Latest Posts by demisexual-dryad - Page 4

“Don’t much know how those finicky rarepairs will do if they’re lonesome oneshots. You just gotta remember to graft them with a long-fic root system. I usually recommend some hurt/comfort to inoculate it too. A little angst is good fertilizer, but if you’re short a pinch, whump I find works just as well. Good ta’hear from ya though. I’ll be sowing some of my classics- the staple crops the fandom market I sell at is sure to like. But I’ve been considering the fantasy and supernatural AU varieties for flavor. We’ll see.”

One of those fandom things that I love is when there’s new characters around and, with the unwavering confidence of an old farmer appraising cattle, fanfic authors take one good look at them, tilt their imaginary hat, and go “Aye. Praise kink, that one. Mighty case of praise kink if I ever saw one.” And everyone else just “aye.”

Unironically though, people should actually engage in play throughout their lives because if we’ve seen anything from other animals, it’s that those who play frequently handle life stresses better than those who don’t.

So why is running around with your friends and getting into lighthearted mischief reserved as a “child-only” activity.

I wanna go play hide n seek in the dark and squeal with surprised joy when my bestie almost tags me when I make my escape :(

It’s almost as sad as realizing after a certain age we stop being adventurous and climbing trees and things, and jumping on things, and being active and those who still are often get reprimanded or judged for it.

(lights a cigarette) nobody even wants to play toys anymore. (puts the cigarette out on a play-dough ashtray) because of work.

If you had a nose that could pick up on delicate chemical trails, I bet you’d be huffing on things too.

God only knows I would. I’d be huffing the hell out of a dark chocolate bar. Fuck yeah. Extend the experience.

animals are quite funny.. you show them a Thing and theyre like "ok i will Sniff this"..

ALSO,

It my birfday :)

Happy new year to yall out there who celebrate! Be safe. Too many drunk accidents happen when people celebrate today.

I feel like this is important to pass around so that we can kick up a stink about it, so yeah. Sorry for all my Ace Attorney peeps, but we also know a conflict of interests when we see one (amirite)

For the person who’s never seen mistletoe irl before, here you are

@thegoldenpuppet

No, that’s usually the one time I am mad about it. I’m patient with everything else but phones and just not checking your blindspots are my driving pet peeves. I’ll live with everything else.

Put it down. You’re driving babes. Phone is off limits, I promise you will live. Please check the lane next to you before you try to merge and run me off the fucking road, (this has happened actually I wish I was joking, worse, it was a service van and the dude didn’t even stop after nearly killing me), I would rather there be a body to find when I die and not an assorted metal chocolate box of mangled pieces of flesh, thanks.

Ideally, I wouldn’t be anywhere near a moving metal death trap when I die. That’d be real nice. But if I do, I want to be buried under a tree.

Me on a daily basis.

Let me melt back into the earth, managing my emotions and all these weird sensations in my chemical saline soup of an existence is hard.

Snorting, cackling, and consoling my itty bitty inner child at this.

Bro…. Just… fucken… let people draw what they want. And draw it well.

The only thing I don’t see on this list is a fucking still-life of fruit. Don’t draw anything, actually, that you find beautiful and wish to commit to memory. Find something that hasn’t (??? Everything is iterations on other things and therefore that point is effectively moot???) been drawn before and draw, I guess.

Let me just fucken reinvent the wheel or somethin idfk

have i ever shown you guys my professor’s DNI list

*caves your skull in with my solid steel warhammer that has words petty vengeance lovingly engraved on the pommel*

forgive and forget? wrong. charged two-handed heavy attack with my greatsword of resentment

Please buy us. Please please please I beg-

Also yes

happy holidays!!!💙

silliness

Yes

The obligatory post

I need a fucking nettypot Jesus Christ THE COLD IS OVER WHY AM I STILL CONGESTED, WHAT THE FUCK.

Can I SLEEP PLEASE?! CAN I PLEASE GET A SLEEP?!

NOTE: *WITHOUT SUFFOCATING*

Happy almost Christmas Day you guyssss

I chose this bed to lie in.

As long as it’s a bed of flowers I think I’m okay with that fate.

I’m sorry what.

WAIT WHY DID IT TAKE ME THIS LONG TO REALZIE THAT MIA FEY'S NAME PUN IS THAT SHES M-I-A (Missing in action)

WHHUUH?!?!

The mutualTM…..

Yknow when you see a post and you're like "oh I have to reblog this for The Mutual" and then you scroll up and you see that the one who reblogged it is The Mutual

Cackling over the fact that they’re fucking fighting over a species of horsetails, this is literally every botanist ever lmfao

i love it when botanists fight in the annotations

guy in 1939, taking his time to line up his typewriter to painstakingly write the family name: its equisetum hyemale!

guy in 1948 scribbling on a slip of paper: no dumbass its equisetum prealtium

guy in 2020 on a sticky note: hey fuckass! its equisetum hyemale, are you smoking crack? are you on fucking crack? update annotation.

Like an old flowering willow tree. Full of wisdom and raw strength, and complimented with delicate whimsy the smooth flow of a mountain creek. Like the blooming orchids that cling tightly with their grasping roots to their lives.

