As Gregor Samsa Awoke One Morning From Uneasy Dreams He Found Himself Lying In A Familiar Ballpit

I find it kind of epic I find it kind of rad

He's sopping wet. He's pathetic. His dick game is terrible. He looks bad. He cries at the slightest provocation. Hes trembling in fear. He's unreliable. His personality is sad, just sad. I didn't say a name but he popped into your head, didn't he? ☺️

hello skinny internet user. there is a bomb strapped to your chest. in front of you is fanart of a fat character. compliment them without using the words "soft", "huggable", or "cuddly". you have 30 minutes. if you fail to acknowledge fat people as actual human beings and not living teddy bears you will be blown up. the clock is ticking.

Do You Love The Colours Of The Children's Hospital?

I'm so sorry what have I done

I cant even fantasize abt letting worms and wolves pick my whole body apart bone by bone somewhere in the woods anymore cuz i know theres microplastics in my lungs and shit. Its just not as primal with microplastics involved. The vibe is gone

and ive always said this!!

being a female knight fucking sucks. every squire boy i get turns out to be an adult woman with short hair who's just in it to sensually strap my armor to me. CHOP CHOP bitch the French are trying to sack our castle!

thank god anything at all useful is being torn down and made illegal so that the computer can just be a box you turn on to watch ads for fake phone games

why do we sleep on wrestling? it’s boomer riverdale. there’s an undead guy who’s controlled by a little dude with an urn that has his parents’ ashes in them. someone almost gets buried alive in an actual grave (in the ring). there was a plotline in steve austin’s rivalry with WWE owner vince mcmann where there rivalry is interrupted by an entity called the higher being who leads a cult that crucifies wrestlers. they kidnap vince mcmann’s daughter to make her marry an undead wizard. mcmann comes on the big screen and demands the higher being removes his mask- and when he does, it’s VINCE MCMANN. at one point someone drove a truck into the ring and started spraying water

TL;DR: professional wrestling is high camp