“I Am Aware That This Request Is Fundamentally Selfish. I Can Offer No Justification For It, No Argument

Play me a memory--A sigma fic

Summary: Sigma hopes to transcribe the universe’s melody, in hopes of awakening his true powers, but gets more than he bargains for when the government facility he has escaped from has found him once again.

Read it here, or find it on AO3

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Sigma sits in front of a piano. Not the Bechstein studio grand piano that used to sit in his apartment in The Hague but a cheap, upright Yamaha instead. He knows it is old just from the touch, the damp thud of the keys and the slow responsiveness of the pedals. Most aggravating of all is the tuning, the way the notes sound off to his ears. He does not have perfect pitch, and he never will, but if he concentrates hard enough, he can feel the shape of a note. Middle C is a yellow circle, and if he rises it up to a D, it transforms into an orange triangle. He hypothesizes that his abilities over gravity have given him a sensitivity to the electromagnetic waves that make up sound, but he cannot test this without rigorous testing. The beauty of these powers is that there are so many potential experiments and possibilities.

It’s been a long time since he’s played. Or at least, he thinks it’s been a long time. The last time he had touched a piano was one week before he went up to the international space station that caused his accident, but time is no longer linear and memories no longer make sense and he cannot say how many years have already passed since then. Has it been three years or longer? He cannot say.

He very much prefers listening to music rather than playing it, but he does not have that luxury. Talon is many things but it is not a musically inclined organization. His previous request for an parabolic microphone must have fallen upon flat ears for the next day he gets a regular microphone, the kind used for karaoke parties. It didn’t even have the batteries in it. So it is a miracle of sorts that his request for a piano got through. It was probably salvaged from a nearby dump, but it is still in working order, and he is grateful for whatever gifts Talon bestow upon him.

His body suddenly stiffens as he feels a shift in the air. He turns his head slowly, eyes wide as he finds himself staring back into his face. Only it’s not his face but another version of him, decked out in the orange jumpsuit that government facility crafted specifically for him. His copy smirks sinisterly.

 “Gravity is like sanity. All you need is a little push.”

“W-w-what?”

 “They called the geniuses of old insane back in their times.”

He is frozen in fear, staring into a face that is his but not his. The other approaches him and places his hands on his shoulders. He can feel the energy being sapped away from his body, his twisted mirror image growing larger, impossibly larger than him. As the energy leaves his body, he can feel his mind clearing. As his mind clears, he can see this twisted alter ego for what it truly is. It is sin, the devil in disguise. And behind that disguise is the black hole that destroyed his career and his mind. And it laughs. It laughs so viciously.

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Thinking of a decidedly non-fixit Arcane AU where Silco and Vander both live, but now have to navigate negotiations with Piltover for the nation of Zaun, and the fallout in their families.

Eight years ago, when Marcus spirited Vi away to rot in prison, unbeknownst to anyone he managed to take a just-barely-alive Vander, too. Vander remains Marcus’ best-kept secret, but after Silco and Jinx are arrested, he’s yanked from the bowels of Stillwater and reinstalled as leader of the newly declared nation of Zaun.

Reeling from his change of circumstance and the paths his family has taken during his imprisonment, Vander must now navigate the aftermath of the very different plans Vi and Silco have laid for an independent Zaun. 

But after five months of negotiations, all Zaunite prisoners are released from Piltovan prisons, and Vander and Vi must confront their siblings, and grapple with the base violence necessary for change. Takes place at the end of an alternate Act III.

Vander survived like Vi did, but Vi does not realize this at the time. She spends her entire time in Stillwater believing he died of his injuries.

Shimmer did allow him to survive, but he remains Vander rather than Warwick the robot-zombie-werewolf/living embodiment of the Hound of the Underground he will almost certainly be in canon.

The plot of Arcane proceeds pretty much normally. Caitlyn does not initially learn of Vander, as he wasn’t involved in the incident with Silco’s henchman. Few Piltovans know about Vander, and prior to Jayce and Mel’s initiative, even fewer care enough about Zaun to bother with him. After Caitlyn and Vi address the Council, Marcus’ dealings are discovered, and the idea of Zaunite independence is floated, some rusty gears start turning, but Jayce isn’t privy to this and still attempts to negotiate with Silco.

Silco still spirals when offered independence at the price of his daughter, and still monologues to Vander[‘s statue] about it. However, word of the terms, and Silco’s refusal of them, somehow gets out to the other Chembarons, and then to Zaun at large.

Fortunately, this manages to head off Jinx’s tea party of horrors.

Unfortunately, this leads to a (very understandably) enraged mob of Zaunites willing to drag both father and daughter to the bridge of Piltover for the price of one, and/or stone them in the streets.

Silco has precious few moments to assure Jinx he’d never forsake her. When the mob comes for them, he tells her to go and tries to cover her escape, but Jinx refuses to be separated from him. The mob washes over them.