Soft, resilient, and stubborn like the pillow moss that muffles footfalls in the forest. Tender and sweet like new spring blooms, and unknowable as the wind that rips through valleys.

explain your gender in 10 words or less without using boring words like “male”, “female”, “nonbinary”, “masculine”, “feminine” or “androgynous”.

go!

They weren’t even dead, actually, they had a head cold. False alarm everyone.

my autopsy results came back negative There was nothing in there

reblog to tell the person you reblogged this from that what they create is wonderful

Bro

That’s not how this is supposed to work?????

Ahahaha not me looking at other fanfics characterization and sweating while trying to remind my frail ego that I’m doing this because I was bored and it’s fun, and some people actually just happened to like it.

This is the best explanation I could come up with for why it takes me so long to do updates sometimes when, at other times, I’m typing them up like clockwork.

I be like Phoenix wright fr fr

(screw it what's a fun fact about yourself also @ people I'll go first I'm allergic to myself

@escapetheslaughter

@ugly-astral-taurus

@bees-official

@gremlininthedark

@bloodmoon-da-idiot

@multifandomcutie13 )

Sure sure.

Where to start though?

I have an astigmatism that’s been present since I was a very young child, it set me back developmentally in every way, as you can imagine, and they didn’t catch it the first time they did the elementary annuals in like, kindergarten. Because I started bawling during the exam. Full on, Pearl Fey admitting her guilt levels of bawling. Little baby me had the epiphany that I was SUPPOSED to be able to read the little letters, and was very distraught. The test administrators dismissed this as me being scared of the equipment, so they let me go without a proper exam. (New flash, I was not, actually, scared of the machines at all. Because I couldn’t fucking tell what they were.)

My astigmatism continued undiagnosed for like another grade, and I was practically illiterate (because it was actually like a 6 or a 7 in one eye, and then a 5 in opposite direction the other so I’m technically both farsighted and nearsighted, lmfao get owned optometrists) till they did it again and realized it was absolutely atrocious.

That led to me needing to travel for at least an hour to find an optometrist who had equipment that was small enough for a 6-7 year old. The first one we tried couldn’t get the lenses stand low enough to give me a proper prescription, and the seat could t get any higher. (Thank you shitty early 2000’s medicine, not accounting for pediatric cases)

They told me I might be able to get lasik to fix it when I was much older. I went in for a check up at nineteen, and asked about that promising technology, and despite drastic improvements in my astigmatism (at least one of my eyes should qualify assuming it was a treatable type, and I didn’t have an extremely rare kind of astigmatism). They took one look at my chart and looked at me and said “lasik is not an option for you.” So I guess I have some really rare astigmatism that science still can’t effectively treat.

My prescription is still not able to be made into contacts either, so- yknow it’s bad.

My lenses were so thick they’ve actually broken the frames I picked out within a week of having them once.

I must simply be an enigma to medical professionals everywhere.

On the bright side, I’ve always donated my lenses so kids my age at the time with my same issues would at least have glasses.

I also ate grass and a flower once as a child. Yes I know what the flower is now, no, it wouldn’t have done anything at all, but probably don’t go testing if random lawn flowers are edible.

I’ve chewed on pine needles before. They taste like… well, they taste like pine-nuts. But leafy. And cellulose-y

@dolotonglo @fayannah @beaglesbites

(screw it what's a fun fact about yourself also @ people I'll go first I'm allergic to myself

@escapetheslaughter

@ugly-astral-taurus

@bees-official

@gremlininthedark

@bloodmoon-da-idiot

@multifandomcutie13 )

I feel a much greater need to tell you all seeing as I’ve handled both blood meal and bone meal before:

It stinky. The stink will stick to you. You will smell it for days.

Your animals will try to eat it. Don’t let them. It can and will kill them.

speaking of which, i hope all of my mutuals know that you can go on down to the hardware store and just buy a big ol bag of dried blood

@dolotonglo CLOWN TOGETHER STONG

having mutuals who i think are really cool and get like. starstruck when they interact with me. is so weird. like why am i reacting like this. we’re literally both on tumblr

I’d like to add that this is an unfair comparison to make on the simple basis that molecules are made up of the smallest of building blocks, atoms. There are therefore, inevitably going to be some that are really simple, like an O2 molecule.

But organic molecules, as is true for most living and essential to living structures, get fucking complicated and fast. For example. Good ol’ glucose. C6H12O6. There’s already bits hanging off of a hexagonally shaped sugar. Glucose is used and transformed from that, into much, much more complicated structures, as the energy gained from breaking apart multiple glucose molecules can then be used to synthesize ribosomes, which then take pieces of DNA code and that is absurdly long and use even more complicated molecule groups to synthesize advanced proteins and enzymes that help not only cells, but entire tissue, organ, and ultimately the entire organism function.

You remember how much DNA a human has? Now try to think about how many proteins the plant with the largest recorded number of base pairs of alleles has- the current record (which changes every few years or so) has about 160 BILLION. And it’s not even a type of tree! It’s a fern!

That’s a lot of fucking molecules!!!! That’s a lot of little complicated structures!!!

And I don’t mean to make that sound dramatic but it very much is important. Some protein folding disorders can cause some major issues. And that’s just in humans. Never mind other animals too!

biologists will be like this is a very simplified diagram of a mammalian cell

chemists will be like this is a molecule