Latest Posts by defemstrish - Page 10

How many sniffs does it take to get to the center of the apple?

Us

yes.

Me: -so after it became apparent that ‘retarded’ had become a term of abuse, educators and psychiatrists switched to other terms like ‘handicapped’ or ‘special needs’ in an attempt to -

George Orwell, whom I’ve dragged forward in time with my arcane powers because I’m lonely and want someone to talk to: You have a telephone in your pocket?  It listens to you all the time?

Me: Never mind about that, the point is, young people now mock each other by sending the wheelchair emoji - that’s a type of electronic heiroglyph - to suggest mental deficiency and shout SPESHUL!!!! while doing offensive imitations of disabled facial expressions and posture.  So any attempt to lexographically make crimethink impossible is pretty much doomed because the meaning of words in everyday conversation can’t be controlled by a dictionary entry, no matter how many Ministry of Truth employees-

Orwell: It reports your location to the telephone company at all times?

And eyes and ears and mouth and nose

call my bitch a golf course the way shes got 9 holes. thats right nine holes. niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine holes, baby!!! nine holes

reblog to give a plushie to the person you reblogged this from

Groundhog day sequel where they realize they're in a time loop because of their Duolingo streak

Click here for more wacky randomness

Right to bear arms? They don't have arms, just 4 legs and a cute lil nose

so ummm welcome to my jar:) lemme show you around! theres some holes poked in the top so i can breathe, theres some leaves to munch on, and ive even got a twig! #mytwig

its the no notes ghoast

I mean I'm aiming to be a horrific form of shapeless mass but I'd take being a hot girl

A new study finds that Apple has some of the highest employee turnover rates of any tech company. Google "apple turnover" for more information.

COUNTER CHOMP

Anyone have any good book recommendations I'm really hungry rn

Purgatory is being in 50 group chats and having the last sent message be yours in all of them

I could fix her

Macbeth moment

Just beat the Ender Dragon on Bedrock Edition (for the achievement, I normally play Java), and now my overworld's skybox is utterly cursed.

Legitimately a cool glitch. I kinda wish it was a feature.

You have killed the most powerful naturally occuring entity in this universe. The sky is perpetually darkened.

Something is terribly wrong.

It is not a bit, it is not a funny, it is not a meme. It is a joke, and it you find them funny you are supposed to laugh not slightly exhale

Why are all modern adaptations of the Greek gods about them messing with mortals, wheres the sitcom that just shows them fucking with each other

Why do the Duolingo staff spend all their time making games and shit instead of inventing new languages

i think ppl will enjoy these so im sharing the experience of studying a tbh creature in the wild.... fascinating creatur.......

They're there for moral support

Baby chameleons help eliminate fruit flies

(via)

I put my hand into a lovely, lovely pile of fluffy looking metal shavings expecting them to be soft and gentle, but no! I am forsaken and backstabbed and now I have cuts on my hand :(

Don't know, didn't ask (ignorance and apathy)

Playing computer games when your not supposed to actually feels great though

is anyone else constantly afraid they’ll be “caught” doing stuff they’re obviously allowed or even supposed to do

I don't want my cellphone to have AI I want it to have 3 days of battery time. I don't want my computer to have AI preinstalled I want it to have seven usb ports and high ram at affordable price. I don't want my games to have AI built levels I want them to be so optimized I could run them on a nokia.

Succumb to the thirst

if you have not drank any water yet today, this is your daily reminder that you are so cute. You're so pretty. Don't let anyone let you think you aren't beautiful. keep sparkling on, superstar

Thyne ass is flat and thyne spells aren't potent

Found your child, $14 and I'll consider letting him go

The fuck did I do to you guys

3 fun romantic questions to ask on a first date

- where's the nearest exit?

- what's your lung volume?

- how many spiders are too many?