MC: *posted on magicam* Someone really needs to buy me a pregnancy test ASAP.
Deuce: *comments* Why?
MC: This mf— *replies with a photo of Leona*— has been resting his head on my tummy.
Deuce: @MC Okay. But what does he have to do with buying pregnancy test?
MC: @Deuce HE'S PURRING.
Kalim: @MC Lions purr?
Jamil: @Kalim That's the least of your worry here, Kalim. What MC's trying to imply here is that cats can predict if someone's having a baby.
Leona: @MC Who did you do it with?
Malleus: @Leona Me.
Leona: @MC no wonder you stink.
Deuce: @MC So you two were not playing ping-pong in the bed?
Leona: ...
Malleus: ...
Kalim: ...
Jamil: ...
Malleus: @MC What kind of excuse is that?
MC: @Malleus A smart one.
He is too cute for this world
POV: you mentioned you needed help with an underwater mission
What would Thaumo and Nalis do if I just went up to them sniffed their head and said “ew do you not take showers????” and proceed to stare at them with the most deadpan look
Thaumo would stare at you with that stunned confused look he sometimes gets for a minute. He’d then try to pull off a pitiful/pathetic expression & insist that he tried… if it wasn’t good enough maybe you should help him next time he is so obvious it is hurting me
Nalis would be more genuinely stunned and worried & immediately smell himself.
• if there’s a strange smell but it’s not coming from him, Nalis would immediately lead you out of the room, then go back & look for the cause of it.
• if there’s no strange smell he’ll accept your teasing & try to tease you back later in the day.
• there’s a small chance that Nalis got too caught up in his work & didn’t go home to shower or sleep that night. If this is the case he’d be kinda embarrassed, mumble that something work related came up, and sulk off for the rest of the day. The following day he’d show up at your desk, freshly showered & carrying your favorite drink, and in a much better mood again.
Y/n: When it starts out with he’s cute as a joke but now you have 4 kids as well as a 5th on the way, a farm, a Summer house and a small bakery
Trey: *smirks while holding their 4th child* it was a good joke
Y/n: yeah it was
tighnari’s tail is something of a mystery. you’ve never seen it wag or droop, and you assumed that was because tighnari just didn’t feel strong enough emotions to have his tail respond in such a way. the most motion you’ve ever gotten out of it is when he jogs or sprints and it sways from the momentum of his run.
unbeknownst to you, tighnari’s tail wags violently when you’re not looking. it takes all of tighnari’s willpower and energy to stop it from moving when you’re around… it’s been hard keeping it a secret, especially since you’re in tighnari’s company so often.
oh, if only tighnari could tell you why his tail is so happy to see you.
ik you’ve written abt megumi a lot lately but i’m in deep right now lol😭 can i request a childhood friends to lovers with him and the readers met everyone that he knows except Itadori and Nobara? i feel like meeting them with him would be very chaotic and possibly embarrassing for him
childhood friends to lovers >>>
you're probably the only friend he made in grade school, unless you count tsumiki. honestly megumi isn't sure why you insisted on hanging out with him during recess or lunch, seeing his reputation was a little... well, you know how it was.
at first he's probably a little annoyed that you keep insisting on hanging around him, but eventually you're just a constant in his life. he wouldn't admit it, but on days that you stayed home sick or had an appointment during school hours, he was a little bit lonely.
(tsumiki teases him constantly and is always asking about you)
it's not until you admit a secret to him that he decides you probably are his best friend, and will finally admit it out loud. he'll never forget the nervous way you told him that you could see monsters, afraid that he would laugh and make fun of you for such a stupid thing. you're surprised when he sits down with you and tells you all about curses and jujutsu sorcerers and the annoying man that had essentially adopted him to strengthen his abilities in the hopes that one day he could kill those monsters.
(you fall a little in love with him that day in the fifth grade when he tells you that you don't have to be afraid of the monsters bc he'll always be around to scare 'em off)
you remain attached at the hip all through middle school, learning everything about each other during study halls and late nights staying up on the phone together. you talk to him about your cursed technique, and he spends hours with you trying to better understand it's capabilities. neither one of you have any other friends, and if you thought enough about it you'd probably realize you're social rejects. but neither of you care. you had each other and you understood each other, and that was all that really mattered.
the summer before high school, megumi tells you that it was time for him to go to a different school, where he could learn more about curses and follow the path to being a proper sorcerer. you tell him you're happy for him, that you're proud of him, and you know he'll succeed in anything he puts his mind too. he's blushing. you're holding back tears.
you don't want him to go. you couldn't possibly ask him to stay.
and then one day, just before the school year started, a weird man in dark sunglasses and the whitest hair you've ever seen approaches you while you're waiting for your order to be called at your favorite cafe.
