Sir You Are Pushing 30, You Don't Get To Meow

why is he so sassy here

Batman: Shaman #4

Dumb thing that would not leave my brain

Somewhere, far away from Piltover 💕

Bruce Wayne except he texts like an ominous boomer

wdym you can't tell if he's threatening them?

Based on this post by @mysterycitrus :)

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Bonus:

Happy birthday, Tim 🥰

Wait… I just found out that this picture comes from Jon’s dreams… you mean to tell me Jon dreamt up Damian in this outfit………

Protective, jealous, and possessive

Adrien: (tries to pet Titus without asking)

Damian: Don’t. He'll bite.

Adrien: But he's wearing a muzzle!

Damian: I'll take it off...

part 2 of giving bruce dad core attributes starting with forgetting which child has what dietary requirements.

bruce: here you go damian your lactose free meal

damian: father i’m vegan drake is lactose

bruce: tim is?? aw shit *hurries to find tim*

bruce placing down a piece of paper and a pen: ok everyone write their dietary needs on this please so i can give it to the caterer

dick: how can you not remember 😭

bruce: because there’s so many of you

tim: alfred remembers

bruce: alfred doesn’t count i’m pretty sure he’s not human

bruce: is duke still allergic to honey?

tim with his head in his hands: bee stings he’s allergic to bee stings

dick: damian is vegan

bruce: what? i thought steph was vegan?

dick: no steph is vegetarian damian is vegan

bruce: jesus christ

bruce: oh he can’t have that he’s allergic to peanuts

dick: what no i’m not?

bruce: yes you are

dick: i’ve never been allergic to peanuts where did you even get that-omg bruce jason was allergic to walnuts!

bruce: was???

Bruce truly hates magic with every pump and beat of his heart.

What kinda curse is Slang, anyway?

“This is the best day of my life.”

“You thought you ate that.” Bruce physically feels a full body shiver, charged with nausea and cringe. “This is level 10 cringe. Can’t have shit in Gotham.”

Dick is his earth bound angel, but he laughs like a demon at him, holding onto Jason for support, pledging his eternal loyalty to Zatana and her pettiness.

—

“Hey, old bat, hook me up with an adrenaline shot.”

What he wants to say is Jay, do not try and fight with 6 bullets in your stomach.

What comes out instead, through Bruce’s grit teeth and intense, fierce glaring, “Not you trying to go back to your corpse era. See how I only took 2 shots? Very demure. Very mindful.”

Jason passes out from blood loss, but mostly laughter.

—

“Chat, is this real?”

Stephanie barely bites back a full belly cackle. “I think he just asked us if we copied.”

“I wish I was Jason, 15.”

—

“This is not a slay environment. Killing is flop behavior.” He keeps his eyes shut and buries his face in his hands. Trying to convince Damian not to stab someone doesn’t seem to work.

Damian gives him a pat like he’s a pitiful cat. “I’ll only stab the non lethal areas.”

“God, I wish that were me.”