Jinx, as she always does, fights like a woman possessed. Silco may be rusty, but he is and will always be a son of Zaun, and he is scrappy. When a man cuts off one of Jinx’s braids and starts tearing at her clothes, Silco stabs him to death with his own knife. But when the first stone is thrown, at the foot of the Bridge, all he can do is throw his scrawny body over hers in a desperate attempt to shield her.

Meanwhile, Cassandra Kirammen has just seen fit to reveal Vander’s survival to Caitlyn, who races to tell Vi (who is in Zaun hunting Sevika).

Vi is nearly overcome with joy at his survival and the prospect of rebuilding Zaun with a stable adult, and almost as pleased when they hear an angry mob has come for Silco. However, her joy turns to horror when she realizes Powder is with him, and Jinx is just as much a target of the mob as Silco is.

Vi races over the rooftops in the mob’s wake trying to reach her sister. She’s horrified to see a dead man, stabbed and trampled and still clutching a bright blue braid.

The mob surrounds Silco and Jinx at the Bridge, hurling stones. They are dispersed by a warning shot from Cassandra Kiramman, backed by a squad of Enforcers. The first thing Silco sees, when he’s able to lift his head, is a Piltovan gun pointed at him and his daughter.

Vi arrives at the rooftops overlooking the scene to hear Cassandra Kiramman tell them that Violet was right, their own people did turn on them. The anguish in Jinx’s cry as she buries her face in Silco’s chest and he tries to comfort her will haunt Vi for years. For a moment, Silco sees Vi above them, and the accusation and rage on his face as he holds his battered, traumatized daughter is chilling.

Cassandra then drops the bombshell than not only has Vander survived, he’s now poised to become the new leader of Zaun (provided cooperation with the Council). Cue Silco breakdown.

Vi watches the Enforcers arrest Silco and Jinx as Zaun processes this news. Having all but traded places with her sister after all these years, her reunion with Vander takes a bittersweet cast as she, Vander, and Ekko set about rebuilding Zaun and dismantling Silco’s Shimmer empire.

The chembarons put up a fight, but not as much as they might’ve, at least openly. Sevika managed to avoid the mob and she quickly emerges as one of the voices Vander knows he’ll have to negotiate with. Ekko and especially Vi are not happy with this, but the fact remains that Zaun is sorely lacking in any remaining competent leadership who’s been in the Lanes for the past 8 years and is even remotely trusted by the people.

Meanwhile, Silco and Jinx have had near-simultaneous breakdowns with the reveal that Vander is alive, Vi “betrayed” them to Piltover, and both of them are now working with Topside for the independence Silco’s (allegedly) been working for for the past 8 years. Convinced more than ever that everyone else betrays them, they become, if possible, even more codependent.

They are separated during intake (Jinx’s other braid is cut so she's not lopsided), and their frantic reunion in the canteen attracts attention, and some crude suggestions that Jinx should find herself a younger man. Silco, disgusted, says she’s his daughter.

Silco has failed to stand up to Piltover, failed to keep power in Zaun, and now apparently failed to kill Vander. His single-minded devotion to Jinx is all that stands between him and a complete breakdown, but his power to protect his child is severely limited in prison; in Zaun he was a king, here he’s just a sump-rat. And he’s fading.

Like the mutant fish that prowl the waters, Silco is adapted to the chemicals and pollutants in Zaun, and when cut off from the Shimmer, like a fish out of water, he gets very sick, very quickly.

Silco and Jinx see each other at meals and outdoor hour (no effort is made to separate men and women), but otherwise prisoners are left to rot. Neither engage with any other prisoners, even their henchmen. But Silco gets weaker, and as the months turn colder, he becomes too sick to leave his cell. When he doesn’t show at the canteen, Jinx takes it upon herself to go to him. She locates his cell and sneaks in at night (with some lockpicking help from Mylo’s ghost?). She can evade the guards, but she tells Silco they’re more concerned about keeping prisoners in Stillwater than what they do in there. Silco is more concerned about the implications of who might be able to get into his teenage daughter’s cell.

Silco is not doing well. Guards bring food to his cell, but don’t bother to see if he eats it. He can’t keep it down, and he’s becoming too weak to try. He tries to give it to Jinx, telling her not to waste it. It’s the only thing he can do for her.

He’s dying, and despite his attempts to reassure Jinx she’ll be alright, he’s terrified at the thought leaving her alone. Jinx is determined to keep him alive though.

She makes it to his cell every night, rumors be damned. When be becomes too weak to eat, she feeds him, doing everything she can to keep him fed, keep him warm, keep him breathing through the night. Fluid fills his lungs, leaving him in a state of constant drowning. He lapses into delirium, raving about Marcus and Vander and Vi, about Piltover and Shimmer and the nation of Zaun. Eventually, he can barely keep down water, and all Jinx can do for him is draw sharks on the walls and ceiling of his cell, to guard him when he’s trapped in nightmares he can’t wake from (she gets it.)

