Headcanon that a fact very rarely known about Damian Wayne al Ghul, son of Bruce What emotion am I feeling today Wayne, is that he's a crier. Whenever he's having a bad day, the only thing that can fix it and make him feel better is a long, hard cry.
Of course, he's learned to cry completely silently (growing up in the league that viewed every supposed weakness as lethal will do that to you). He's also very good at compartmentalization and can push it down until he has time and privacy enough to let go.
When he first came to the manor, it was in the in suite bathroom behind two locked doors with the shower running. Once he started trusting him, it was on his eldest brother's shoulder.
The day he goes to Bruce to be held when he's crying, his father goes wide eyed, heart so full of love it hurts and it's like finding he has a son all over again.
Supportive space-uncle
mmm WIP
Damian being an artist is so dear to me in many ways, he can use this creative outlet to show how he views things, people, himself in such a deeply vulnerable way without having to say it.
Give me a Damian who paints his family portraits for their birthdays or just for himself, give me Wayne brothers each painted in Damian's style but distinctly different from each other. Different elements are highlighted for each person.
Give me Dick painted in chunky, light strokes reminiscent to van Gogh.
Give me Bruce painted in colors just off from being black and white.
Give me Jason so desaturated or monotoned that when Damian uses color for his eyes they almost glow green against everything.
Give me Cass unshaded and abstract.
Give me Duke painted in the brightest of bright colors against the darkest of shadows, bonus points if glow-in-the-dark paints were used.
But Tim? Tim has always been terribly difficult to draw, Damian just can't get his face right.
He won't let Tim best him in this way, it's unacceptable, but Damian will not let anyone see his artwork not at it's best. He does everything he can just not to draw Tim's face—his favorite is to spiral Tim's face, maybe he'll leave an eye or paint whatever flower he thinks best represents his brother that day right in the middle.
And Tim just loves it.
The first time Damian painted Tim and gave him the piece, he was uncertain of how it'd be received though he'd deny this with every breath in his lungs. He was prepared for Tim to hate it, to get angry that he distorted his face in such a way—and he could see the same thoughts on the faces of everyone who saw Damian present it to Tim. Why wouldn't he hate it? It'd be disrespectful to anyone, especially if the artist and the muse had such a disastrous relationship. He couldn't be blamed, but Damian was prepared to blame him regardless.
Tim was silent for what felt like hours when he laid eyes on the portrait Damian had painted of him. He hadn't expected any portrait Damian painted of him, if he ever painted one of Tim at all, to make him feel so... seen? Understood? Viewed in a way Tim could have never described?
If Tim cried? That's none of your business.
Peters phone dings and he asked Tony to read the text for him
Tony confused: "who is 'big balls man'???"
Peter casually: "oh that's Ned"
Tony: "what the- 'autistic weed dealer'?? Who tf-?"
Peter: "that's MJ"
Tony blinking confused: "istg if you named Romanoff 'mommy'-"
Peter: "no that's loki- Ms Romanoff is 'terrifier 3'"
Tony:
Peter:
Tony: "what the fuck are these names kid-?? WHO IS 'INTERGALACTIC CUMSOCK'!?"
Peter: "that's Thor"
Tony: "WHAT'S MY NAME??"
Peter: "just Mr stark with the chair emoji"
Tony:
Peter:
Tony offended: "that is so not fair-"
bruce would be fucking HILARIOUS in his idgaf era just imagine:
bruce: come home
jason: what? so you can throw me in--
bruce: no, just come home. i want you home, so come home.
jason: i'm not fallin for this shit!
bruce: i no longer care about all of *points between himself and jason* this mess. i want to go home, play monopoly with my kids and be mad about the lot of you cheating. that is what i want, so that is what will happen.
jason: you're being ridiculous.
bruce: frankly, i dont give a fuck. now, what piece do you want, the hat or the car?
jason:....
bruce:.....
jason: the car.
bruce: fantastic, be home in 10.
Damian: *hits a growth spurt and now he's taller than Tim and Duke*
Jason: No
Damian: *grows taller than Dick*
Jason: No no
Damian: *taller than Bruce and eye level with Jason*
Jason: No no no –
yandere simulator yuri
i don’t support yandere dev
Okay hear me out. Batfamily, ugly Christmas sweater addition.
Bruce Wayne:
No doubt in my mind his children forced him into it. As soon as Dick mentioned wearing ugly sweaters on Christmas Day he found this monstrosity sitting in his closet. He chucked it out. He forgot about it. The next week it was back. He threw it out again. Two days passed. It was back. He tried shredding it, burning it, burying it in the backyard. It reappeared each time. Needless to say, it was still there on Christmas and he reluctantly wore it to the delight of everybody.
