Testing Out My New Set Of Lockpicks In The Petco Spider Aisle

Biodiversity is bad, actually. I think there should be one big bug that rules everything.

Happy Birthday Cinnamoroll! 🍰💙

Don't forget to sleep on your neck at a weird angle tonight. I love you

if you're a morally dubious man on tv what you're going to want to do is go look at your kids while they're sleeping. then drive your car somewhere

omg hii !!! hi you're home!!! (jerks you off to completion)

Don't tell instagram but I'm getting a headstart on the Muppets 70th Anniversary... many more muppets to come