Read A Fanfic Where Tim Drake Thinks Bruce Ignored His Birthday, Then On Some Random Day Was Like, "Happy

Bruce, who has a problem expressing emotions because he was teased for them in school as the "crazy Wayne kid"

Bruce, who used to clutch Alfred at night and wet himself due to his nightmares.

Bruce, who got flashbacks till his mid-twenties everytime he walked down an alley.

Bruce, who would hug a weeping Dick Grayson and stay with him until the night terrors were over, humming a soft lullaby that Bruce's mother sang for him

Bruce, who hardened his mouth and his life to keep the anger in check after Jason, because he knew if he didn't every criminal would pay.

Bruce, who sees Damian chopping up shrubbery and thinks "I was far worse as a child inside, it's a good thing he's letting it out"

Bruce, who can't walk by a homeless child in the street without calling his special Wayne Foundation liaison (who he keeps on speed dial) and asking her to find "one more spot"

Bruce, who sees Selina petting kittens and robbing the rich and thinks "if I could have had a life with her, that would have been nice"

Bruce, who looks at Cass' x-rays and sees her knit bones and swears to god he will break the bones of whoever's responsible for her upbringing

Bruce, who gives Tim projects that he himself can do faster because he sees attention-starved Tim trying to please him

Bruce, who looks at Clark smiling and thinks of what he can buy for his birthday to make him smile just like that.

Bruce to his parents in their graves after not being able to catch a criminal: I'm sorry. I've failed you. I'll try harder.

People who don't know Bruce: why is that man so unfeeling.

Bad DC writers: idk just that way i guess

they liked this on twitter im thinking you would too

Steph: So who would you say is the pretty brother amongst the four of you?

Tim: Oh Dick for sure

Dick: Aww...

Jason: Actually... If we're talkin' man pretty than yeah, it's Dick, but if we're talkin' pretty pretty, Damian

Tim: Really??

Jason: Yeah put a wig on him and his basically his mom.

Dick:

Tim:

Dick and Tim: Oh my god...

--------

Damian, simply just minding his own business in his room with his best friend Jon

Dick, Jason and Tim busting open his door: Damian we need you to put on a wig!

Damian: Excuses me!?

Jon quietly to himself simply trying to hold it together: holy shit..

punkflower where hobie likes to crochet in his spare time bcs it keeps his hands busy; he does it while he’s daydreaming and it’s great! it’s fun! it’s relaxing!

the problem is that he can’t stop making things related to miles.

he picks up his hook and when he looks down again he’s made a little crochet spider in red and black. he doesn’t even remember reaching for the colours.

he tries again a few days later and by the time he realises he’s daydreaming about miles’s face and miles’s hair and miles’s smile, he’s already nearly done with a loose-knit navy cardigan. he ties it off temporarily and tries it even though he already has a feeling it won’t fit properly, and he’s right.

it’s too short on him.

because he’d subconsciously made it to miles’s measurements that he’d eyeballed.

fuck.

he finishes it anyway, passes it to miles all nonchalant just to get it off his hands and off his mind but the next time they hang out miles is wearing it and hobie has to stand in the corner with his mouth shut before he puts his foot in it, because the cardigan fits perfectly and if he talks he’s absolutely going to embarrass himself. miles is laughing with his head thrown back and hobie desperately wants to kiss him.

but obviously he can’t, so he crochets more instead and it gets even worse. he’s burning through his red and blue yarn like paper; he’s made headphone accessories, keychains, beanies, a whole collection of loose-knit tops bcs he can’t get the image of miles wearing the first one out of his head.

it’s ridiculous and he drives himself up the wall with it, but he gives them to miles anyway and says they’re just practice pieces until gwen and pav ambush him in his flat and yell at him to finally fucking confess or they’ll do it for him, bcs miles is decked out in swag knitwear and they keep getting stopped on the street by strangers asking where he gets his clothes and you know what he says?

he says they’re just his friend’s test pieces. with a sad little smile.

and hobie can’t stand it anymore, because he practically CUSTOM-MADE everything, test pieces his ass. he opens a portal right to miles’s room and his heart squeezes when he sees that miles is in one of the sweaters he made, cream-coloured with a maroon star on the front, a little green knitted sprout tied to his headphones on top of his head.

miles slams his sketchbook shut, blushing like he’s been caught, and hobie walks right up to him and says, “they weren’t practice pieces.”

miles blinks at him, still clearly flustered. “o…kay?”

he soldiers on. “i made them for ya. with you in mind. by accident.” see? he opens his mouth and puts his bloody foot in it IMMEDIATELY. he fumbles to do some damage control but miles is smiling crookedly, pulling his headphones off.