Jason Todd:
He wanted absolutely nothing to do with what Dick had planned… at first. Then he realised it was a great opportunity to piss Bruce off. Funny enough, it didn’t work as he hoped as Bruce was just happy he was there.
Tim Drake:
Wanted nothing to do with it and still wants nothing to do with it. Chose the first thing on the rack. Would’ve given Young Justice the chance to chose he sweater but he doesn’t trust them to NOT get him something horrendous.
Dick Grayson:
Planned this whole thing just to wear this monstrosity he found while doom scrolling on Instagram reels (he has adhd and is a millennial, he sure as hell isn’t on TikTok BUT dopamine go brrr). His siblings hate him. He loves it.
Damian Wayne:
This boy FOUGHT like one of those cats being forced into a costume. He clawed and begged and weaponised crying. Dick cackled at him until he had it on. He stayed on Dicks shoulders for the rest of the night. They did not talk for a month after.
He will stab anyone who brings it up.
Stephanie Brown:
Okay picture this in hot pink. She immediately locks onto some sort of meme when Dick mentions ugly sweaters. She finds this ugly ass sweater and steals Bruce’s credit card to get it.
Cassandra Cain:
Stephanie immediately calls Cass with plans. She happily agrees. She helps Steph steal Bruce’s credit card and proudly pulls Steph around to show the whole family their matching sweaters. A photo of them recreating the meme with their matching sweaters spreads around the web for at least a week.
Barbra Gordon:
Along with this sweater, Barbs places a USB stick containing a compilation of epic patrol failures in each of the Bat’s Christmas stockings. She wants to keep them on their toes (and adequately afraid of her). It is effective.
Duke Thomas:
Same vain as Steph. Instantly clocked in on memes and found this bad boy. Shows up with yellow temporary dye on his hair and old-lady sunglasses from the dollar store. Whenever he faces the slightest inconvenience he asks to speak to the manager. It becomes a bit where the manager changes each time and becomes crazier than the last.
Alfred Pennyworth:
Motherfucker would not wear a ugly sweater no matter how much the children begged. And the children did beg (Damian had to pull out the puppy dog eyes for this one). Jason was actually the fucker who made him cave pulling out all the stops, “it’s my first Christmas with everyone since I… you know.”, “it would be nice to have something special to remember it you know?”, “I remember my first Christmas in the manor. I just want to feel that happy again.”
Jason comes prepared with the sweater and Alfred knows he’s lost (but he doesn’t really seem to mind when he sees all the smiling faces on Christmas Day).
I think anyone that studies medicine with Damian would lowkey hate his ass.
Not in a mean way, but in a petty why-aren't-you-struggling-like-me type of way. I mean, thanks to Robin and the league Damian is light years ahead of everyone on terms of experience and it would show.
Half the class is puking their guts out the first time they see a patient with an open fracture. Damian has been there, done that, seen that and worse. He's eating m&m's in the back.
They're all practicing making sutures until late. Damian is like "No, I don't need to join you. I could suture with my eyes closed" and then when someone is like "prove it, rich-boy" that mf actually blindfolds his eyes and sutures perfectly using four different techniques.
He also passes everything with flying colors! Because of course, the guy can't just be rich, good looking and famous, he has to be smart too.
And it just gets worse when he starts his actual residency.
Nothing shakes him! Thirty hour shifts? He doesn't even yawn. Extreme stress during a surgery gone awry? Damian is the one telling the other members of the surgical team to stay calm. Violent patient? They don't even get to call security, Damian has the guy pinned already.
And it would be easier to not get jealous of him if he somehow was a souless blood sucking asshole. But Damian is a good person, awkward and standoffish but always willing to help. He's there for whatever people need. He aids nurses, listens to patients, conforts victims. He sits with people for the bad news and when someone dies he gets this sad faraway look that shows he cares.
And it's just so unfair.
Tim, slightly drunk: I told you all that I lost my spleen, but I actually know exactly where it is, because Ra’s keeps it in a jar on his bedside table.
Jason, also drunk: THATS WHAT THAT IS?!?!
Tim: you’ve seen it? HOW HAVE YOU SEEN IT?!
Jason: I had to take Damian to visit Talia at the league!
Tim: AND YOU ENDED UP IN RA’S BEDROOM?
Jason: every time I go there I put an assortment of miscellaneous vegetables in his bedding to convince him he’s going insane.
Tim:
Tim: that’s actually kinda cool.
Jason: it’s the only thing that makes escourting the kid back and forth worth it.
Damian, twelve, Tim and Jason’s designated driver of the evening: I swear mother has assigned you to me like some sort of service dog, Todd.
Jason, nodding: or personal uber.
Tim: come to think of it I have seen you lay your head on him whenever you think he’s anxious-
Jason: HE SAYS IT HELPS-!
Damian: -fucking stay out of it, Drake!
Tim: aight damn