Oh Honey... Did You Forget? You're In Control. Don't You Want To See The Number Drop? Don't You Want

Did anyone else go through a random recovery where your mental health just improved in general which allowed you to kick your ED mentality to the curb and see through body dysmorphia but then gained a decent amount of weight making you unhappy with your body and reverting back to ED habits even though you don’t have the same obsession anymore and now feel like you don’t really have an ED anymore because it’s not that bad you just have disordered eating and also kinda wish your mental health would just fuck up so you could at least go back to being a real Anorexic/bulimic ect. Because boy this feels shit and confusing and I really do feel like I’m faking it now.

literally hunger does such weird stuff to a person because I literally hate the chicken we have for dinner all the time so usually it's easy to skip it but lately I'm like "dammm that sounds so good rn" because it's been so long since I've had meat 💀

Day 1: Stats

CW: 34 kg / 75 lbs

H: 153 cm / 5 ft

BMI: 14.5

☆⋆｡𖦹 °‧ ⋆౨ৎ˚ ⟡˖ ࣪

why do I have 0 self control now

Manifesting self-control

All I need is -5kg

Is it too much to ask for??

I have a very exciting new discovery! Dance workouts! It might seem silly but they're actually making working out and burning calories fun and less torturous. I can burn 200 calories in less than an hour. They work much better than jogging in place. So very proud of that one, although... I did go over my 500 kcal limit today by a landslide, but I burned off all the excess!

P.S. Do you guys have any tips for any upcoming events? I have a party coming up tomorrow and a celebration the next day and I have not prepared at all. Should I try to adjust my kcals or just not focus on the food at all/avoid them?

Should I break my fast...? I'm a day and a half into it but I'm starting to feel really weak and have no energy at all. I can barely walk a few distances before my feet feel like their about to give in and feel like I'll drop if I don't stop for a break.

Why 3at when I could read fan fiction instead?

Day 3: A picture of your th!nsp!rat!0n. What features do you like about this person?

Unfortunately, I cannot find the picture of my th!nspø. However, I remember that I liked how far apart their lëgs/th!ghs were. Their frame looked so petite and just were honestly so th!n. It was a wort of candid shot so you really couldn't see much. It was a academic/school sort of themed inspiration.