I Think About If He Thinks About How Much Smaller She Was When He Looks At Me, I Know Her Gut Didnt Hang

Just ate lunch (292cal) and I didn’t eat that much and I’m actually so stuffed I feel like I’m gonna puke. Yk what that means?? My stomachs finally shrinking ! 🤩🤩🤩

Flip flopping between ED thought processes is so frustrating. I could fast for days no issue but the moment food hits my lips I loose all control and I can’t stop. I feel like I’ll always be a fat ugly monster. I hate it so much. I hate myself so much. Why can’t I stop? All I want is to stop, I want to be pretty, I want to be skinny, I want to wear cute clothes!

Might fuck around, put on a flowy dress and start twirling while Stevie Nick's entire discography plays softly in the background.

Honestly my goals are more aethetic than number based. If I need to be under my goal weight to have a flat stomach, tiny waist and arms, and a thigh gap so be it ya kno?

I feel like my scale isn’t accurate enough. I know I’m heavier than that. Every time I weigh at the drs I’m heavier. How will I know if I’m ever actually at my ugw? I fucking hate it

want to snack?

here’s a list of things to do instead :)

low intensity activities

read (helps if it’s on of your favorites that sucks you right in) !!

watch youtube/netflix/tiktok

stretch

sing

practice an instrument

knit or crochet

headphones on and lip sync in the mirror to music

headphones on and daydream to music

go on a slow and casual nature walk

paint or draw

journal

chat with a friend

sew or embroider something

shower

do your nails

pluck your eyebrows

give yourself a facial massage

online shop (or window shop) !!

daydream about your celebrity crush ;) fr tho

bubble bath

practice doing your makeup

practice doing your hair

figure out your color season (ive tried to do this so many times and still don’t know, good luck)

meditate

clean your makeup brushes

brush your teeth and floss

scroll on pinterest or tumblr :))

nap (one of my personal favs) !!

high intensity activities

headphones on and dance in the mirror

learn a dance routine

walk or jog

clean old clothes out of your closet

reorganize your room

yoga or pilates

weight training

go thrifting

do laundry

try your clothes on or try on different outfit ideas you’ve had

exfoliate and shave (this is def high intensity idc what you say) :3

go for a hike

the realization this brought me made me cry actual tears.. [not mine]

i hate how much i dont hate food