Me Coming Home After Another Unsucseful Date To A House Filled With Cats And Crushes On Fictional Characters

when she says she doesn’t send nudes

brat;

summary:  _____ is the newest – and youngest – addition to the Avengers team. Rich, important parents, incredibly smart. Trained in gymnastics, martial arts, acrobatics and more. Got a face that she knows will get her anything she wants; the long lashes, the doe eyes and lips that she just has to pout to get her way. 

She’s a brat – and everyone knows that Steve thinks so because he’s constantly reprimanding her as if she’s the toddler she throws tantrums like.

pairing: steve rogers x reader

genre: fluff, kinda gets steamy but not nsfw

word count: 5.4k

warnings: AGE GAP, reader is 19 – don’t like don’t read my dudes, too many italics and unplanned writing

note: um?? don’t ask me where this came from bc truth be told i opened my bin one day and it was just sitting there :/ ALSO i just realised i didnt have submissions and asks open omfg dumb bitch material much

next part: and again

Keep reading

Don’t scroll past this. Kylie Armstrong was diagnosed with breast cancer and these small dimples were the only signs. She posted the image on Facebook so everyone knows that “that breast cancer is not always a detectable lump.” Here’s how Kylie is doing today.

(If you’re not sure how to do a self breast exam, instructions can be found at BreastCancer.org.)

Request: “Lucius malfoy having a daughter?” -Anon Wasn’t sure if you want a one-shot or an would include, considering I’ve never done one before I decided to do a would include. If you want a one shot contact me and I’ll write one for you. Xx.

-Being named after a star or constellation.

-Lucius wins no father of the year awards.

-He would be quite cold and distant towards both you and Draco.

-But he would show Draco a little bit of affection, him being the Malfoy heir and such.

-You would be closer to Narcissa than Lucius.

-You’d probably call Lucius father because it’s more formal than dad. -Narcissa would probably be mum.

-Draco & you would go back and forth between best friends and worst enemies. -You’d be playing together and you take one of his toys. -This leads to a big argument involving tears and lots of immature name calling. -Eventually Narcissa would break it up and make you two apologise. -Not actually forgiving each other -Glaring at each other when your mum isn’t looking. -This could go on for weeks. -Eventually one of you cave (most likely Draco) and you’d give the other a flower from the garden, kinda like a white flag.

-Being friends with Dobby.

-Constantly trying to sneak him clothes.

-Which gets you a scolding from your father.

-Being nervous on the train to Hogwarts, worrying if you were going to be a Slytherin or not.

-Lucius would be disappointed if you were a Ravenclaw, mad if you were a Hufflepuff and probably lose his mind if you were a Gryffindor.

-He would give a courteous congratulations if you were a Slytherin.

-If you were in Slytherin you’d hang around Draco & his friends but not really liking Crabbe or Goyle.

-In the other houses, you’d probably be a loner because of your family name, but still hanging out with Draco and his friends every so often.

-Not being as rude as Draco.

-The main reason Draco was so rude was to please your father, eventually you gave up (especially if being sorted in another house).

-Also, since you spent a lot of time with your mum who had more of an open mind, your prejudice would be non-existent or not as strong.

-Less likely to join a quidditch team, even if you do love it.

-Partially because it was Draco’s thing and you didn’t want to steal his thunder and because you wouldn’t get along with your team mates as well.

-Rebelling.

-After giving up on trying to gain your fathers attention, you’d start to rebel for fun.

-If you were a Gryffindor, you’d be the Malfoy version of Sirius Black.

-Your room at home would be covered with red & gold with posters stuck on the wall of muggle things

-Wearing less dignified clothes.

-Nothing particularly slutty but more casual, so where your family were all wearing suits, you wear jeans and a top with a leather or denim jacket.

-If you were a Gryffindor, you’d probably dye your hair.

-It was a symbol of you being a Malfoy and it reminded you of what you had to be every time you looked at your reflection.

-Not dying it a natural colour, it’d be something fun to really drive your father crazy.

-Eventually, Lucius would disown you if you did all this.

-Becoming friendly with Hermione & Harry.

-Hermione would realise you weren’t like your brother, you didn’t judge people on Blood status and would NEVER use the ’m’ word.

-Her first talking to you in the library.

-You would be studying for the upcoming potions test and not understanding anything.

-Eventually, she ask if you needed help.

-Reluctantly, saying yes.

-After an hour or so, you would understand majority of it

-Going to her if you need help with homework and such.

-Harry & Ron calling her crazy for becoming friends with the enemies sister.

-After a lot of convincing, she’d get them to ease up on you.

-The first time you really spoke to Harry was the year of Umbridge.

-You would be crying in some hidden corner of the school when he stumbled across you, crying over your scared hand.

-He’d comfort you.

-And you’d apologise about everything on Draco behalf.

-Telling Harry about how Draco was when the two of you were younger.

