Her Eyes Were The Sickly Green Of The Sky Before A Tornado, And To His Horror He Discovered She Could

It was just a simple “slay the dragon, rescue the princess” quest. But the knight can’t help but feel werid that each city he leaves always seems to have a dragon sighting the very next day, and a lady with draconic features always seeming to follow him in the crowd from the corner of his eye.

the most zuko thing to ever happen

Temples are built for gods. Knowing this a farmer builds a small temple to see what kind of god turns up.

A long day’s light

comic doodles of @calchexxis ‘s fics!

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A hitman who advertises his services the way a commission artist does

Anybody else got that Evergiven sized writers block

Something about FNAF 3 and Fazbear Frights taking place in 2023 in our current social media landscape

If I were to make a Metroid or Metroid-adjacent game, one thing I would definitely do is bring back the feature from Super Metroid where you're able to toggle on and off certain upgrades. Tired of frozen enemies getting underfoot? Turn off ice beam. Tired of jumps making a silly noise? Turn off screw attack. And so on.

But I would frame it as Samus going into her suit computer in-universe to mess with things, so the player can turn on and off MUCH more than the upgrades. You can mess around with anything Samus would be able to, which opens up a number of esoeteric gameplay options that can be advantageous in certain situations, as well as a truly limitless number of ways to just screw yourself over on purpose. For instance, you can choose to remove the suit at any point. This kills you if you're in a superheated or vacuum area, and makes things impossibly challenging if you're not, as you can't jump well, take fall damage, and get decimated by local wildlife (but does allow you to fit through gaps without the morph ball). You can also choose to turn off the suit's life support, which causes the screen to blur and blacken and shrink over the course of a minute and a half, at which point you suffocate and die. This has no gameplay utility, and can be halted at any point by turning the life support back on, which causes her to audibly gasp. You can also turn off the in-game HUD, if you want a cleaner screen. You can engage the safety on your arm cannon, preventing it from being used. You can turn off the suit's musculoskeletal system, which causes Samus to collapse under the weight and can do nothing but shoot and slowly crawl. This gives you stealth advantage against any enemy that uses electroperception, such as platypuses. You can also have the suit dispense ration paste, which does nothing but cause Samus to emit a brief slurping noise. You can turn off the suit's radio identifier, which does nothing but prevent you from entering your ship (it has no idea who you are.) You can engage an armor lock that freezes you in place; if an enemy touches you, you tip over. You can turn off the suit's computer which blanks the menu and softlocks the game.

And finally you can activate self-destruct, KILLING YOU INSTANTLY, along with anything else in the room with you. Notably, this works on the final boss as well, which will trigger a cutscene for a "good" ending. However, instead of rolling credits afterwards, it will just send you back to the last save point, like the jackass you are.