After five months of negotiations (~December?), Vander and Vi secure the release of all Zaunite prisoners from Piltovan prisons. What to do with them presents a challenge, as Zaun has no criminal justice system and next-to-no legitimate economy. Many of the prisoners are petty criminals by Piltovan standards, but ordinary citizens caught by Topside in Zaun. Then there are prisoners like Silco and Jinx, considered personae non gratae even (or especially) in Zaun. No one knows what to do with them, but it’s agreed they should face Zaunite justice.

Piltover knows that “Zaunite justice” could involve another mob, but they don’t care enough to object. Vi and Vander also know this, and care very much.

Vi is still in denial that Powder/Jinx is hated as much or more than Silco.

The prisoner transfer comes with little warning in the bowels of Stillwater, as the guards round up all the “sump-rat” prisoners one morning and send them to the Bridge, where the leaders of Zaun have assembled.

Vi is overcome with relief when she sees Powder among the released prisoners, but Jinx can’t find Silco.

He’s at the end of the crowd. As per the agreement, Piltover will release prisoners at the bridge, but he must cross it himself, and he’s barely able to walk. When he tries he immediately slips on the icy ground and doesn’t get up. Guards are laughing, Jinx is becoming frantic, and Sevika senses danger. 

Lying face-up on the bridge, Silco looks up at the flag of the new nation of Zaun and almost gives in. And then he hears Jinx screaming his name.

Silco can’t walk and Jinx can’t carry him. But she won’t allow anyone near, and Vander and Vi just agitate her more. Sevika finally steps forward to carry him to a van that will take him and Jinx back to Zaun.

Sevika takes a moment to assess their condition before making the executive decision to drug Jinx unconscious and carry Silco into the Last Drop

 Vander takes one look at him and calls for a doctor. When it becomes clear that Singed expects him to die and is a little too enthusiastic at the prospect of dissecting his eye, Caitlyn offers her father’s services as a doctor and escorts him to Zaun.

Vi stays at Powder’s bedside. When Jinx wakes asking for Silco, Vi tries to assure her she’ll never have to see him again, only for Jinx to punch her in the face and rush to Silco’s bedside calling for her father.

The first thing she sees is Vander standing over him, and she wrenches him away with strength that shouldn’t be possible. When Vander comes face to face with his youngest daughter after 8 years he can’t help but flinch.

Powder was his kindest of his children, the sweetest, gentlest, always trying to please. Jinx looks at him with rage and fear and accusation and betrayal and hate. She looks at him with Silco’s eyes, the last time he saw him.

Then she has him on the ground, too fast for him to react, going for his knife as Vi and Sevika try to separate them. Jinx and Vi briefly square off to defend their fathers, before Silco stirs.

Tobias Kiramman arrives to find the leader of Zaun battered and brooding, Caitlyn comforting a tearful Vi (who’s sporting a black eye), and Silco and Jinx reuniting for the first time in an independent Zaun. Both are weeping. It would be touching, if they weren’t who they were.

He recognizes Singed as a disgraced former doctor turned serial killer, and is concerned by the Zaunites’ unsurprised reactions. He’s the only doctor in Zaun, and the good ones wouldn’t come to the Undercity if they had any choice.

He’s also disturbed by the condition Silco’s in. It should have been obvious he was ill, but it’s clear he received no medical care in prison.

When Vander slashed his face open, chemicals in the water leached into the wound, formed crystals in his flesh, in the back of his eye. His eye’s turned black, the flesh of his cheek underneath caved in and rotted away. What was in that water? Singed would love to find out! Some phenol maybe. Shimmer kept its spread at bay, but now…

He’s so weak Tobias warns Vander he may not live, but Vander tells him he will, because Silco’s a survivor, for better or worse.

Silco and Jinx’s move back in the Last Drop goes about as well as Sevika expects. They put Jinx in Powder’s old room, leading to disturbing, violent meltdowns that Vi and Vander are unprepared to deal with, while Silco’s health crashes several times in one night.

Vander concedes that it’s unsustainable and, on Sevika’s suggestion, eventually puts Jinx with Silco over Vi’s objections, as he’s the only one who can halfway calm her during meltdowns and she's the only one with experience with his healthcare.

Jinx has become Silco’s sole motivation to go on, and their dynamics subtly reverse. Clinginess and insecurity are traits readily associated with Jinx, but not obviously with Silco. Jinx has always been dependent on Silco, but in Stillwater and after she cared for him. This wasn’t to pump up her feelings of importance, or even a child’s desperation to avoid losing another parental figure; Jinx sincerely cared for her father out of concern. When he tells her she saved his life, she tells him children can take care of parents when they grow up. 

The threat to their relationship was never Vander. Vi is another story, but Silco is Jinx’s father, not him.

