People Are Like "if You Put Crabs In A Bucket They Can't Escape Because They Keep Pulling Each Other

so i normally keep my blog sfw but this is to good not to add

My job on the commune is to eat the rats in the grain storehouses. Also I give blowjobs.

i really can’t comprehend what’s happening here this is cursed? i’m not even sure anymore

Oh my god I was just looking to see how much a copy of Hamlet would be through Barnes and Noble and PEOPLE ARE ROLEPLAYING WARRIOR CATS IN THE REVIEWS??????

No male WWI pinups exist yet so my gay ass decided to change that at 1 AM and I ended up looking like a propaganda poster with homoerotic undertones so

WARNING: ANIMAL CRUELTY

Apparently people have been adopting dogs and either killing them themselves or dropping them to a kill shelter (and one even said they were flying them to poor Asian areas to be eaten) under the Twitter hashtag #pitbulldropoff

This is completely cruel and evil and word needs to get around about these demons so everyone knows what these demons are planning to do to dogs once they get ahold of them.

If you know someone or if you yourself is planning to give away a pitty by craigslist soon, DONT and wait for awhile!!!! They act like they’re going to adopt them and act all nice then they get rid of them, don’t be fooled!!

DM me for uncensored names!!!!!!!!

Do you know why Sun Bears look so...weird compared to other bears? Is it the eyes?

it’s not just you, sun bears just look incredibly bizarre when you stack them up against other bears!

pictured: bear

pictured: film extra from the first narnia movie in a hyperreallistic fursuit:

but as always, there are real valid reasons behind mother nature’s stupid horseshit!

the sun bear has bizarrely humanlike limbs because, living in a hot tropical environment, they have no need for the enormous fat reserves of the temperate bears! this makes their bodies a LOT thinner and really screws up their proportions. 

like really, REALLY screws up.

but sun bears do actually have longer front legs than other bears, along with larger claws, longer tongues, and cartoonishly mobile muppet faces.

and for good reason: sun bears are specialized predators of social insects!

the long legs and huge claws let the sun bear rip into beehives and termite mounds alike with wild abandon, while the long tongue and agile face assist the sun bear with getting all slurpy slurpy on the innocent hive insects and their delicious larva who were just going about their normal insect day when the sun bear rolled into town.

“aaaieeee! please, not the children!”

now insects aren’t ALL a sun bear eats, by any means, but they DO form the bulk of the protein in the sun bear’s diet, so they’ve got good reasons to look the way they do!

humans just tend to find the wonky proportions pretty off-putting, and it doesn’t help that many sun bears also have light-colored eyes which humans find incredibly freaky.

NYEGH okay that is pretty awful. 

anyway tldr sun bears look weird because the bear family tried to produce an anteater, and they didn’t do a half-bad job at it!

I want to wake up in the morning to make some toast or something, and I want him to walk up behind me and wrap their arms around my waist, resting their chin on my shoulder, and softly mumbling back the good morning and I love you I give him

I want them to ask me to come back to bed with him, just for a little, and I won't need any convincing to stay with them for as long as we both desire, snuggled as close together as possible, making content little hums as we drift back to sleep, listening to their heart beat

hello tumblr which one of you wants to be my friend that i fall in love with i need a cute bf to give me inspiration for my mlm posts

Why do you like sharks?

now that’s a tag

it’s raining and i want to hold someone. gay thoughts are taking over again. to comfort them as we listen to the thunder and the pouring rain hammer the roof. i want to hold somebody and say sweet things to them. tell them how much they mean to me and how much i love them. i can’t wait to get my cottage and live in it with a boy. off deep in the forest surrounded by creeks and moss and nature.