Hello

Slytherin x Hufflepuff

- first of all, the slytherin

- the biggest social outcast ever

- that “end of second semester” mood, but all the time

- and the hufflepuff would be the happiest little jelly bean

- they’re the last people anyone expected to get together

- it takes a little time but eventually ppl are so used to it they would actually die if they ever broke up

- slytherin always acts so tough but they cry around hufflepuff

- and hufflepuff is so protective of their slytherin like an angry little hedgehog

- they’re always together, hufflepuff dragging slytherin’s ass to parties and quidditch matches

- “it’ll be fun!”

- “no”

- “please?” *puppy eyes*

- *giving up* “fuck you”

- pillow fights

- eating ice cream and hufflepuff getting a brain freeze and looking so adorable slytherin can feel them self falling for them

- slytherin dropping things on purpose just so they check out hufflepuff

- and hufflepuff knows it

- “[slytherin], I want to take our relationship to the next level”

- “um..”

- “I want to raise a house plant with you!”

- just the most pure, cute relationship ever that no one understands but everyone is jealous of

The Osiris Club

Summary: You’re the top dancer at the best strip joint Jersey has to offer— The Osiris Club. Sure, it’s grimy as hell, but it’s worth it whenever your favorite client comes in for a good time. 

Word Count: 5.5K 

Warning: Lemon, purely smutographical content, stripping, bumpin’ and grindin’, face sitting, tail fucking, rough sex, a little fluff at the end for good measure. 

A/N: IT’S DONE! Finally! I’m so fucking happy I was able to finish this fic, and just in time for the dvd release! I really hope you guys like it and that I did HB justice. Feedback is gold so don’t forget to drop me a line and reblog, bb’s!

* fanart commissioned by @dixxiemaegraphics​ *

Keep reading

Adventures of of the Batchildren

[y/n]: *on the phone* dad? i need your help! i-

bruce: is the manor on fire?

[y/n]: ...no?

bruce: then it’s not an emergency *hangs up*

tim: well? what did he say? what we do about the portal to hell in the living room?

[y/n]: apparently it’s not an emergency

jason: *being strangled by a demon* HOW THE FUCK IS THIS NOT AN EMERGENCY??

[y/n]: *on the phone* dad? i need your help! i-

bruce: is the manor on fire?

[y/n]: ...no?

bruce: then it’s not an emergency *hangs up*

tim: well? what did he say? what we do about the portal to hell in the living room?

[y/n]: apparently it’s not an emergency

jason: *being strangled by a demon* HOW THE FUCK IS THIS NOT AN EMERGENCY??

reblog this if your blog is a safe space on april fools and won’t have any jumpers, screamers, or anything scary or anxiety inducing

Batdad & Batdaughter Headcanons

•After her adoption, Bruce enrolls Cass in Gotham Academy, in a special ed program

•On weekends though, she goes to Wayne Enterprises with him and hangs out around the office while he works

•They usually leave early for ice cream and donuts

•They’ve also been working their way through the entire Disney animated film catalog

•Cassandra’s favorite so far is The Great Mouse Detective

•Bruce’s is A Goofy Movie

•On a related note, Cassandra’s favorite princess is Mulan and Bruce’s is Jasmine

•Cassandra managed to convince Bruce to wear a holiday themed outfit during December

•She did this by making one for herself, and refusing to leave the cave unless he matched

•She’s going to do the same for Easter

I was only a days old when my dad started watching this show, maybe that’s why my life is so f*cked up

Reblog if this is true by you.

By me…. totally that line had change my life

V FOR VENDETTA (2005) dir. James McTeigue

Avengers Headcannons

Thor’s favorite flavor of pop-tart is cherry.

Clint has various nest throughout the tower vents. Sometimes he even sleeps up there.

Natasha secretly loves Nicki Minaj.

Steve does too.

Bucky is a cat person and loves going to shelters to play with them.

Tony has food hidden all throughout the tower.

Bruce loves watching kids shows. It relaxes him. Sometimes Tony even catches him humming the theme songs.

Tony once rigid J.A.R.V.I.S. to play “Hammer Time” every time Thor walked into a room.

In retaliation, Thor had J.A.R.V.I.S. play “Heartless”.

Steve is a horrible chief, but an amazing baker.

Pietro once tried to run on water. That was the same day they learned he can’t swim.

Wanda loves reality shows.

Thor is amazing at chess.

Sam was a Captain America nerd as a child.

Bruce prefers tea to coffee.

Clint and Natasha have contests to see who can stick as many magnets to Bucky’s arm before getting caught. Natasha holds the record at 37.

~Jaz