died, he probably would never have married Tonks, but she was good for him after the fact. 

- Albus Severus being named pretty much anything else, unless it’s “Albus Severus Potter, you aren’t named for a profound reason. You mom and I just drew names out of a hat because why not?” 

- Ron and Hermione have a happy marriage. They acknowledge their different talents and manage to make time for their children. 

- Albus and Scorpius like each other, platonically and romantically. 

- Charlie Weasley is asexual, and has a few pet dragons of his own that are his children. 

- Dean and Seamus were a thing, but they broke up during the fifth book due to Seamus being a jerk about Harry. They got back together at the end of HBP. 

- In his group of buddies, Ron is The One Straight Friend, but he is super accepting and always makes sure everyone’s treated equally. 

- Dudley has a magical child, and reaches out to Harry for advice. 

- Percy and Oliver got together. 

- When he was in school, Sirius kissed nearly every girl in his year, despite being gay. This stopped when he and Remus got together. 

- Harry becomes a Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. 

- Seamus is the firework tester for Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes. 

- A little while after their school years, Luna and Neville begin a relationship. (I’m sorry I really ship them)

- Harry had a crush on Cedric Diggory. 

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Crack

Cedric: What did you want to tell me, Harry?

Harry: Have my babies

Cedric: ...

Harry: I mean, the first task is dragons

---

McGonagall: Potter, who is your partner for the Yule Ball?

Ron: *kicks down the door while in a stunning blue dress and four-inch heels*

Ron: It's me, bitches.

---

Ron: My dad sent you this to help with the second task

Ron: *opens up box to reveal a bunch of rubber duckies*

---

Harry: Can you give me advice on how to talk to girls?

Sirius: *stares at Harry blankly while the Mii theme plays*

---

*Quidditch world cup*

Arthur: Hey, where's Percy?

Harry: I'll go check

*five minutes later*

Harry, traumatized: He's fucking my old Quidditch captain

---

Draco: *sees Harry and Ron dancing at the Yule Ball*

Draco: MY FATHER WILL HEAR ABOUT THIS

*later*

Draco, writing a letter: Dear Father, I have never been so heart broken or betrayed

Harry Potter’s era Head canons.

1. Harry Potter is bisexual.

2. Hermione had a crush on Bill Weasley when she was 12.

3. Marcus Flint thinks Percy Weasley is a prick with his parents.

4. Fleur Delacour is the most dangerous girl on the planet.

5. Ron Weasley sings on the shower just to bother Harry.

6. Luna Lovegood’s mother (Pandora) is Lucius’ sister.

7. Oliver Wood and Percy Weasley are best friends but always fight.

8. Dean Thomas and Seamus Finnigan sleep in the same bed since 3rd year.

9. George Weasley believes in God.

10. Fred Weasley is gay.

11. Draco Malfoy had a relationship with Theo Nott in 5th year. They’re still best friends.

12. Neville Longbottom hates his body.

13. Ginny Weasley is the best duelist in the school.

14. Harry Potter has social anxiety.

15. Blaise Zabini has excelent grades.

16. Theo Nott has a severe depression.

17. Daphne Greengrass and Padma Patil are friends.

18. Lee Jordan and Fred Weasley are in a relationship.

19. Charlie Weasley is asexual.

20. Draco Malfoy is pansexual and had a crush on Harry when they were 12.

21. Lavander Brown needed to love Ron becuase she didn’t want to come out.

22. Blaise Zabini’s family is from Brazil Draco’s comes from Germany and France. Theo’s is from Hungary. Pansy’s from Kazakhstan and China. And the Greengrass come from Russia.

23. Oliver Wood and Marcus Flint are together since they were 16.

25. Ron Weasley likes to hug Harry.

26. Luna Lovegood knows how to fight but hates it.

27. Harry Potter usually cries in his sleep.

28. Hermione Granger is afraid of being forgotten.

29. Draco Malfoy is a feminist supporter. Which was a big surprise to Hermione, Ginny and Parvati.

30. Bill Weasley is also afraid of spiders

(I edit this, the 29th, because a girl in the comments was absolutely right)

I bet Medusa used to take selfies and send em to people she disliked like surprise you little bitch

✨paciently waiting for a damn vaccine✨

Panic! At The Disco Feat. Fun. - C’mon

omfg I did it I DID IT and I am so proud I am going to cry

I am sorry it’s so freaking long. I am sorry but I am not sorry. I am proud. HA! Didn’t I mention you’re about to get A LOT Percy Jackson? Here it is:D

the end.

Nothing Left To Say - Heroes of Olympus by viria13