Batfam Headcanon #2

Dick is the type of person to yell “Bruce catch!” And let go of his grapple while swinging full speed.

When Dick eventually left behind was fired from Robin he still continued swinging at Bruce, and Bruce never failed to catch him.

And when Jason became Robin, and Dick got mostly past Bruce giving his name to the kid. Dick told Jason stories about it, never showing him except once, when he and Bruce were on slightly better terms. Dick did it more forceful than usual.

It took Jason a month or two as Robin before he was comfortable enough with Bruce to trust him to catch him.

For Tim, they didn’t show him. But he’d picked it up from seeing Dick and Jason do it. The first time he did it, it damn near gave Bruce and Dick a heart attack.

For the short period Steph was Robin see never got the chance. But you bet she remedied that when she became Spoiler.

Damian was more hesitant. Always worried it would be a trick. Because it was an easy way to ‘accidentally’ cause him harm. But after seeing Dick, Tim, and Steph do it and be caught every time, he eventually gave in. You’d never catch him admitting it but that first moment wrapped in his Father’s arms as Bruce caught him for the first time, and the small smile Bruce gave him when he stepped away, that is one of his favorite memories.

Cause Bruce would always be there to catch him.

He couldn’t catch Jason, never again.

De aged Damian that doesn’t recognize anyone but Jason.

He’s like 3-5 years old and vehemently refuses any physical contact from anybody except for Jason. Dick is absolutely distraught and Jason is trying not to audibly awe at how adorable little dami was.

For the few days that he’s lil dami, you will never see him without being attached to Jason is some sort of capacity. Breakfast? He’s sitting next to or on Jason. Nap time? You think he wouldn’t fall asleep on his elder brother’s abdomen? Damian is in the cave? He’s latched onto Jason’s leg and telling him he is prohibited from leaving him to go on patrol (Dick offers to stay back with him and Damian bites him).

Damian being an Anime fan is so funny to me, because he's the one people would expect it from the least.

Bruce is at an event and gets asked about his kids interests, and he is like "Oh, where to start! One of my boys, he loves those Japanese caricatures, you know. He buys these comic books that are backwards... He's always reading them."

And everyone turns to look at Tim.

Tim, resident cool skater boy, with his vintage cameras and old school Vans is like "??"

Then Bruce goes, "And another one of them. Oh, how he likes likes classic literature. Jane Austen, Oscar Wilde, Virginia Woolf, you name it."

And everyone turns to Damian.

Damian, who radiates old money and talks like a Victorian child stuck in the 21st century. Yet spends his time kicking his feet to Shoujo Manga and drawing OCs, is like "??"

And somewhere in Crime Alley Jason feels a disturbance in the force

.

Made this for the Wrong Organ discord server

Does the Batmobile ever get ticketed or does the GCPD just ignore it

Bruce: *puts a box on the table*

Bruce: Gather around, everyone. It's time for our monthly ticket review.

Bruce: First up, Steph. Can you explain what happened last Friday?

[earlier]

Steph: *looking for parking in a full lot*

Steph: Screw it, I'm going around back.

Steph: *parks in front of a fire exit*

[present]

Steph: I just needed to use the bathroom.

Bruce: And in those three minutes, the Joker released a giant water balloon forcing everyone to evacuate through one less exit.

Steph: It said "fire exit." That technically wasn't a fire.

Bruce: Well, the penalty is $100 plus the towing cost. I can pay it off but you have to help Alfred in the kitchen for a month.

Steph: Yeah, that's fair.

Bruce: Next up... Cass and Barbara? Color me surprised.

Barbara: Oh yeah, I had to remotely pilot the Batmobile the other day because Cass needed a getaway.

Bruce: Then why am I being charged $250?

[earlier]

Cass: *fighting a gang*

Barbara: Orphan, ETA thirty seconds. Prepare for extraction.

Cass: *knocks out the last henchman and runs to the car*

Comm. Gordon: *writing a ticket*

Cass: ?

Comm. Gordon: You're in a disabled parking spot without a permit.

[present]

Barbara: Well I am disabled.

Bruce: Understandable. I'll let it slide since it's the first time. Just file the paperwork for a permit.

Bruce: Dick, you went thirty-five over the speed limit when you weren't pursuing a suspect. Explain.

[earlier]

Wally: Race you to Keystone?

Dick: *revs the engine*

[present]

Bruce: You're better than this. I'm disappointed. Next up: Tim. Driving without a license plate. What happened there?

[earlier]

Tim: I wasn't supposed to take the Batmobile since Bruce benched me for my wrist, but my other ride is in the shop.

Kon: What about cameras? Can't your dad tap into the city's surveillance system?

Bart: Traffic cameras read license plates, so if we take them off, no one will recognize us.

Kon: Now that's an idea.

[present]

Tim: That's on me. I shouldn't have listened to them.

Bruce: Put them back on, plus you're benched for another week. Damian, on to you.

Damian: What on Earth could I have done? I followed the speed limit, parked in the correct spots, and never so much as changed lanes on an empty road without signalling.

[earlier]

Damian, a middle schooler: *driving*

[present]

Damian: Tt.

Bruce: Don't do it again. Duke...

Duke: *cringes and remembers what he did*

[earlier]

Duke: *hooks the Batmobile to a freezer trailer*

Duke: *starts driving around with a megaphone*

Duke: Ice cream! Get your ice cream!

[present]

Bruce: Fantastic job. No complaints.

Jason, muttering: Teacher's pet.

Bruce: And finally, Jason.

Bruce: *empties the rest of the box*

really enjoyed this scene from fraycheck by surveycorpsjean on ao3

Still think this is the funniest Hannibal post I’ve ever seen

i think... this is flirting.

Bawling my eyes out at the thought of Dick’s last bit of parting advice for Damian on how to be Bruce’s Robin (before he went back to blud) being “just pretend to fall asleep during a stake out. Trust me”

Of course Damian’s sceptical and it takes him a long time to even THINK about making himself look that vulnerable but his curiosity eventually wins and he pretends to fall asleep during a boring night.

He thought he was prepared for all possibilities but he was not prepared for Bruce to call out his name, sigh softly and scoop him up, not letting go of him even once until they reach his bed (he will never admit it but he actually did end up falling asleep). He was absolutely not prepared for Bruce to take his shoes off, tuck him in and hesitate just a little second before giving him a forehead kiss and leaving the room silently. He ends up actually falling asleep on the very next week