Then You Never Really Knew Me At All

luca's parents, grandma and massimo watching alberto and him being fruity in the train station :

Luca’s first day at school 😿

April Road Trip, featuring MM April who only had a learner’s permit, two very loud teens, 1987 the mom, and 2003 who is holding on to dear life 💗

LUCA x ALBERTO 3AM THOUGHTS PART 2

[Part 1] [Part 2]

If you watch carefully throughout the film, you can see how much of a simp Alberto is for Luca. Strangely enough, a subtle instance of his furious simping happens at the beginning of the movie when they first meet.

…Actually, it happens BEFORE THEY EVEN MEET.

Let me explain. (…but read Part 1 first!)

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I present to you, The Diver Suit, which I argue is part of Alberto’s theatrical master plan to win Luca’s heart, or at least get Luca to follow him to the island.

We continue… BOOM, the grand entrance in a diver suit. Not even FIVE SECONDS after Luca inspects the phonograph. This seems suspiciously calculated for a few reasons.

First, thats some crazy timing… almost as if Alberto was waiting for Luca to approach and surprise him from the back, essentially directing him to swim even closer to the island, rather than to swim back to his goatfish herd.

Second, Alberto is a fishboy so he can swim! He doesn’t need to use the suit to dive down and grab his things. He even takes off the suit once he’s done surprising Luca.

Third, the only useful thing from the diver getup is the helmet that is used like a bucket to carry Alberto’s human treasures up to his island. So why not just take the helmet without the suit? Because my boy loves the ✨d r a m a✨

Fourth, if you think the purpose of his suit was because he just wanted to scare Luca (or other sea monsters) away from his loot, why did he give Luca his harpoon? Heck, why did he even bother chasing and cornering Luca, then getting all up in his face? He wants the attention!

“Here, hold this.”

Fifth, why did he steal Luca’s shepherd’s crook right after? It’s not even an interesting or odd “human” artifact! It’s like a little schoolboy intentionally taking his crush’s stuff so they’re forced to interact.

Lastly, why did he have to hook Luca onto the island? I say it’s because he saw a cute boy and told himself, “Yes, you are mine now. I will make you love me.”

Alberto calmly returns Luca’s crook with a little smirky pout on his face, but Luca didn’t actually ask for it back.

I argue that Alberto returns it without a fuss because he knows he finally got his foot in the door. His beloved finally acknowledges his existence.

Mission accomplished.

Alberto totally wanted to act cool in front of his crush and lure him into his island. Pop his “doing the change” cherry so Luca wouldn’t forget him and keep coming back for more. Alberto is a sly one. He knew exactly what he was doing.

Thanks for reading my obsessive ramblings.

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This was my personal headcanon that was apparently confirmed to be canon— that is, the part where Alberto set up the items and wanted Luca to follow him was confirmed to be canon. Unfortunately, I can’t find the original post from the director.

The simping is speculation, but you can bet your tail I am writing fanfic about this. Stay tuned 😙

[I think I’ve only seen one comic that sort of references this idea, so if you guys have seen or heard any more, I would love to bless my eyes with that content.]

Theories aside, even if it was chance that Alberto happened to show up at the right place at the right time wearing a diver suit with the objects having fallen perfectly into alignment... I have even more tangible and clear examples of his simp behavior.

I’ll write more about this (with examples!) once I get some much-needed sleep.

Me every day since the 4th

Swordfighter peach my beloved