he tells you who he is, and that megumi had spent many, many hours talking about you and your abilities. he hands you a brochure, and tells you that he wants you to enroll at jujutsu tech. at first you refuse, you're too afraid of the monsters, and you came from a family of non-curse users. you'd never even told them about your abilities. gojo tells you that he'd already spoken to your parents, and he'd convinced them to let you go to a private school under the guise of your outstanding academic record.
with that, you couldn't really refuse.
megumi is ecstatic when gojo brings you to the school. gojo doesn't think he's ever seen him so happy, and he's surprised when he hugs you tightly, overcome with joy that he didn't have to be apart from his favorite person.
you're both blushing.
in the two weeks before school starts, you help each other unpack and decorate in your little dorms, which are just down the hall from each other. you admit to megumi that you're not sure if this was the right path for you, and he tells you that no matter any anxiety you might have about your new life, he'd be there to help every step of the way.
your heart skips a beat when you look up into his azure eyes, knowing that he meant every word he said. are you supposed to feel this warm and fluttery for your friends? you're not sure, but you enjoy the feeling of butterflies in your stomach, so you don't think too much about it.
you spend almost every waking minute together before school starts. it's the best time of your life. you don't think you've ever been happier. megumi feels the same. he doesn't think he's ever laughed so much in his life spending all this extra time with you that he didn't get as much when you were still growing up.
the night that he's sent to find the cursed object that was sukuna's finger, you had been practicing applying your cursed technique with a teacher back at the school. apparently the blonde man with the spotted tie was the only one patient enough to train with you from the afternoon to well into the evening.
you aren't aware of the events that transpired with one itadori yuji. you had far too much catching up to do. megumi briefly mentions another student joining our class, but he doesn't give away too much information. he'd rather hear about how far you're coming along with your technique, anyways.
a few days later, your mentor Nanami tells you there will be yet another student joining you, a young girl this time. you're excited at the prospect of making new friends.
megumi dreads it.
gojo had already mentioned you (more specifically, he'd said "just wait until you meet (y/n)! I'm sure megumi will be happy to introduce you to his girl!") to the three of them on the last assignment they'd taken together. yuji and nobara had squealed at the prospect of their grouchy classmate having a girl. megumi doesn't know how yet, but he knows he'll have to get gojo back for that one.
it's not until a few days after nobara has joined the team that you finally have some free time away from training, and you suggest to megumi that all four of you should have some bonding time.
"we're classmates. we bond enough" he'd replied gruffly, going back to the book he was reading. but you gave him your best puppy dog eyes and insisted that you must meet them.
"you think they won't like me?" you ask when he continues to shoot the idea down.
megumi huffs, finally dropping the book to his lap and staring blankly at you. you scooted closer to him on his bed.
"you're not embarrassed of me are you, megumi?" you tease, grinning ear to ear.
"course not" he muttered, turning away in hopes that you wouldn't see his blushing face.
you can still see the red tips of his ears, and that feeling of butterflies that you'd been experiencing lately returned. you tease him for his blushing. he gives in with a defeated sigh, throwing his head back against the wall as he agrees to a lunch with your new classmates.
you clap your hands, and lean forward to press your lips to his cheek without thinking. he thinks his heart might burst he could die right there. he gets up and leaves the room hastily under the excuse of finding nobara and yuji.
when the lunch finally rolls around, he contemplates pretending to be sick so he didn't have to go. he couldn't possibly handle yuji and nobara teasing him- which was bound to happen.
but you're so excited, you'd spent all morning with him trying to find the right thing to wear- despite megumi repeatedly telling you that anything was fine, and he was just going to wear his uniform.
"well that's different, you look good in your uniform. it makes me look boxy" you told him, before grabbing a different hanger and heading back into the bathroom to change for the hundredth time.
he feels hot suddenly at the compliment. you continued to fluster him, and it was starting to drive him crazy.
when you emerge in a new outfit, megumi swallows his fear (and maybe his pride too).
"that looks good," he tells you as you look over the outfit in your mirror. "you look, uh, pretty"
you grin, finding it adorable how much he struggled to compliment you. you decide this is the one, and beckon him to come with you to meet your new friends at the gate.
"they're loud," megumi warns. "and... annoying" he adds.
"I don't mind," you shrug, not thinking twice about his cautious words. "I think it'll be good for us to branch out a little"
megumi's hands are closed in tight, clammy fists at his sides.
"i guess" he mumbles. he's never felt so much anxiety in his life before.
(y/n) reaches a hand out to his, gently prodding open his fist and linking her fingers through his. he stops in his tracks, and she turns to look at him, puzzled.
"what's been bothering you?" she asks, worried.
megumi looks anywhere but at her face. all he can think about was how soft the palm of her hand is, and how it seemed to fit perfectly in his. his heart's racing. his mind is buzzing with thoughts of her. but even with her standing in front of him, he can't bring himself to look at her.
