Me When I Have A Conversation With My Friend About One Of My Other Friends And My Perspective On The

brah i wore my carabiner today TO CARRY AROUND MY CHILD and my friend goes “are you doing carabiner code. which side is that?” WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME IF IM A TOP OR BOTTOM IN ART CLASS HELP ME 💔

also carabiner reveal

3 weeks clean from self harm who cheered… i think im doing great tbh like i did ALMOST fumble but then i was like “this is not cute lol what am i doing” and then stopped GOSH IM SO COOL

bringing my tamagotchi (her name is priscilla now) to school bc if she dies i have failed as a person

so full of love....ngh ~

hi random ramble abt my mom cuz she occupies my mind at least twice a week unfortunately

i was looking thru my book collection and found a child called “it” by dave pelzer and fuck dude. my mom forced me to read it like a year and a half ago so i would “know what real abuse was” and see “how bad she could REALLY be”. the books an autobiography by dave abt how he was horribly (and i mean horribly. like huge tw for literally everything u can think) abused by his mother. it didnt make me appreciate how my mother treated me. it made me scared that she threatened she could be that way. and it wasn’t just threats. she did do horrible things to me. she broke a plate over my head once. she puts her cigarettes out on me and all sorts of fucked shit you shouldn’t do to someone. ever. i can’t even think abt some of it without going insane so i just push it down and pretend it never happened. her making me read that book was basically the beginning of her being absolutely cruel to me. and she wanted me to be grateful that it wasn’t as bad as dave’s story. that didn’t help, it just made me feel like my experiences or trauma or whatever was invalid because someone always has it worse. like i’ve no reason to complain, at least xyz isn’t happening to me. idk i’m gonna end up re-reading it and feel icky all over again one of these days but yay i hate my mom ♥️

ppl need to be weirder i think. like there’s a lack of weirdness irl and it should stop,, everybody is a carbon copy pls guys individuality is sososo fun give it a try i beg

pulling all nighters for no reason is so fun like bitch the only person available to talk to rn is the moon and you also aren’t doing anything productive wtf is the point?? i mean at least i’ll be up early to get all cunty for school so yay (?)

random ramble idfk

self destruction is an illusion of self control i think. like sure you’re in charge of how bad you get and how you worsen yourself but in the long run it won’t be your decision to make ykwim. it gets out of your hands and the destruction controls you. so instead of self destructing for some semblance of consistency or control over your life you can indulge in self betterment. like do things that make you happy, you can be in control of that too and it’ll be better for you in the long run :P

just remembered i have the south park games on my switch lite,,,ik what im gonna b doing all night 😻😻

AUSHSHSHSHSH CRYING MYSELD TO SLEEP AGAINS WHATS NEW WHATS NEW HAHSHSHDH I LOVE MY THOUGHTS AND EMOTIONS YAYYY