“you handmade me enough things to fill half my closet… by accident.”

“yeah.”

hobie has to force himself to breathe because miles is standing up and then they’re kissing and every damn thought gets wiped clean out of his brain.

“was that by accident too?” miles asks, close enough that hobie can smell the cocoa butter he uses on his skin, something warm tucked beneath his wry smirk and hobie wants to kiss it off his damn mouth, so he does.

(afterwards, they tumble down to dinner grinning like fools. miles’s parents don’t question, and they miss gwen and pav fist-bumping just outside the window.)

Tim, 36 hours of sleep driving like a madman on Gotham roads: FUCKING MOVE. SLOW MOTHER FUCKER WHAT ARE YOU- OH YEAH? JUST WONDER TO THE RIGHT WITHOUT SIGNALLING WHY DONT YA? MAYBE NEXT TIME JUST DO US ALL A FAVOUR AND CRASH INTO THAT GODDAMN TRUCK THATS BACKING OUT THAT YOU DIDNT EVEN BOTHER TO GODDAMN SEE-

Damian, just wanting to get to school since Alfred couldn’t drive him: I assure you these imbeciles are not worth your anger Dra-

Tim: I SWEAR IF ANYONE CUTS ME OFF ONE MORE TIME.

*Gets cut off*

Tim: ALRIGHT BITCHES. I WARNED YOU.

Damian, screaming: DRAKE. STOP THIS INSTANT. DRAKE. YOU ARE ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE ROAD-

i think... this is flirting.

🦅 here

Part 14 master-post

Bawling my eyes out at the thought of Dick’s last bit of parting advice for Damian on how to be Bruce’s Robin (before he went back to blud) being “just pretend to fall asleep during a stake out. Trust me”

Of course Damian’s sceptical and it takes him a long time to even THINK about making himself look that vulnerable but his curiosity eventually wins and he pretends to fall asleep during a boring night.

He thought he was prepared for all possibilities but he was not prepared for Bruce to call out his name, sigh softly and scoop him up, not letting go of him even once until they reach his bed (he will never admit it but he actually did end up falling asleep). He was absolutely not prepared for Bruce to take his shoes off, tuck him in and hesitate just a little second before giving him a forehead kiss and leaving the room silently. He ends up actually falling asleep on the very next week

Damian Wayne: Future Gay Disaster for Jonathan Kent

Listen. LISTEN. Damian Wayne is so obviously going to grow up gay for Jon Kent that it’s almost embarrassing how no one in the Batfamily is ready for it.

Like, imagine teenage Damian—still all sharp edges, broody glares, and definitely still carrying a sword at inappropriate times—trying to process the fact that his best friend is also absurdly perfect, stupidly strong, and unfairly nice to him at all times.

It starts subtle. Jon smiles at him a little too brightly? Damian short-circuits. Jon picks him up once during a mission? Damian enters a silent existential crisis and has to sit in the Batcave for three hours just thinking about it.

Tim figures it out first. He watches Damian refuse to insult Jon for a full five minutes and just mutters, "Oh my god. He’s doomed."

Dick tries to give Damian the "So You Like Boys?" talk, only for Damian to pull out a 12-page essay on how love is a weakness. But the next day, Jon says one (1) vaguely affectionate thing, and suddenly Damian is on a rooftop at 3 AM whispering “Love is a weakness… love is a weakness…” like he’s trying to cast a spell and make it true.

Meanwhile, Jon? Completely oblivious. Sunshine golden retriever energy, just happy to be there. This boy could literally cradle Damian in his arms while flying him across the city, and he’d just be like, “Best friend privileges!” Meanwhile, Damian is holding on for dear life like, "This is where I die. He smells like fresh air and goodness. This is the end."

Eventually, when Damian does realize his feelings, it’s going to be a full Batfamily event. Jason is taking bets. Tim is smug. Dick is way too excited. And Bruce? He’s just staring at Clark across the table, already regretting everything.

TL;DR: Damian is going to grow up, look at Jon Kent, and have the worst gay panic of his life. And it’s going to be hilarious.