sometimes it's not even enemies to lovers. sometimes you get handed the leash of a snarling, barking dog against your will and realize with dawning horror that you are now responsible for teaching it not to bite
When I was “I want him” about a male character im not saying I wanna fuck him. I want him like a spoiled little girl wants a pony, I want to him so I can put him on my shelf for safekeeping, I want him like a good hearty stew on a winter’s evening, I want to put him in a jar and shake it.
Soap gets one of those fucking art kits that every child who enjoyed art got that we can't use.
Ghost gets his favorite Sargent.
Just to clarify, that positive pregnancy test in Gaz's box is his. I'm going to impregnate that man.
Price gets a day off.
Alex is certainly a wife guy. He gets a shirt that shows how much he loves his wife and burn cream because he blew himself up for his wife once, and he likely will do it again.
König gets 30 seconds of straight pepper spray directly into his eyes. If he closes his eyes, I will hold them open and resume.
Roach gets a speak and spell. Feel like he would use it to cause chaos during briefings.
Nikolai would get a copy of Cold Chains for Old Men Magazine and a gold chain.
Farah gets to CRANK THAT MFING HOG
Laswell gets a couples massage with her wife
Graves gets bass pro shop opossum (Russell 2)
Makarov gets coal, though, it kind of backfires because he goes on a rant about how cold is underrated and that Russia is the 6th highest global producer and the third highest consumer, but when he takes over he'll maximize production.
COD but if they're brainrot. (I don't know what possessed me to do this, uni exams are causing me to tweak).
I formally apologise to: Simon "Ghost" Riley, John Price, John "Soap" MacTavish, Kyle "Gaz" Garrick, Gary "Roach" Sanderson, Kate Laswell, Alejandro Vargas, Rodolfo "Rudy" Parra, Nikolai, Phillip Graves, König, Kim "Horangi" Hong-jin, Vladimir Makarov
i did NOT take this seriously 🥴im jit yapping
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Ghost - monday left me broken
Soap's dead, Roach's dead, Mara's dead (in the mobile comics), monday left him broken.
If I were to recount *all* of the shit that he had to go through, I would be here for awhile but I know we know what our Ghost had experienced, he's broken but he's still kicking! Onto Tuesday, Wednesday!
So I think it's a fair assessment for him to be monday left me broken
I also think he listens to the song unironically sometimes
Captain Price - smurf cat
Do I really have to explain this one?
I guess COD nation sees Papa Smurf in him but the thing about smurf cat is that it has a hat, therefore it must be Price
The resemblance is uncanny sometimes (it's just a hat)
i don't have much to say, it's literally just appearance-based for this one
Soap - prime and lunchly
soap is the type of guy to walk into the recording studio and come out with "from the screen, to the ring, to the pen, to the king, where's my crown? that's my bling, always drama, when i ring. see i believe that if i see it in my heart, smash through the ceiling, 'cause i'm reaching for the stars." look me in my metaphorical eyes and tell me im wrong
he would be guzzling down the cherry freeze after a long hard day of training
he likes his cheese drippy bruh
he kinda looks like haley welch if you squint
Gaz - gaining aura
I LOVE GAZ RAAAAH
Look at him? He literally can't physically lose aura?
I'm biased towards Gaz
Even breathing can earn this man aura, there is something innately charismatic and charming about Gaz to the point that even if he trips on air or accidentally walks around with an open bag, typically aura-losing activities, he just wouldn't lose any.
Look at him
He is Kyle "Gaz" Garrick.
Roach - cooked
well, technically, 'cooked' typically indicates that a food item has been processed through fire, at least usually
but i guess this is using the brainrot terminology, still, that changes nothing
cooked in brainrot means to be struggling, done for or that the situation is just bad, the entire brazilian militia being after his ass after he fell from the roof was one of his most iconic moments, he had many cooked moments in the campaign but that one truly defined him, he was, in fact, cooked
literally and figuratively
Laswell - galvanised square steel
galvanised square steel is an extremely durable material, is able to transform even the smallest 1mx1m square apartment into a fully functional multi-purpose home with the assistance of eco-friendly wood veneers and
as ghost put it, "laswell's still solid as a rock" except, she's as solid as galvanised square steel
she's reliable, resilient and shes like the foundation as the galvanised square steel while 141 is like the eco-friendly wood veneers
Alejandro - oil up
one could say that all men in cod could represent 'oil up' but i think alejandro embodies the 'oil up' phrase
im actually just straight tweaking when i say this but i think he'd have a similar community to orange peanut's if he ever became an influencer, like different content but his comment section would be filled with 'when are you going to oil up'
i also think he'd be the kind of guy to gladly oil up on request, granted there was an ample amount of oil
Rodolfo - livvy dunne
rudy doesn't really strike me as a rizzer more like a rizzee (im tweaking so hard right now)
he seems like the type of guy to get rizzed up by baby gronk and then promptly train for his gymnastics or something
there's not much to comment on here, just that he looks like the type of guy to be rizzed
Nikolai - metal pipe sound effect
nikolai is unique in the sense that i think he encapsulates the metal pipe sound effect rather than a phrase or a brainrot figure
i have a feeling that during violence and timing gaz would agree with me
i have a feeling that the butcher in mw2019 would also agree with me
he's a menace but no brainrot compilation is the same without the metal pipe sound effect so :333
Phillip Graves - only in ohio
that gif shows up when i search for ohio
i feel like this one is very self-explanatory
in some instances gyatt and ohio can be used interchangeably so i would also consider him having the dual position of embodying gyatt and ohio at the same time, lucky bloke
König - alpha wolf
furry könig skin
furry wolf skin, no further commentary needed
Horangi - 99% of gamblers quit before they hit big
that is just what he did
Makarov - skibidi toilet
we have all seen the smile skin
skibidi toilet is evil incarnate, poisoning the minds of the children, even in the lore of skibidi toilet it is evil and direct antagonistic villains towards camera head people, sounds just like makarov
the smile skin is like the mould on lunchly cheese, its the outward thing you see but the evil of skibidi toilet like makarovs evil is like the mould spores inside the cheese
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it is now nearly 3am, im so failing my histology class man
does anyone wanna hold hands until we feel a little braver
something something johnny very seriously asking you to put him in a cock cage two weeks after his vasectomy because he doesn't think he has the willpower to not cum in you for 12 weeks and the cock cage was closer than the near empty box of condoms in the bottom drawer of the beside cabinet something something
I need more photos from this angle. Like on the ground looking up at him doing the tippy-toe hip tilt. Dick forward, facing the world.
subtitles should be on automatically. people who don’t want them should have to turn them off
The allure of AI entices those people who fetishize ideas but dismiss the work. They're the people who tell writers, "I'll give you the idea, then you write it, and we'll split the profits." For them, the vision is everything, and the work is just an annoying obstacle. But the WORK is everything. The work is how a thing happens, where it's made, where skill is put to work. AI in creativity is for the people who have no skill, no work, no effort, no ethic. They just want to push a button.
– Chuck Wendig
21, Genderfluid, Any PronounsHi! I'm very new to Tumblr, and a chronic lurker
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