-The next time you saw Hermione at the library, she invited you to join Dumbledore’s Army.

-Most people not trusting you, think you’d rat them out.

-Having trouble conjuring a Patronis.

-You haven’t exactly had the most joyous life.

-Eventually, you would conjure one.

-Using the memory of you, your mum and Draco cooking when you were little.

-Mrs Weasley inviting you over for Christmas.

-It would’ve been after Harry sending a letter to Sirius about you.

-Sirius would causally mention it when Molly was around and she decided to have you over.

-Mrs Weasley would fawn over you, saying you were too skinny and needed more food.

-Helping her in the kitchen as much as you can.

-Her dismissing you but you were just as stubborn.

-You ended up peeling potatoes manually and listening Mrs Wesley going on about when her children were little.

-Loving her stories.

-After much insisting on her part, you’d start calling Mrs Weasley, Molly.

-Most of the family being cautious around you.

-Until you comment on the twins pranks that they had pulled.

-Them being surprised when they found out you loved pranks.

-Especially when they hear about a prank you had pulled on Draco.

-Bonding with them as they tell you about their store.

-Winning over Ginny when you compliment her on hexing your brother.

-“I love him but he can be a total pain in the arse, I don’t know how you deal with so many of them.”

-Looking at your portrait on the Black family wall with horror.

-Laughing at Draco’s.

-Having long conversations with Sirius complaining about your families.

-You talked more than he did and you didn’t push him sensing he was uncomfortable with talking about it.

-Sirius noticing the parallels between your lives.

-Inviting you to stay with him during the summer.

-You wanting to agree but declining because you didn’t want to leave Draco.

-Most of the Order became protective over you.

-Even Ron starting to warm up to you.

-Going with them to the Ministry to save Sirius.

-He was like an uncle to you and you weren’t going to sit back and doing nothing.

-Lucius being surprised to see you there.

-Low key trying to avoid cursing you and not letting any of the other Death Eaters hurt you.

-You were still his daughter after all, even if you weren’t close.

-A part of him was ashamed of you for fighting for the other side.

Using the crutiatis curse on Bellatrix before she hurts Sirius.

-Not feeling guilty about it cause he was more family to you then he was.

-Officially being disowned after that.

-You and Harry going to live with Sirius after his name was cleared.

-Living in a house in the country where you could see the stars

-Draco refusing to talk to you, claiming you had betrayed him.

-Narcissa writing short letters every so often to check up on you.

-Helping the twins with their joke shop.

-Worrying about Draco the next year.

-Draco, still mad at you, bullies you a lot at the beginning of the year.

-Crying because of it.

-Him feeling bad after he sees you sobbing in a corridor.

-Slytherins now hate you.

-Or act like they do.

-Spending most of the time with Hermione.

-Bonding with Ron over not being invited to the Slug Club.

-Not caring as much as he does but at least he’s talking to you.

-Every so often breaking down about being disowned.

-Sirius being very supportive through letters.

-Punching Harry in the face after he curses Draco.

-“You even think about hurting my brother again, Voldemort will be the least of your problems.”

-Not leaving Draco’s side while he’s in the hospital wing.

-You just sit there for hours clutching his hand.

-Occasionally glaring at professors or Madame Pomfrey when they try to make you leave.

-Eventually they give up.

-Draco waking up to see you asleep on his beside in an incredibly uncomfortable position, your hands still holding onto his.

-Him waking you up when he tries to leave.

-Forcing him to tell you what’s happening.

-Draco telling you everything, while the two of you hold back tears.

- The death eaters getting in anyway.

-Persuading the Order to help Draco and you mum.

-Sirius helping you convincing them because Draco reminds him of Regulus.

-Going on missions for the Order the next year.

-You and Draco fighting together at the Battle of Hogwarts.

-Coming face to face with Bellatrix.

-She tried to kill you for being a traitor and you barely deflecting her spells.

-Lucius killing her before she could.

-After all you are his little girl.

-Even if he’s not good at showing it, Lucius loves you.

-Him giving you a really tight hug.

-You cry and beg for him to flee.

-He Does.

A/N- I got a little out of hand. This is about 4 & ½ pages long and almost 2 000 words. I could’ve kept writing but I decided to end it there. Please send in more would include requests. They’re fun. Xx

Newest fictional crush

Borra from Maleficent: Misstress of Evil

I heard THE SONG in class.

Shoutout to all the bitches who read fics where actors or characters are your dad cause your real one's a piece of shit!

It's me... i'm bitches.

Avengers Headcannons

Tony has kissed everyone on the team at least once.

Steve loves frilly coffee drinks. Especially pumpkin spice.

Pietro has a habit of sleeping in really odd positions, in random places. They once found him passed out on top of the Avengers jet.

Wanda and Vision have telepathic conversation. It freaks everyone out because they will just stare at each other for hours.