Vander is unwilling to ask anyone else to care for Silco, and whatever Jinx can’t do Vander does himself. Silco alternates between vicious cruelty and such obvious physical and mental agony it’s impossible to fake, and he can swing unpredictably from one to another. He doesn’t need to accuse Vander; he knows.

Silco’s necessarily feeling overwhelmed and emotional after learning of Vander’s survival and Zaun gaining independence. He’d finally understood and and even forgiven Vander when he believed him to be dead, but the reality of confronting him alive is very different.

Vander: Sweeps in to gain independence and claim leadership of Zaun after 8 years in solitary confinement 🙌

Silco: half-carried out by his teenage daughter after 5 months in prison

Yeah, Silco doesn’t like that.

On one night, Vander freezes outside Silco’s door, listening to his brother curse Marcus and his deception, writhing and crying in pain from the wounds Vander gave him, as Jinx tries to soothe him by describing how she killed Marcus in graphic detail and offering to kill his 5-year old daughter. He curses Vander too, and Vander flinches when he hears Powder offer to kill him as well, if it would make him feel better. But even wracked with pain, Silco realizes how dangerous this could be and that he needs to be the adult in this situation. He declines, and tells Jinx to be absolutely sure he’s lucid before carrying out any hit jobs he issues. 

On another night, Vander finds Silco passed out covered in vomit and carries him to the bathroom to clean him up; as he puts him in the tub Silco comes to and panics at the combination of Vander and water, struggling violently enough to injure Vander and himself. Vander in frustration finally asks if he would burden Jinx with all of his care, and Silco begrudgingly surrenders. When Vander makes him admit he hasn’t kept any food down all day, he brings him new food for to eat and watch him eat it. Silco tries to tell him not to waste it and give it to Jinx, but Vander snaps at him that it’s not a waste.

They begin to speak, a little, about their children. What to do with Jinx? Redeem her as Powder or prosecute her as Jinx? Silco credits Jinx’s theft of the Hex gem and threat to Piltover for Zaunite independence, the base violence necessary for change. She’s perfect, he tells Vander, a true daughter of Zaun. She’s done what we never could.

Vander’s learned a lot about the things Jinx has done, what Powder’s turned into. He can’t tell if Silco is truly that blind to her faults or if he’s in denial. When he presses Silco about what role he played in making Jinx, Silco riles, but not at the accusation he corrupted her. He genuinely believes that becoming Jinx was the only way to heal Powder from the pain of betrayal, something he knows well.

He tells Vander that after Vander tried to kill him, he returned to the mines, through paths even Vander never knew. He stumbled for days (though he admits that he might have been hallucinating, as there are things in the mines that can make you “see things”) before he came to an underground clearing filled with impossible flowers sustained by a mysterious glowing fluid. He collapsed there, and it was there Singed found him. Singed asked him if he wanted to live, and Silco tells Vander he wanted revenge.

Vander’s heard enough and turns to go, but Silco becomes more agitated, snarling at Vander not to turn away from him, to look at him. But to Vander’s surprise, her doesn’t seem motivated by anger or possessiveness or a disagreement in ideology; he’s terrified for what will happen to Jinx if they try to force her to become Powder again, reduced to begging Vander not to do that to her.

When news comes that Piltover has officially recognized the nation of Zaun, most of the surviving adults of the rebellion generation are overcome with emotion at the news. Silco breaks down as Jinx comforts him and Vi finds Vander weeping it the Last Drop and goes to him. Caitlyn spies Sevika crying quietly in a back room and slips away before she sees.

Silco and Vander have achieved everything they once wanted with the nation of Zaun, but they cannot share this victory together, not now. The truth they are unwilling to concede is that Zaun’s independence took both Silco and Jinx’s “base violence necessary for change,” and Vander and Vi’s diplomacy and compromise with Piltover. They need to be united, as they once were, as they always planned to be, if they are to move forward. But they won’t. They can’t. Not anymore.

Vander was never meant to be the diplomat. Silco was supposed to be the clever one, the negotiator, who wove his way through a trail of paperwork and legalese, who’d gain the respect of the Pilties once Vander was done cowing them from the Undercity. It takes more than a revolution to build a nation. Vander needs his brother now.

But that’s just it, isn’t it? Silco’s there, he’s right there, down the hall, on the other side of the door! But his brother is gone.

On top of that, wanting Silco dead is one of the few things that unite most in Zaun (and Vi and Ekko aren’t inclined to deny them). Vander insists he will stand trial once he’s strong enough to stand, but many would prefer a quicker end to justice. Fear of Jinx is all that stands between Silco and a very easy death.

Sevika: You’re welcome to try. It’s just a matter of how many of you Jinx will take with her.

Vander is between a rock in a very hard place. One night, Silco wakes to Vander crying silently over him, but gives no indication that he’s awake. Silco and Jinx are monsters, but they are monsters of Vander’s own making. It is not possible for Vander to pursue justice for Zaun without betraying his brother and his daughter, again.

