They Put The Mamsnrbhr Chehfde In De Soder

it's make their tits bounce monday my friends godspeed all and have a great week

my brother and I don't say "mcdonalds" when referring to the fast food chain. we've always said "mcnaldo's", then it became "naldo's". now it's simply "nald". and we always refer to it as a single unit. like "do you want a nald?"

GUYS ITS NEIL DAY

Bad News: Our boss locked the keys inside the building.

Good News: We didn’t have to wait around for a locksmith.

Bad News: My boss finds it very concerning that I know how to pick locks, and tried to unlock my Tragic Backstory™. I was too embarrassed to admit that the reason I learned was because, at thirteen, I figured that was the kind of skill that would impress cute girls.

Good News: A cute girl saw me do it.

Bad News: It was Maggie, and since she’s already seen me fall out of several trees, cry because I saw a fawn that was just too damn small, and knows I can ride a unicycle, she’ll never think I’m cool no matter what I do. It’s too late. She knows.

Not to be controversial or anything but I’d eat that

Ok so Haumea, a dwarf planet beyond Pluto, spins so fast it gets elongated like this. This is just what it looks like. Something deeply unsettles me looking at it. Terrifying.

i’m convinced that the ice age franchise won’t end until the squirrel that always chases after the nut gets an equally hideous girlfriend with Squirrel Tits™ and eyelashes

When will you return to the Forest

When all factories are rubble