Steve and J.A.R.V.I.S. are best friends.

Natasha teaches female empowerment at local high schools.

Whenever the team goes on missions to foreign countries, they always bring back a souvenir for Fury.

It started as a joke, but now it’s a tradition.

Fury will never admit it, but he keeps all of them.

Steve has only been drunk once. It was after Thor brought him some Asgardian mead. That night they found out Steve is a very bad singer.

Tony recorded the whole thing.

Bruce has a companion dog to help keep him calm. She lives in the tower and her name is Veronica Jr.

Clint teaches self defense classes in his free time.

Steve loves volunteering at children’s hospitals.  He goes so often he knows almost all of the nurses and doctors by name.

Even though Thor can’t get drunk from earth alcohols, he still likes drinking them for the flavor.

Steve is the same way.

~Jaz

Coloring Book Adventures

Summary: As a way to stay abstinent, you color in coloring books to distract you when you feel sexual urges. That’s until your father’s gardener comes to play.

Pairing: Bucky x Black!Reader 18+

WC: 6.9K (i got sooo CARRIED AWAY I AM SORRY)

Warnings: PURE SMUT, innocence kink (is that a thing?), this might get nasty so watch out, loss of virginity, Daddy kink, mentions of extremely religious parents and religion in general, masturbation using a hair brush handle, unprotected sex (just use condoms guys, thanks)

A/N: If you like it all I ask is that you leave verbal feedback, thank yooou

You have always been sheltered. Your parents always wanted to hide the real world from you and fed you lies to scare you away from things so you didn’t do them. They’d tell you things like sex would kill you if you didn’t do it with the man you were married to, or your fingers would turn blue and fall off if you tried to please yourself. It sounded absurd but you believed it. You were homeschooled so you never got a real education or made real friendships. You didn’t know why they didn’t let you out like other kids but that’s how you grew up.

That’s how you got here, still in your pink and lilac room coloring in your coloring book while laying on your stomach. Your mother forced it upon you when you were 16. She told you to color in it whenever you felt those tingles in your private parts, that way you would keep your hands busy so you wouldn’t touch yourself. You got those tingles quite a bit, that’s why there were two stacks of coloring books in the corner of your room that you finished cover to cover. You rubbed your legs together as your colored and dropped your head a little against the book and sighed as the friction started to feel good. You were 20 and had no idea what you were doing but it felt really good. Your heart beat started to pound in your ears as you moved your hips back and forth, you started to feel an intense feeling and stopped yourself, heavily breathing in and out through your nose. You realized what you were doing and scolded yourself as you continued to color.

“Y/N!,” you heard your father’s voice on the other side of the door with a knock.

“Come in!,” You hummed. He came in and saw you coloring and shook his head, knowing what that meant. He hated seeing you coloring because that meant you were feeling “urges to sin”.

“Come downstairs. The gardener is coming today and I want you to meet him so you can tell him what you want in your corner of the garden,”

You squealed enthusiastically and hopped up out of bed. Long forgetting your urges. Your lilac dress bouncing with you and your dad told you to not do that around the gardener, “Yes, sir,” you nodded. He led you down stairs and brought you outside with your mother so you could decide and be dead set on what part of the garden you wanted. You chose the the corner in the far back that was hidden by a small wall of shrubs.

“Hellooo, Mr. and Mrs. Y/L/N? I’m Bucky the Gardener,” he called from the other side of the gate.

Keep reading

—𝓸𝓬𝓬𝓾𝓹𝓪𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷: 𝓫𝓻𝓪𝓽 ;

_____ is the newest – and youngest – addition to the Avengers team. Rich, important parents, incredibly smart. Trained in gymnastics, martial arts, acrobatics and more. Got a face that she knows will get her anything she wants; the long lashes, the doe eyes and lips that she just has to pout to get her way. She’s a brat – and everyone knows that Steve thinks so because he’s constantly reprimanding her as if she’s the toddler she throws tantrums like.

ONGOING

♕ = smut 

part 1: brat

part 2: and again

part 3: hot girl summer ♕ 

part 4: dreams do come true (in new orleans)

part 5: a degree of fancy

part 6: thicker than water

part 7: silver lining

DRABBLES

lesson 1 ♕

pass the salt

eat the rich ♕

midnight snack ♕

bubblegum b**** ♕

sober thoughts

the witching hour ♕

the boss

the relapse

the stealth suit 

sex pollen ♕

reverse sex pollen ♕

period pains

honorary stark

“Would you go back?”

an attempt was made

one of his french girls

“let’s get married.”

the one about the piercing

the one about the dollar-bill knife

the dress

joining forces with scott lang

pre-serum steve

“please talk to me.”

meet the exes

pushing your luck

accidental mind-reading

the one where steve shaves his beard

recklessness

not taking no for an answer

midnight ride

spotify playlist

headcanons/ asks/ photosets/ miscellaneous