Silco gradually becomes aware that a significant factor in independence negotiations was the return of the Hextech gem to Piltover, and it hasn’t been returned yet, because Vander and Vi can’t find it in the Undercity. When Jinx confides that she hid it before the mob took her and knows its location, for the first time since Stillwater, Silco has some hope.

 For better or worse, Silco is back in the game. He starts to pull himself together. His hair’s grown out, hanging unevenly to his jaw, clipped back with Jinx’s sparkly barrettes. He's lost so much weight his dress shirts no longer fit, so he wears them wrapped around, held in place with a belt that needed a new hole worked into it, and what look like pinstriped pajama bottoms. Tobias Kiramman hears one Zaunite comment that “at least he’s dressing normally now.”

At one point he also watches in horror as Silco, barely strong enough to walk, lights up a cigarette. When Dr. Kiramman protests, citing his lungs, Silco coolly asks Jinx to open a window, allowing a haze of greenish smog to enter. As Tobias chokes and coughs, the two Zaunites remain impassive, and three glowing eyes stare at him through the haze.

Sevika also pays Silco a visit. She denies being a traitor, as she worked for Zaun, not Silco, but tells him she wasn’t the one who exposed his deal with Piltover to the Chembarons and to Zaun (That was Renni, and I honestly can’t blame her). She also tells him he looks like shit, but he looks more like himself than he has in years.

Silco’s plan is to use knowledge of the Hex gem as a bargaining chip. Not to avoid prosecution, he knows that’s impossible, but his goal is to get a sentence that’s survivable rather than being left to rot in Stillwater, with a guard bribable enough to allow Jinx visits (and potentially explore other means of leverage).

He also seeks to shield Jinx from prosecution, taking all blame for her crimes however implausible. Everyone in Zaun knows it’s a lie, but Silco’s hoping that apathy will save them rather than ignorance. 

Ironically enough, his and Vi’s goals are completely aligned, had they ever considered coordinating their assertions that Jinx was blameless and acting solely on Silco’s orders.

However, all his plans fall to nothing when, on trial by the leaders of Piltover and Zaun, Jinx lives up to her name, threatening them with Hextech weaponry in a bid to protect Silco. Sevika later finds him crumpled in a corner, helpless and out of options to save his daughter or himself.

(This family is so doomed by the narrative).

I cannot properly express my love for the fact that Rincewind is a wizard not because he does magic or is particularly intelligent, which he doesn’t and isn’t, but because that’s who he knows he is, it’s an integral part of himself despite his not fitting any wizardly criteria other than wearing a hat with WIZZARD written on it, and all the other wizards think this is fair and don’t question it.

Do you think Snape hate has increased since we found out he was poor?

I think there’s a number of reasons, but yes, I think it’s a possibility.  We can quickly compare and contrast how Draco and Snape are perceived by fandom, or even Regulus and Snape.  I suspect that the poverty that the Snape family were steeped in is too difficult for some readers to wholly grasp, whereas perhaps it is far easier to admire and aspire towards the riches and decadence of the Blacks and the Malfoys.  

Maybe it’s also easier for some modern readers to imagine the psychological impact of not agreeing with the politics of your parents than it is to imagine the undercurrent of domestic violence and living in a destitute environment in a dilapidated house.  Additionally, there are uncomfortable messages for some from Snape - this dirty, unloved, dishevelled child is as powerful and as capable as any other wizard, and given the opportunity, he flourishes.  Depending on your class, you may read Snape’s success as a powerful message of triumph over adversity - or perhaps, a dangerous message about competition from the underclass.  

Still, I suspect the real issue is generational - and not necessarily generational from Harry starting at Hogwarts in 1991 and us discussing this almost 30 years later, but generational from JK.  I’ve spoken a lot previously about how her depiction is of teachers from the mid 70s put into a book set in the early 90s and how that doesn’t wholly translate to the kid of the late 10s.  

With that in mind, I think her notion of a love story is also mired in history.  For someone of JK’s age when she started writing, unrequited love was seen in positive terms - it wasn’t meant to be creepy.  Love is a huge theme throughout the series, and the idea that Snape - who had walked down this horribly dark path and was outwardly a mean and nasty and spiteful man - would completely change his ideology and allegiance due to his unrequited love for Lily was supposed to have been indicative of the power of love.

But we read Potter now with modern eyes, and unrequited love has not aged particularly well.  It seems rare that people genuinely ‘quietly love from afar’ - and instead, fandom insists on applying traits to the character which don’t exist in the text.  For instance, there’s no indication of Snape being a stalker or a creep, there’s no indication that he wanted a sexual relationship with Lily, there’s no indication that he bothered her or harassed her.  He isn’t a ‘nice guy’ or an ‘incel’ - but some readers can’t find the trope that they’re expecting, so they apply others to the series, even if they don’t quite fit.

