Frighteningphallus - Sfw Blog Jumpscare

I am a grown ass adult and I still get nausea when I feel like I'm in trouble. They're gonna send me to the principals office and take away my toys for a week. Can you just fucking kill me instead of making me stew in my fucking anxiety

eggs!!

you will see newborn people with not even a single life experience in the replies of tumblr posts

rain dance ☔️

10/10 dad joke

"A guide to cooking with ADHD"

*looks inside*

"Plan all of your meals up to two weeks in advance"

whoever invented beds was a fucking genius im just all cozied up in here like u don't even know how cozy i am

David Lynch is directing dreams now btw

not watching disney plus shows is something only the most dedicated members of the revolutionary vanguard are capable of... you can't reasonably expect an average person to make such a sacrifice