I Think My Biggest Toxic Trait Is Acting Like I Deserve The Nobel Prize For Showing Up To A Class I Literally

I feel like the beach showcases humanity at its finest. There are happy newlyweds taking pictures together. Elderly couples walk hand in hand and watch the sunset. Little kids bubble over with excitement when they see the water for the first time. Everyone is collecting shells. There is pure, uncontainable joy. A sense of peace hangs in the air along with the salt.

And then I look for too long and see the plastic bottle caps bobbing in the water and the beer cans littering the sand.

After all, do they not bleed?

I'm glad we're friends. We're silly, we're awkward. But I'm so glad you're here.

I still think about you, by the way.

How could I not? We grew up together. You can see in our cadence, in our mannerisms. We are permanently intertwined to an extent, whether we we'd like to be or not. You shaped me, and I shaped you.

My father still talks about you too. We were products of our environment. And it was not fair to us. I hope you know that. How they spoke to and about us affected us in ways intangible.

I hope you are well, wherever you may be. I think I will always love you, in my own way.

I hope I’m a better sister to you than she was to me. I love you so much it hurts. I think about you every day. You’re an ass, you can be a pain, and you can be unkind. But I would walk into fire for you. I would do anything to keep you safe. I wish I could do more for you.

I don’t know how you see me, but I’d rather be kind and uncertain, than never be kind at all.

I wish I had infinite cookie

Hey, there’s always next year, right?

Nothing like the horror of realizing your middle school writing is forever on the internet. Anywho. Moving right along.

Thinking about the time I got attacked by crabs at the beach.

Girlhood is turning your cellular hotspot on in the Taco Bell parking lot so your friend can order the Taco Bell Cheez-it Box