So, I think the author and the readership are in conflict.  The author wrote a tale of genuine unrequited love, and the readers are trying to view it through modern frameworks, and they draw incorrect conclusions about the character’s motives.

I suspect this is exacerbated by the readership not ageing with the series.  Everyone who read Potter whilst it was being published had to wait for the next book to be written, but these days, they’re binge-read.  I think that lack of distance between each book (and the subsequent lack of maturity, because you’re reading the next one within a week, and not waiting three years, so you can’t have matured further) means that many struggle to separate Snape from being a cipher for their mean teacher at school to becoming the secret hero that he is.

I think that’s my real conclusion.  The problem is that this is an old text which is being read as if it is modern - and that leads to a clash between reader expectation and authorial intent.

How to Greet a New Pal

(Part 10)

First

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Part 7

Part 8

Part 9

Part 11 Welcome to Underfell… UF Dogaressa is my new fav. I also learned that the face shape everyone gives Grillby is a lie. His head is round in the game. I’ve been lied to for years.

DO NOT POST THIS INSTAGRAM, OR ANYWHERE ELSE! YOU DO NOT EVER HAVE PERMISSION!

Dubbing must ask permission, specifically if you monetize.

A Case for Reed Richards’ Asexuality: Aphobia and Amatonormativity in Marvel and its Fandom

I have been thinking quite a lot about how fandom’s rampant aphobia factors into Reed hate, probably because I recently discovered that a Marvel artist had vilified Reed in the past over on Twitter by claiming that he is an asshole who thinks of his wife as “just a friend,” as though it somehow would make his love for her less valuable or important if he did. So I’m going to talk about the ways in which Reed has been coded as ace within Fantastic Four canon, and how he is troublingly framed as strange, abnormal, and Other both by official FF canon and fandom over this ace-coding. To be clear, Reed has never been explicitly called ace in canon, but there are moments where it’s been made abundantly clear that he does not experience sexual attraction and that he is fairly ambivalent about sex. 

It does bear pointing out that Reed DOES love his wife romantically—if you’ve ever read FF comics, that much is fairly obvious:

I love you, Susan. You bring light…and life…and joy…and meaning to my days. Now and forever.

Marvel Knights 4 #21

But the fact that he doesn’t behave like a stereotypical heterosexual man—in possession of a high libido, sexually aggressive, obsessed with sex, constantly sexualizing and hitting on and competing over women the way Ben and Johnny do, etc.—means that, in many people’s eyes, Reed’s love for his wife is somehow lacking and not really love. Personally, I think it factors quite a lot into people’s arguments that Reed is “abusive” for “neglecting” his wife, which he simply is and does not do in canon. The implication is that it’s because of his lack of sexual attraction and low sex drive – Reed “owes” Sue sex because he’s her husband, the thinking goes, and his failure to provide it consistently means that he is failing in his husbandly duties. The aphobic notion that aces are abusive to their allo partners because they “withhold” sex is, unfortunately, old and familiar, and it is coercive and, worst of all, encourages rape. Unfortunately, it’s not an interpretation of Reed’s behavior that hasn’t been encouraged in official FF media – take, for instance, this exchange:

Just think of the technological marvels that ancient spaceport might hold, darling!

[sighs] I can see a bikini doesn’t stand a chance with you.

Fantastic Four: The Animated Series: Ep 2x12: The Sentry Sinister

Discussion of aphobia below the cut.

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‘By looking far out into space, we are also looking far back into time, back toward the horizon of the universe.’ - Siebren De Kuiper

HP META MASTERLISTS

Hey! Here is a big master list of all my favorite Harry Potter character analyses and Metas! I had so many saved and I didn’t know how I should organize them so I figured I put them in a post. I’ll be adding more when I find new metas and will be posting them here.

I DID NOT write these! Please do yourself a favor and check out some of the wonderful and intelligent writers of these metas as they deserve all the praise for their hard and impressive work!

If anyone of the writers for whatever reason wants me to remove their meta from this list just tell me and it will be done!  

Some of these may be contradictory to each other but that is because I like to hear other interpretations. These may not line up exactly with your view of the characters (not all of them line up with mine) but please try to be respectful.

*Almost all of these are from Tumblr except one from reddit and one from a outside blog.

Enjoy!

LUPIN META:

Remus Lupin: in depth analysis

Gentleman Monster: How Remus’s Marginalization and Comparative Privilege Made Who He Is

The Marauders Map scene in POA: Verbal Fencing Between Snape and Lupin

Lupin and his use of pauses and “ers”

Neither Likes Not Dislikes Severus…

Remus And His Use of Language + Sirius’ Dark Humor

Fanon vs. Canon: Remus Lupin Edition (reddit)

Lupin as a manipulator

Lupin is a gold standard for for the male manipulator trope

Lupin and how he presents in front of others

Remus would rather categorize himself with his oppressor than validate his own experiences.

