Sorry Can’t Hangout Tonight I Have A Garden In Another Dimension To Tend To

You want me to fall in love? The thing that killed Martin K. Blackwood?

Happy New Year! 🎉

Vaporwave Neil with one of my favorite quotes from the books 🦊

OK but The Vast has the most comedic potential out of any entity imo. Like other fears are like “uhhh my cousin got replaced” and “there’s Evil Mold in my fridge” or whatever but the vast could just say “one day I was on a trampoline with my brother and he just didn’t come down” and it’s perfectly in character and just works.

I just realized that Jean is what happens when the “my parents sold me to the mafia to pay off their debts” is written on ao3 instead of wattpad

if time travel existed i'd try to get banned from specific historical events. not because i want to be a jackass but because i think it'd be funny to have something like "not allowed within 10 years of the jfk assassination" on my public record.

Tim Drake types all his important WE reports in comic sans as a joke but nobody has the balls to say anything about it and suddenly it’s been three years and everyone at WE uses comic sans now

PLEASE no ur so right

i bet in conferences he also looks like he's taking down notes but when you look at it it's just like

✨ Meeting Notes ✨

✨ #1. what the fuck ✨

the end of men in black is so funny. your boss trains you for two days on interplanetary relations then says "ok I think you can take it from here. I'm wiping my own memory so don't bother calling me if you have any questions"

"can you behave" yes, if I wanted to, but this is so much funnier

I love the reveal in Over the Garden Wall that the story isn't actually set in the past but that Wirt has been going through this whole adventure in a shitty last minute Halloween costume he threw together and only half intended for other people to see him wearing. Imagine travelling through a creepy magical forest that seems to be stuck in the 1800s for several days while being hunted by an evil shadowy tree man who wants your soul but you're wearing an old power ranger mask from 2008 and a cape that's just a beach towel. That's pretty much what Wirt's outfit is equivalent to and that's such a big mood

Why not spell pants like “pance.” Just a little thought I had