Relatable

this crossover is just pure genious

Merthur AU except the crown prince of Camelot is weirdly pro-magic

Poirot still realising he's best friends and in love with an idiot

i wish all my beloved followers and mutuals a very “you find a fic that has the exact premise and characterization you’ve always wanted to see but never had the energy to write yourself and it’s really good and just as long as you want to read”

realistically, Steve's magnetic arm band thing from AoU that brought his shield back to him could never malfunction ever. Because it's Stark tech.

But imagine if it did one day because he tripped on the stairs and all 200 pounds of patriotic muscle landed squarely on it. so it just started yanking every thing even vaguely attracted to magnets right out of its place. imagine.

----

Steve: *reaches for his shield mid mission*

Clint:

Steve:

Clint:

Steve:

Steve: what-

Clint, firmly attached to Steve's arm by his belt: YOU TELL ME

----

Steve: *stretches*

Tony, holding onto the refrigerator for dear life as it barrells down the stairs and right into Steve's face: *SCREECHING*

----

Steve, final-showdowning: five

Villain of the week: do I absolutely have to wait for your shield or can I go-

Steve: FOUR

Villain:

Steve: three

Steve: twO

Villain: I have to pick my daughter from ballet man

Steve: ONE

Steve: BOOM

Villain:

Villain: is that a paperclip-

Steve, crying: shut up

----

Steve: oh my god. Oh my god I'm so sorry I didn't mean to do that I promise oh my fucking god-

Natasha: okay you need to fix that thing

Steve: I PROMISE I WILL

Natasha: aight

Steve: ...

Steve, trying his best to dispel the mortifying awkwardness: so do you always keep an iron knife in your bra or-

Natasha: please stop talking

A version of boys stumbling upon something truly traumatizing in that little book haha

Is this that archive guy yall are obsessed with?

Requirements of being an Avenger:

dramatic to the point where most people literally just cannot fucking stand u

HAVE to involve urself in shit that absolutely doesn’t concern u

Petty

Good aim

mental health issues that allow u to feel no fear at the concept of death or pain

gay

I need to start using these, they are absolutely brilliant

I'm starting a collection

Added the promised second part y’all!