Lupin and how he views himself

Prisoner of Azkaban: When Hostility Meets Passive Aggression

Remus’ “unmistakable signs of trying to live among wizards”

Remus lupin: Repentance vs Regret

Lupin lying to himself and others

Remus did a lot of “growing up” during the lost years

“And I haven’t changed…”

Remus Lupin: ENFJ

If Lupin and Tonks had survived the battle?

Lupin and the boggart lesson

Nearly Always Right: Remus and Harry

Remus with his own special brand of comforting logic

Remus Lupin at his most dangerous

Remus Lupin is so detached from things

Fanon vs Canon: “Remus is always sweet and kindly.”

Fanon vs Canon: “Remus is always sweet and kindly.” pt. 2

Snape and Lupin parallels

Harry/Remus dynamic

Lupin isn’t the middle ground in Mrs Weasley vs Sirius argument

Remus and what his friendships represent

Power game that goes on between Lupin and Snape in POA

SIRIUS META

Shame of My Flesh: Reading into Sirius’ Thoughts on Crouch Family

The Hogwarts Express scene in Prince’s Tale: A Sirius and Snape analysis

Sirius and Molly Argument in OOTP

Someone Like A Parent: The Beginning of Bond in POA

Snape, Sirius, and revenge Arrested Development – Sirius, Snape, Obsessions and Blind Spots

Why Sirius hated Snape so much

Padfoot and Prongs: an analysis of the friendship

Sirius and Walburga: the passive-aggressive Sticking Charm

Sirius and Walburga’s similarities

Regulus and Sirius’s relationship

Sirius and Lily

Sirius and Orion Black

Sirius Black and Complex trauma

Grimmauld Place: Azkaban by a different name

The worse thing Sirius Black has ever done || The ‘Prank’

Sirius Black, Mental Health and Masculinity

Part one

Part two

Part three

Part four

Padfoot and the Liminal Space

Sirius was not an immature man -child

Sirius is both emotionally and academically intelligent

Sirius’ sense of humor

Sirius Black the Loner

Sirius Black and Acts of Service

Part one: Sirius and the shadow of being a Black.

Part two: Sirius Black: the victim of the system he was born to rule

Sirius and Snape both want to be part of a world that they will never truly understand.

Fanon vs canon: James and Sirius are either very saintly or very evil.” pt 2

Sirius’s views on Death-Eaters: The world isn’t split into good people and Death-eaters.

James, Sirius and Snape: privilege and intelligence

Sirius and Regulus’s relationship is Kreacher

Sirius is not as explosive as he is often characterized.

JAMES META

James and Sirius had the best friendship in the story

“the marauders’ is essentially just three people wanting to be james’ best friend but only one of them actually achieving it”

Too Deep for the Healing

How does growing up with elderly parents affect James’s personality?

“the marauders’ is essentially just three people wanting to be james’ best friend but only one of them actually achieving it”

Ashes thoughts on James

Fanon vs canon: James became a reformed character for Lily’s sake

Fanon vs canon: James and Sirius are either very saintly or very evil.” pt 1

James Didn’t Suspect Remus - First War edition

James inner sense of nobility prevents him from killing

PETER META

Peter Pettigrew is emotionally intelligent and uses it in a strategic manner.

Peter is a Beautiful Scum Bag

Peter Pettigrew and the Werewolf Incident (Not as Much of a Key Event for Him)

Peter and Remus

MARAUDER META

Reading Marauders Dynamics in SWM

J/S vs F/G: different types of troublemakers

The rifts that made it possible for the Marauders to fall apart were evident even as far back as Hogwarts.

An Analysis of the Snape’s Worst Memory Pensieve scene

The marauders recklessness

The marauders individual relationships

Fallout of the “prank”

LILY META

Lily’s weakness is her fondness for being the exception

Lily and Altruism

Lily’s cold anger

Lily and her friendships

Slughorn’s favorite student

“Friendzoned”

Lily Evans is attracted to James Potter in Snape’s Worst Memory.

Interpretation of Lily’s blush

Lily and internalized misogyny

Fanon vs canon: Lily is either very saintly or very evil.”

Lily intended to break off her friendship with Severus before SWM

Harry’s relationship to the Prince as a blueprint for Lily’s friendship with Snape

Lily never hated Petunia

What’s Up with Petunia’s Resentment of Lily?

Lily is blind to the flaws of people she admires/loves unless it explodes in her face.

Lily’s feelings for Snape are more complex than fandom gives them credit for.

“Lily in nature”

SNAPE META

Snape and Class

Lily and Sev

How Dumbledore’s death speaks to Snape’s moral evolution

Feminist reading of lily/James/snape

James and Snape were rivals? Nah.

Snape was really traumatized by SWM

Snape being female coded

The extremely dysfunctional friendship of Snape and Lily

Trolly problem: Snape and Lupin

Snape: class and power

Lily Potter’s Son

Two up, two down

Snape and the Order confrontation of the Dursley’s

Severus Snape or the Importance of Body Language

Snape and the prince nickname

Snape was not upset over the lost of the order of merlin

Snape had to practice being a person

Spinner’s End (white hound)

Snape as a “bad victim”

Snape and queer coding

Dumbledoor, Snape and the werewolf incident.