"it's stupid"
(y/n) shrugs her shoulders. "so?"
its a simple response, but it seems to do the trick to get herself catapulted over his high, high walls, because he gives in and fucking admits it already.
"they kinda know that i... like you," he says, eyes dropping to hers to watch her reaction closely. "like you like... more than friends like each other"
her mouth forms a little 'o' and her cheeks and quickly turning a rosy shade of pink. she processes the words carefully, before her lips break into a smile, and she squeezes the hand she's holding.
"megumi," she says warmly. "why does that bother you so much? you don't want them to know?"
he sputters out nonsense.
"well I didn't need them going and- and blabbing off to you! I wanted to be the one to tell you first"
(y/n) chuckles, and drags him along with her so they can continue their walk to the gates.
"I already knew," she shrugged casually.
megumi thinks he's going to die.
"but I appreciate you finally telling me," she adds. "and for what it's worth, I like you too"
he wants to cuss her out for making him so anxious over nothing, but he's so elated that he bites his tongue.
(for now, later that night he'll chew you out for not telling him sooner. you'll giggle and kiss his nose and tell him you like watching him squirm. he'll pull you against him and affectionately call you the devil)
and for what it's worth, megumi wasn't wrong. as soon as your new classmates see your joined hands and megumi's blushing face, it is open season. you want to make them calm down for your sweet, shy boy's sake, but you can't help but giggle along while they childishly, relentlessly tease him for having a soft spot.
the soft spot grows larger as he ducks his face into the collar of his shirt. his hand squeezes yours a little tighter.
silently, you tell him,
any anxiety you might have, I'll be here every step of the way. ___
got a lil carried away. i love megumi he makes me soft :')
I’ve always wanted to chug a jar of mayo
Assassin: Any last words?
Darling: Just one.
Darling: BABIES!!
Cyres & Cryas: [appear out of nowhere]
Darling: Play nice with your new chew toy.
MC and Epel: *feeling both embarrassed*
MC: *has accidentally called Trey "Dad"*
Epel: *the same thing with him, has called Vil "Mama"*
Trey: *laughing*
Vil: *clearly not amused by it*
Vil: Do I look like a mother to you? Huh, Epel?
Epel: *mutters* You act like one-
Vil: *frowns*
Trey: How about you, MC? Why did you call me "Dad"?
MC: My dad's kind. And I miss him.
Trey: Aww~. Come here. *gives them a hug*
Epel: Tch. Unfair.
Vil: Did you say something, Epel?
Epel: N-Nothing, sir!
Helios is going to have.. An interesting reaction to the creator being back
What would he do if he heard rumors of an imposter, though?
I'm definitely going to write about his reunion with his beloved god someday <3
Helios is no stranger to people claiming to be his god, he's seen it countless times over the countless eons he's lived. He has better things to do than involve himself with idiot mortals and their issues. He'll just mark it down in his journal as a rumor (since he's not too bothered to confirm the information) that occurred at the time.
Sadly for imposter au, this means he's not going to hunt you down on first mention and figure everything out.
Now, should the rumor persist, he may actually see it as something worth recording. He'd start with wherever they'd turned up first and seek out the truth, which means he's not going to take whatever's said at face value, he'll use his powers to look into the past itself if he has to.
If it's a true imposter, his interest in them will end there. He'll only continue to record their story due to the significance it has to the people of Teyvat, seeing as it's the hot story of the time. Best an objective view remains among the hatred and fearmongering.
If the imposter really is innocent, his interest will tinge with pity for the poor soul who'd been branded for the face they were born with, again, something he'd seen many times in other worlds. A shame that he couldn't feel your aura through the magic. He'll trace their steps through their journey, feeling sorry enough for them that he'll record their legacy. Perhaps, if it is read in the future, it might save another.
Now, Helios can travel anywhere in an instance, though he usually prefers to go on foot. But, with a job to do, he'll teleport at least a few times. Match that with the fact the "imposter" has to hide, he'll eventually catch up.
He has no intention to speak with an ordinary mortal, true imposter or not. But if it's you? Your imposter au is over! yay!
Helios will immediately take you away from Teyvat to the twins' abode (your original home) where you'll be safe, have company, and be able to regain your powers and memories at your leisure. Whatever you want, you'll have.
And you'll have a fancy and comfortable seat to watch Teyvat's slow destruction for their sins.
and if there's an imposter ruling teyvat, he doesn't give a shit about them or their followers & will just write it down as another reason that teyvat sucks and they should just ditch the entire planet.
vigil! mc and ayato get married not bcos they like each other romantically but bcos they just look at each others and think "u would b a good partner /platonic"
.. qpr ayato and vigil mc just seem cute ABDBDB
Hm! Imagine a peaceful world in Teyvat.. this can totally happen!
Married on paper but behind the scenes, they're just goofing around? Checks the vibe lol-