Snape was his own man

a matter of perspective

Snape, Sirius, and revenge

Snape doesn’t want revenge

Snape and lily’s shared spirit

Snape’s use of language

Why does Spinners End matter?

HERMIONE META

Hermione and Ron don’t blindly trust harry

Hermione “character growth” with SPEW

Hermione wouldn’t like fiction

Harry and Hermione understand each other

Hermione can be very ruthless

Hermione and internalized misogyny

Book Hermione

Cool Hermione Things: Magic Under Pressure

Hermione IS soft

Hermione was born a leader and diplomat

Harry is in awe of Hermione

Mr. and Mrs. Wilkins: A Closer Look into Hermione’s Modification of Her Parents’ Memories

Fanon vs Canon: “Hermione is always sweet and kindly.”

HARRY META

Deconstructing Harry: The boy we meet in Philosopher’s Stone to the man in Deathly Hallows

Harry And Personal Conflict: A Meta On Evolving Dynamic With Ron and Hermione

The Resurrection Stone Scene: Culmination Of Harry’s Emotional Arc

The Resurrection Stone Scene: Culmination Of Harry’s Emotional Arc

The Dementors and Harry’s Complex grief

Harry’s intuitive, empathy related approach to morality

Harry identified with and reluctantly admired Snape even before ‘The Prince’s Tale’

Harry and Hermione in The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore

Harry and The Dursleys: Examining His Response to his Abusers

The Mirthless Laugh: Sirius and Harry

Harry and intellectual curiosity

The Potters and class

Harry-Hermione Friendship

On Harry and the adults in his life

Harry and masculinity

Harry’s quirks

RON META

Ron and the Horcrux: An Alternate Reading

Ron isn’t a strategist, he’s the heart

GOLDEN TRIO META

Gender Dynamics in the Trio, Part One: Gender and Subordination

WEASLEY META

“Lucky you”

Percy with F&G and Bill

Percy fell through a big crack

Is Ginny Upset That None of Her Family Noticed Her Disappearances/Serious Health Problems/Posession in her First Year? (If She is, They Still Don’t Seem to Notice)

Molly Weasley is a Misogynist

That Time Fleur Exploded at Molly and Became a Member of the Family

The Weasleys Aren’t Evil, Or Anything, But They’re Not Saints Either

Ginny, the diary, and her family’s reaction

Does gender plays a role in Harry and Ginny’s respective interactions with Voldemort?

Percy and Arthur were close without actually knowing each other’s true selves,

Ginny and writing failures

fred and george could be weirdly brutal towards ron

Percy, Fred, and George

Weasley siblings reacting to the expectations put upon them

Weasley analysis

OTHER CHARACTERS META

Bellatrix: Mental health and the feminist lens

Dumbledore as a Mentor

“all draco wanted was to be loved” debunked

Walburga Black: the madwoman in the attic

General Thoughts on the Black Family

Fanon vs canon: “The Evans family treated young Snape very warmly.”

Albus Dumbledore Has Done Great, Generous, Things for People (Though He Also Uses These People as Pawns Later)

Albus Dumbledore is not only respected and feared, but also loved

Trevor and Neville’s Boggart

Wandlore: Remus and Lily

Neville’s Boggart

The Abandoned Boy And His Problematic Fathers: Snape with Voldemort & Dumbledore

The Blacks are a family in decline

WORLD BUILDING

Hogwarts School Uniform

Why the Wizarding World Didn’t Oppose Voldemort

The Blitz Paved the Road to Voldemort

Hogwarts Houses by Muffin

How Old is the Bias Against Slytherin?

No, Really, the Hogwarts Houses Are Awful

House Elves Are Slaves

A History of Magic Brought to You By The Carnivorous Muffin

Light and Dark Magic is Stupid: Here’s Why

The Wizarding World Lacks a Key Understanding of Magic

The Wizarding World and Its Profound Ignorance of Muggles

The Slug Club is Actually Very Necessary

The Order of the Phoenix is a Useless Joke

MISC. META

Harry Potter as a colonial fantasy

Death as one of HP’s themes

The “not like other girls” syndrome in the Harry Potter books.

HP series being ‘ethically mean spirited’

Marauders era and the 70s aesthetic?  

JKR and chirstianity

Harry potter series and how american readers can understand classism a little better

Slytherin and Eton: A Primer on the British School System.

JKR’s absolutist way of seeing the world: gryffindor and slytherin

I just had a GALAXY brain idea, Rincewind says that his mother ran away before he was born, right, which ISN’T POSSIBLE

… if she’s cis. 

PLEASE watch this. i love chaotic sisters best dynamic in the world